Can men here comment on these hypocrisies some men say about women?

MarBitt · 2023-05-19T06:25:59+00:00

a, b, c) They like natural AND beautiful women. When you write that you want a man to have broad shoulders, it does not mean that you have no other expectations. d, e) If they don't notice makeup or enhancements, they see it as natural beauty. Men are not very good at recognizing makeup and, like most people, easily believe a pleasing illusion. f, g) They also have a penis and they don't want their wife to have a penis. I don't see anything hypocritical about that.
I don't see any value in virginity, it's hard to comment.
The number of her previous sexual partners is not in itself very important to me, hard to comment. But if a woman has been using sex to get a partner and has repeatedly failed, that could be a red flag.
a) That depends. Did he want to sleep with many women, did he strive for it, does he feel good about it and is he proud of it? So he's probably an alpha. Does he feel abused by women in his past for sex, and did he have sex with them to make them like him, even though he had no desire for sex? So he's probably a slut - he's selling his sexuality. b) I like women who like sex, hard to comment.
However, it is common for a 20s woman to look younger than a 30s woman. Hence the preference for 20s women on the part of these men. Moreover, preference does not mean that in the end he will not choose something else that is realistically offered to him and he will also be satisfied.
Many men do not really have very high demands on women in sex, and it is quite easy to satisfy them.
Yes, people are selfish, men are selfish. If both men and women have inferior fertility, it is a more difficult situation than if only the man has inferior fertility. Women over 35-40 who want children could counter this by looking for highly fertile men under the age of 25 to start a family. But most will not, because such men can hardly offer them sufficient resources and social status. If a man does not require a woman's resources and social status / education, he can prioritize her youth and fertility. It's a matter of priorities, not hypocrisy.
Most men do not claim that they are not shallow when choosing a sexual partner, so there is not much hypocrisy on the part of men. Male speech is direct: boobs, pussy, ass. It's immediately clear what he likes and what he doesn't. Women's speech is much less direct and women often hide behind terms like "nice smile", "kind eyes"... This seems hypocritical from the men's point of view because it seems like pretending that women care about character and not looks.
Yes, being older, divorced and with children is a disadvantage, but not an insurmountable disadvantage if the woman can balance it with advantages.
All the household chores, even if she earns the same as a man? Aren't you exaggerating a bit? By the way, if you have a house with a big garden and some animals, then the woman can do all the household chores, and the man can still expect much more and harder work outside the house, with repairs, preparing wood for winter and the like.
Find men who have more reasonable demands. By the way, cheating is never* excusable.

*I don't want to talk about some completely marginal, hypothetical situations.

Active-Tadpole-477 · 2023-05-19T06:34:00+00:00

Only delusional men say stuff as dumb as this.

Any-Chipmunk5197 · 2023-05-19T06:58:56+00:00

Not much to add, there are indeed a lot of men who have hypocritical and delusional expectations of women

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KneeGal · 2023-05-19T06:50:37+00:00

For a few of those statements, the explanation is quite simple. There are women that men want to have a relationship with which is a subset of women that men just want to have sex with.

Once you differentiate the two, some of the statements are used in the context of finding a life partner while some of the statements are used in the context of simply physical attraction.

OpticalEpilepsy · 2023-05-19T07:54:52+00:00

No they can't they will ignore your request because they don't want to criticize their own. Now if you asked them to comment on women's hypocrisy they will type out a gettysburg address because they hate femoids that cause inceldom.

obviousredflag · 2023-05-19T08:08:50+00:00

Not all men are the same. Your contradicting comments are hardly uttered by the same man, so it's not contradicting unless you think all men think alike.

f) Men not conventionally attractive themselves, but wants a physically beautiful woman.

g) Women who have wrinkles and grey hair are "hitting a brick wall", but men also have wrinkles and grey hair at the same age.

What people WANT and what they can get are two pair of shoes. On average, men and women age differently and men have a greater emphasis on physical beauty and youth for their partners, while women have a wider spectrum of aging-states that they can find attractive.

a) "I like natural women" to some women wearing makeup, but also...

b) "You're ugly" to some women who aren't wearing makeup.

