Do women treat men with no confidence like shit in general?

recyclablebanthas · 2022-03-02T03:11:53+00:00

Do women treat men with no confidence like shit in general?

People with no confidence generally make people uncomfortable because they can tell they are uncomfortable with themselves and often require constant reassurance about basic things that everyone else is learning to cope with themselves.

We barely have enough energy to take care of ourselves, so being around someone who sucks up the energy in the room is exhausting.

That leads to no/low confidence people generally being avoided by others.

JesusAllen · 2022-02-27T17:55:43+00:00

Romantically yea. Sometimes they sympathize on friends level. Like your a sad puppy

Renshato · 2022-02-27T20:11:20+00:00

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jbo99 · 2022-02-27T16:28:29+00:00

80% of the time, yes. A major reason is to rise on the social ladder, show their place, or to just prevent those men from dragging them down with them.

Another reason is that if the man has no confidence, he has little/nothing to offer her so there is not as much of a reason to be polite to these men.

A third and obvious reason is disgust on a sexual level; no need to go further into that.

Caring_Cactus · 2022-02-27T16:29:53+00:00

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Casanova-Quinn · 2022-02-27T19:40:11+00:00

Feels like a lot of women in general mistake shyness for lack of confidence. There’s so many times I’ve noticed women will keep asking me to do stuff for them (switch seats,buy something for them, leave a seat for their friend) and they always use a patronizing tone when doing so, like you would if talking to a child.

MauPow · 2022-02-27T18:57:24+00:00

Not just women

throwMeAwayTa · 2022-02-27T18:07:09+00:00

~~Women~~ shitty people treat ~~men with no cofidence~~ people like shit in general.

NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr · 2022-02-27T18:37:02+00:00

Women or people, in general, treat you how you train them to treat you.

ThatGuy_Nick9 · 2022-02-27T18:06:55+00:00

When you have no confidence, it only feels like people treat you any more shitty than anyone else

Useful_Necessary · 2022-02-27T17:52:07+00:00

No I don’t believe that. Firstly, not everyone can gauge correctly if you are confident or not.

For example, when I was not confident at all a lot of people believed that I was.

Besides, people are not always 100% confident anyway. It is best to stop worrying about being confident all the time. This is almost unattainable anyway. and creates a lot of pressure. Then you will likely berate yourself for not being confident, which in fact lowers your confidence. You will think: I have to be confident, otherwise…In reality no-one notices all that much. People are in their own world and don’t pay that much attention to you anyway.It is best to accept the insecurities and to accept yourself. The right people will like you as you are.

A lot of people are not confident and they are treated well. People can’t mind read. Confidence shows itself in different forms. There is not one way to be confident. For example, a confident introverted person may still be calm and not outgoing. The lack of outside appearances (we commonly attribute confidence to gregariousness and so forth) does not mean a lack of confidence.

It is best not to worry too much about being confident or not and how people perceive it. Counterintuintively this makes you more confident. When you are constantly on edge about how women may perceive (your lack of confidence) you you will likely lose confidence anyway.

2022-02-27T17:31:25+00:00

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lovemidnightrose · 2022-02-28T00:01:19+00:00

My friends like that get an overprotective big sister over it lol. But if someone I love lost confidence, or someone I have feelings for in general, I would do my best to help them build back up. Would I fall for someone like that? Possibly. There are not really any rules to this kind of thing. I know I tend to empathize more than an average person so my answer might not match the rest of the ladies you meet. Best of luck to you and don't be afraid.

Flyguylycan25 · 2022-02-27T17:03:32+00:00

Unfortunately all people to do not just women, men too but yeah I find that most people seem disgusted by Low confidence. it drives me crazy cause those people are only confident of their bravado- as in their confidence has no basis.

akihonj · 2022-02-27T22:27:34+00:00

I'd say yes.

I think back over the last ten years and when I started as a junior developer, I have to be honest and say I truly didn't know shit about developing software, a degree but that's about it.

I recall that to many of the women in the office, yes I was recently out of the army and had that going for me so there would have been a sense of capability there but consequently I was viewed as incompetent at my current job, so thinking back the treatment while civil was pitty, I can say I sort of had respect for the previous job but was given pitty or viewed with pitty as though it was, how best to describe it, the poor dumb cannon fodder trying to make it in the shiny new world where you actually have to use your brains.

