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[–]AidanAzzar 179 points180 points181 points 5 years ago (15 children) | Copy Link
I know a dude like this. He’s able to artificially elevate his social status wherever he goes. The guy sleeps with a fair few girls but he’s utterly miserable.
Has next to 0 real connections and lives life jumping from one social circle to another. He doesn’t “belong” to any of them and no one gives a fuck about him because they know he’s just a walking performance.
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
if you are a true and tested sociopath, this is how you would live but ultimately not really be lonely, as long as there are more willing people to be around for you to use in the short term. but for someone that isn't narcissistic or antisocial, this isn't the life you want to lead.
[–]iEatBlackPeoplesButt 28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link
Yeah.. the stuff in op is similar to what I used to do when I was a drug addict. Was very miserable and lonely deep down and was using my social intelligence and seduction knowledge with no fucks given every weekend at the clubs. Definitely had decent results
[–]DrixlRey 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
So what do, go with this strategy or not!? XD
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For a limited time, yeah...
[–]iEatBlackPeoplesButt 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Idk you need to have a specific mindset for it since I was ruthlessly manipulating. My therapist confirmed that it was purely sociopathic behavior but done out of pain. I would reccomend just focusing on yourself and gaming properly but also learning night game on the side. It’s way more fufilling
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
I guess that comes down to you. If it really is your one life goal to sleep with as many girls as possible (as it seems that is the true goal of most people here) go ahead but for the love of god use protection cause sleeping with that many people is asking for an STD. But if you want any true substance or happiness in your life, just focus on bettering yourself and developing natural, true connections with people.
[–]iEatBlackPeoplesButt 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah I got ghonorrea and chlymadia a few times from raw dogging it lmao. I was focused on all that and was going through a period where I was failing, lost all my friends and was just getting started on my career route while also dealing with a drug addiction. Took out my frustrations by ruthlessly gaming in another city
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Totally agree
[–]ttecluk 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds psychopathic tbh. Psychopaths don't stay in one place all the time cuz people figure them out. Not enough info to make a fair judgement, but sounds like it.
[+]TheDeadlyZebra -9 points-8 points-7 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Yes, I too am jealous of this man. He must be miserable getting so much more pussy than you.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
He is miserable. And you put pussy on a high value scale. He is miserable because he has low self worth. Why else would he have to lie about a life he doesn’t have? Why else would he chase after pussy so hard? There’s nothing special about pussy so it’s what it’s doing for him that’s glaringly obvious. He uses it for validation. You seem to think that’s valuable.
[–]TheDeadlyZebra -4 points-3 points-2 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What is he sacrificing in exchange for his pursuit of pussy? How can you logically conclude that the man in OP's story is miserable, simply because your friend might be?
You seem to think that getting pussy is worthless. Enjoy your life of celibacy or gay sex, whichever you prefer.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I explained it. Lying about life, making it grander than what it is= low self value. Again, why else would he lie? If he believed in himself there’d be no need to lie. The pussy thing I already explained as well: he seemingly chases pussy. Quite a bit if the story is true. This comes from a warped relationship with pussy. It reeks of neediness for validation through women. Could you imagine James Bond acting like this? The dude has low self value, is needy and figured out a way to satisfy his needs but ignores his real self.
I love women and having sex with them. But I’ll never ever chase a woman. They are too low on the ladder for me. Not valueless, just not anywhere higher than they need to be.
[–]TheDeadlyZebra 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
There should be a distinction made between chasing a certain pussy and chasing pussy in general. Men should be competitive and access to vagina is no different. I agree that it's harmful to chase a single pussy though.
I think lying about life in order to boost your game and get access to young women is pretty standard. It's just salesmanship.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Why “should”? Be careful with shoulds. The dude in the hostel wasn’t chasing a single pussy. He wasn’t even chasing pussy in general. He was acting out. This is what most guys do. They aren’t competitive. They are validation seeking. Why? Bc they have zero self belief due to a disconnection with themselves. It’s harmful to chase pussy period. You put your bid in and that’s it. Maybe play a little if you’re feeling charming that day. But chasing is chasing and it usually doesn’t have anything to do with women.
Lying about ones life is probably fairly standard. Agreed. But this is a shame. Men don’t have to lie. They are proud of who they are and stand on that with two feet. Even if he works at Starbucks. It’s an attitude and a relationship to the self. Standard doesn’t make something right. It just means it’s common.
Again, could you see James Bond competing for a lay? Fuck no. A woman doesn’t want him? Big deal. Not a priority. Enjoyable but not a priority.
[–]pratmeister 48 points49 points50 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Appreciate the observational skill you have displayed in describing this behaviour in such detail. This will be definitely be useful for you in upping your game (outer as well as inner). Also, as a couple have mentioned, assess your feelings and thoughts about some of the strategies this guys used, pick the ones you feel comfortable with, try them out, and reassess and figure it out based on your experience.
[–]thrashourumov 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Definitely. I like the social status meter timeline thing. It's all about having your internal/mental state up and resilient. Good psy hacks.
[–]GhostWCoffee 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Agreed. You definitely could learn a thing or two from your friend, OP, but you know damn well that he's acting like a peacock, all show. You know that you want your relationships (whether casual or serious) to be meaningful. You want to have fun and want to share this fun with women. I'm like that, too. He doesn't deserve to be hated because he is how he is, but you also are how you are, therefore you have no obligation to mimic your friend, and your gut feeling tells you exactly this. Prancing around like a rooster can only do so much. Focus on building your genuine confidence and the right people will like you.
Also, it seemed to me like you got a bit jealous over the Mexican girl. Yes, it's important to tell your friend to not talk to a girl because you've got your eyes on her. Discussions like this are normal between guy friends. Luckily she sniffed out his bullshit and you ended up with her (in bed?). Just an observation, that might be a sign of insecurity and something worth working over.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It was mainly because it was a clear show of disrespect. I knew he was trying it on with her right in front of me by speaking Spanish after I told him a minute earlier not to (I've seen him do it with a lot of girls). I think it's important to show some assertiveness here otherwise people can lose respect for you. If someone disrespects you like this it's important to not be scared to call it out (not necessarily being angry, you can make light of it while showing you don't like it)
[–]GhostWCoffee 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Absolutely. Stand up for yourself when being disrespected. You telling him off for getting in front of you and talking to the girl (in Spanish) are clear signs he's inconsiderate, among other things. And obviously, you don't get mad and throw punches for any thing. You can be civil and still tell him that it's not cool.
[–]Thin_Title83 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly 👌 you can call someone out without being a total dick.
[–][deleted] 198 points199 points200 points 5 years ago (35 children) | Copy Link
Yeah i'm good, I wouldn't want to lower myself to his level just to get with some girls.