Translated: i like women who are actually beautiful, not just when dolled up. Still, dolled up women look very beautiful for men on average. If you just want to look at her and maybe fuck her, it doesn't matter if what you see is just a facade, a deceiving image. But as a partner, you want someone who actually possesses the lifestyle and genes that result in the look they have.

Also, frustrated and rejected men often use every angle to "get back" at women. So telling them they are ugly when not wearing make up is a sure way to hurt her.

Women have to value their body and virginity by reserving it, but also their bodies aren't valuable because "they're dime a dozen".

b) She has to reserve her body for one man or until marriage, but if she doesn't sleep with him after their first couple of dates, he's dumping her.

Those are really fringe statements on the spectrum. You need to realize that every possible standpoint towards women is possible and will also be found in the wild. That doesn't mean large parts of the male population hold those views. Very few men think women are "dime a dozen", that is something that only applies to dick that is offered to women.

Very few men think women shoulld reserve their virginity. The men in b) want to sleep with women who they don't regard as marriage material asap, but are looking for a wife who has other values/behavior.

If a woman sleeps with 5 different guys, she has a loose vagina. But if she sleeps with one guy 5 times and regularly uses a dildo, she doesn't?

THis is teenage level of idiocy. A fringe minority of men who had sex still think that vaginas get loose from having sex with multiple partner or even just multiple times. It is used as a way to hurt women who have sex with many guys, but not with the guy who utters this nonsense.

a) If a man sleeps with many women, he's alpha, but if a woman sleeps with many men, she's a slut.

b) She's frigid if she doesn't put out, and an easy whore if she does?

Of course, getting lots of sexual partners for a man is hard and therefore achieving it is something other men praise. For women, getting 100 dick in a week is no problem on average, so they don't get praised for it because they don't need to possess any quality to achieve that. You really need to watch where you hang out. Not even in this sub do some men regularly declare women who are sexually available as whores. The "easy" part emphasises that it's usually hard fore men to get to the point where they have sex with a new partner. Also, notice WHO is saying the whore part. Likely not the men who do have sex with those women, but those that are rejected while other men get an easy to to sex.

Men saying they prefer younger women because they're less experienced, youthful and more fertile. But there's plenty of less experienced women, youthful, fertile 30-something year olds, and more experienced, older-looking, infertile younger women.

Of course there is everything, and everything has a man that is into that. Averages in what men prefer (as casual partners, or relationship partners when they are around the same age) most does not mean the other combinations of traits are not wanted by subgroups of men. Also, there is definitely not PLENTY of less experienced, youthful and fertile 30-something women. Men overwhelmingly get together with women around their own age, as that has many benefits and attractive qualities, that are worth more than youth to them. Large age gaps are something only few people can or want to do.

Expecting the inexperienced woman to perform sexually like an experienced woman.

In what context did you hear or read that? I do not believe that men really had this expectation.

Saying the female fertility decreases and the pregnancy risks increase after the age of 35, while ignoring that sperm quality reduces and risk of cognitive defects rises in children from the age of 35-40.

Yes, they are again hating on older women, as a way to get back at being rejected in the now, while they are young. Most of what you posted are utterings of frustrated, rejected and lonely men who somehow want to hurt women for rejecting them. Yes, fetility becomes more and more problematic the older you get. Still, looking for the best chance would result in you looking for a younger woman than yourself. It's up to the woman to decide if SHE wants to take the risk of an older guy and trying for children.

Women are shallow if they reject a man for his appearance... but is he not shallow for approaching her because of her looks?

I think we all know that looks are important and rejections and approaches both mainly depend on if we are physically attracted. I don't believe you found a man saying that he isn't shallow for picking out an attractive women for her attractiveness as the target of his approaches.

Wouldn't date an older woman who is divorced and has children, but would if it was someone like Adriana Lima, for example.

It's a trade-off. Cons + Pros need to be better than what other women offer, that the man would be able to attract. The average case is that a divorced women with children has very low value compared to never married without children. Adriana Lima is not the average case.

A wife must do all the household chores even though she contributes 50% of the income.