You could think of it as yes you fought in war but what have you done for us lately.

Now I'm a lead developer, running my own team, out performing other teams within the company. We're making changes that will take the company forward in massive leaps. I have a certain power and certain responsibilities land on my shoulders. I deal directly with clients and with senior management within the company, everyone knows that I say what I mean and mean only what I say.

People come to me for advice and listen to it. I push ideas through to senior management about alternative revenue streams for the company, get the green light and produce the goods and the rest of the company often has to run behind to catch up.

This all brings a certain confidence through skills and knowledge, knowledge of my field, knowledge of the audience, I'm able to talk with hundreds or ten and get the same outcomes, usually because it's easier just to do it first and talk after when you can show the results.

I can say that I've noticed that some women who have joined the company, that I worked with earlier in other companies, whose career has stagnated now treat me very differently to how they did back then. I've had juniors tell me that women I don't work with who have seen me in meetings or seen me around the office ask about me, who I am, what I do etc.

From the women I worked with there is definite respect, or fear, not sure which. The others I assume I just idle gossip.

freespirit1963TJ · 2022-02-27T18:18:15+00:00

This is a dynamic that is fairly new to the men/women dating/relationship issue. This is a behavior that impacts many other areas in life than relationships. There are many, many workplaces that you will receive scorn if you're confident (men or women). Confident people many times intimidate other's who lack self confidence and/or self esteem. Don't misunderstand there are those who are confident who do abuse other's. I firmly believe that there are people who gain confidence legitimately and those who gain confidence in a superficial manner. The superficial confident person would be someone who grew up in a very wealthy family. Many of them have been coddled and befriended based on the financial status. Back when singles bars were huge, you could walk through and almost immediately identify some factions of people. People who had money, people into the drug scene and quasi-normal. The wealthy ones had a tendency to be the most boisterous and obnoxious.

Practising_Stoic · 2022-02-27T20:10:58+00:00

Everyone does, a man who has low self-esteem or confidence will struggle in all areas of life. Men are measured on their drive and determination to over-come obstacles and carve their own path. Without self-esteem or confidence you can't do any of that.

itzReborn · 2022-02-27T22:02:16+00:00

So how do I get confidence?

-Dr-Krieger · 2022-02-27T22:11:48+00:00

Pretty sure 0 confidence men get shit on in general. Cause it’s like even if the interaction is neutral and beige in nature and the other person (man or woman) isn’t being malicious or negative with their dialogue, those with rock bottom confidence just unconsciously start mercilessly flaying themselves alive like their inner monologue is Ramsey Bolton preparing Theon Greyjoy to become Reek.

NegotiationMedical21 · 2022-02-27T21:15:50+00:00

Low confidence = needinesses

No one likes a needy person

DarkSun18 · 2022-02-27T22:11:31+00:00

You gotta be confident in SOMETHING. Nobody’s required to be confident in everything.

fewbar2021 · 2022-02-28T02:23:51+00:00

Spoiler alert, almost everyone does. People see that and take advantage. Do no harm, take no shit, stand up straight, and be the real you.

Edit: I know from experience :facepalm:

zzzrecruit · 2022-02-28T02:38:55+00:00

I dont treat men with no confidence like shit. I feel sorry for them, if anything. I find it quite sad.

Vladimir_Poontang24 · 2022-02-28T03:23:15+00:00

Unfortunately if a person has no confidence that means that they don't have any love/respect for themselves. It's hard to give someone love/respect when they can't give it to themselves.

Also someone with no confidence isn't showing who they truly are so it's hard to trust them. From what I've seen most/all women have had experiences with dudes being crazy and jeopardizing their safety. If it seems like you're hiding your whole personality then that's a huge red flag and probably makes them think you could very well do something extremely irrational. Being yourself is extremely important for trust and confidence allows you to show others who you truly are.

invaderjif · 2022-02-28T04:06:19+00:00

Everyone treats a man with no confidence like shit.

Children smell weakness and will take advantage.

Dogs/pets aren't going to let some guy with no backbone tell it can't shit on the Playstation.

Random strangers? Definitely going to sense that insecurity.

