When women and men refer to the "friendzone", they are each imagining two very different scenarios, which causes the animosity and confusion over the topic.

danhaas · 2023-02-01T21:05:56+00:00

Fuckzone is the female equivalent of the male friendzone.

The issue is not about friendship or sex themselves, but how one person gets what they want, right now, while the other gets a vague promise that they might one day get what they want.

I usually blame the simp/slut here. The only way out is for them to love and respect themselves enough to not be satisfied with scraps. The fuckboy/princess don't really have a fault if they are honest about the relationship.

TrueEnoughNewsViews · 2023-02-01T21:07:13+00:00

Women know exactly what’s going on. The phenomenon you describe is not women mistaking the definition, it’s women straight up lying to your face. They know exactly why men don’t like the friendzone. They also like the power they get from putting men in there and manipulating them emotionally.

There are a lot of malevolent ladies out there who enjoy the comfort afforded by disingenuous denial.

Ohyarlysmiles · 2023-02-02T09:25:28+00:00

No everyone knows what the friendzone is and the type of relationship it refers to.

There's no confusion.

Being friends with a woman you want to fuck is stupid.

gymbro718nyc2 · 2023-02-01T21:14:57+00:00

Life is so much easier when you take responsibility for your romantic and sex life.

Anti_Thing · 2023-02-02T06:22:03+00:00

I always thought the friendzone is what happens after the guy makes his feelings known & gets rejected.

Sade_061102 · 2023-02-01T22:43:01+00:00

All of these issues will be fixed if you’re just straight up honest oh my god

Perfect-Resist5478 · 2023-02-01T21:48:56+00:00

Is there a difference between your friends of the opposite sex and someone you like, aside from you wanting to sleep with the person you like?

Being “friendzoned” is literally just “she doesn’t want to fuck you”.

Because women are so much more open with their emotions and non-physical intimacy, for the most part they see the difference between friends and partners as “do I want to fuck them?”

You say she leverages your feelings for her own benefit, but she’s not the one being disingenuous. She’s saying you’re a friend, and she’s treating you like a friend. You’re the one who’s being disingenuous by only reserving your willingness to be emotionally intimate with women in whom you want to stick your dick.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2023-02-02T00:27:45+00:00

So most women who "Friendzone" guys know what they are doing. They just don't want to bang the dude and either they are trying to be "nice" about it or they are soaking the guy for attention/resources. Either way it's up to him to nut up, get up, and walk away. You can't be FriendZoned (or FuckZoned, ladies) without your participation.

Guys stay in the FriendZone because they are afraid of rejection, so they do a "Boyfriend Audition" in the (usually vain) hope that Suzy Sugarboobs will figure out that they are "meant to be together." Usually Suzy Sugarboobs bangs a guy who actually expresses his romantic/sexual interest in her, and Captain Fedora gnashes his teeth bc that was "his girl."

Further Reading For Young Lads Who Need To Hear The Revealed Word:

[Trigger Warning for Blue Pills: It's me. You are going to be triggered AF. You are probably triggered just from the titles. Click on links at own risk. "Here there be Dragons" and whatnot.]

Why ‘Assholes’ Get Laid, And You Don’t.

-Being a 'Nice Guy' or a 'White Knight' Are Simply Alternative Pussy-Getting Strategies That Don't Work.

Put Yourself First. Why Being an Asshole is a Good Thing.

-You have to do what's right for you.

Applied Red Pill: Why You Never Want To Be An Orbiter

-Orbiters don't get laid, they just go 'round in circles.

You Need To Harden The Fuck Up

-Hard Men Have Good Times.

tomatosauce32 · 2023-02-02T01:05:02+00:00

You dont have to let her exploit you.Thats your problem if u do. Just express your feelings and if she doesnt feel the same way leave.There is no point in discussing about malevolent women etc. Its ur responsibility to protect urself.Set your boundaries.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2023-02-01T21:23:06+00:00

Women get fuckzoned bc they use sex as a leverage to get into a relationship, but the same time they can always say "no" if they prefer not to have sex without commitment. As for friendzone, imo women already determined who will be friendzoned early on, so I personally don't believe in the whole "expressing what you want early on" completely for this reason.