Good write-up though OP
[–]Grizzlies5003 32 points33 points34 points 5 years ago (29 children) | Copy Link
This shit only works on gullible young women. Women with status will send you to the depths of a deep freeze with this approach
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (28 children) | Copy Link
But all women are wired to find high social status very attractive. Fair enough it might not be real, but if it seems real then even high social status women would fall for it. In fact, the higher the social status of the women, the higher the social status you need to portray for this to work (obviously just acting popular won't cut it then, you'll probably need to be successful in your job, be intelligent etc).
However, even if this popularity is fake at first, I think if you keep talking to a lot of people etc then after a while it will be your natural self. Ie you will naturally develop a habit of being a very sociable person who talks to a lot of people.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
Wrong. Stop reading that bullshit. If you know how to turn a woman on by talking to her it doesn’t matter your station in life. For long term you are perhaps correct. But don’t look at others experience and books and videos and extrapolate universal blanket truths. Use your own experience.
And before you say “I have experienced that”, I’ll ask: have you been with every “high value” woman? And what is a high value woman anyway? Looks?
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
/s B-but, all of my pickup books told me that girls love douchebags as long as they have money and power!
But seriously, I think you’re completely right. I think as long as you’re confident and seem even a little bit genuine I think you can do fine. I think the guys here would honestly have a lot more luck if they just stopped taking the advice on this sub seriously altogether. Girls can tell when you just want to sleep with them, believe it or not, and if it is your one life goal to sleep with a girl then that’s definitely gonna shine through. I’m only still here cause it’s like a train wreck to be honest, you can’t look away. Just today I saw a comment on a thread complaining that he can’t hook up with a girl, then proceed to say he tries to get numbers from everyone “even 1s” just for practice and it’s not working. Yeah, if you’re not only referring to women based on their ranking in appearance to you, but also inserting yourself into their life just for “practice”, maybe it’s time that you take a step back and focus on yourself for a bit.
Maybe, just maybe, the reason why successful people have an easier time getting with people doesn’t have to do entirely with the success itself. Maybe it’s cause they’ve proven that they care more about bettering themselves than putting their dicks in the nearest women they could fine. I mean, it’s hard to become a millionaire or a professional musician if you’re never improving yourself/your work and just constantly focusing on how to get laid. But I dunno, that’s just a theory.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You get an upvote. The only thing I’d correct your on is the part about “...seem even a little bit genuine”. I know exactly what you are saying but why not be genuine instead of seeming like it.
Therein lies the problem which I’m sure you’ll agree with me on: guys have zero fucking clue as to how to be a genuine guy let alone a genuine man.
I think it has a lot to do with living online. It started way back in 2000 when sims and online avatars became a thing. People could exist and not exist at the same time. Or exist as someone else completely. This expands and grows across numerous platforms from MMOs to IG to Twitch where one can literally drop who they are and embody a persona that isn’t their own. Highly destructive. Stay too long and you’ll even forget that you’re someone who lost itself. Another development is high social anxiety, fear of criticism, fear of becoming an outcast, fear of ridicule, fear of putting things out there. Young dudes literally frightened to start a YouTube channel (what??). Then when it’s time to operate in the real world bc no matter what you do it’s social demands pull on you to participate, they are completely screwed up.
This bifurcation leads to unhappiness and confusion bc the real way is through congruence (thoughts, words and actions in alignment).
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Man it’s so nice to finally see someone else speak on this. I couldn’t agree more, social media has wrecked the way we see ourselves. In fact, I just recently took a break from social media for a year or two, that’s why my Reddit account is pretty young. And yeah, I for sure meant to actually be more genuine rather than just act like it.
I think it’s cause more than anything else social media and media in general (movies and such) promote these 2D personas as the greatest things ever. For example you have the “playboy” persona that I think most of the people here look up to, the badass, the nice guy, all of that. So people go into real life, like you said, operating off of fulfilling that same persona. But then, like you also said, their actions don’t aline with their own thoughts and values. They only do it to fulfill a persona that they may have seen in a movie, or that they may even already fulfill online, without any real thought behind why or who it benefits. It’s like, it’s normal to feel good for doing good things, it’s a natural response. But now thinking that they’re a good person is what gives people that same high, not the action itself. In other words, they don’t base their actions off of empathy and compassion, or even their own personal values and what they want. They do it to try to fulfill whatever persona they have at that time. And cause of that, their “desired” persona will constantly be changing based on their current role models and circumstances, or even what’s trendy, and they’ll never have any sort of genuineness.
I think I just made 0 sense here lmao but basically, I agree a lot with what you just said.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Nope. I got all of that. And they do it solely out of fear.
[–]Grizzlies5003 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Ahh your situation in life definitely matters. You can turn a woman on thats great and all but long term your baggage will probably be too much. A woman with high status ie( a solid career) who looks decent and knows how to take care of herself will look for a man of similar qualities( a man with a career, drive and goals) she wont settle for less if she dosn’t have too. Turning her on emotionally will get your foot in the door for awhile but its only a matter of time before the other stuff becomes a hinderance.
[–]Dominus-Prime- 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Absolutely. I don’t disagree except the attitude that got you in the door, the talking to her that makes her wet and horny needs to never go away. Seduction, the tapping into women’s feelings is a lifelong thing. You could have your life together all you want, but if you lack the ability to arouse her without even touching her, you’ve lost.
It also matters if you care or not as a man. Some guys are fine with magnetizing women to them then letting them go after a bit- high value woman or not.
[–]Grizzlies5003 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Yeah exactly lol, i actually stressed the seduction point a few weeks back. Being fully in your masculine and making sure you do it right in the bedroom, will most likely always have your woman by your side, i stress the (first impressions in the bedroom alot) women remember
[–]Dominus-Prime- 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
“Being in your masculine?” That implies a time when you’re not. Personally I’m not “in” anything. I am a man at all times. A lion is always in the state of being a lion. He has no choice. There’s not even an awareness of anything else.
[–]Grizzlies5003 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thats what i meant, i just worded it wrong.
[–]bomko 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
this is such a bad advice, i mean everything you learn in school is basically a form of second hand experience, if people would try to learn everything on their own even multiple lifetimes are not enough. Why would't people who approached a lot of different women recognize the pattern then and try to teach others? What you experience is resistance to the truth, why would success at job and intelligence etc. be needed to have a high social status? you dont even need to portray it, you can just have it. I think you misunderstand what it means really, cause it all comes down how people react to you and nothing more. And yeah being a pilot for an example brings reaction out of people but if you are bland that wont help you and your status will retrace, while if you have a bad job and everyone are happy that you are around your social status would be much higher than of some awkward smart millionaire
[–]Dominus-Prime- 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
School is much different. Not the same at all. You can’t pass a science exam by knowing who you are. You can’t get a job in accounting by knowing what your values and principles are.
