Would you call yourself a "feminist"?

CimZim · 2022-11-13T02:29:47+00:00

No, I've never been a feminist. I'm an egalitarian. I don't call myself a feminist for the same reason I don't call myself a Christian...because I'm not one.

I agree with the idea that men and women should be treated as equals legally and socially and that double standards that negatively affect one sex can also negatively impact the other.

I don't believe in the patriarchy or that all men are at least slightly misogynistic or that men inherently have more social privileges than women.

Some of my guyfriends are feminist, I'll lightly touch on a few topics with them but try to avoid it for the most part. My FWB is an egalitarian too, and that makes such discussions easier and more common. Fwiw my entire family are tradcons so I largely avoid talking with them as well lol.

SeveralSadEvenings · 2022-11-13T02:40:11+00:00

I am lefty progressive and think women are entitled to their own economic and legal autonomy.

Beyond that, feminist discourse is tedious and navel gazey past the age of 25.

Once you've covered the basics there really isn't much more to be said on the topic.

I wouldn't talk about feminism with a guy I'm dating unless I'm actively trying to bore him.

Kay_Lore · 2022-11-13T03:14:29+00:00

No. I find that the term “feminism” is constantly changing depending on what’s convenient for the argument and the political landscape at the time. Maybe by standards a few decades ago I would have been, but definitely not today.

I am also somewhat traditional in a lot of ways so I don’t feel a big need to dismantle the “patriarchy” because I believe that the man should be the head of the household. I also feel that feminism teaches young women that it’s good to express sexuality outwardly to the world, which I disagree with. There’s plenty of other reasons but that’s the crux of it for me.

Things I agree with: Women should have the right to an abortion within reason, and birth control was a good invention. However, I tend to disagree with the consequences that occurred because of these things, but I tend to think of them as a necessary evil.

My boyfriend isn’t a feminist either, in fact we’re both fairly right-leaning politically and we’re both somewhat religious and traditional, so we tend to agree on most (not all) things. We both think men and women are equal and should be allowed to do whatever works best for them, but we also agree that the sexes are different and have separate functions. The only feminism issue we heavily disagree on is abortion.

ashpr0ulx · 2022-11-13T02:38:16+00:00

no. i find it to be a reductionist label.

SnowBorn6339 · 2022-11-13T03:45:36+00:00

No, because I do not like ideological labels. If you accept a label like “feminist,” “Republican,” “Christian” etc. then it implies you have to accept all the beliefs and values under that umbrella. And I definitely do not agree with the entirety of feminist ideology.

I do, of course, want gender equality. Society disadvantages both women and men in many different ways. From a feminist standpoint, I agree that a lot of men hyper-sexualize us (women). I recognize that men are far more likely to rape/murder/assault us than we are them. I’m tired of seeing rapists get jail sentences for only a few short months. I think that it’s much safer/easier for a man to enter a female-dominated space than it is for a woman to enter male-dominated spaces (for lots of reasons). For example, it’s super uncomfortable and intimidating to work in a majority-male company, which is why you don’t see a ton of women entering STEM. Many men often do not realize how domineering and intimidating they can be, which is a privilege for them.

However, feminism casts blame onto men that did nothing wrong, and I can’t get down with that. It adopts a victim mentality by creating boogeyman scapegoats like “the patriarchy” that can’t be well defined, and therefore can’t be resolved. I also think many feminists want men to shut up and take a step back in society, and while I think some men should (and some women), I do not like that approach to public discourse overall. It shuts men out of conversations on issues that impact us all. It also ignores the many ways in which men are disadvantaged in life (shorter life expectancy, higher rates of depression/suicide, paternity and divorce court disasters, etc). No ideology can address all these issues at once, which is why I don’t subscribe to them.

beleidigtewurst · 2022-11-13T03:21:22+00:00

100% yes. I’m not scared of the false claims made from people who don’t understand the core of what it is. Feminism has been a massive part of the Civil Rights movements. It’s not new, it’s historical and every changing.

Feminism focuses on equity. About making sure everyone gets to meet in the middle.

I agree with basically every element of feminism, and I think that a lot of people misidentify what feminism means and does. That being said I find flaws in people who describe themselves and feminist as well as “common” beliefs from it. I think TERFS are trying to adopt feminism and I think they are inherently wrong, and don’t fit into feminist values at all.

I don’t date men that make a point to say they are a feminist, I think it’s been adopted as a pick up tactic and I’ve found misogyny rampant among men who are self described feminists.

Like most things, if you have to tell people all the time it’s kind of a red flag. If you have to tell people your rich, attractive, a good person all the time then you’re most likely not, that being said most men I do go out with are feminist in their values with some occasional mismatched beliefs.

I present myself as feminist to men that ask about me, because it’s a good way to sort through the ones worth my time quickly.

It’s a good question, I’m super passionate about it ❤️

punk_baby333 · 2022-11-13T08:05:55+00:00

No. I disagree with most of feminisms current major talking points. I also believe in traditional family values and that women and men are better suited to different roles at work and in the home.

