Now, while I can’t link you them, I have certainly seen the studies that indicate that a child that grew up in a broken home or with poor familial values will be much less likely to have a successful marriage / relationship themselves. The same goes for if they experienced any sort of severe child hood trauma or if they had a dysfunctional family.

 

A lot of people model what a relationship based off of what they experienced as a child, with the primary example of a relationship being that of their parents. If the parents are monogamous and have a good relationship with each other as well as with their children, this is going to be much more indicative of whether or not their child will be a good partner to another.

 

I’m sure there is also a correlation between n-count and family dysfunction, but it is not a one size fits all kind of thing. The presence of religion and importance of purity in a child’s life must also be considered because a lot of behavior is only considered “disordered” if it deviates from the culture and values they were raised with.

 

If a child comes from a sex positive family, you can expect that they will have more sex than one that preaches waiting until you are married. Thus, it’s be a bigger red flag for the one with the religious upbringing to have had a lot of partners than for the non-religious one. You might even go so far as to say if the woman from the sex positive family didn’t start having sex until later on , that might raise some flags.

 

Based on my personal experience, I come from a very happy, liberal, sex positive family, however I have a much lower n-count than my sister. However, she is the one that has had successful long term relationships with good men, despite the fact that she had some fun while in college. I, on the other hand, didn’t have sex until nearly 24 (I’m 24 now) and, while I would never cheat, I have much less relationship reliability.

 

Similarly, most men and woman I know that ended up in successful relationships ALL have great relationships with their parents and their parents with each other.

 

The issue with this notion, however, is it is entirely out of our control what family we are born into and no one wants to think they should be put at a disadvantage for something that wasn’t their fault. Well, that’s just reality. Life isn’t fair. The same harsh reality is true for sexual assault victims and people with mental disorders or diseases

 

That’s why we like to claim things like n-count are directly responsible for relationship reliability, but that is just so far from the truth. Things like the values they were raised with, the “image” of a relationship that has been imprinted in their brains, their work ethic, their relationship with their parents, and the like are vastly more important in determining relationship reliability.

 

Wanting a partner with a low n-count is fine, but it is dishonest to act as though it is the most glaring indicator of how they would be as a partner, when with most people it’s a preference rooted in insecurity or ego.

 

PS: we didn’t evolve to be repulsed by verbally transferred information so pls drop the bs that we are biologically inclined to be disgusted by a NUMBER or a WORD, something that humans invented very, very recently. We do not inherently know how many men or women someone has slept with. We can only see indicators that they are capable of bearing children (youthfulness) or of protecting (strength, size, masculine features). Men also do not inherently know that women have a hymen or what it even looks like.