Again, you seem to hang out in super traditional, conservative or just women hating areas. This is not what the average opinion on household chores is. It's not a hypocrisy but just very traditional views transported into today's world. Some men just don't see themselves doing chores and default that work to women.

She must do all the household chores and parental duties, while maintaining interesting hobbies and keeping her husband sexually satisfied, otherwise it's an excuse to cheat?

See above.

This one is more of an Asian thing. She has to be degree-level educated, but not working to completely dedicate to being a housewife.

I don't see the hypocrisy. Education seems to be a status symbol and requirement, but it doesn't need to result in working with that education. A lot of western women go for high education, work some years and then choose to stop intensly following a career and focus on family, while working part time.

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-05-19T05:55:55+00:00

self-contradicting comments a lot on social media

What do you see in your day-to-day reality? Perhaps a combination of some? A little of column A? A little of Column B? TRP has a ton of contradictions. A ton. Does that mean all men who subscribe to it; subscribe to all of it?

The issue isn’t the contradiction. Nor even the social media. It’s the lack of critical thinking. That fuels that social media, in the first place. That’s what needs to be addressed.

Godspeed and good luck!

HelicopteroDeAtaque · 2023-05-19T08:46:14+00:00

1) a) "I like natural women" to some women wearing makeup, but also...

Because men can't differentiate natural looking makeup from no make up, took me some time to realize it myself.

b) "You're ugly" to some women who aren't wearing makeup.

I don't remember the last time a guy called a woman ugly in my presence, can't comment on that.

c) "Take her swimming on the first date" to less conventionally attractive women who are trying to look and feel pretty.

That's a weird first date unless you met her in a vacation resort or something.

d) "She's a natural beauty" to some women who are wearing natural-looking makeup and cosmetic tweakments.

See 1.a

e) Men saying they want natural women, while lusting after cosmetically-enhanced celebrities and social media influencers.

They are just telling that so they can sleep well at night.

f) Men not conventionally attractive themselves, but wants a physically beautiful woman.

We all want someone attractive, but most would settle for less.

g) Women who have wrinkles and grey hair are "hitting a brick wall", but men also have wrinkles and grey hair at the same age.

In the same fashion that there's MILF hunters, there's also DILF hunters, it's just more common among women because women tend to like more experienced men, who tend to me more wrinkly.

2) a) Women have to value their body and virginity by reserving it, but also their bodies aren't valuable because "they're dime a dozen".

The not valuable part i never heard of that, but if someone did say that my rationalization would be that they don't say low partner count bodies aren't valuablez but that of the high partner count.

b) She has to reserve her body for one man or until marriage, but if she doesn't sleep with him after their first couple of dates, he's dumping her.

Until marriage is fucking dumb, imagine you are in a +2 year relationship, you end up marrying only to discover you are sexually incompatible.

What men have problems with is that she fucks OTHER men in less that 3 dates but not him. But if he dumps you after 3 dates he'll probably won't make a good bf.

3) If a woman sleeps with 5 different guys, she has a loose vagina. But if she sleeps with one guy 5 times and regularly uses a dildo, she doesn't?

Yeah, that's fucking stupid and a slutshaming tactic, there are good points to slut shaming but this ain't it.

4) a) If a man sleeps with many women, he's alpha, but if a woman sleeps with many men, she's a slut.

Because it's the men who put in the work, if you consistently can get something other men can't, it's worthy of respect. Women have it much easier, i don't know of many men who wouldn't fuck their girl friends had she only asked.

b) She's frigid if she doesn't put out, and an easy whore if she does?

That's not an issue if the woman sticks to the man she's putting out to.

5) Men saying they prefer younger women because they're less experienced, youthful and more fertile. But there's plenty of less experienced women, youthful, fertile 30-something year olds, and more experienced, older-looking, infertile younger women.

That's just not true, a 30yo will never be comparable to a 20yo, fertility, youthfulness, and experience wise. There are 30 yo and 20 yo who don't look their age, but that's on relative terms.

6) Expecting the inexperienced woman to perform sexually like an experienced woman.

