Do you consider yourself easy to attract? How easy is it for someone to pull you?

ChancyChancery · 2022-06-21T21:12:39+00:00

I may not be attracted to someone physically right away, but the more I talk to that person and we vibe, the more I like them no matter what they look like. Like I had the exterminator come and the guy was a normal looking dude in his 40s. But he was friendly and genuine and we started chatting about topics im interested in and all of a sudden I was like oh...I'm attracted to him.

I've been attracted to people based on what they look like but then I end up not vibing, and then I don't even think about them.

I'm also attracted to people who are nice and give me attention, because it's rare, so idk what that says about me. Cue all my confused crushes on my best girl friends lol.

kalashhhhhhhh · 2022-06-21T23:59:05+00:00

I'm not attracted to anyone based solely on physical apperance, but I could be attracted to almost any normal looking dude (not fat, not deformed, my age, not bald) if they are charismatic enough (funny, eloquent, holds interesting conversation, similar interests and outlooks on life, smart) and I am in a time and place where I'd be down to develop something with him (not taken, in an appropriate state of mind). Idk if that's easy to attract haha I mostly developed a crush after getting to know a guy better, in class or a friend group.

throwawaylessons103 · 2022-06-21T21:35:52+00:00

If the guy is my type physically, pretty easy. He can still ruin it with an awkward/"off" personality though.

If I'm neutral, it's a lot harder. But it has happened.

If I'm unattracted, impossible.

rain243 · 2022-06-21T21:37:23+00:00

My standards are: be in shape, be loyal, be younger than me, be generally pleasant to be around. They're completely attainable by almost anyone (assuming age requirement is met) but still eliminate about 90% of women in my country lmao

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-06-21T21:47:57+00:00

No because I only date up & also you gotta deal with me repeating the same 10 jokes over and over

2022-06-21T22:30:35+00:00

nearly impossible, If someone approaches me at a party and I think they are cute I will chat and be enthusiastic but I wont be physically attracted to them in that moment and I certainly wont make out or go home with them that night. I'm just opening up the possibility of making a new friend/romantic interest.

Pretty much all of my crushes/romances have been subtly initiated by me. I'm friends with someone/work with someone then i realize i have a crush and start dropping hints/making excuses to be around them. Im really easy to scare off unfortunately.

SignalThanks6766 · 2022-06-21T21:04:42+00:00

Very much so. I fin me average looking people attractive and as long as someone can hold a conversation, I’ll say yes to being asked out. This is why I have been in a relationship 12/13 years of my adult life.

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-06-21T21:26:47+00:00

Extremely difficult. I'm a challenge.

YaKnowEstacado · 2022-06-21T21:37:22+00:00

I think it's difficult, not because of my standards per se but because I am a very shy/nervous/guarded person until I get to know someone.

briiiana1122 · 2022-06-21T22:16:40+00:00

I’m approachable and friendly and I don’t make men I’m interested in jump through elaborate hoops, if that’s what you mean.

I wouldn’t say I have low standards, certainly I wouldn’t just take whatever I can get. I was always looking for my equal (in career, finances, personality, looks) so that’s the bar to me. I’ve never had any issue getting into a relationship, if anything I’ve had to be careful because men have wanted relationships before I was ready and I didn’t want to mislead.

None0fYour8usiness · 2022-06-22T11:34:41+00:00

Oh yes.

A girl that's not morbidly obese and has a cute face? It's a yes from me.

Shares hobbies with me? I'm falling in love already.

Our personalities don't clash? I'm imagining an entire life for us.

Mostly joking, but it's incredibly easy to attract me. I wouldn't say it's because y standards are low, but rather diverse. I just find women attractive. Well most of them.

FancyComfortable4678 · 2022-06-21T21:05:19+00:00

I’m a guy and I’d say yes and no. Like a lot from we say, If im attracted to her, it’s ridiculously easy. If im not, there’s pretty much nothing she can do. Not that it’s ever happened that girl I was attracted to made a move on men.

I think this is different for most women because they will have a non-zero number of guys who they are attracted to make a move on them, so they can afford to make it difficult for those guys if they want to

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ashpr0ulx · 2022-06-21T21:07:20+00:00

i think it’s moderately easy to pull me for sex if i’m single/doing the casual thing, much harder to pull me for a relationship.