Your mother...forget it she knows..she knows.

If you won't stand up for yourself, you better be sure no one else will.

SocialKing_ · 2022-02-27T18:52:24+00:00

I don't understand where all these comments of "yes" are coming from.

Women DO NOT treat nice guys and simps like shit, that's literally the opposite of what they're like!

99.999% of women are super respectful and friendly which is why when they turn down a nice guy, they'll always use themselves as an excuse and say something along the lines of "It's not you, it's me." or "You're such a nice guy but I just need time to figure things out for myself." or "I'm just not looking for a relationship right now, but I'm sure any other girl would be lucky to have you."

Just because women don't see unconfident men as a sexual prospect and they subconsciously feel like you're a loser, it doesn't mean that they will go against social norms and be a total bitch about it.

Most unconfident men just feel like they're being treated shitty because they are insecure of themselves and it has nothing to do with what reality is really like.

If you be nice to someone, they're gonna be nice back (in most cases).

However, what tends to happen is that if you're unconfident, you will find yourself being manipulated and used, although you won't realise it. Either that, or women will simply tolerate and want to get away from conversing with you but even so, they will do it in a polite and respectful way.

"I'm just need to go to the bathroom for a minute" is a great example of this.

Actions will very often differ from thoughts and feelings and this is especially the case with women.

Plus, it's not their fault either. After all, attraction is not a choice and nor is being unattracted to someone.

The only way to make a woman feel a certain way is to carry yourself in a particular way and being confident is definitely one, but not the only, feature of it.

KrakenBitesYourAss · 2022-02-27T20:17:16+00:00

In general everyone shits people without confidence like shit, why wouldn't they?

Altec5499 · 2022-02-27T23:43:56+00:00

A man with no masculinity and no confidence is the same as if you’re on a date with a chick and she rips a mad burp and says yo bro pass the popcorn. It’s unattractive

daring_innovator · 2022-02-27T20:33:57+00:00

Yes - Sexual attraction drops by 100% & she will never respect you, ever. DONE.

MentalCelOmega · 2022-02-27T19:08:31+00:00

Yes, they do.

2022-02-27T21:05:43+00:00

if you lack confidence, females especially will treat you like utter dog **** and give less than zero f**** about it

dudes, in my experience, know how easy it is to lose it or how hard it is to maintain it, as a man, and therefore take it easier on you.

TheMorningJoe · 2022-02-27T22:17:41+00:00

Glass_Supermarket_37 · 2022-02-27T23:42:55+00:00

If you're worried about your confidence and it relies on women not thinking you're a piece of shit, this is a you problem and chances are any women you end up with you will end up abusing and women naturally will want to stay away from you because they sense this.

Grow up and make yourself secure. Accept being alone until you're able to be a decent human being to others.

ItzYaBday1103 · 2022-02-27T23:57:48+00:00

How can I be judged for having confidence or lack thereof when some women don’t have enough confidence to even approach me? Hmmm

YummyPanwitch · 2022-02-28T01:06:50+00:00

No but girls might.

Toebone16 · 2022-02-28T01:16:48+00:00

sergeiglimis · 2022-02-28T01:20:53+00:00

They are neutral non-romantically

demonspawn9 · 2022-02-28T01:47:48+00:00

When you have low confidence, you frequently attract the kinds of people who will take advantage and abuse you.

suburbanite · 2022-02-28T01:58:40+00:00

In general, people with no confidence get treated like shit.

BlankImagination · 2022-02-28T02:11:04+00:00

Why don't you ask r/women instead of this sub which is majority men, and people who need help with seduction which requires confidence to pull off well.

Future-Platform8225 · 2022-02-28T02:17:55+00:00

Sad truth, people treat you how you let them treat you. Men, women, both, be who want and let others deal with it.

2022-02-28T04:00:59+00:00

Exactly. If you need to talk, find a friend. If you wanna fuck her she can’t see you crack

Title	Do women treat men with no confidence like shit in general?
Author	warrior641
Upvotes	268
Comments	106
Date	February 27, 2022 4:13 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/t2rhx3/do_women_treat_men_with_no_confidence_like_shit/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/do-women-treat-men-with-no-confidence-like-shit-in.1265776 https://theredarchive.com/post/1265776

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