That's just men wanting to have their cake and eat it too. I do prefer inexperienced women, but i know the limitations of wanting that.

7) Saying the female fertility decreases and the pregnancy risks increase after the age of 35, while ignoring that sperm quality reduces and risk of cognitive defects rises in children from the age of 35-40.

You are not wrong, and you can say it back to the men who tell you that.

8) Women are shallow if they reject a man for his appearance... but is he not shallow for approaching her because of her looks?

Oh, men are shallow, everyone is, otherwise we all would be bisexual.

9) Wouldn't date an older woman who is divorced and has children, but would if it was someone like Adriana Lima, for example.

Had to Google that name, that's because the implications and the physical toll it takes on the average woman, while they example you set is a supermodel and is in good shape (although not my cup of tea). Also no man want to think of other dicks poking your gf, and a kid is a constant reminder of that.

10) A wife must do all the household chores even though she contributes 50% of the income.

I never heard of that from a regular guy or a RP man unless it's from someone who is exceedingly misogynistic. Usually men want either trad-wife (0% work 100%chores) or just balance (50% work 50% chores). Anything more and what that man is looking for is a mother.

11) She must do all the household chores and parental duties, while maintaining interesting hobbies and keeping her husband sexually satisfied, otherwise it's an excuse to cheat?

That's outlandish and a very edge case, 95% of men don't think like that, and you probably want to stick to that 95% anyways. Also men usually don't give excuses to cheat, they just do it and tank the damage.

12) This one is more of an Asian thing. She has to be degree-level educated, but not working to completely dedicate to being a housewife.

Not asian so I don't have that experience.

LouisdeRouvroy · 2023-05-19T06:21:05+00:00

You don't seem to understand what contradiction means.

Example: 1a and 1b are not contradicting each other. Of you think so, you have an issue with logic.

Most of what you ranted about is of the same cloth: they're contradict each other only in your head.

Hoopy223 · 2023-05-19T04:45:08+00:00

Thats a lot of raging autism in one post.

Cobra_x30 · 2023-05-19T05:24:38+00:00

You are going to find a lot of younger guys can't tell when a woman has makeup on... and certainly can't tell when they had plastic surgery. This takes experience.
Regarding the age thing... Men age slower that's a biological fact, however a lot of guys don't take care of themselves, so they look like shit. Still a man with wrinkles does look much better than a woman with the same. The reason is simple fertility. Anyone who doesn't realize this is dumb as hell. That's not to say there aren't some older women with wrinkles that look better than the young girls!
The virginity thing you are just quoting different guys or guys in different situations.
It's very easy for a woman to sleep around... it's god damned hard for a man to do the same. The amount of effort required in difference is insane... as is the quality requirement. Anyone who doesn't see this is fucking too dumb to be alive.
Men saying they prefer younger more inexperienced women... recognize this is a fantasy and that men will almost always take reality over fantasy when the meet it.
The sexual experience of a woman does not have much bearing on how they perform in bed. I've been with women who had 3 guys and were way, way better than women who had been with nearly 400. Most women suck at sex... FACT. They act like food critics at a Michelin star restaurant. They aren't fucking cooking here!
Sperm quality reduction is mostly a talking point for the most dipshit among the feminist set. Sperm have to run a marathon to work. Defective sperm don't make it... and there are millions of them.
It takes effort to approach AND men approach women of all levels of attractiveness. In fact men approach on a bell curve. Women do not reject on a bell curve... they reject anything below a certain level... and it's usually a high level.
Adriana Lima? Hard Pass!
These guys envision doing the manly stuff like car maintenance... building furniture and other handiwork. Also... I don't know any couple where the woman kicks in 50% of the income. It's usually 30% and below.
This is just stupid because I've never heard any man take this position openly. It's actually a standard female position... and excuse for cheating. "I was overworked", "He got boring"... ect.

Sutanrei · 2023-05-19T07:04:12+00:00

Cherry picked opinions Contradicting Very surprise

These kind of posts are pointless.