Apprehensive_Boat_70 · 2022-06-21T22:12:36+00:00

Idk how to explain it, im not one that falls at first sight, however convos with me are relaxing and things flow, i dont control if i fall for someone or not, but when a woman that likes me talks with she doesnt has to walk on eggshells nor lose her dignity for me to like her, not that that would charm me anyways

2022-06-21T22:21:10+00:00

The only time someone tried to attract me I fell into a relationship simply because I'm a people pleaser. So in that sense I guess I can be pretty easy. But I actually think it is pretty rare for me to genuinely want to have a relationship with someone. Nowadays I don't think it'd be possible for someone to "pull" me.

Coolio_Street_Racer · 2022-06-21T22:22:55+00:00

Now, definitely not. Atleast for a relationship.

1 year ago. I would have simped for any girl that was average looking and could hold a conversation.

What changed was I became more selfish after understanding how selfish women are. Which I'm not implying is wrong. Just the way the game is.

2022-06-21T22:32:09+00:00

I’m a woman with fairly low standards. I have no height preference, a very wide range of body preferences, no strong feelings about age, income, personality, really anything else. Maybe 2-3 dealbreakers in terms of personal values. But I could get along with anyone pretty well. That being said, I’m incredibly shy, and if a man ever approached me, I don’t think he would have an easy time getting me to talk. I would also likely assume he was just being a wingman or pitying me.

So I guess all things considered, it’s not easy for someone to pull me, but it’s definitely not a matter of crazy standards or being difficult to attract.

Complex-Glass-8539 · 2022-06-21T22:55:19+00:00

For sex, I’m an easy pull, if the situation is right at least as long as you are the very low end of overweight to healthy weight. Underweight and obese is just not my thing.

Also, don’t have crazy eyes and a really anxious personality, I’ve got no time for a girl who thinks I’m her future husband because I made you cum.

Orange_Paisley · 2022-06-21T23:07:55+00:00

More so now that I am older, I think. Maybe because when I was younger and seeking a long term relationship. I viewed people with a more critical eye (do I want to be stuck with this person for any length of time?) whereas now I am older, married, and can appreciate someone being attractive without caring if it would ever go anywhere.

chalkandapples · 2022-06-21T23:09:16+00:00

I'm hard to attract romantically, but it's not going to be hard to talk to me or to approach. It's just hard for me to accept someone as a romantic partner, a lot of things have to match up. It took me 2 years to find 1 boyfriend.

sarkington · 2022-06-21T23:21:46+00:00

Sure

Not offending me is the hard part

EulenWatcher · 2022-06-22T00:17:36+00:00

I extremely rarely develop romantic attraction. I'm in my middle 20s and I've been attracted/just romantically curious about 7 people maybe. And it's gone even lower since I've met my husband at 16. Since 16 besides him I've ever got romantic attraction only to one person and she's my friend and it was extremely fleeting.

I do have high standards I guess, but I'm not sure they really affect the way attraction works for me. I have to know a person somewhat and be/feel like we could friends. Considering I don't have a huge social circle and I rarely meet people I could become friends with, it's no wonder I don't generally don't develop attraction to most.

SuperBodybuilder7405 · 2022-06-22T01:30:56+00:00

Depends, I'm very rarely attracted to someone purely for physical appearance. Almost never happens. Once I start talking to a girl or think she has some interest then it's not that hard for me to have some attraction but pretty rare to have it to the level where I want to pursue her.

cloudydays84 · 2022-06-22T02:07:25+00:00

I think of myself as pretty open and approachable in a general sense. So I don't think most people would have a hard time just approaching me. Now depending on what they want it'll be different.

For sex, pretty easy. If I'm attracted to you and I don't notice any red flags or issues, I probably won't be down to fuck on the spot but I won't be the toughest nut to crack.

For relationships... yeah you'd have an easier time trying to mow a lawn evenly with a pair of nail clippers.

Hard_Corsair · 2022-06-22T02:22:55+00:00

Eh, hard to say. Physically, I’m not hard to please. I’m less hung up on looks than most men. However, I have an eccentric personality and I’m a human lie detector, so a lot of people aren’t compatible with me.

CurrycelNumeroUno · 2022-06-22T02:28:30+00:00

Look at me Exist

ohdiddly · 2022-06-22T03:03:37+00:00

Probably not. Unless if you’re a hot nerdy gamer dude then yes, it’s easy.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-06-22T03:07:17+00:00

Physically I'm pretty easy for the good portion of women good body and a decent face and I'll at least be curious, relationship-wise is a completely different story lol

webernicke · 2022-06-22T04:02:26+00:00

Yes, I'm an attention/flattery whore that reflects attraction.

