The most effort this dude has put into anything. Block and Toss.

elainejay82 · 2022-03-20T18:35:44+00:00

Just a hot tip, do not ever ever threaten a restraining order on a man. If you're going to ever give him one, just do it without letting him know. This was advice given to me by a woman who had been a sergeant for 20+ years.

If the man is a creep, there is almost nothing you can do to get him to stop contacting you. I'm glad it worked in this case (for now), but just know that with a LOT of men in this frame of mind, they will see it as nothing more than a test to keep pushing themselves on you.

Responding in any way shape or format to them, usually means that your case would be closely looked at as "Well, she kept replying to him." It's not fair, but officers will absolutely take it that way. This was advice given to me by a retired police officer. Also, the men themselves love the responses and do not care if the responses are negative. They are living for some sort of feedback from you or about you. As you can tell in his response, him hearing anything back at all - even with the threat of a restraining order - is absolutely the most important thing to him. Don't fall into this trap with him or guys like this again. Make note, document the behavior, block.

Do not ever respond to this guy again, do the hardest blocks you can, everywhere, and if it gets too bad, file the restraining order without warning. Even then, filing a restraining order usually amps up their behavior (told to me by the female sergeant).

Hopefully he dies out in your spam folders where he belongs, but check it sometimes to see what the dude is thinking. If he's showing a weapon, starting to show up to where you live/work, then file the order.

These types of creeps are no fucking joke (ask me how I know). I hope he leaves you alone after this, but I wouldn't put my money on that.

Edit to add: When we threaten a restraining order, it puts us in the tough position of him calling our bluff or us having to follow through with filing one if he does contact you again. Filing restraining orders can be very emotionally traumatic for us. If they see you do not do it after another attempt at communication, they know they have free range to keep bothering you. Just another reason to not give warning.

FUBARfromLSA · 2022-03-20T17:10:53+00:00

Stalker vibes.

Be careful

Geocities_SEO_Expert · 2022-03-20T15:55:57+00:00

A letter on ripped notebook paper, and a $3 sampler booze. He couldn't even buy a $1 packet of stationary and a bottle of grocery store wine.

katiekat0214 · 2022-03-20T16:23:36+00:00

Sorry this is dark, and the handwriting is spidery. Can you transcribe?

ShittyPianist · 2022-03-20T17:27:40+00:00

I had a dude do this to me too. Did we both date the same guy? Hahaha

mothboon · 2022-03-20T20:57:24+00:00

Omg.. why do so many men write like this?? It's like they chant forth the same demonic caveman and it writes it for them using their body as the catalyst 🤔

queenofswordsxxx · 2022-03-20T18:01:21+00:00

Took one look at the handwriting and knew this is an unhinged NVM. Block and delete.

LunaPlanner · 2022-03-20T15:51:40+00:00

This is extremely hard to read. What does the letter say?

lostmillenia · 2022-03-20T16:44:32+00:00

2 of my exes have handwriting like that😬

pygmymetal · 2022-03-20T19:51:34+00:00

Handwriting looks like my ex’s

Sallou9 · 2022-03-20T18:32:45+00:00

Why does every man under 40 I know have this exact handwriting?

ThrowRA_lantern · 2022-03-21T00:31:41+00:00

Notice how unemotional and robotic the letter is. * “I saw you and you saw me.” * “I want to love you.” * “I think about you at moments of clarity (?).” * “I was the worst.”

Like what? Does he call that a romantic love letter or a heartfelt apology??

I don’t know… gives me psycho vibes like he’s unable to feel any real emotion for someone. He doesn’t describe anything genuine about you and can’t describe his feelings/attributes beyond basic kindergarten-level. He probably doesn’t know what love actually feels like but scatters the word throughout the letter to get what he wants.

JulyParade · 2022-03-20T17:40:41+00:00

Personally, all letters to me should be typed. I've dated too many men with terrible handwriting. If I need a freaking translation I'm just going to ignore it! I'm not going to make "good handwriting" a make or break standard but this goes miles in showing a man's ability to communicate. This is on the same lines as "must be able to present gifts properly." A tiny bottle of Cointreau in a wadded up piece of paper? Someone please tell me this was at least in a tiny gift bag. But since he texts at midnight I'm guessing it was just shoved in her door unceremoniously.

Jaelismyhomegirl · 2022-03-20T18:10:27+00:00

This is creepy af. I hate the fact that just us going about our daily lives gets the attention of creepy entitled scrotes like this. There’s nothing we can do to avoid it unless we want to cloister ourselves inside for the rest of our lives.

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2022-03-20T23:48:17+00:00

Ok, what I'm learning from the comments is to never date a guy with this style of handwriting 😂

Junior-Lion7893 · 2022-03-21T01:41:56+00:00

This guys writing is horrendous. I can’t make out anything he writes let alone process what he’s saying.

MsXxSelfDestructxX · 2022-03-21T04:23:30+00:00

omg i am cracking up @ chicken scratch writing

thanarealnobody · 2022-03-21T02:30:13+00:00

Jesus, I went to more effort when I wrote a letter to a guy who cheated on me to tell me how much he hurt me (was young and naive and would never do that again)

If I was writing a heartfelt apology because I hurt someone I loved, it would be on nice paper, with a great pen, and the whole letter would be about how sorry I was and that the other person did not deserve it. It wouldn’t be this scrawl on a ripped piece of paper, looking like a ransom note, stuffed in a ziplock bag.

PicoPicoMio · 2022-03-20T22:34:08+00:00

Ew why does this look like my ex wrote this by hand. All women I know have beautiful handwriting. Why do men suck at handwriting…

PogMoThoinSlainte · 2022-03-20T18:31:25+00:00

I had an ex with the same handwriting who wrote letters like this. What followed was a nightmare of stalking - even breaking into my home to leave more letters about watching my daughter and I sleeping. I had to move out of country to get it to stop and he still stalked my brother's house after. Be very careful.

Ok-Win4485 · 2022-03-20T21:15:40+00:00

This is exactly like a guy I went on a coupe of dates with. He had the exact same handwriting and words he used. After I got majorly creepy vibes after our second date and he was immediately pressing for a full on relationship, I blocked him. He left a note similar to this one and flowers at my door. He had been blocked by six other girls and had left notes and presents at their houses. He had a stack of notebook paper and a pen in his backseat in order to write apology notes begging for girls to unblock him/ keep talking to him. My stomach just dropped reading this - is this the same guy or are all creeps so similar?

daisy_0720 · 2022-03-21T09:08:53+00:00

Every man I've dated has this handwriting. Every. Single. One.

Feminineprincess · 2022-03-22T00:47:55+00:00

Did my brother write this?!? For years he would write his homework and songs exactly like this

caliente_poptart · 2022-03-20T17:12:50+00:00

This is wild, I have an ex with exactly the same handwriting who did almost exactly the same thing to me a year after we broke up. Wrote a letter that was supposed to come off ‘romantic’ that he wrote in dozens of pages in a notebook, then mailed that notebook and a bunch of expensive gifts to my house in an effort to get me back. A YEAR after we broke up! I sent them back and told him never to contact me again and rest assured if he tries again, I get a restraining order. Good on you for blocking and tossing!

Title	The most effort this dude has put into anything. Block and Toss.
Author	CoffeeBeforeAdulty
Upvotes	179
Comments	50
Date	March 20, 2022 3:31 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/tinlax/the_most_effort_this_dude_has_put_into_anything/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-most-effort-this-dude-has-put-into-anything.1108398 https://theredarchive.com/post/1108398

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