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CruelAngelGradThesis · 2022-11-13T02:36:27+00:00

Yes, if nothing else it's a good vetting tool.

What feminist beliefs and values do you agree with, what feminist beliefs and values do you disagree with?

Agree: pretty much everything that doesn't involve sexuality

Disagree: pretty much everything that involves sexuality

Do you ever discuss feminism and equality of the sexes with guys you're dating?

Yes. My BF is arguably more of a feminist than I am.

bunnakay · 2022-11-13T06:42:07+00:00

Absolutely. Since I don't want to be a SAHM barefoot in the kitchen, the "why" seems obvious. I would not be able to have the life I want without feminism.
I'm libfem and, frankly, disavow TERFs. Trans women are more my sisters than they are.
Again, absolutely. I'd never date a guy who is anti-feminism. My husband is definitely a feminist.

marxistjokerthe2th · 2022-11-13T10:42:27+00:00

I would call myself a Marxist feminist but I don't think feminism is much of an ideology on its own and its meaning has been reduced in recent years that's why I add the Marxism to it

Tricky_Dog1465 · 2022-11-13T07:51:22+00:00

I'm not sure how to answer that.

I don't particularly agree with today's feminism. So, maybe more of a 1st wave feminist?

I believe in equality for both sexes. I believe that both have of the sexes have their own issues, and both need support from the other. (Men should be helping in the fight against sexual harassment, women should be helping men against against the unequality of child custody, for instance. )

Laws need to be updated on both sides when it comes to things like sexual assault. The perpetrators should be getting tougher sentences (and with stalking), and there needs to be tough sentences for those who abuse others of sexual assault and it is PROVEN to be a lie. (I don't mean they're isn't enough evidence, I mean there is dna out solid proof that the adviser was a flat out liar.)

So basically what I mean is, I think the absolute women hating and absolute men hating is just wrong. We aren't going to get anywhere that way. The only way forward is to with together for the good of both.

beleidigtewurst · 2022-11-13T13:37:17+00:00

In countries like South Korea, "feminism" is a synonym for "unhinged, aggressive woman"

For a good reason.

In the West, I see various groups: 1) "Bend over backwards for women and call it equality!!!" 2) People who try to find "nuance" in different waves, which makes me chuckle as lies/fantasies multiplied by dubious, mostly in-principle unfalsifiable theories were there from day 1. (e.g. Frau Wolf complaining about lack of female Shakespeare being caused by "women were not allowed to write poems", a lie) 3) other groups are even less welcoming

Seriously, in the West, where the bottom of our social pyramid (prisoners, homeless, suicides, deaths at work, all sort of health issues, parental alienation, struggling with men hating education system) is filled by boys/men, b1tching about "male privilege" is quite off putting.

BusinessGarage2606 · 2022-11-13T09:05:33+00:00

I started becomimg a feminist when I discovered red pill spaces. Before I was just living my life. I never wanted to be traditionally feminine, I was never a conservative. But I also didn't care about feminism.

But reading and watching red pill stuff showed me that nothing has changed in a way men see us, that men are still hateful towards us and don't really want us to be our own person. Many didn't even think we should have space for our interests. I saw tons of posts saying that the only interest a woman should have is serving her family.

So I became more and more involved in feminism.

Yes, I do talk with my man about feminism and why I saw the need to be more involved in it.

I disagree with hookup culture.

_revelationary · 2022-11-13T03:08:09+00:00

Not in the modern sense of the word, but yes. My husband is too. We are politically liberal and pro-choice. I think those are the main reasons we’d identify in that way…we just certainly are not “anti-feminist.” But we aren’t super politically active as feminists, and wouldn’t agree with everything modern feminism argues.

I do think men and women have important differences but these don’t fit every person and situation, so I don’t think anyone should have to conform to specific roles or play by different rules based on their gender. I also think gender dynamics (and human behavior, broadly) are influenced by social and economic factors that are sometimes difficult to separate from the biological.

JumboJetz · 2022-11-13T03:14:44+00:00

Yes i am a feminist for rough equality between the sexes under the law.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-11-13T11:47:31+00:00

Yes. Simply put, I can see that there is systemic discrimination against women, and would like that to stop. My beliefs largely align with radical feminism. (Which doesn't mean "extreme" feminism or anything, although any kind of feminist can be extreme.) There are many beliefs that can be considered feminist that I can agree or disagree with, too many to list here. I don't date people who don't consider themselves feminist/womanist or an ally, and I frequently discuss feminist topics with my partner as I do with my friends and family.

AstronautLoveShack · 2022-11-13T02:36:52+00:00

Absolutely. But the word does not have the negative connotations to me that it does the younger generations.

The9thElement · 2022-11-13T03:04:27+00:00

Yes

I disagree with sex work, kink and pron being marketed to women as empowering.