The secret of game, of THE game is that it has absolutely nothing to do with women whatsoever. There is no pattern my man. YOU are the only pattern worth looking at. And that’s the biggest problem most young guys have (I did it too): they spend way too much time in front of the window, seeking answers outside themselves (books, YouTube, Reddit) when they should be spending more time in front of a mirror. You (not you specifically) are the reason why you fail. Getting out and doing your thing, falling on your face, getting up, changing things about yourself takes time but is the most effective.
But what do guys do? They don’t do shit. They watch videos and try to copy what someone who isn’t them did. You are not that YouTube personality. And the more time spent paying attention to someone else’s “secrets to getting women” is more time wasted by not learning who you are- which is ultimately what women want. Ironically, when you get there, you don’t give a shit what women want.
[–]bomko 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
you mostly have a points but most people dont know basics, such as firm handshake, strong eye contact, know how to listen, know how to talk. Then we can move to more subtle signs, of how to read persons feelings. i mean there is a lot of learnable things there. I do agree however that those kind of things have nothing to do with woman, it all has to do with you, and your success everywhere, woman are then just a byproduct of your high vibraton. But to achieve that you must change yourself, but that can also be taught. just like math, someone can explain you the theory but you must do the exercises to pass an exam
[–]Dominus-Prime- 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree to a point. I can’t teach you how to be you. I can only teach you methods to discover yourself. I can’t say do this or that and you’ll know who you are so no it’s not like math. I can show you exercises and habits to develop but what and how you learn is up to you. It’s completely individual becoming a man. Your example of reading someone else comes not from an external set that is learned either. This too comes from knowing who you really are.
Most guys go through life like this. And this is what the underlying cause of the infamous “mid-life crisis” is. They get to a tipping point and feel like they’ve lived a life that isn’t their own. Most don’t even get it then and turn to fast cars and a willy-nilly lifestyle— ignoring it yet again.
[–]Gackt1 points 5 years ago* [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
not learning who you are- which is ultimately what women want
"just be yourself bro" lol
Like all good lies, there's a kernel of truth to it, but that's not real good advice.
Nope. You got it wrong. Because most guys self they are “just being” is weak, shy, lazy, fat, scared, and low self worth. One must become yourself. Bro
Been reading too much PUA advice eh?
[–]argonaut93 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Bro the aloof dick thing 100% works and so does the cool guy social status thing. I dont care who thinks of it negatively, make your own decision about using it, bearing in mind that it works.
Just don't base your decision on people online who think its scummy or think that the status you appear to have doesn't matter. That's naive.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah I think I agree. I don't like the fakeness but it does work if done well and ultimately will become natural for someone if they keep doing it.
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 -3 points-2 points-1 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I mean it's a fact that women go for social status in men, I can even show you studies about it
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
If u/kitkatx0x0 is a F then that was a giant “mansplain” on your part.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
A fact is a fact, why should I not state a fact which is backed by evidence and why should whether I mention the fact or not depend on the gender of the person I am replying to?
If someone thinks I'm wrong then they can correct me and we can talk about the evidence of the claim I made. Maybe there are studies to the contrary and I'm willing to see them. "Mainsplain" is a sexist term in itself, used decisively to make a ad hominem attack rather than sticking to the subject of the discussion
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If you (a M, if I understand correctly?) are explaining to a woman what it is that makes women attracted to men, how valid do you think that is?
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Again, it doesn't matter what sex either person is, only the content of what is being said and whether there is evidence behind it or not. How can the identity of either person relate to the validity of the content?
[–][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It's not pua shit it's what men and women are attracted to. Women have always tended to go for men with high social status and low social status is a big turn off. And social status is relative like most things, meaning women want me who are high social status than themselves Again there are studies on this, I can show you.
And it depends what you're goals are as a guy. If you want to just get laid then you can be void on the inside and still be successful. And you may look down on guys like that but it's because your goals are different to his. And I'm not saying guys should only care about social status if they want a relationship, I'm that it's a big thing but yes it's also important to be respectful, considerate etc.
Agreed, the being social part is good. But being a fake is gonna get girls to resent you after a while.
[–]Pinkar 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Lower yourself?
[–]Ducharbaine -3 points-2 points-1 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
When people say don't "Lower yourself" what they mean is that they are jealous and they're making up an imaginary moral superiority because of sour grapes.
[–]Pinkar -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh.... Now I understand YouTube comments...
[–]rwramire 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Counter, isn't this the alpha male persona of idgaf therefor I lie and try to steal others girls.
[–]norwegiandoggo 120 points121 points122 points 5 years ago (23 children) | Copy Link
Things you failed to mention
1) It's a hostel. The world's easiest place to hook up with people.
2) He is Italian. Italian men are generally considered desireable by almost all cultures.
His little charade might work wonders for one night stands. But it would fall apart quickly if the girls got to know him at a deeper level. Don't think this is an effective strategy if you want something long-term and meaningful
[–]silverbird666 9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
That is comparing apples to oranges tough. This "tactic" works extremely well at what it is supposed to do - it wont get you a serious relationship, but that is definitely not the goal here. It also wont get you a new car because again, that is not what it is supposed to do.
[–]SpunkyDred 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
apples to oranges
But you can still compare them.
[–]silverbird666 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You can, but why should you?
It won't get you a relationship if you are lying and being fake obviously because the girl will see through it in time. But for just getting laid his approach obviously works well. Depends on your goals.
But also, I think there are some good learning opportunity with seeing this guy I'm action around building your social status, talking to lots of people, approaching several girls etc
[–]_Jordan- 24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I can confirm the italian thing or appeal (being myself an italian) even though i don't really understand it... I went to different language schools (England , Germany mainly) and when i met new people some of the girls where always like "ooh you're italian i love your language and pasta or whatever, I've been to x and x place in italy" i honestly don't understand the reaction compared to like "oh your from x country, thas cool". I know that italy and italians are famous but i don't get where that reaction or image of italians comes from (probably stereotypes from movies or celebrities idk)
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
The original Latins were in what is now Italy. Latin men have a culture that meshes very well with pickup artist concepts. Asian men (I am one) have a culture that is quite the opposite
[–]_Jordan- 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I get what you're saying, I've met a few asian people mostly from Japan and Philippines and this semester a girl from south korea stayed in my apartment (exchange student) and you can notice the difference right away... We are more outgoing and open (sometimes too much) asians are a bit more quiet and chill (from my experience)
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I feel like I’m swimming upstream against 2000 years of Confucian values sometimes. Going against my ancestral culture and my parents in order to be social and date women. It doesn’t come naturally to me. Asian culture is based on arranged marriage and dating in the modern Western sense isn’t really a thing. Focusing on education and career instead of social skills is the most important thing because it’s your status that matters in terms of getting married, not your seduction skills. It’s also traditional to stay a virgin until marriage because you’re considered more valuable that way. In Western culture, virginity (especially for men) is a liability because it means you have no experience. In Asian culture, it’s considered a good thing to be inexperienced socially and sexually. It’s so opposite and it’s so hard.
