If some young men are genuinely struggling with dating compared to women like them and compared to more attractive men, is that a matter of inequity or inequality?

MyLastBestChance · 2023-09-13T16:45:28+00:00

100% inequality. Fairness has nothing to do with it.

operation-spot · 2023-09-13T17:28:17+00:00

In our society inequality is something we try to fix but we can’t change attraction. Reproduction is not equal and never will be.

WestCombSplit · 2023-09-13T16:45:58+00:00

While inequality implies differences between individuals or population groups, inequity refers to differences which are unnecessary and avoidable but, in addition, are also considered unfair and unjust. Not all inequalities are unjust, but all inequities are the product of unjust inequalities.

Google says you got the definition wrong. Apparently inequity is a form of unjust inequality

WilliamWyattD · 2023-09-13T17:47:31+00:00

This is becoming a semantics game. It is what it is. Call it how one likes. It is based in biology, but not entirely determined by it. Is there inequity and real unfairness? Maybe. It is too soon to tell or know.

It depends on whether current levels of female sexual selectivity have been artificially amplified by modern technology and culture, and if so, by how much? I think it is understood that women should be more selective than men given women's still greater reproductive costs. The question is whether female selectivity has risen beyond what is justified.

Rogue5454 · 2023-09-14T09:10:46+00:00

I don’t get why so many men on here equate perceived attractiveness as having to be with a person who’s “equally attractive.”

People like other people for all sorts of reasons. It’s doesn’t mean it has to be what’s projected to us what “beauty is.”

We all have different preferences.

63daddy · 2023-09-13T16:46:54+00:00

At the heart of this issue is hypergamy which is inherently unequal: It’s a practice or standard that applies differently to one sex than the other.

Whether hypergamy is just or not or is inherent to the human condition is debatable. It’s certainly been the norm for much of humanity, but has also varied in practice from culture to culture and over time. An issue we are seeing in American society is that hypergamous desires are less achievable than they were a couple generations ago, creating frustrations for both men and women when it comes to dating and marriage.

wtknight · 2023-09-13T17:02:42+00:00

It’s mostly inequality. One could argue that there is some inequity in how many men’s educational needs are being neglected. But I think that this has little bearing on actual sexual attractiveness, and that many men just naturally don’t learn how to be attractive to women. It’s an inequality that should be addressed, but it’s not inequity.

Safinated · 2023-09-13T17:05:52+00:00

Neither. It’s a matter of biology

Ohyarlysmiles · 2023-09-13T18:31:20+00:00

Inequity mostly.

The patriarchal system conditions women to reward a fairly narrow range of men with sex.

Cultural conditioning is more to blame for a lot of what we see.

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Bekiala · 2023-09-13T17:08:40+00:00

I would say inequality as it is about biology. Nothing about human reproduction is equal; it is all just so dang different.

obviousredflag · 2023-09-13T17:13:24+00:00

Differences in mating success in humans are typically considered a form of inequality rather than inequity.

Inequality: Mating success disparities, which refer to variations in an individual's ability to attract and form relationships with romantic partners, are generally described as inequalities. These differences can arise from a variety of factors, including physical attractiveness, personality traits, social skills, socioeconomic status, and cultural preferences. Inequality in mating success is a descriptive term that acknowledges the existence of differences in people's romantic and sexual experiences.
Inequity: Inequity, as previously explained, implies a moral or ethical judgment about the fairness of disparities. In the context of mating success, inequity would typically not apply, as these differences are often the result of individual choices, preferences, and various personal characteristics. While societal factors may influence mating patterns to some extent (e.g., cultural norms and beauty standards), these factors are typically not seen as inherently unjust or requiring corrective action in the same way that systemic inequalities in areas like income or education might be.

stats135 · 2023-09-13T18:18:30+00:00

The answer depends on whether you are blackpill or not.

IF you are blackpill you see dating success as being solely determined by height and jawline. These things are genetic, and thus IS natural and inevitable. This is inequality.