Whoever wants me will have to take the lead though, since I'm extremely passive.

I used not be easy at all. Then I realized how much better I am "fishing" instead of "hunting" and leaned into that.

Time_Animaal · 2022-06-22T06:04:58+00:00

Despite thinking I'm a somewhat low value man (maybe 45th percentile?), I really wouldn't want to be around most women long term. I have an aspergers diagnosis and really need my space and don't click with almost all people.

I bet you if some 'Stacey's I could think of actively pursued me.....I don't know. A couple of the more attractive girls at work, I work in a relatively prestigious job, like 80th-90th percentile prestige, are extremely conscientious, which is a personality trait that essentially means regimented and disciplined. I am very low in conscientiousness (this is an actual psychometric trait) - and can be messy and very lazy about things I don't care about. I think on some big V personality traits opposites may indeed attract (Extraversion, Neuroticism, Agreeableness) but on others (Openness, Conscientiousness) you want a partner who is about the same level as you.

And truthfully middle-and low IQ girls I think I could just never, ever, ever spend extended amounts of time with. I think IQ is a much stronger mating pull than most people on here realize, maybe 2nd next to attractiveness. I think everyone below 70th percentile in IQ my answer is just no to anything long term. I think I'm in the 90th-97th IQ range. I think dumber people I'm just never going to get on the same wavelength as excepting on specific topics like sports. Though..this might all not be too worth mentioning because if like IQ people choose like IQ people it doesn't matter as the dating pools are the same if the preference is the same. However since women are hypergamous, this is actually one of my benefits as presumably I'm more willing to bend on this than women are. However I think aspergers makes this harder, and it's downright impossible to talk to people below average IQ and hard to talk to people at average/a little above average.

I also don't think I could get along with someone that was too normie, and would similarly be a bad partner for them.

urbangoth · 2022-06-22T07:18:12+00:00

I think I'm decent to approach, because I've had a fair amount of people do so, so I can't be that off-putting. I engage easily because I'm always curious, but am just as easily off put if someone has values that are anathema to me. (For example, I will immediately disengage with religious or conservative folk because it's a slim chance I'll actually enjoy them as a person) I'm extremely choosy on who I will continue to interact with because I'm generally an introvert; part of what factors into it is how well the person can ping-pong a conversation with me, if they're intellectually stimulating, and if they present well (are they well-groomed, intelligent, stylish, well-spoken, friendly? Are they goofy, irreverent, and witty? Not all are required, but these types of traits are what make me want to be around someone). For anything intimate, I am very picky and have a preference toward specific body types and personalities; it will almost always be a no-go if someone cannot pass that threshold and then prove they have a compatible personality unless I somehow happen to know them long term and a relationship/attraction were to develop over time.

gmanex · 2022-06-22T07:41:13+00:00

Tie a skirt around a rock and I'm in

Substantial_Video560 · 2022-06-22T09:43:48+00:00

Gay guys are often attracted to me. I get a lot of that online and in person. Being a straight hetrosexual male I politely turn them down.

I rarely get women giving me interest nowadays, only fakes on Instagram which I always block and delete.

KindnessIsAMask · 2022-06-22T10:12:03+00:00

Why would I tell you? 😆

Are you tall, lean and visible cheekbones? Unless, nah

AelfredRex · 2022-06-22T11:34:52+00:00

Depends. Is she married? Is she gonna be clingy? Is she psycho? Questions must be asked.

figuringMylife · 2022-06-22T12:00:39+00:00

i’m easy when i’m not infatuated with anyone. i like most humans

Beenixwinterberry · 2022-06-22T13:43:46+00:00

No

… and sadly I don’t find most men where I live attractive. That’s probably largely based on where I live however, and ethnicity, in other places I find more men attractive. Sharp and somewhat disagreeable facial features and fit or lean. Not model features/pretty boy. Like, in Sweden meh. In eastern Germany and further south of that, more of men are attractive.

That however is not enough and he needs to have a nice personality, and show a lot of interest and commitment. Without that a ”hot” guy becomes ugly to me. Commitment doesn’t mean only being in a relationship, but like, ”we are in this for life”, marriage essentially. Heavily pursuing. What my parents had where my dad moved country for my mum and was the provider. (And no not some beta blabla my mum said the first impression of my dad was ”butterflies” and this was why she bargained so much lol). Personality is a lot about ”connecting” not neccesarily a set of traits but I value holding intellectual discussions, humour etc. Being kind is a prerequisite as well. I also want us to feel like we understand each other.