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can see how those conflicting cultures (in terms of relationships and sex) could make things difficult. There are women who would much prefer an inexperienced and even awkward guy who actually respects them than a suave, smooth talker who doesn’t care about their partner. And it helps if you are willing to learn from your partner, do some reading ahead of time about sexual technique, and are willing to communicate about sex (before, during, and after).
I speak from experience.
[–]norwegiandoggo 15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I think it's part fashion related (Milan), part food related (you can cook them things), and generally the impressive cultural history, with art and architecture.
[–]_Jordan- 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
True... but the reaction always surprises me in comparison to when people from other countries meet but somehow when they meet an italian usually they are more enthusiastic about it
[–]Thin_Title83 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly in the US Italian's are mobsters a lot of MAFIA movies here. Italian's come off strong and smart because they're gangsters and it takes a certain level of intelligence and strength to try and go up against law enforcement. Plus there's a lot of good looking Italian American Actors. Italy has a rich and popular culture and it's that way throughout history. Italian's all have a certain level of arrogance. I'm Italian and writing this I can only say I wish my wife was Italian lol because it makes my children less Italian lol. The Italian Stallion lol we are an arrogant people 😆 🤣 😂
[–]Sacha117 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's the most beautiful language in the world, and Italians are the epitome of dark and handsome.
[–]majkkali 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It's a hostel. The world's easiest place to hook up with people.
That's not true at all
He is Italian. Italian men are generally considered desireable by almost all cultures.
This on the other hand is 100% true
[–]imayscamu 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Hostels are the easiest to pull tho.
Yes it probably is the easiest place in the world to pull
[–]erect_sean 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
At the very least hostels are the easiest place to talk to people. Everybody is open to conversation.
[–]leelbeach 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I'm mostly Italian and it hasn't helped me :(
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You’re probably not Italian from Italy. Culture is everything
[–]leelbeach 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah I suppose your right. I get complimented on my name a lot but that's about it.
[–]sedhazard 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Agreed!
[–]bomko 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
2) is such a bad take the reason italian man are much more desired is because they are much more open, touchy, friendly, its like that in an italian culture. So when they come abroad and they are still acting the way they act at home they are getting reactions, especially if girls are not used to this (like in italy). My point is, that everyone could be like that, and their success with women would improve
[–]hollister_K 17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like a Con Artist to me. Creep..
[–]Twobithatter 142 points143 points144 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I don’t know if I would consider your friend to be a successful guy. He seems like a creep who wanders that hostel until a girl decides to go home with him. I always say I prefer quality over quantity
[–]dcssornah 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Quantity has a quality of its own.
[–]FellowCat69 44 points45 points46 points 5 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
I hate people like that so fucking much. I want to throw up when i see someone like that.
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I know I hate them too but hey girls love bad boys.
[–]FellowCat69 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Trust me they dont and they are not bad boys
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Yep those are bad boys. It’s the hard truth.
[–]FellowCat69 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
There is nothing "bad" in being popular or social . If these are bad boys i have to be a terrorist
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
No being bad boy isn’t just about being popular when a girls says that she likes “bad boys” she means guys that are a little tougher around the edges. For example Tony Stark. His rich and popular nothing wrong with that. But he has nor problem being a dick to a girl having a one night stand, kicking her out, flirting with other girls when he has a girlfriend, being reckless party guy etc. This is what women refer to bad boys. Many girls get turned on when their boyfriend flirts with other girls cause it shows preselection Bad boys do that shit nice guys would never flirt with another girl in front of their girlfriend.
[–]FellowCat69 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
When i flirted with other girls around my gf ended pretty bad its not a turn on depends on the person i think
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
The thing is don’t do it directly in front of her. Do it like you’re acting you don’t know she’s there, you have to be subtle and play the victim card “I’m not flirting that’s how I talk to every girl why are you needy”. Believe me it works amazingly well, that’s why bad boys and fuckboys do this they’re manipulative and seductive.
[–]FellowCat69 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That is just a dick move man
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can’t even begin to explain how fucked up this advice is. It sounds like a direct entry from “The Clueless Scum of the Earth Playbook.”
[–]MrColfax 22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This guy hangs out in hostels picking up girls. Kinda like bragging about always winning blackjack when you're the dealer.
[–]helteringskeltering 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Typical PUA shit. These guys can “screen” the more gullible/low self-esteem women. It’s a perfected skill. Knowing which girls like to seek validation from men (playing hard to get, for example), and zoning in on them. It’s good social skills, but you are practicing on people who it would be extremely easy to have sex with in the first place (I.e., they were already willing to have sex that night). It doesn’t get you girls with high self-esteem. So it’s really only for sex, and practicing social skills, no more than that bud.
[–]Ozymandias3148 21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I get people act like chameleons to get laid but this guy sounds like a straight up sociopath
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I agree I think he actually is. At least I'm almost certaon from some other things he actually has narcastic personality disorder.
[–]take_five 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thought narcissism right away.
[–]Paltenburg 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Ah yeah he sounds like a total dick. So: try to be like that, except be nice in the process. I think the key take-aways are:
having lots of little interactions with different people.
But
I don't like the feeling of acting like this when I don't feel like it inside
I have this too most of the times, but after like a holiday or a long festival I notice with myself that I can get into that mood / attitude / state. Like: If you do it a lot, your brain gets used to it, and it gets easier so you get energy from it easier.
Yes exactly, I've made an edit to my post to reflect exactly that among other things.
[–]VDKay 22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Hey guys (other commenters here). I agree that this guys is essentially playing a quantity-over-quality game. However, he sounds like he has been perfecting his social skills at least. If he does decide to work on himself, build himself a career let's say, and moves on to meet high-quality girls, he would most probably be way ahead of competition (the average career man) in terms of experience. He is confident, he knows how to be sexual, he knows how to handle rejection, he has conquered approach anxiety, he knows how to make small-talk with anyone and be likable. So don't be quick to judge or cancel him. Learn what you can and discard the rest. If you don't approve of his methods, nobody is forcing you to practice them anyway. But let us hear of your success stories.
[–]macroxela -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If he does decide to work on himself, build himself a career let's say, and moves on to meet high-quality girls, he would most probably be way ahead of competition (the average career man) in terms of experience.
