Decades ago I graduated with a STEM degree, and as 1 of two women in my graduating class I am incredibly proud to see the number of strong women graduates in my field. From the stories I hear, however, cultural misogyny is still rampant (particularly in 'traditional' engineering fields). What are some STEM red flags that you ladies have experienced? What would you recommend for vetting men in these fields?
The first thing I would ask about are female classmates, even if they graduated many years ago. Were their many females that they went to class with? What was their perception of those women? Red flag responses:
🚩 Any insinuation that those women flirted for grades.
🚩 Any unsolicited "insight" those women's relationships or romantic lives. This is a HUGE red flag for a lack of respect and objectification of women in general. You are asking about women in an acedemic/professional setting, why else would he skip to their sex lives?
🚩 "They had it easier with staff/professors."
🚩 "I was too afraid to talk to them for fear of sexual harassment." Or remembering an of them by a sexual harassment claim alone.
🚩 "I studied with one of them, but things never went further." Went further where? Did things go further with the men you studied with..?
🚩 Resentment over those women not paying attention to them.
🚩 "My girlfriend was jealous of them 😏" So you were triangulating off of women at school/work?
🚩 "They always complained about being around men." Or "there were a few cool ones that were just one of the guys"
There are many other responses that are not red flags: "I honestly don't know, there weren't too many off them," or "they didn't really stand out." One could even go so far as acknowledging the shit that those women dealt with (they did, believe me), because some men seem to have a semblance of social awareness. So what are you STEM 🚩 or men in other fields that are associated with a high degree of misogyny (let's not even get into military/police).
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