Why are people (mostly men) obsessed with relationships/sex/gender?

k0unitX · 2024-06-20T02:25:33+00:00

The fact that someone like OP genuinely could not comprehend why men need to care much more than women is half of the problem

toasterchild · 2024-06-20T01:47:46+00:00

I swear tinder ruined everything

IronDBZ · 2024-06-20T01:29:03+00:00

Men are the demographic least capable of ignoring issues in dating/gender relations. We're the canaries.

Men are sensitive to these things for a lot of reasons, but the short of it is that our quality of life is lot more intertwined with the concept of romantic relationships than women's are. Women always have each other, whether they want a relationship or not, there's always a place for them among other women.

Women are the connective tissue of society, they're far more likely to have expansive networks of friends and acquaintances, they're closer to their families, they're generally more trusted and people aren't as quick to ostracize them. They just don't need romance the way men do.

A man's viability in society comes down to the relationships he can hold onto. That means dealing with women for most men. Unless you've got money and talk to other men with money, there's not a lot you're going to get from purely male community long term. (Speaking as a non-gay man who isn't in queer spaces)

Women mean a future. Whether that's role to play or connection with others, they're really the gatekeepers of the social sphere.

And when women turn inward, social dysfunction starts. But women only notice the problems when it interrupts their lives.

For a lot of guys, there is no life if there are no women around, certainly not a very productive or satisfying one. It's the same for women, but they don't notice as much because they're mostly always welcome in women's spaces. It takes a lot to ice them out of community.

HolidayWhile · 2024-06-20T00:48:33+00:00

Only men face romantic scarcity at a level never before seen.

Hot_Lack_4868 · 2024-06-20T01:26:10+00:00

Because it is something which is increasingly becoming hard for men to get when they are young and most horny

DivideOk2944 · 2024-06-20T05:40:44+00:00

As a man you have a very high libido that is pretty much never fulfilled due to lack of options. And women think when I say lack of options is like “oh a few girls want you blah blah” nope, most men have absolutely no options. I’ve know plenty of men who were perfectly normal, decent looking etc, had jobs but literally absolutely no one wanted them. Women can’t fathom this. They always say the guy must be doing something wrong 😂😂😂 that’s how inconceivable it is to them. On top of that no one actually cares about you enough to care what’s going on with you. These are just the most basic ways to put it.

shestammie · 2024-06-20T00:51:41+00:00

1) men place a lot of value on whether they’re dating or having sex with attractive women. Starts just before high school and lasts a big chunk of their life. A lot of social ostracizing happens to men who can’t find connection with the opposite sex. There’s a lot of fear and shame in virginity - reinforced by other men and women. Think about how popular insults to men are related to a lack of sexual success (small dick, incel etc)

2) social media is a cesspit of men and women putting each other down and getting steadily angrier about it. Any man who’s posted a nasty Tweet will point to a woman who’s done the same. It’s cyclical and makes people retreat to online communities where no one attacks their identity and talking smack about the other gender is encouraged.

DecisionPlastic9740 · 2024-06-20T04:05:00+00:00

Because most men have a scarcity of options my brother.

Foxy_Traine · 2024-06-20T10:36:38+00:00

I think men are unable to get their emotional needs met with relationships that aren't sexual/romantic in nature. Male friendships aren't emotionally supportive the way female friendships are, so men seek women out more because they need more emotional support and can't find it another way.

If men were able to build and maintain other healthy relationships, I don't think this obsession would be as prominent. Plus, putting all your emotional needs into your romantic partner is really unfair to do to women and is one reason why women don't want to have romantic relationships with many men.

Ayaka_Simp_ · 2024-06-20T01:37:32+00:00

There was never a point in history where men didn't care about body count. What planet are you living on OP?

NoFapGymColdShowers · 2024-06-20T01:29:52+00:00

1-we have higher libidos. 2-social media/dating apps blowing up messed up gender dynamics

one_ball_policy · 2024-06-20T07:23:01+00:00

I think it’s quite obvious. The less access that young men have to sex the greater the obsession. As far as this not being in the online discussion, I remember reading about game and redpill in early 2010’s. It’s not new, it’s just become more popular, probably because more men struggle with women. Loser men are lonely, loneliness is depressing. They don’t wanna be depressed

Men want women, if men can’t get women they adjust to figure out how. They find red pill. The online discourse used to be just explaining what the world is, but as it gets bigger more hateful people join. Can’t screen for everyone. (Kinda like feminism having a lot of man haters but that doesn’t mean all feminist are like that)

Also if being kind and respectful attracted women I promise you overnight all the redpill would switch its rhetoric to being kind and respectful towards woman lol.

DamagedByPessimism · 2024-06-20T03:41:41+00:00

Because women make men’s life better, more than the vice versa. Duh

For example: men that are taken are more likely to visit a doctor, thus being healthier, compared to celibates.

wtknight · 2024-06-20T12:24:14+00:00

I'm just curious as to why society has now become obsessed with issues that I don't think really matter in the real world.

They do matter. People ultimately want love, and not having sex is FOMO.