If he knows how to apply such experience. I've seen my fair share of guys who started off like him but found it difficult when trying to work on themselves or pursue serious relationships. Many of them do this from a place of weakness to cover their lack of self-confidence or self-value making them unable to apply their skills in a differnt context. For those that are secure with themselves, they do wind up ahead of the competition.
[–]VDKay 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've seen my fair share of guys who are secure with themselves, even arrogant at some point, but are absolutely terrible at talking to women and eliciting attraction feelings. The basis of attraction triggers are universal and do not fit any particular context
[–]BritishBoyRZ 13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
This guy is a sociopathic sleazeball I'm sorry. I know guys like this.
One of them acted like my best friend (I never thought he was my best friend he just acted like it because he thought that's how I'd like him?) and ended up fucking my ex girlfriend. What made it worse was that my ex and I and this guy all work in the same office.
He has all the traits you described. Liar, inflates himself, creep, social butterfly (seemingly). These people are fucked in the head and do not have game. This is what makes me believe it was my ex trying to get back at me for breaking up with her (which is funny because the joke's on her).
What they have is patience and a raw sense of IDGAF. It's the IDGAF that some of these basic bitches are attracted to, and these kind of guys will always find a basic bitch that's down, especially at a hostel bar. If he's remotely cute with an IDGAF attitude he'll get laid, eventually.
Real game is when the girl that isn't as easy to pick up wants to cup your balls and suck your cock because you were witty, flirty, and had LEGIT stories that demonstrate your high value.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yes I agree. I would rather go home with someone who I like and I don't really want to play this game just to get trashy stupid girls (unless I'm particularly horny). But I do think there are some good things to learn from this guy. I've made an edit to my post to mention these
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly, thanks for taking the time to write this. I think I got a lot from reading your post and the comments. It's not a behaviour I would emulate personally, but there are bits and pieces that can be incorporated into a healthy approach to women and social interactions. I can take away some of his less toxic methods and use them for good, so to say.
[–]wchimezie 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn lol a similar thing happened wit me a close friend and my ex girlfriend except my friend wasn’t a sociopathic sleazeball like Urs.
So basically you’re saying that “real game” is chasing a woman until you have sex with her, than the sociopath that has more one night stands with hotter girls instead of chasing? Nah I’ll rather be the sociopath then seems easier.
[–]BritishBoyRZ -2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
No that's just you reading my comment how you wanted.
No one said chase. I fully understand what it is to be alpha.
I don't want a relationship and I have one night stands regularly.
I just don't have to be a sleazeball and tell women I want to be the chips they are eating as a way of flirting 😂
I'm actually smart, succesful, funny, and have real stories about real things. I also take advantage of preselection and social status behaviour, the fundamentals are similar to a degree.
He just executes it like a loser and will in turn only fuck loser girls. Still gets laid though.
But the difference is like preschool sports vs major league.
Well to be fair your advice only works on adults. I was in high school I literally graduated and now going to college I’m still faking my success. How can you actually have “success” in high school and travel around the world and be rich unless your parents are rich themselves😂😂 The only way to become popular in high school is to be fake like the guy in the story, talk to lots of people, have status and be aloof, make fake stories and boom. 99% of people in high school have done nothing in their lives, zero. Like the only way to be popular is he part of a sport, good looking or social. Fake it till you make it. Maybe as an adult is different, cause you can actually get true success as an adult.
[–]BritishBoyRZ 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Wrong.
Had plenty of success, if not more success, in school. As I was around more women consistently for longer periods of time.
Success isn't about wealth or travelling (not always), and yes, that carries weight when you're an adult.
However, there are so many forms and metrics for success and being attractive as a young man. You mentioned one: sports. There's also popularity (genuinely popular because you're super funny and are able to make and keep friends that talk highly of you and defend you). Instruments. Being the entrepreneurial guy that makes stuff and sells it or buys stuff and sells it, and is known for it. Make a website. I mean the list goes on...
All I'm hearing are excuses frankly.
You either got the sauce from a young age, or you learn it, or you don't.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
But that’s the thing I learned to get laid in high school from most of the fuckboys that I knew girls where constantly hooking up with. It’s basically shot status, the biggest fuckboy I know doesn’t even play sports, his just very social, and that’s it but his very narcissistic and sleazy. Very similar to the guy described in the story.
You can’t be a successful entrepreneur in high school😂😂 maybe college but still you have to work very hard on that. I don’t think I’ve ever met a successful entrepreneur my age(19). And when I talk about faking success I’m not talking about women that’s stupid I’m talking about faking success so that women things you are high value and they sleep with you that’s what I mean.
[–]67564343tryhrg 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Came across your post and it reminded me of this dude I went to a wedding with who was super similar. Claimed his height was like 5 inches on what it actually was, super into instagram, making a real performance out of his life, white knighted where it was popular (just so that he could get the girl alone), all the stops. He was invited but no one actually liked him.
These people are FOMO incarnate, maybe they're trying to impress their Dads or something, but the quality of what they get is basically near Zero. In other words, a lot of small change. In all walks of life.
If you live so fast you're not prepared to invest in something good you'll never live the good life. There's a real difference between a fraud con pickup guy and a Don Juan.
Also ask these guys to backup their white lies and they explode. It's not sustainable at all and he's probably set to embarrass himself greatly (or likely has plenty already).
[–]converter-bot 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
5 inches is 12.7 cm
[–]James_Cruse 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is a great write up of observations of a successful seducer. If more of us observed natural and successful seducers and wrote about it here, this community would boom. Thanks mate, very helpful.
[–]Nighthaven- 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Most humans you interact with in life are instinct apes (about 2/3).
Instinctive women are all over men who play the 'status card' (the other two being wealth or exceptional looks).
and Instinctive men seeks as many lays/ offspring as possible.
but instinct doesn't favor the average man...
I think all men would benefit from higher social status. It's probably the number one thing that attracts women. It's whether it's fake and women can see through it that matters, but I also think that the more you practice it the more people treat you as high social status and then you actually feel it and become it. Social status is to a certain degree a self fulfilling thing. Obviously you job, clothes, wealth, looks etc affect it too behaviiur behaviour is a big part. But of you can temporarily convince people you are higher social status than you are (talking to lots of people, body language, asserting yourself etc) then they will treat you as such and then you start to feel it more internally.
[–]Nighthaven- 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
They would. There's obviously some delusional internet people who feel privileged to have a woman despite their mega-obvious shortcomings such as disaster-face (in which they do not do anything to treat it) or obviously out of shape, or is the mega-quiet awkward guy in a corner at party - yet for everyone normal/ average: it will just come down fakery. and if everyone fakes, we will just come down a 'pretend world'.