I see other subreddits blaming men for allowing themselves to be frienzoned, and how women hate being fuckzoned and I don't think its completely accurate. The fuckzone you have much control over and easier to get out of while the friendzone has been preselected and nearly impossible to escape.

caption291 · 2023-02-01T22:52:03+00:00

This doesn't really work online for obvious reasons but in real life asking a woman if she knows if her male friend is interested in her is pretty telling of what's happening. She might dodge the question or even say no at first, but usually if you press them even a little bit they end up admitting that they know.

I don't think women are misunderstanding what men are complaining about. I think women are trying to avoid recognizing an issue that they benefit from.

EventSea8621 · 2023-02-02T00:21:58+00:00

only a woman thinks a guy being in the friendzone could ever be something positive.

learned that mistake long ago.

animorph_fan34 · 2023-02-01T21:50:05+00:00

It is well known by both men and women that most men will interpret innocent innocuous behaviour as flirting or a sexual invitation. That’s why in most/some cases men claiming to be “lead on” cannot be trusted as an accurate source of events.

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14ers4days · 2023-02-02T20:09:04+00:00

The fuck zone is flat-out wrong. No one should ever be having sex with someone they're not interested in comitting to or are at least considering.

Friend-zone is all in the guy's head. If he has those feelings he needs to be forthright about it, or else get the hell away from her. The thought of our male friends secretly lusting after us is actually terrifying to women.

JumboJetz · 2023-02-03T01:08:17+00:00

The thing about close woman friends is that often if they gets boyfriend they don’t want to continue friendship. She will prioritize a serious relationship over you. Her boyfriend very well might want her to not have a close relationship with you. There’s a lot more risk of losing a close woman friend as a man.

MistyMaisel · 2023-02-02T16:17:31+00:00

Sure, but the problem is that most women aren't leading the dude on feeding him slivers of attention, validation, or maybes. Most women just aren't manipulating like this. Like, this is an extremely rare scenario compared to the female take on the Friendzone which is what is happening 99.9% of the time. They either don't know the man has feelings or they've made it clear as gently as they can that there's no chance for him and are waiting for him to accept this or leave.

Unlike your comparison to men "fuckzoning", women aren't being full of shit manipulative narcissists. Men actively admit all over this forum and many others that they lie, mislead, and say pretty things to pump and dump women. And my favourite part is how they pretend this isn't evil to do. You do not have scads and scads of women sitting aroudn talking about them men they're manipulating and bread crumbing to be their friendly stooge. Because it isn't happening. This is purely a cowardly or not-self-loving man's perception of women in like 99.9% of cases.

And I'm sorry it happens to them on some level. Unrequited love sucks. And it sucks not to know how to handle it. And it sucks not to have boundaries. But take the responsibility. She either doesn't know or she's not into you and has tried to make that clear without ruining the friendship. All the rest is in your head. She's being your friend. Decide if you can be friends. If you can, stay. If you cannot, leave.

Ecstatic_Celery7194 · 2023-02-01T22:16:50+00:00

there is no such thing as the ‘friendzone’. if you were truly her ‘friend’, she would be treating you like a real friend aka she would be inviting you out for all kinds of social activities together with her other friends, invite you to da club, introduce you to her cute friends, reply your texts etc. instead what most men are in is not the friendzone, but the ghostzone, where she completely ignores you and ghosts you, and only reaches out to you if she ever needs anything from you. men should stop using the word friendzone, and replace it with the word ghostzone.

SoldierExcelsior · 2023-02-01T23:22:06+00:00

Men friend zone themselves you know in 5 min if a woman is interested in you or just using you as an emotional tampon.

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2023-02-02T17:33:57+00:00

The thing is, these manipulative women that are intentionally using some poor dude to get him to carry her bag or buy her things by being vague about what she wants are few and far between. Does it happen? Sure. Is it very common? No.

However, there are plenty of dudes who pretend they're a woman's friend because they're hoping to get sex/date her. Those guys are just as bad as the manipulative lady and they are a lot more common. Then there are the guys that are just plain upset about women saying ''I'm not interested in you that way, but I'd like to still be friends'', and those dudes are, again, more common than the manipulative she-demons.