Common interests. Common basic values.

Oh and the Guy has to be really into me.

No, I am hard to attract. This is not only to consider to date because if I don’t see a guy as date material I don’t really fully get attracted beyond ”kinda hot”.

feminologie_ · 2022-06-22T21:04:21+00:00

I have a hard time being attracted to someone based on looks only. I have bare minimum standards for looks, like have good hygiene, be in shape, wear decent clothes, be taller/stronger than me, don't repulse me. I would say the average guy can easily meet those standards.

My issue is looks aren't enough. For me to be sexually/romantically attracted to a man, he has to meet the minimum looks requirement AND have a fascinating personality. I am a sucker for certain qualities like intelligence, confidence, humor, kindness, empathy, self-discipline, respect, assertiveness, decisiveness.

A love it when a man can have deep conversations about complicated topics without being an arrogant know-it-all prick. When he can make me laugh hysterically without being vulgar or mean. When he respects himself, lives by his own values, and doesn't put me on a pedestal. When he treats me kindly because he's a kind person who has a heart, not because he's trying to get something from me specifically. When he sees me as a human being and not a sex doll, a slave, or something to be conquered. When he has a plan for his life, a purpose, and actively works for it.

A man like this is everything. I would put in 110% effort for a man like this. He can be perfectly average in everything else (looks, money, education, status) but if the personality, emotional intelligence and character is on point, my attraction would be off the charts.

I actually met someone like this before but we didn't date because he didn't see me that way. I was insanely attracted to him though. (Even though he was a broke college student at the time, and "only" 5'8 so according to red pill I could never be attracted to him). I got to know him in college and he had the most wonderful personality. Our chemistry was perfect. Literally he used to just look at me and I would feel my insides melting. I never knew I could be so attracted to someone. He had all the qualities I mentioned.

Perseus_the_Bold · 2022-06-22T21:40:30+00:00

As a man I am very easy to attract.

As a MGTOW I am impossible to impress.

I have no standards because the answer is always no.

reignoferror00 · 2022-06-22T23:43:21+00:00

Standards are probably below average. Average to overweight to a bit obese woman is good. Stick thin or a SSBBW not so much. Age range quite wide open - from about a decade and a half younger to a decade older (I'm a middle aged guy); what little interest I get almost certainly won't be from the extreme end of this in either direction.

Showing a bit of attraction and being friendly gains you many points in attractiveness. Showing a lot of attraction would likely at least temporarily drop most of my standards to the floor, but would put my radar up for this being some kind of a setup or joke on me.

Anything beyond short term and me wanting to spend any significant time with them shoots my standards way up - almost to "decent competent human" - lets go with 'fairly decent semi-competent human'.

Outrageous_Carpet933 · 2022-06-22T23:58:25+00:00

I have high standards. there are a lot of people that I think are beautiful but their personality is highly annoying so this is a reason why it's not easy to pull me off

Katatonicsnake · 2022-06-23T08:40:43+00:00

No. I rarely feel attracted to anyone. My vibe is contradictory to many. I smile a lot and try to make people feel comfortable, but I’m not afraid to say what I think. Makes it difficult to find friends.

I don’t consider my standards too high, but I guess they are higher than most people’s. Doesn’t matter to me, I’m not interested in getting to know most people. Only one man has really managed to pull me like that, and we are still together.

Anti_Thing · 2022-06-29T19:56:08+00:00

I'm easy to attract, but for a girl to actually date me they need to meet religious & political standards that almost nobody (especially not young, attractive, educated, urban/suburban, Canadian women) meets.

I don't believe in sex outside of marriage, so in that sense I'm impossible to "pull". (Being against sex outside of marriage happens to be one of my standards).

I definitely have high standards, though due to my strongly held beliefs I see no other option. I compensate by having lower standards in other areas. Whereas some guys want a woman with specific hobbies, a specific personality, or a very specific physical appearance, I'm down to date just about any woman who shares my worldview & whom I find physically attractive.

Title	Do you consider yourself easy to attract? How easy is it for someone to pull you?
Author	brilliant22
Upvotes	10
Comments	56
Date	June 21, 2022 9:00 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/vhngr3/do_you_consider_yourself_easy_to_attract_how_easy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-you-consider-yourself-easy-to-attract-how-easy.1120533 https://theredarchive.com/post/1120533

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