Men lie about their status, connections, assets (also indirectly; ie. fake watches) because at the end of day (most instinctive) women have simple cravings - and this is the most likely way you'll attract a women for mest men.
In real life, for women you do not see naturally often, you have to be a big pretend, whereas on OLD you have to have exceptional looks.
[–]sayitonmyface1 points 5 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
I really like this analogy, could you elaborate a more on this?
[–]Nighthaven- 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Think of it as what kind of behaviour in mate-seeking will most likely evolve the human species (for the evolutionary better, and not invidually - or simply produce most offspring). We're not different from animals, yet with our intelligence with might override basic instincts - yet that is not most people.
ie.
Most commonly: the okay+ looking woman who gets left in her ~30s - when her beauty has started to fade. -now with kid(s), and the man went to go look for someone else younger - but the kids are created, and they'll have the same instinctive genes (like a loop). She thought she was good enough to lock-down a peak man (usually she didn't have any other qualities than beauty).
the woman who seeks out the wife-beater (and keeps staying lol) is just hard-driven by instinct. the kid-bully (might know or not know what he is doing, or may or may not do it for fun) is just driven by instinct to elevate his status.
during high-school/ college: men/ boys forms packs (attacking or passively having an attitude against each other) in order to cheaply elevate their status (since this is the only card you can play at that age) in order to drag women. This is why groups of boys/ men are seemingly hostile to each other, wheras every girl/ women gets along during this period.
This takes a double 180 during age of ~21 when women realize: wait a second, we are all competing against the same (peak) men! - and she'll most likely dislike anyone she doesn't get along with. and men will most likely get along in their field of work (because you would not want to discredit your own workspace/ status) as you're most likely not competition anymore.
You have probably heard of: We say that men think and women feel (in how they operate). - This essentially why seduction works on women, and that's why men are destined to initiate (because women base their reception on how they feel).
[–]KozmoKrish 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I mean, it's a backpacker hostel and everyones pretty much drunk. Not that hard
[–]caveatemptor18 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
This guy is a narcissist and not “successful”.
[–]Gackt1 points 5 years ago* [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
Why narcissism?
[–]caveatemptor18 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Because a narcissist wants a one way relationship.
[–]tommy29016 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Covid 19 don’t slow him down
[–]Redd0202 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This guy sounds like a classic narcissist that doesn't give 2 fucks about anyone but himself. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders so don't waste it and learn what you can but don't stick around. He isn't remotely interested in getting to know anyone or have anyone get to know him in any way, that's why he recovers from rejection so quickly... No investment. This guy is a predator & a bad person. People= opportunity & that is all. If he can't get what he wants from them he moves on to the next victim. Don't not for one second mistake that for confidence because it's not. If you need a calculator and you're in a room full of calculators what do you do when you pick one up, punch numbers into it and it doesn't work? You put that down while reaching to try the next one. It never effects your confidence because everything is reflected on that calculators or "tool". Everyone is a tool to this man in order to get his needs met.... Oh, btw nothing you described about him says success to me & if you think about it all that he really has going for him is how he appears comfortable in new situations with new people. He will only ever have acquaintances because anyone that sticks around sees through his little ruse like you can after watching for an extended time.
[–]Freerz 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There’s some psychology behind what he’s doing though even though based off the breast comment he definitely is a tool bag. Besides social status, he’s coming off confident and masculine which is a turn on for women. He doesn’t care what people think. Also of course he’s not having deep conversations he’s at the bar trying to hook up. People want to have fun conversations not get to really know each other during these times. By not having deep conversations and just have fun conversations it helps his social proof like your saying. The key to getting with women is: be confident, have fun, and don’t take life too seriously.
[–]hunterpua 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
I don't know about you OP but I'm quite sociable and have a bunch of sociable friends and its quite natural for us to be very informal with people we've met only once before, fist bumps and all.
Nobody ever thought of it as cringey. In fact it seems to get people comfortable with us much faster. My guess is if what you were watching felt cringey it was probably because the guy was trying way too hard to make it look like they're close, not simply because he was very informal and was already shooting the shit with them.
I even remember one time when I trolled a guy I just met. Bumped into a friend of mine at a party who spoke a different language but also speaks English and I started speaking to him in that different language in an exaggerated manner, the guy that was with him thought I only knew that language so I kept it up for a while until there was a moment where it was just me and him, then all of a sudden I ask him a question in English.
He was like, "What the fuck man! You could speak English this whole time!" and it was just informal and playful all throughout, to an observer we would look like we knew each other for a long time even though that was the first time we met.
I've also bumped into a friend while I was picking up a girl. My friend thought I was on a date with that girl, not meeting her for the first time.
I don't think theres anything wrong with treating someone as if you've known them for a while as long as you aren't forcing it to look that way.
Yeah agree, I think it's a great way to be to build rapport tbh. I think I didn't like it because it didn't seem genuine when he does it. Maybe that's also partly because I'm not like that and so seems more fake to me than it actually is
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like he really polished his game for picking the low hanging fruit. This wouldn’t ever work anywhere else besides maybe some other bars with the same class of people so it’s not worth considering.
[–]Paltenburg 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's too easily dismissive.
It actually does work on almost everywhere. Fake it till you make it.
[–]love_love_kiss_kiss7 points 5 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Sounds like a douche tbh.
Women love douches
[–]Disturbed_Aidan 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
So: be confident, don’t be self-conscious and talk to everyone.
The thing is, when you said he’s slept with 5 or 6 girls already, I just thought: that’s a great way to get a disease.
It doesn’t appeal to me to just spend my time trying to have sex with every girl.
I want to have sex sure but I don’t want to fuck every girl out there. They’d all have to be really attractive but even then it’s trashy.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I agree, I actually don't have the level of motivation he has. I think it stems from deep insecurity (there are other reasons why I know he has problems like what he was texting one of the girls who I made friends with). I am mostly happy to go home without a girl if I didn't find anyone that attractive but he's needs a girl every night
[–]RProgrammerMan -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Some people are sex addicts.
I'm all set with picking up women this way. This type of behavior is a fading zeitgeist.
[–]anon1880 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like a narcissist
[–]Gackt1 points 5 years ago* [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
Can you expand on that a bit?
[–]anon1880 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I mean how the person traits were described by OP sounds like a sociopath or a narcissist.. you can look into wikipedia for more details
[–]Gackt2 points 5 years ago* [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Oh ok, but not all narcissists are sociopaths though but I see your point.
[–]anon1880 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Of course you are right .... but i stay away from toxic people--i try to spot the traits early on
[–]thrashourumov 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Interesting field observation work and analysis, thanks for this! Maybe I'd be more successful if I wasn't that kind of dude that dislikes dishonesty, arrogance and bs. I wish.
