In the spirit of “trust but verify” I am vetting and went through a man’s texts and DMs because I detected odd energy when he introduced me to his siblings. Everything recent checks out but in looking at past texts from before we met I see that he sent/received sexts, sexy pics, and nudes from random women he’d saved in his phone as “Aimee Tinder” or “Tiffany Bumble.”

Granted this all happened months before we met, and it is very early days. He just recently asked me to be his girlfriend, and he has always been a gentleman. He’s never sexted me or been sexually lewd. It is really hard for me to imagine that other side of him. A charitable reading would be that he was just getting his ex out of his system through a ho phase, but you know if a woman did that men would say she’s for the streets.

I’m concerned that maybe he has a Madonna/Whore complex, but then again maybe I’m being too judgmental. Either way I’m feeling the ick, which isn’t great. So sisters: What does FDS think about men with promiscuous pasts?

ETA: loving these nuanced answers, thank everyone for validating my ick, I’m going to end it. ALSO: thankfully I haven’t slept with him. This is an example of why waiting and vetting hard is a good idea for women.