Women’s “types” when it comes to looks is almost entirely trend driven and they don’t even realize it

kalashhhhhhhh · 2022-10-08T08:44:31+00:00

You say this like having a big butt wasn't considered unattractive in the 80s

eth_trader_12 · 2022-10-08T09:45:21+00:00

This is long so apologies in advance:

Iliked these types when I was younger and still like them. I've always been into slim, feminine guys who have countercultural aesthetics or interests; they're cooler (to me) that those who do not have those traits. That doesn't mean those traits alone would carry someone. I've met plenty of ugly and foul people with piercings, who like dark music, and who are tall + skinny.

Don't act like society hasn't been pitching various "types" to everyone for decades. Guess what? Marketers know what people like (good looking people) then repeatedly show that to consumers to make money, sell products, give people complexes about their appearance, etc.

What we find attractive is influenced by environment and culture, yes, but most of the "types" marketed are just the repackaging of conventionally hot people into certain niches or aesthetics. Then the less conventionally hot people come into the niche as well and also gain appeal from it bc the niche is already associated with attractive people. They'll have little quirks that the conventionally hot people don't, but people will still like them anyway because of the niche + average-to-above-average appearance.

And then it tends to cycle. Hot people do one thing, then the average people, then the least attractive people who are trying to desperately get in on it, and then it sometimes "uncool" again. You see this with women's fashion trends a lot.

Basically, if there's hot people there, it will become desirable by proxy. If the hot people abandon the thing, it becomes less attractive unless someone has genuine interest in it. If a hot person has genuine interest in it, sometimes the hot people come back with them. It just cycles.

Having a type can work well. But the basis of being op to some people is to be above-average in attractiveness and then have a niche on top of it. And to of course have genuine interest in the niche. You'll basically kill it if the niche is also rampant with people who are less attractive. Big fish, small pond.

It's not that women "aren't aware" of their types or that they're archetypal. It's that the foundation of the attraction typically hinges on the person being both good looking and also having the shared interests, etc.

Yes, it can boost, say, a conventional 6/10 who is your "type" ahead of the 7.5/10 who is not your "type". But some of that is just general compatibility, especially when it comes to hobbies, like the skating example, or goth music.

Kpop is more of a "look" for guys (and it's basically required to be conventionally attractive), but could be an interest, too. "Skinny tall dude" is just a physical look, it doesn't really say anything about the person. That's the "conventional attractiveness" at play.

Also, I have never given a fuck what my friends find attractive or not. Their opinions do not matter at all. I don't care who they date or find attractive, either. In fact, we typically disagree on what we think is ideal. I don't think most adult women care about their friends opinions like that.

And men are as prone to this as women. Why do you think there's memes about "big tiddy goth gf" or the archetype of the playboy bunny? Or of tradwives? Or hippie girls who go braless and want to have chickens and homestead? Sometimes thin girls are pitched as ideal, other times curvy women.

TDLR; archetypes are a thing, many people are aware of them and have preferred types. You'll get farther if you're more-or-less average the lean into an attractive niche or interest, but it alone may not "make" or break you.

basebornmanjack41 · 2022-10-08T08:37:52+00:00

I think you will find that outside of high school women aren’t as influenced by trends as you think.

Also you seem to think if you fit a certain type they will automatically find you attractive. When women say “I like skater boys” or whatever that doesn’t mean they will fall in love with someone ugly just because he has a skateboard, it means that if they find you attractive you will be slightly more attractive if you fit her type.

I like women with big personalities, who can talk to people and are funny. That doesn’t mean I will marry any unattractive girl who happens to be loud and funny.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-10-08T11:02:20+00:00

Have you ever listened to a group of women who are friends talk about what they find attractive? They're more likely to disagree than agree, and often make good-natured fun of each other's preferences. Women aren't just following what's fed to them, and have tastes of their own, some of which are more common and many of which, you're right, may have no biological advantage but some women just take a liking to it.

kokorwqac · 2022-10-08T10:06:51+00:00

Men are also influenced by trends and culture to a lesser degree

pinktuliplover · 2022-10-08T09:40:31+00:00

Not really. The trendy look in men is mainly a thing among teenagers. There has been some changes in the ideal man in the last 100 years, but the majority were still some version of a masculine male.

Men’s types are the ones that are more influenced based on women’s body trends. 20s was the petite , boyish flapper body type. 50s was the Marilyn Monroe hourglass. 60s was Twiggy. 70s was more tall and lean. 80s was the sporty look. 90s was huge boobs.

And of course we’re finally ending the BBL era to enter the insert name here era which will be a slimmer look, but of course with a small waist. The 20 year fashion cycle has already begun bringing in the 2000s look. Low rise jeans and flared leggings/yoga pants are already coming back and we’ll likely see more “clean girl aesthetic” for makeup with lots of more natural looking facial surgeries. More liposuction and minor BBLs only for the girls with completely flat butts.

wintergreen233 · 2022-10-08T13:43:09+00:00

Attraction is influenced by both biological and social factors. There has always been diversity amongst what women like, and in complex societies it makes sense for it to sort along subcultural lines.