I think that discussion has increased because unsuccessful or less than successful men have figured out how to use the internet to congregate and share advice and stories. Women usually have had real life friend groups to do this with. Men either probably feel more comfortable sharing these things anonymously, or they don’t have the friend groups anymore that they used to.

KGmagic52 · 2024-06-20T14:00:31+00:00

Because men try to figure out women because they have the sex. Women don't bother trying to figure men out because they can turn on the sex to get men.

just_a_place · 2024-06-21T02:45:19+00:00

lol when the fuck did we become the ones obsessed with relationships?

Just because we're horny all the time it does not mean we give a fuck about relationships.

You are confusing the loud ass fringe group of incels on the internet, who screech with despair because no woman wants to have anything to do with them, as somehow being a representative sample for the majority of men.

SaBahRub · 2024-06-20T00:52:54+00:00

bloblikeseacreature · 2024-06-20T03:22:07+00:00

heterosexual relationships have historically been a kind of slavery and socially and psychologically a lot of how we understand them still carries over from that heritage.

one very interesting aspect of slavery is that a master needs a slave, but a slave does not need a master and is actually better off without one. a master loses their humanity by dehumanizing another and therefore denying humanity itself, but a slave merely endures dehumanization from the outside. a slave can move on easily and naturally when they are liberated, but a master will really struggle to survive and find any meaning or identity when they lose the status for which they sacrificed their humanity.

a lot of the coercion that ensures women are tied to men is gone now. men collectively are stuck processing. they have not yet collectively adapted and evolved (although many individuals always have). many still expect relationships with women in which they hold the upper hand and where they don't have to offer women more than in earlier times. many are finding those expectations aren't being met. some are ready to go to war to violently force time to turn back.

serpensmercurialis · 2024-06-20T02:42:52+00:00

It’s an easier social status gain than other achievements like a degree or high-paying job.

FirmQuarter6623 · 2024-06-20T12:27:14+00:00

I'm not obsessed with food. Why would I? I have my 3 meals a day. Guys who live in some African shithole probably wouldn't agree with me.

Still, I don't agree that men are obsessed about all of this more than women. Magazines for women with dating advices were popular long before RP.

New phases like 'SMV' have entered the lexicon to demean women

In order to talk about something without describing it for a 5 minute, we give names to things. You made it entirely about women, but it's just not true, men are participating in market too.

If men want to attract a women maybe be kind and respectful?

lol

A women isn't devalued if she has slept with 5+ men, she just is dating and seeing what is right for her. I haven't slept with that many people but I don't think I'm better than someone who has slept with 50+.

A woman with 50 bodies can have a value as specialist at work or something. Though, I think 50 bodycount is a sign that she has a mess in her head. As sexual being her value is low.

No_Matter_8648 · 2024-06-20T13:43:18+00:00

Is this pure shit post troll bait. Holy shit! Just put on your I’m a clown feminist shirt & be gone. Why is it popular? Cuz the levels of rejections rates women across the board are subjecting us to has never been this bad in the history of humanity. EVER!

Fertility rates lowest ever, marriage rates lowest ever, inflation rates highest ever. 70% of all men are single now. How the fuck do you not know this. Even the shill mainstream media is starting to notice & reporting on it. I dunno what else to tell you. Boomers are scared cuz the entire system is collapsing & the women just keep riding the CC until they are thrown off.

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Acco234 · 2024-06-20T00:48:40+00:00

Your observations are incomplete. Women are in fact more obsessed with this stuff. Men are reacting.

Expensive-Tea455 · 2024-06-22T02:45:46+00:00

Because they’re very desperate lol

Ultramega39 · 2024-06-20T03:08:42+00:00

Peer pressure.

Just look at the post earlier today about virginity and how people think that it's bad that men don't lose their virginity as soon as they reach adulthood,

. If men want to attract a women maybe be kind and respectful?

Ugh, this exact statement is part of the problem. It implies that only mean and rude men struggle with dating, which all know that isn't true, right? Why do you think that the phrase "nice guys finish last" exists? Why do you think that so many men complain about "bad boys getting all the women"? Maybe it's because men who are TOO nice and respectful will often get rejected or taken advantage of.

_jay_fox_ · 2024-06-20T12:42:09+00:00

Feminism.

And BTW I'm not against feminism, I just think we need some equivalent on the male side to balance things out. But apparently that makes me a fascist or something.

McPigg · 2024-07-17T18:57:30+00:00

Its one of the central things in a humans life, and its not "mostly men"

ExcelsiorState718 · 2024-06-20T04:32:14+00:00

The simple answer is men want sex exclusive sex...

Men are taught study get good grades go to college get a degree get a job get a car get a house be a provider be a gentleman and theyvwill get that but these days ..Men have to walk on the moon just to get laid...or be blessed with the looks of a Greek God or appeal to some other carnal nature of women.

And the bar is just getting higher and higher

Also there's a surplus of Men.men that would have died in a work place incident or a battle 50 or 100 years ago..so with the surpluses of men women can be ever more picky.Combined with feminist rights.