ThorLives · 2023-05-19T07:45:00+00:00

Some of these aren't contradictions or hypocritical, they're just different preferences. It's kind of obvious that men and women don't want the exact same things, but that doesn't make them hypocrites. They seemed like forced attempts to call out men as "hypocrites".

f) Men not conventionally attractive themselves, but wants a physically beautiful woman.

There's nothing wrong with an unattractive man wanting an attractive women, but if he's not attractive, he'd better be bringing something of value to the relationship. This might mean humor or money or whatever. But it's not contradictory for men to want this. On the flip side, women are constantly saying that women want a man with a sense of humor, but if she isn't funny, does this make it "contradictory" or hypocritical for her to want this? No, it does not.

g) Women who have wrinkles and grey hair are "hitting a brick wall", but men also have wrinkles and grey hair at the same age.

Women's beauty and men's handsomeness do not follow the same rules. If men don't like gray hair on women, and women don't mind gray hair on men, that's just different gender preferences. It's not contradictory.

A gender-flipped example is that women want tall men, but they aren't tall themselves. Does this make women hypocrites or "contradictory"? No.

Some of these are just things that petty or inexperienced men say, and it's somehow generalized into most men wanting these things.

DerayRevan · 2023-05-19T04:52:36+00:00

Alright fellas imma defend yall here

5: even if there's plenty of 30+ women out there, it's still a preference to date younger women

Younger women tend to be more available and interesting/fun to be around for a lot of guys

Fertility,inexperienced,youthfulness are just the benefits

8: ahhhhh no, we are talking about the Gold-diggers when mentioning shallowness

10: l don't want my woman to contribute any percentage of the income, same with many traditional conservative men

Anyways what hypocrisy ? Aren't women here always saying they differ as individuals and want different things in men, well this is the exact same case

Active-Razzmatazz-86 · 2023-05-19T06:57:34+00:00

Regarding 4 th point a man who is a virgin is a loser while a women who is a virgin is deemed most desirable .Men are shamed for being virgin by women and women is shamed for being high n count by me

5 it's almost impossible to find a older inexperienced women .Women have it super easy in dating and start dating from very young age and have lots lots of baggage

6 no one expects that

Regarding 8th point even ugly women get approached a lot but if they expect only handsome men to approach her then she has another thing coming

SecondEldenLord · 2023-05-19T07:33:26+00:00

Men do prefer natural women, women are the ones who keep pushing this whole idea of plastic surgery and makeup because of competition. And even though men do prefer having a physically attractive gf, it is not a must for them, but for women however a man being physically attractive is a must.
If a man is chirstian and really appreciates a woman's virginity, he will not mind for her keeping her virginity for marriage, chads however, won't have the patience.
Literally men don't say that because she has sex many times with one guy, but because she sleeps with many different guys of different sizes and this is a code for saying she is a hoe.
Men and women play by different rules. Getting sex for women is super easy, for all shapes and sizes. For men however, especially the average men, is super hard. There was a statistic released by OkCupid that average women has the same sexual pull as the most attractive guy. And people generally admire and appreciate great effort. If an average woman sleep with 5 different guys in one week, no one is surprised, but if a guy who looks like the biggest nerd in the world sleeps with 5 women, people are impressed and shocked and are like "how you did thath?Teach me!". Also, only desperate chads say she is frigid is she doesn't put out, only real men appreciate a woman who is not easy.
We are not talking about rare exceptions, we are talking about biological facts. After the age of 30, 90% of her eggs are dying and it is not only harder to have a baby, but the baby can also be born with complications as well. And yeah, there are many young women who are already sluts at 20, but those things don't happen that often.
Literally no real man has this expectancy, a man would happily teach a virgin how to fuck
Men can still have healthy children in their 30s and 40s, women however are on a clock, it is pure biology and science, get over it.
Yes, both are shallow if they reject each other for their looks
Don't know who that is but if you are talking about some super attractive model like woman, then yeah, men would make an exception for such a highly attractive woman but generally speaking, men do not prefer older women with kids, they are not attracted by the idea of raising someone's elses child
No, either a wife contributes just with all the house chores and the man is the sole provider and bread winner or they all split the house chorse.
There is never an excuse to cheat, for men or women, and women are generally the ones who find excuses to cheat.
Men don't care about a woman's career at all!

