As background: I am five+ years divorced from my second wife. Marriage lasted less than 5 years, she was an alcoholic, diagnosed BPD (that was kept from me), and attempted to have me arrested, fired, and completely removed from our son's life. I discovered during our marriage that she was playing me, primarily for money. She was being coached by her mother and sister, who thought that a short-term marriage would result in a free house, plus a lifetime of alimony and child support. We now coparent 50/50.
Now, don't get me wrong, my ex did well for herself in the divorce. Despite her misunderstanding of the modern divorce process, she played me pretty good. She came into our relationship with zero assets and a $50k a year job, she walked out with about $250k in cash and $1500 in child support for the next 13 years. Now, for most people, that would have been life-changing, and certainly would have set them up for a decent future. Not her, though. She didn't work at all during the first two years post divorce, partly because she didn't want to let go of the SAHM lifestyle, but also because I think she assumed another man would be along shortly to provide for her needs. She also sold the perfectly good, brand new car she took off me in the divorce and bought an Audi....because her friends also had nice cars. When staying home didn't work out, she stated working part time, but still grossly underemployed. She also decided to go back to school..........to become a therapist. Not a real school, mind you, but an online school.
Fast forward to today. She assumed she'd be working in a private drug treatment facilities with wealthy people, but those jobs didn't materialize, so she's having to work in a women's prison. Not only is the money not very good (she could work fast food and take only a slight pay cut), but apparently the divorce money has run out. And that should be a rewarding moment for me, but it's having an impact on our son. Suddenly, he has no shoes at her house other than the ones I provide, and she can't afford $35 a month for her portion of the drum lessons he's been begging for. She owes me money for child care, and is basically telling me she's not going to pay. And she has no humility about this......preferring to let our son believe he's doing something wrong by asking for things like a normal kid. She won't do anything fun with him, because having to work 8 hours a day is too much for her to handle.
I just thought I'd share, and I knew this group would appreciate a post-divorce story. I knew she's likely crash and burn, and now it's playing out.
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