And my problem with how some guys talk about the friendzone in this sub, in particular, is that these guys refuse to take any responsibility for their own lives. They like a girl, they let her know, she turns them down and says ''let's be friends''. These dudes will act like this is such a slight against them and how dare this woman want to be friends with them, she's being awful by suggesting that, she's trying to manipulate them, she put them in the friendzone, etc. I've read a few dudes who basically say that a woman is cruel for wanting to be friends with you after she turned you down. Why? You were friends, she wants to remain friends. If you wanted something more, it's on you to decide if the just friends thing works for you or not. If it does, great. If it doesn't, also great, tell her you can't be friends with her and move on. In most cases, guys put themselves in the frienzdone by not having any agency and they just remain friends with the girl, which clearly isn't working for them, and then complain about it.

webernicke · 2023-02-01T22:34:23+00:00

Now, there are many instances where this is indeed the case, but I would argue that most of men's biggest complaints regarding the friendzone refer to a much more insidious situation,

Those are the exact same situation except with an assumption of malice put on the woman for the latter.

I feel like if women made the effort to shift their view of the term from what they immediately understand and consider the other side of this, there would be much less vitriol and anger on both sides whenever the "friendzone" is brought up.

Or maybe men should make the effort to stop assuming the worst intentions in women instead of just bucking up and telling her how he feels.

I've been sympathetic to men for years on this sub dude, but even I can't ignore how unfair your take is.

DXBrigade · 2023-02-04T16:32:59+00:00

The friendzone is just what happens when your feelings for your friend are unrequited. The rest just depends on the people involved, but for some reason guys focus on the worst case scenario. And in the end, women's point still stands, you can leave if you want to.

Snekky3 · 2023-02-02T10:56:23+00:00

That insidious example is hardly a thing. What is a thing is a guy constantly offering favors as a way to ingratiate himself to her. No one is twisting his arm in making these dumb decisions.

Safinated · 2023-02-01T21:36:40+00:00

It is not the scenario, it is the value of sex that is different for each gender

ZeusTheSeductivEagle · 2023-02-02T14:07:52+00:00

That's because there are different versions being played out based on who is involved. These are times where we need better words to separate them. From my observation

Traditional friendzone or the just not right now scenario. Where a man or woman knows this person is into them and dangles that carrot for the attention. It is more common for the man to be the fool in this situation.

Actual nice guy syndrome- Not be confused with how the internet uses nice guy but the actual clinical diagnosis of nice guy syndrome. It's where a guy acts extra supportive and nice believing the person should love them in return and gets irate when it doesn't work. Also very common for young men to do this at least once when figuring stuff out. The female version would probably be the I have a good career why dont you love me girl. Lol

Then you have the people that are normal but feelings develop and now you are in a scenario where both lose a friend or the one with feelings has to suck it up or leave.

Personally I think the last should be considered the friendzone. The first we should come up with a better term and the middle can stay the nice guy syndrome.

badgersonice · 2023-02-02T11:29:18+00:00

Why we as a liberated society consider a friendshit more profound than a sexual relationship?

That's where it starts. But be careful, this particular pill challenges the concept of women's value beyond their sexual appeal, and that string unravels a lot of priviledge nobody wants to address.

launcelot02 · 2023-02-02T19:39:41+00:00

That’s true, but the person’s view who has been used and abused should be counted.

LotBuilder · 2023-02-02T19:53:46+00:00

There is the friendzone and then there is the back burner. I will never be in the friendzone but I have no issue being on the back burner. I have made it clear that all of my intentions are sexual in nature. We can be friends but I am going to try something to be clear that I am not the kind of guy that’s gonna listen to her problems or help her move . If she wants to have a discrete sexual relationship, I have volunteered. Eventually, she will get in a serious relationship and fade away, or she will be in a different headspace and will call to hook up. Might be years after we originally met. You cannot just be thrown into the friendzone, you have to accept that role.

Affinity4186 · 2023-02-02T20:52:20+00:00

Blackpilled men cannot be friendzoned. The bluepill is more dangerous for men than the blackpill ever could be.

Flightlessbirbz · 2023-02-03T20:47:48+00:00

There are many different possible scenarios here, and possibilities for two people to see the same scenario two different ways. It can be anything from “she’s using him” to “he’s only pretending to be her friend to get in her pants” and everything in between. But unless the woman is really leading him on, no man has to put himself in a “friendzone” position.

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