[–]ivan_bato 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This sounds like the movie Dirty Grandpa
[–]jamesatom25 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
He´s italian bro ^^
[–]Tog_the_destroyer 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
He sounds like a piece of shit quite frankly
Sounds like a bitch to me honestly. From what I can see it feels like a needy compulsion to compensate for a low self worth (see lying about his life). He doesn’t believe in himself and therefore must project a better version that isn’t true. And all that fucking and hard work just to get pussy screams validation.
Do not copy this male. You can still be sexual with a woman right away when you are genuine.
[–]sedhazard 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I travel and hostel a lot and live in a big urban centre. Hook ups like this are common to hostels- people on holiday want to get laid and more people who stay in hostels are travelling alone or with one other friend. I think it would be more difficult for this dude to play these same games in a normal bar- which is probably why he plays his games at the hostel!
Yeah fair point. I think he relies on the constant in flow of new travellers becausee otherwise people will see through his bs.
[–]warpGuru 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This guy sounds like a massive fuckboy and while he puts on a big front he probably has an incredibly fragile ego.
[–]crimsonsky5 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Most of comments on here outing this guy where at least he has the balls to go up and be social with people and not give a shit about rejections. Gotta respect that.
Yeah do want to copy those aspects into my game, I'm.auch a pussy in comparison lol
[–]katesprout 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How to: spot an as&hole
[–]sjhorton 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
There's something intriguing about someone who doesn't give a fuck. Whether or not it's an act, only he will ever know!
True! One girl got quite obsessed with him.because she said she couldn't figure him out
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Narcissist
Yes I think he actually has narcastic personality disorder are I looked it up. He needs psychological help for sure (he was also texting a girl he slept with over and over without her replying saying he wants her to tell him she loves him among other things ....crazy, he met her like two days before)
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
What a fucking creep. I don’t need validation from women that badly. Sure, I could learn to be more confident and direct, but I believe in being honest, sincere, and humble. The right kind of women will recognize my qualities.
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
True story. I (32 F) would fuck “honest, sincere, and humble” instead of the aforementioned manipulative creep, every time.
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
Is your name an Office Space reference?
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
No, but that’s a funny movie. Do you like it? Apparently there is also a book of vignettes by that name, and I’ve seen pics of people holding signs at protests that say, “I was told there would be cake.”
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
It’s my second favorite movie. My #1 favorite came out the same year. Guess what it is
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
That was a pretty decent year for movies (not off the top of my head, I had to google). Several I haven't seen yet but have been meaning to, like Being John Malkovich, Fight Club, Cider House Rules... but I'm going to guess... The Matrix?
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Yes! Keanu Reeves is the GOAT
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Okay, I actually haven’t seen The Matrix. I know, it’s basically a classic at this point. I do want to watch it. Maybe it’s on Netflix.
[–]_-__-__-__-__-_-_-__ 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It’s a very special experience. Make sure you watch it on a nice big screen with very good speakers.
Hmm I’m not sure my non-existent home theater system would suffice. Might have to wait until COVID is “over” to find a friend with the proper equipment.
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
(P.S. If we lived in the same area and knew each other better, this is where you could invite me to come watch it at your place.)
[–]sunnywiltshire 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Female here, that sounds so uncomfortable, stay true to yourself, OP.
[–]StevePreston__ 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
What’s a Hostel? Is that what British people call hotels?
[–]digitalwriternow 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
A backpacker hostel he meant, or youth hotel.. You share a room with 3 or more people, in bunk beds usually. Ive been in hostels sharing a room with 10 people, even more. Sometimes the rooms are mixed, boys and girls. Its cheap. A lot of those hostels have the option of having your own room, but you pay a lot. The point of these places is to meet other travelers. Its not as easy to find a girl to have sex with as some commenters here say, but with some effort and perseverance, it can be possible. Usually its for hookups, although I know a girl who met her present husband there...
[–]PattyFlash4MePls 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dude holy shit TLDR of this whole post in one word: PRESELECTION.
what a sad life to live
🥇
[–]speaklastthinkfirst 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Learned.
[–]Mel_gibsoned 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is just bs
[–]inthebackground89 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
His masked his personality for the prize pussy and in the end, end up bitter no really that successful
[–]sammy_thebull 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I feel like fisting someone you’ve met only once isn’t a great idea. Unless they are ok w it /s I think you meant fist bumping ;-)
[–]dourando 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Your observation skills is really great...
It will help you a lot with your game...
What you need to focus on is the good from what you learnt from this guy.
Use the skills he has and better it.
Have genuine conversations with people and approach women.
There's always going to critic what you say or how you say it but learn from it and move forward...
What he tried to do with the lady eating the chips, is escalate the situation to get her aroused, it failed but now he know for next time don't do it again...
We miss 100% of the shots we don't shoot, the more interactions you get yourself in, the better chances you have getting with women...
[–]sjhorton 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Some people are just magnetic!
[–]sedhazard 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
That makes me feel unsafe
“Consensual” is a word created by money hungry lawyers. LOL
What??
[–]VaporWario 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is a great observational write up. But I haven’t seen that many typos since my 67 year old dad first got a smart phone.
[–]Quemony 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Covid - 19 anyone???
[–]hyperion247 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I think the same on a lot of these posts...where is this taking place?
[–]Quemony 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
😂 I wonder too, shaking hands and sleeping with different girls daily?? Are these the lessons we need rynnow??
Rome
[–]hyperion247 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oof...look at that. Life back to normal because people trusted scientists and didn’t have morons telling them it’s all fine.
[–]Johnny_Kilroy 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I don't get the vitriol directed towards this guy. Isn't this forum supposed to be about seduction?
Dude slept with 6 girls in 10 days. He has clearly perfected the art of seducing women using a very specific set of tactics which are clearly extraordinarily effective in that location. When I was single I would have loved to have been able to do that. Save class and character for when you want a relationship.
[–]WasToldTheredBeCake 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
“Save class and character for when you want a relationship.”
It is exactly this kind of attitude that turns women off. Also, people who actually have class don’t stop being classy just because they’re going for a quick hook-up. Part of what makes someone classy is that they demonstrate respect for others and decorum regardless of the situation they’re in. If you’re turning off the the classiness so you don’t waste it on a hook-up, you’re not classy - you’re a poser, and also a dbag.
[–]Hot_Dog_Flavour 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The amount of work you put in this amaze me, thank you mate
[–]Ryaan200 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Idek yo this guy seems wack and kinda needy for wanting all those girls 24/7
[–]Pinkar 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
I read half of it.... You seem to be mad at him for being popular... (talking to people and saying hi to them and talking to everyone is basically the definition of popularity). You should be more like him, say hi to everyone and talk to them...