Overall, all you did was mentioning things only delusional and beta males think. Those are not real men.

katyushas_boyfriend · 2023-05-19T07:35:55+00:00

I see these kinds of self-contradicting comments a lot on social media. It's very confusing.

Do you think men are a hivemind? Is it the same men saying these things?

"I like natural women" to some women wearing makeup, but also...

Men are bad at telling when a woman is wearing makeup, and often think a woman wearing light natural-looking makeup is wearing no wakeup. This leads men to greatly overestimate female beauty.

"Take her swimming on the first date" to less conventionally attractive women who are trying to look and feel pretty.

This doesn't really contradict anything else you listed.

Men not conventionally attractive themselves, but wants a physically beautiful woman.

I don't see this is hypocrisy, is a woman a hypocritical for wanting a man with a larger penis despite the fact that she has no penis?

At any rate women are far more selective than men are and it's more common for them focus on the most attractive men than vice versa. Average/ugly women get far more attention than average/ugly men.

Women who have wrinkles and grey hair are "hitting a brick wall", but men also have wrinkles and grey hair at the same age.

Women's skin tends to physically age worse than men's due to a number of biological factors, and at the end of the day women have a weaker preference for youthfulness than men.

If a man sleeps with many women, he's alpha, but if a woman sleeps with many men, she's a slut.

Promiscuity is an indicator of desirability for men, not for women.

Women who have wrinkles and grey hair are "hitting a brick wall", but men also have wrinkles and grey hair at the same age.

What? Literally who says this? Can you give a singular example?

Wouldn't date an older woman who is divorced and has children, but would if it was someone like Adriana Lima, for example.

Adriana Lima is exceptional. You're not like her and never will be.

Men saying they prefer younger women because they're less experienced, youthful and more fertile. But there's plenty of less experienced women, youthful, fertile 30-something year olds, and more experienced, older-looking, infertile younger women.

Younger women are usually far more youthful-looking and fertile than older women, this isn't hard to understand.

puddingbike · 2023-05-19T07:37:04+00:00

I'm impressed with the systematic approach in this post. With that said, a response to this has a danger of running 50,000 words.

Your general point is correct that there is hypocrisy among some men. The qualifier "some" is doing a lot of work in your post, though. We could also say that there are lots of men who don't believe those things.

For instance:

"You're ugly" to some women who aren't wearing makeup.

Yes, I'm told that there are some men who say things like that. Well, commenting on appearance in that manner sickens me. And, I don't believe most men are telling women they're ugly.

Guilty-Instruction60 · 2023-05-19T07:39:17+00:00

some of these like the double standards, it is perfectly valid. Men and women are different, why does everything have to be symmetrical? Who made this rule

women have their own double standards too. For example wanting a tall man yet they are not tall themselves. Wanting a guy to be funny, yet not funny themselves, and i could go on and on.

Men and women value different things.

Teflon08191 · 2023-05-19T07:50:57+00:00

To answer all of the questions in one go before the thread gets locked: Obviously an amalgamation of various different opinions you've heard on the internet that you mashed together are going to seem contradictory.

Notanothrshitthrow · 2023-05-19T08:21:52+00:00

Can't really comment any further than yes, a lot of men are hypocritical.

StaticNocturne · 2023-05-19T08:34:52+00:00

Some men are shameless hypocrites.

And as far as I care I'm the only one who's allowed to be a hypocrite

Dark_Knight2000 · 2023-05-19T08:43:12+00:00

There are definitely a lot of reasons that broken men say those things. I think a large portion of that comes from bitterness.

It’s the reason why you see a significant portion of guys renounce the red pill and other associated concepts the moment a girl they like is genuinely nice to them, puts in effort, and he ends up in a relationships. It breaks every preconceived notion they have about women.

The reason you get so many bitter guys is that there’s a lot of guys who aren’t able to get anything sexual or romantic even when they put in effort and time and energy. Having their stupid optimism crushed over and over again. Hence

Guys tend to conform to whatever girls want (or more realistically what they think they want) to get attention and love. If women are in to casual sex, then he might have the opportunity to have casual sex. If they only want relationships, then he only wants relationships too, because that’s the only way he can get any attention from any woman.