The “trend” aspect is simply the boxes used to describe some of those differences. K-pop is a trend, so women specifically being interested in K-pop guys is a trend, but there’s nothing novel or trendy about young women being especially attracted to men of that general archetype (very young looking, less traditionally masculine, etc) — if you look back on teeny bopper magazines from previous eras you can draw many parallels.

There is also an element of social self-sorting. When I was younger I was mostly interested in punk and goth men, but those were also the subcultures I most identified with, participated in and modelled my own style around. It’s what I found both culturally and aesthetically appealing for myself and others, so naturally I was drawn to men who visually advertised they were from the same social tribe.

I’m unclear why you’re acting like this is bad. Men do it too — most people look to date within their own broad social affinity groups.

As far as the popularity of other terminology, like “dad bod,” I think that’s more a matter of social media making viral a novel description of a type that many women have always liked. Long before the phrase “dad bod” existed I knew women who liked that sort of look, and the reason it got so popular was women who fell into that category were like “yes, that’s what I like.”

I have a very strong physical type I’m attracted to. It’s been essentially the same for my entire teen and adult life. Only the fashion style preference has changed as I’ve grown up and evolved out of certain subcultures myself. So again, that aspect is mostly due to social self-sorting and identification.

Siukslinis_acc · 2022-10-08T13:05:10+00:00

I mean, what both men and women find attractive is shaped by society and what kind of people they constantly see.

I grew up mostly with tv series from the 80's-90's when a man having chest hair was pretty common (and the men in my irl surroundings had bodyhair). And guess what, i do find body hair attractive.

KayRay1994 · 2022-10-08T19:35:31+00:00

are men more resistant to it though? the most popular ‘types’ of women has kinda changed every decade or so depending on what’s popular - this is a weird point to claim superiority on

coolcpplearner · 2022-10-08T09:25:35+00:00

Lol okay so what's so bad about women liking a diverse range of men? You want us to all like the same kind of guy?

CimZim · 2022-10-08T10:09:33+00:00

Eh, this seems to be more true amongst high school and early college women, where it's still possible to easily be in a certain niche. There's the goths, the skater punks, the jocks, the theater kids, the plastics, etc. Once you get out into the real world, that identity gets far, far less important and men and women alike get more well-rounded as individuals.

Sure, my "type" has always been soft men...dudes who are chubby, have that extra meat on their bones, big thighs and round stomachs. Thicc dudes are delicious lol. But after leaving college and seeing more of life, I've realized that sometimes a skinny femboy in a skirt will catch my eye, or a goth gent with a well fitted outfit is nice to look at. The only 2 constants that have stayed with me all these years is not liking tall dudes and hating facial hair. Getting out and seeing many more types of men vs what your core clich group looked like opens you up to all different kinds of male attractiveness.

AutoModerator · 2022-10-08T08:16:34+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

CaribbeanxPrincess · 2022-10-08T14:16:51+00:00

Isn’t this the case for everyone? We are all influenced by trends and often what we are attracted to reflects that.

bunnakay · 2022-10-08T14:54:54+00:00

I think you're getting the cause and effect backwards. If I say I like a particular type, it's just being used as shorthand. I already found that type of guy attractive.

Also, who still has types like the ones you listed outside of high school?

GGMcThroway · 2022-10-08T16:51:08+00:00

Having a cohesive aesthetic that suits you is a good thing. Preferences in aesthetics change over time (though dad bod has always been a thing - it just has a name now). How is this news.

But lmao at the idea that men are resistant to changes in trends. That's why men like big tiddy goth girls and anime waifus, right?

Apprehensive_Cut_146 · 2022-10-08T17:15:34+00:00

Men are much more resistant to this

Is this why Insta models (with the "mainstream" body type) have millions of followers?

14ers4days · 2022-10-08T17:42:33+00:00

You're talking about teen and pre-teen girls, not women.

dottywine · 2022-10-08T18:04:02+00:00

Google female gaze. Just because a man thinks another man is a 3 doesn’t mean women agree. In the case of attracting the opposite sex, your opinion as a man doesn’t matter.

What men like is also trend driven.

Upstairs-Rip-604 · 2022-10-09T10:50:42+00:00

I think there are a lot of attractive guys in old movies made long before I was born.

Willow-girl · 2022-10-09T13:32:44+00:00

I disagree. I've had the same "type" for more than 40 years. Yes, I dated and even married guys who weren't really my type, but what really rings my bell has stayed the same. Maybe like geese we imprint on our first loves?

2022-10-13T01:46:37+00:00

Aesthetics change. But faces and bodies stay the same usually.

I've had a track record for the same type since I was old enough to be sexually attracted to others.

Additional_Speech164 · 2022-10-22T19:45:51+00:00

No it’s not. I’m older and have lived all over the world and dated all types . I’m attracted to the same type. It’s not about a haircut or jaw shape. I’m attracted to men I’m attracted to.

Title	Women’s “types” when it comes to looks is almost entirely trend driven and they don’t even realize it
Author	eth_trader_12
Upvotes	8
Comments	90
Date	October 8, 2022 8:16 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/xyn86x/womens_types_when_it_comes_to_looks_is_almost/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/womens-types-when-it-comes-to-looks-is-almost.1134635 https://theredarchive.com/post/1134635

Comments