Finishing reading. You seem very pretty, the way he acts is the way of the world. Be brave and go out, speak your mind instead. Learn fucking Spanish... He was doing you a fucking favor speaking English for you. The world owes you nothing man. Not the girl that went to a bar with you. If she meets another guy there and you are too much of a loser to hold her it's your problem man.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I still disagree with how he acts I'm several ways. I don't agree with trying to fuck people over who you are (pretending to be) friends with.
[–]Pinkar 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What's the difference between being friendly and acting friendly?
[–]Pinkar 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Answer me something... What's the difference between being friendly and acting friendly?
I guess it's how the person feels inside. But tbh I don't think it's bad to try and be friendly to everyone even if you don't feel like it. You will probably find it more natural with time as you practice this. I think the thing the I don't like the most is the fake arrogance and aloofness he gives off when he does it. And also because he seems preoccupied when you meet him with talking to lots of people instead of having a conversation with anyone. I thought he was a bit strange when I first met him because of this and took a slight dislike to him straight away.
It's not really in my personality to be fake, I don't like how it feels and I don't like it when I meet someone who seems fake. But saying that, one could argue that pushing yourself out of your comfort zone or changing your behaviour to any extent (which is needed if you want to improve at anything socially) is a form of being fake. For instance, practicing more confident body language could come across as aloof or arrogant but over time I guess you will get the balance right and it would just seem confident.
And at the end of the day, seeming arrogant and a bit aloof probably helps getting more girls. Eg Not seeming that available because you are too popular to spend much time with any one girl. So maybe I shouldn't dislike him for that, his goal isnt to be liked, it's to get laid.
But trying to get your friends girl, or being rude to girls etc is something I wouldn't do because I actually dont want to make other people insecure. He doesnt care about that obviously but I do and so I don't like doing things which aren't nice to others.
[–]kim0n 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
In a nutshell, girls fall for guys who appear to be "cool" and who can successfully make up a fake social status in front of them. Seriously, men maybe be jerks, but women are quite dumb and fake too.
[–]pua_max 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
All these people shitting on him are wrong. This style of game works, and not just on low-hanging fruit either. Obviously there are bad parts. Drop the sleaziness and the aloofness. The arrogance isn't bad though.
Let me tell you a story. I'm currently working on cold approach because I think that's ultimately more general as a seduction method, but my bread and butter is working venues where people are loosely connected. This can be a bar, but for me it's more so professional networking events and competitions (like case competitions).
I was once at a professional networking event for a top tier finance company (think Goldman tier but not goldman). All I did was walk around and start talking to tons and tons of people, quickly chatting and grabbing their contact info. Soon, I had a network of loose connections within an hour into the event. I then began to gather groups of people. I'd continue to meet new people, but occasionally I'd call out to people I had met previously and make an introduction. Thus, the group around me grew slowly but steadily. I'd also get to know friend groups that were at the event by talking to one guy, then talking to his friends, etc etc. I soon got girls (and guys) telling me "wow! you're like friends with everyone. how is that possible?" The funny thing was that I knew no one before I got there and I had talked to each person for 5 min max. Later, I set up dates with people I had met. I've also made many great friends that I've continued to see for years. I've done similar things at other networking events, various competitions, and other venues.
Why does this work? The core thing is that everyone at these events and venues is kind of anxious and wants to meet people, but has trouble doing so on their own. If you solve this problem for them and DHV at the same time, you'll seem like a god. Easy sociability, strong leadership, and quick connection is the core of social status. Realized social status is already having a group around you. Having these skills gives you potential social status, which in many ways is just as good. People will want to jump on your hype train and go into the social sunset with you. Build this skill and you are golden anywhere you go on this earth.
[–]RepulsiveImportance8 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good story, I will definitely try and be more like this when at social events from now on. I feel like it's actually a good way to make yourself feel more comfortable I'm these environments because after makes some small interactions you will feel like you have met half the people around you. It's also something I've never really even considered when it comes to drawing people to you but I think is an important aspect.
[–]theonlinedatingpua 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Before I break your post down, how is any of the above possible in the age of covid? Where is this hostel? Anyway...
Any old school pua (pickup artist) will recognize this guy, and the tactics he's using. This guy is what's knows as a natural. Self taught, without the inhibitions around women that regular guys have. Pua's try to learn from and emulate naturals. There are some key differences between pua's and naturals, but I'll get to that later.
What your friend is doing by making all these casual acquaintances around the bar, and creating the illusion that he's friends with everyone, is called building social proof and pre-selection. One of the key traits that women find attractive in a man is how much other people like him, and enjoy his company, i.e. being popular. Walking around and having brief conversations with everyone where he seems to know them (fist bumping, etc), creates proof of his popularity. This is one of those cases where the perception of something, becomes the reality, as everyone thinks he's popular and wants to be around him. Social proof goes hand in hand with pre-selection. Pre-selection is basically the idea that you're more attractive to women when they see you in the company of another girl. A girl will observe him talking to another girl(s), and wonder what about him makes her interested. Eventually he will be in front of her, talking to her, and everything she's observed from his previous interactions will help to make her more attracted to him.
A bit of edge to your banter helps a lot, but this guy is pretty crude. It's actually a drawback, as he's coming off uncalibrated at times. It's probably caused him to lose out on some hotter girls with higher standards. Obviously if a girl gets her feelings hurt, or is weirded out, it's a fail...and if it's observed by others it's an even bigger fail. It's a good thing to be bold, and kind of cocky, especially about sexuality. It show's you'll take a risk and say what you want. It's being the badboy. But the result you should get is a laugh, or something that show's a heightening of attraction. But then again, naturals are not known for their tact or strategy.
Differences between Naturals and Pua's. A natural will say and do anything to get laid. Pua's are regular guys who are trying to get better with girls. As such they usually respect the bro code and don't try to backstab their friends. A girl who observes this, especially one with options like your dorm girl, will often be turned off by this behaviour. Your suspicions about all the stuff he claims to be are well founded. It's likely bullshit for the most part. Naturals will lie to get laid. It's one thing to dress flashy, show pics and tell stories that make your life seem more interesting than it really is, it's another thing to pretend to be a fighter pilot. Pua's don't do this.
Hope this helps. Writing this post got me fired up. I'm coming off a long term relationship, and I am waaaay rusty. Let's get it started and make pickup great again =)
[–]pua_max 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Aye bro I’m a fan of this. Get back in the game asap - there’s a lot of women for us to make happy ;).
[–]ichikvichik -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dude , you wrote an essay?jeez
[–]autisticspymaster1 -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As an Autistic person, I made a post recently on r/aspergers that the key to success in a neurotypical world is being a good liar. I guess this is true for seduction as well.
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