If they reject him for his looks then he’s out of luck, if they reject him for his personality, then he tries to change his personality. Then he goes online, red pill, Jordan Peterson, manosphere, reddit… he’s inundated with hundreds of weird explanations of why he’s unsuccessful. It’s wild.

Every approach for a man has an emotional cost. I define “approach” as the first signs romantic interest (flirting, asking her out, etc). Therefore most men relegate themselves to only approaching the women they find immediately attractive because if he approached a woman he didn’t find immediately attractive (ie lower his standards), not only would he still have paid the same emotional cost, but now he has to see if he will become attracted to her long term. It’s another hurdle.

It’s easier for any person to start liking someone else after the other person showed them romantic interest. Platonically you like someone who likes you. A lot of men would consider dating a woman they didn’t find instantly bombshell hot if she showed romantic interest in him. Men would stop being “superficial.” But very few men get clearly approached more than once or twice in their entire lives.

Some bitter men miss out on dating during their younger years and they want to date younger women who would be likely more open to new experiences, adventure, and exploration. This is a generalization but it’s harder and harder to find people with youthful personalities once you get older. It hard to live the fun “teenage dream” romance with someone who’s already experienced all of that and isn’t really into that any more.

Cheesy dates, awkward kisses, exploring the opposite sex’s body with genuine curiosity, driving to nowhere at midnight, taking surprise 6000 mile road trips, staying in cheap motels, having ridiculous amounts of sex, doing naughty things in risky places like inside a car, or on the last row of the movie theatre in the dark.

Older people could do some of this. But it’s less likely they’ll be up for it or enthusiastic about it. They tend to suggest comfy movie nights, going to formal events, and generally more normal, adult dates.

In the end people just want to feel like they’re desirable, like they’re special to someone. They want to have all the fun, young, crazy experiences they hear about on social media (Reddit is full of them).

They don’t want to feel like someone’s last choice, or someone’s backup pick. The person you desired spent a few decades having fun with other people and only called up on you because they needed a stable partner and have now seen “the error of their ways” and go for “personality over looks” or whatever excuse they make up to justify how they acted when they were young.

What a lot of guys fail to understand is the inverse too. In modern dating culture, a lot of people including tons of women, feel like a “backup pick.” If a guy would sleep with anyone with a vagina, and only picked her because she was available and said yes, yeah that feels awful and sad.

Being encouraged to never settle (seriously that’s such a dumb phrase, people are human beings not OnePlus smartphones), and go for the “best picks” instead of just someone they could love, and would like to be loved by, even if they’re not the “perfect” partner.

The worst part of the abundance mindset “there could always be a better partner,” leads into the worst of the scarcity mindset “I’m running out of time, if he/she’s my only romantic option I’ll take them” combine to produce some of the most toxic thinking that destroys your self esteem and others.

That’s why guys act like losers. It’s because your mind will come up with any explanation possible to explain your lack of success. They’ll blame themselves (I wasn’t chad enough) and everyone else (all women are x), instead of just being content with nothing and accepting the random unfairness of life.

anonymous375555 · 2023-05-19T08:53:09+00:00

Because you are listening to all men, all men don’t agree on everything, if you listened to one man you wouldn’t find contradictions

DickTurtle1804 · 2023-05-19T08:54:30+00:00

I have a friend (28F) when she makes an effort and puts on make up and does her hair nice her boyfriend gets all offensive asking who she's dressing up for and who is she trying to impress. When she just lounges around in her PJs no make up hair craped back he says she looks like a boy. Poor girl..she deserves better.

Scandi_Navy · 2023-05-19T09:23:10+00:00

1 abcde: Men put women into two categories; wives worth investing in, and just casual sex. If you are not having kids with her, the face paint will substitute lack of real attraction just fine.

1 f: Men generally have to bring more to the table than women, which raises their value.