FineDevelopment00 · 2022-11-13T03:23:24+00:00

Would you call yourself a "feminist"?

That all depends on what kind of feminism we're talking about. I don't identify with what feminism has currently become, but you could call me an old-school (very old-school, like Wollstonecraft-era) feminist who were really more egalitarian than anything else.

Why, or why not?

There's a lot I disagree with in mainstream feminism but quite a bit I agree with in other forms of feminism, plus I tend to step outside of labels a bit.

What feminist beliefs and values do you agree with, what feminist beliefs and values do you disagree with?

I agree with the egalitarian principles of old-school feminism and I agree with some tenets of radical/4th-wave feminism such as being anti-prostitution, anti-surrogacy, anti-porn and anti-pornsick influences, etc. However, I disagree with liberal/3rd-wave feminism and other aspects of radical/4th-wave feminism such as being anti-marriage (it's fine if some people truly aren't called to get married but marriage as an institution shouldn't be denigrated altogether like many modern feminists do), misandrist, pro-promiscuity, etc.

Do you ever discuss feminism and equality of the sexes with guys you're dating?

Being married, I don't date other guys. But I have discussed these topics with my husband (who shares my views, btw.)

NJFlowerchild · 2022-11-13T15:19:04+00:00

I don't identify as a feminist, but most people would probably label me as one. I believe in gender equality and a woman's right to choose. Everyone should be able to live a lifestyle that makes them feel comfortable. That could be a career woman, stay at home mom, or anything else.

w1se_old_tree · 2022-11-13T02:30:06+00:00

Yes. Believe in liberation more than equal outcome. Disagree with liberal feminism’s desire to mimic male sexual behavior. Believe women should be independent. Would like a man who is compassionate towards women’s plight.

Mrs_Drgree · 2022-11-13T02:38:20+00:00

I generally do not consider myself a feminist, though I wouldn't go so far as to call myself anti-feminist. I understand what they are going for and I can see how it makes sense to them, even if I can't be bothered. I think men and women should be equal in the eyes of the law, sure... But everything else is kind of meh. I don't care if a particular company doesn't want to hire women or if an individual man is a misogynist. Meh.

zombie_still_alive · 2022-11-13T03:18:16+00:00

Doesn’t matter. I do believe that both gender need to be treated equally as much as possible, but there are differences that need to be acknowledged and solution found so that both gender can feel safe, respected and have the opportunities to pursue their dreams. I prefer that both gender are treated equitably instead of equally,

And as long as the women around me, including my wife and daughter, would say that I am a feminist, that’s all that really mater; that their feel respected.

Upstairs-Rip-604 · 2022-11-13T07:08:17+00:00

I strive for equal opportunity for men and women.

NthKnife · 2022-11-13T22:59:35+00:00

Depends on the context. I'd say I have feminist values and beliefs, yes. I talk about equality often with my partner but we're both queer, so.

thetruthishere_ · 2022-11-14T02:05:28+00:00

I just believe both genders should be able to obtain credit, buy a home, get jobs, start business, etc.

We can chose to stay single, we can choose to get married, we can choose to have kids or not.

When it comes to dating/marriage do what works for you, again we have that choice.

Be it a stay at home mom, close to 50/50, 50/50, create your own balance, etc.(Ex: one pays the mortgage but the other pays utilities/groceries, etc, that balance of contribution to each other/bills)

We have a choice in what we want in a relationship not what 'society says'.

MistyMaisel · 2022-11-14T02:26:11+00:00

Not a feminist. I don't call myself one because I'm not one. I don't really subscribe to labels that much at this point in my life. It just feels stupid. I want good things for people and I think that will look quite different for different people. And I think taking on labels is a way to avoid really dealing with real issues.

Sophiatab · 2022-11-14T15:44:08+00:00

Absolutely, I am a feminist. I believe women and men should be equal socially and legally. About the only mainstream feminist beliefs I disagree with are the concepts around child-support. I don't believe it should apply to non-marital relationships. This is also one of the reasons I am pro-choice (abortion on demand and without apology) and I honestly believe it would be better for society if abortion was free and actively promoted as a solution to many troubling pregnancies.

dumbbitchcas · 2022-11-16T02:48:01+00:00

Yes. That simple.

Would you call yourself a "feminist"?

Comments

In countries like South Korea, "feminism" is a synonym for "unhinged, aggressive woman"

Seriously, in the West, where the bottom of our social pyramid (prisoners, homeless, suicides, deaths at work, all sort of health issues, parental alienation, struggling with men hating education system) is filled by boys/men, b1tching about "male privilege" is quite off putting.

Does that shit even out somewhat?

Title	Would you call yourself a "feminist"?
Author	w1se_old_tree
Upvotes	3
Comments	99
Date	November 13, 2022 2:09 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ytp27n/would_you_call_yourself_a_feminist/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/would-you-call-yourself-a-feminist.1138809 https://theredarchive.com/post/1138809