Now if you are NOT blackpill, you consider attraction to be more than just physical genetic attributes then it is inequity.

For the sake of simplicity, lets say a man's attraction is weighted 50% income and 50% height. A short man with 100K salary would be a 5/10, a tall man with 0$ would be a 5/10, and a man of average height and 50K salary be a 5/10. Now lets introduce taxes to help the poor of lets say 20K. The short rich man is forced to give money to the tall poor man. The short rich man is now less rich, and drops his attraction to 4/10 while the poor tall man would have his attraction raised to 6/10. Two man that were equal are no longer equal due to taxes, this is inequity.

DoinIt989 · 2023-09-13T18:23:19+00:00

It's a matter of numbers. There are 105 men for every 100 women in "dating age". Obviously some dudes aren't gonna get a bid

An example of Inequality would be cancer rates being higher among 75 year olds compared to 25 year olds

That's not inequality, that's just how the human body works.

MistyMaisel · 2023-09-13T18:40:05+00:00

Comparing the genders dating experience is stupid. Trying to compare people in this way is largely a fool's errand, but a fun one.

With that said, in many of these cases, it's just an observable difference. It is not an inequity or something unjust happening.

It is literally people reaping what they sow in the vast vast majority of cases. In the cases where it would be a true inequity, struggles with dating is the least of the horrors being visited upon those individuals. And they could not be corrected without enacting inappropriate force upon another person.

noach_qayain_ · 2023-09-13T19:19:56+00:00

Once again I truly think this lack of sex for young horny men who don't want to commit to a woman isn't anything new or even of concern. I never once thought that lack of quick sex with hot women was a thing to be concerned about. The more men freak out over not having sex with women the more they give them power. ALSO porn is legit why this subreddit exist, that and the lack of modern day men to commit, economics and of course the absence of religion.

If you worked on your self and just stopped caring about sex then attempted to actually date women not online but in person then you may have a shot. IDT this is an issue TBH. ALSO ONLY Western men and mainly men in America suffer from this B.S.

G0dZylla · 2023-09-13T19:36:29+00:00

Simplified no matter how much we progress as a society at the core we are still animals so there will always be natural selection. only those who can compete can pass on their genes. women are the ones who select and men the ones who compete, women will try to get the best genes for their future son/daughter so they all want an above average/attractive man. the ugly men with worse genes will remain single.

caption291 · 2023-09-14T00:46:07+00:00

Fairer systems existed before and every change that made things worse was a change we as humans have chosen to make and could reverse to a large extent.

So by your definitions of inequity and inequality, The gap between the past and now would be inequity and the gap between the past and perfect equality would be a mix of inequality and inequity.

Roughly speaking i'd say the overwhelming majority of the complaining is about inequity. People that are acting in bad faith will attempt to say there's nothing that can be done...while complaining about how awful it was when something was done about it lol.

Aussielefty · 2023-09-14T03:01:09+00:00

Fairness will never ever be found in dating. It survives on inequality. Look at how we date. We want someone hotter or richer then us

giveuporfindaway · 2023-09-14T17:03:31+00:00

Whatever you want to call it, it's certainly conditional. It's neither inevitable nor a sorting outcome of any invisible moral hand. We have experiments to show this. As an example this is exactly why no men outside of America seek to date American women. There is no "meetamericanbrides . com" website. It's also why women from every poor country outside of America want American men. Under different laws and economic regimes the power dynamic shifts. If there were no safety nets in our society, then women would choose differently. The biggest penalty for most women in the western world is having less attention after 30 and being childless. Most women aren't threatened by this in their 20's because it's inconceivable to them and because they have a predilection to an external locus of control.

SecondEldenLord · 2023-09-14T22:35:42+00:00

Dating is far more inequal and unfair for men than it ever was.

Wolvengirla88 · 2023-09-15T20:22:49+00:00

Definitely not social injustice

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