1 g: Women are welcome to date young looking men, with young skin, no experience, no achievement, no maturity.. but they don't do they? That's because men and women like different things. Manliness takes years of testosterone exposure and physical labor/training, life experience, work skills, etc. Where as women have the most of what men are attracted to around age 23, when they are physically developed and at peak fertility. We are not the same.

2 ab: These seemingly conflicting statements are made by different men. One man who sees her as wife material, the other just wants casual from her without investing.

3 + 4: Yes, but this looseness does not actually refer to her physical tightness but to her loose morals, self worth, standards. As she is painting herself more and more in the casual sex category to more and more men. Calling women frigid is manipulation by men who want casual sex.

5: In general younger is the best bet. But I'm sure men will give women a shot if they hear who she is.

6: Men have no such expectations, are willing to teach what they like, and do most of the work. Men can have good sex with inexperienced women. The other way around might also be true, but women don't want to teach, they just want to enjoy. That's women's own problem.

7: Older eggs give children more problem than older sperm. Throughout history most children were fathered by older men. In fact it's one of the reason why humans become older and older every generation.

8: You are right that in a way that is hypocrisy. The issue is that men are not evolved to be pretty. Tanks are not Ferraris. Yet you are happy to enjoy your freedom and fun behind a line of those tanks. You enjoy having running water, power, gas in your car, etc.

9: Women may be prettier than men, but by definition most women have an average level of beauty compared to all the other women. The women that are exceptionally beautiful can get away with more other negatives.

10: Well this does differ from man to man. But her income is generally not a factor in his partner choice. Many couples do end up having similar income or work field, why? Because women seek that out. For him it was just proximity. She was there, hot, and available.

11: Hobbies are not relevant. But the rest is true for most men. Here is why, that is what they seek, that is what you bring to the table. You want to work, that's fine, but nobody asked you to. Let's flip the script; I as a man now bring bottle feeding to the table, so now I no longer have to provide. And you will say that you never asked me to bring that to the table because your breasts work fine. I can not force you to value something you are not looking for.

12: That's dumb. Although being able to support yourself when single is something you do for yourself, and education is good for your personal development.

Reptheft · 2023-05-19T09:37:03+00:00

f) Men not conventionally attractive themselves, but wants a physically beautiful woman.

That one's simple, relatively little is asked of women in the initial stages of dating besides looks. So there's a heightened focus given to them.

Whereas women aren't just looking for looks, they also want a man who's assertive, pays for stuff, and gives the impression of being strong. If a guy is bringing a combination of all these traits to the table, he's gonna feel like he's earned the opportunity to go for physically attractive women.

4) a) If a man sleeps with many women, he's alpha, but if a woman sleeps with many men, she's a slut.

Most women can sleep with a bunch of men, only a few men can sleep with a bunch of women. It's simply down to how rare the ability is.

5) Men saying they prefer younger women because they're less experienced, youthful and more fertile. But there's plenty of less experienced women, youthful, fertile 30-something year olds, and more experienced, older-looking, infertile younger women.

It's difficult to find women who are exceptions to a trend. Since men are usually the ones putting in the work to seek out women, instead of the other way around, they're gonna rely on statistical likelihoods rather than holding out for an inexperienced 30 year old unicorn.

8) Women are shallow if they reject a man for his appearance... but is he not shallow for approaching her because of her looks?

There isn't really an alternative. If a guy waits until he's gotten to know the woman's personality before he asks her out, the window to make a move has often closed (hence the term "friendzone"). Guys are usually expected to make their attraction known quickly.

9) Wouldn't date an older woman who is divorced and has children, but would if it was someone like Adriana Lima, for example.

Adriana Lima probably won't be reliant on her partners for financial support.

Mrs_Drgree · 2023-05-19T09:55:13+00:00

Removed for bad faith

Title	Can men here comment on these hypocrisies some men say about women?
Author	calmyourtitspls
Upvotes	17
Comments	106
Date	May 19, 2023 4:38 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/13ll3yb/can_men_here_comment_on_these_hypocrisies_some/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/can-men-here-comment-on-these-hypocrisies-some-men.1219725 https://theredarchive.com/post/1219725

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