So all men can do is sit there and listen to how men are dogs men aren't sht, there aren't any good men men are abusive men are narcissist ...etc...and imagine being a man who hasn't been on a date in 3 years 5 years 10 years having to listen to this narrative all the time or imagine the divorced man who tried, who did his best loved his wife and kids worked hard to provide but it wasn't enough.

Women have left their husband's for serial killers teenage school boys other women and the list goes on.I watched a video of a woman getting married to man while he was in jail starting a 15 year sentence yet if a hard working man is balding or under 6' its a deal breaker.

Most men don't want to date or marry a woman that has slept around with many diffrent men. it shows lack of sexual dicipline and its a red flag..you really needed to have sex with 50 diffrent people how many abortions came with that. The mentality of a women that would do that disqualifies her for a wife .

Relationships are apart of life its like food water shelter humans have evolved to want relationships..I'd be willing to bet if most men could snap their fingers and not even care about women they would. but nature has cursed us with a deep care for women luckily by your 40s it starts to go away but for most guys it's to late by then they've allready made 100 bad decisions for a woman.

At this point nobody over 25 is obsessing over women or what they want we honestly don't even care we've decided women don't make any sense 90% of the time and at best we can encourage young men and boys not to waste time on them or make the mistakes we did..young men shouldn't be solely exposed to the one sided narrative that they aren't sht and they need therapy and they should marry single moms promiscuous women boss chicks and be her partner.

I still read about guys who can't decide whether to go to college, take a job offer stay for some girl or marry a single mom..I just convinced a friend to join the military and break up with his GF who was sending pictures to another guy.

So yes men are talking about it because women are talking about it but for the first time men can actually speak up even if they deplatform you throw you in jail like Andrew Tate or kill you like Kevin Samuels everything we do is just countering what women do. Remember brick girl who claimed no men helped her turned out to be a lie now shes wanted by the FBI...Remember bird call Karen who lied on a man in the park could have got him killed..he's doing well his show just got an Emmy.

I'm sure I'll be banned for this post but it is what it is

Wars mostly men died in.

Irish Rebellion (1798)

Quasi-War (1798-1800)

Invasion of France 1795 (1795)

French Revolutionary Wars (1792-1802)

Russo-Swedish War (1788-1790)

War of the Bavarian Succession (1778-1779)

American War of Independence (1775-1783)

First Anglo-Maratha War (1775-1782)

Partitions of Poland (1772-1795)

Russo-Turkish War (1768-1774)

Seven Years War (1756-1763)

French & Indian War (1754-1763)

King George's War (1744-1748)

Second Silesian War (1744-1745)

First Silesian War (1740-1742)

War of the Austrian Succession (1740-1748)

War of Jenkins Ear (1739-1748)

War of the Polish Succession (1733-1735)

War of the Quadruple Alliance (1718-1720)

Turkish Wars with Austria and Russia (1716-1791)

Russo-Ottoman War (1710-1711)

Wars and Conflicts in India (1704-1799)

War of Spanish Succession (1701-1714)

Great Northern War (1700-1721)

Jacobite Risings (1688-1746)

Jacobite Risings

Jacobite Rising of 1689

Jacobite Rising of 1715

Jacobite Rising of 1745

Williamite War in Ireland 1688-1691

Jacobite Rising of 171

And damn use some paragraph spacing.

Independent-Mail-227 · 2024-06-20T11:32:05+00:00

Why are poor people so obsessed with money?

Why is teenagers so obsessed with having a house?

Why are women so obsessed with appearing virtuous and moral?

You can only be obsessed with something you don't have.

Why can't we just get along? I have been assaulted too and harassed sexually at work, in night clubs, in public since I was 15 and I don't hate men

You want to know why we can't get along? Because women act like perpetual victims, PROVE THAT THOSE THINGS HAPPENED OR STOP USING THIS BULLSHIT AS AN ARGUMENT.

TheRedPillRipper · 2024-06-20T02:21:06+00:00

Why

Testosterone is a hell of a drug. From Puberty, Test is the primary driver for a myriad of physiological changes. A prime example being almost all guys will attest to that feeling, when they first started noticing girls in high school. The urges. The emotions. That is the core reason of why sex is commonly a big focal point for males.

As to why the dialogue has appeared to change, is because of change in the dissemination of information. It happens at light speed now. Men are hopefully wisening up now. Women are hopefully more discerning, whom they invest time in.

Godspeed and good luck!

TapZealousideal5974 · 2024-06-20T04:12:05+00:00

Being attractive or not as a man can have drastic consequences not just in dating but in the workplace and society more generally, especially as women are moving up in the world and more interview panels, HR, bosses etc. are women. Obviously it is important for women too, and women do care as much about gender stuff as men do, that's what feminism is after all.

The reason why men getting all neurotic and weird about this stuff is so obvious and jarring today is because in the past, men weren't like this as much. Women and sex were part of the private sphere.

Title	Why are people (mostly men) obsessed with relationships/sex/gender?
Author	forevermanc
Upvotes	0
Comments	86
Date	June 20, 2024 12:30 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1djylub/why_are_people_mostly_men_obsessed_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-are-people-mostly-men-obsessed-with.1522086 https://theredarchive.com/post/1522086

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