LVM??

Soulsalts · 2020-03-19T21:53:14+00:00

In my experience, any man who says 'nice guys finish last' is bad, bad news. He hides his ugly nature under the guise of nice guy, but then he "throws a pity party" when people don't give him prizes for wearing the correct mask. You are not wrong to be put off by this. Listen to your gut.

dzgata · 2020-03-19T21:33:05+00:00

Yes it is a LV response and he is a LVM. And if I were you, I’d quit while I was ahead. Dump him. Seriously. He’s a self proclaimed nice guy and he was frustrated with YOUR choice, if that’s not a red flag I don’t know what is!!

lival42 · 2020-03-19T21:43:46+00:00

This "you did it once so you never get to say no to it to anyone for the rest of your life" shit is exactly why it's never a good idea to talk about what you did with your exes.

2020-03-19T21:34:14+00:00

Yes that’s a very low value reaction and it’s a sign of larger issues. It’s called retroactive jealousy. It shows he has a Madonna-wh*re complex and he’s insecure. He’s not a nice guy because he was trying to make you feel guilty. Actual nice guys don’t have to tell people they’re nice. He has ‘nice guy’ syndrome and it’s highly likely he will hold this against you and bring it up in the future if you move forward with him. Cut your losses now.

aclumsygirl · 2020-03-19T21:54:14+00:00

"He asked if I had ever had sex with someone who was not my boyfriend."

Ughhhhh. Low value all the way.

Next time: the response is to smile in a slightly puzzled way and say, "why do you ask?" Shame him into changing the subject.

siberiansummer · 2020-03-19T21:34:17+00:00

It’s kinda both. Generally, if you have to question it it’s already not good. Secondly, yes it’s the culture nowadays. Women allowed such behavior and now men think it’s ok. FDS is to raise the bar! Don’t cave into societal expectations. Rather be single than settle

radical__daphne · 2020-03-19T23:08:30+00:00

What an asshole!

First of all, you shouldn't have to tell anybody that you won't have sex before commitment, you live it. If they try anything you throw them away. Second of all, he asks for personal sexual information you tell him no. It's was only so he could use it against you. What's next? Is he going to ask if you've ever been raped and then guilt you into letting him rape you also? LVM

throwaway23004345 · 2020-03-19T21:56:51+00:00

Yes he’s lv. Be happy you didn’t sleep with him.

ldnsurvival · 2020-03-19T21:59:09+00:00

What does he need to process? So what if it's not the norm; he's a grown man and should see you as a person and not just a personification of your sexual pursuits. I feel like you already know the answer here.

FodderFigureIllushun · 2020-03-19T23:55:37+00:00

If he's whining about not being able to have sex with you unless you have a relationship, then yes, low value.

Even though it's your truth, he's not entitled to know anything you did in your past because it doesn't concern him. He asked if you were intimate with someone who wasn't your bf to evaluate where your boundaries lie. That means he already sees you as someone with flexible standards. In this case, I would forget about him and keep dating others.

vp2407 · 2020-03-19T23:56:45+00:00

So you communicated your boundaries and he threw a tantrum? Lmaooo he can go cry about it

Radiant_Success · 2020-03-19T22:15:52+00:00

Girl, he's having a pity party because he doesn't want to make things official and doesn't want to be your boyfriend.

Offensive and insulting.

teeteereads · 2020-03-20T00:33:16+00:00

Your feelings are 100% valid. You expected more and got basically nothing of value in return. Grief the loss of this guy, but keep standing by your completely reasonable standard you set for yourself.

You said: I did this thing, it felt harmful to me, and I learned I do not want to do that again because it does not make me feel good. Why on earth should anyone QUESTION that? A person who cares wouldn’t make you question your pain.

moosecakies · 2020-03-20T02:39:53+00:00

It’s low value in my opinion. ‘Awww but you let OTHER guys do it and now I HAVE TO COMMIT. WAAAAAAHHHH!!! It’s not fair! I was really just hoping for friends with benefits ‘

Pshhhh ‘nice guys finish last’. My f*cking ass. Twat.

Anniealmighty1 · 2020-03-20T05:03:21+00:00

Yes, he's LV. But a word of advice? Never tell them you'll have sex "when it's official." Say I'm not ready yet. That's it. Saying when just gives them a way to manipulate you. Don't say when you think you'll be ready

cirrus_cloud · 2020-03-20T06:03:34+00:00

Yes he is low value, but GURL. You DO NOT owe any scrote a peek into your sexual history. Get on your queen shit!

Don’t ever feel pressured to share about your sexual history.

SslimReaperr · 2020-03-20T09:03:33+00:00

Nice guys finish last? Okay, then he doesn’t need to “finish” at all.

Kekekeke7777 · 2020-03-20T03:32:03+00:00

Watch him pretend to make things official so he can sleep with you then ghost you after

sadpourtoujours · 2020-03-20T02:24:48+00:00

Are you really asking if he’s LV after hearing his response??

timetofliptables · 2020-03-20T11:16:29+00:00

I entertained a guy like this long before FDS. He got more and more insistent and whiny, even suggesting I had sexual issues I needed to go to therapy for, (not even my bf yet, mind you!) until I finally wisened up and blocked him everywhere.

This will not get any better if he already feels entitled to sex. That means he cares about getting some more than he has ever or will ever care about you as a person.

Merunit · 2020-03-20T13:51:46+00:00

Sorry, I didn’t get it, did he expected to have sex without being her boyfriend?...

I mean I’m not shaming women who enjoy casual sex if this what rocks their boat. As long as they love it and are not hurt.

But I would be just confused by a guy who would assume it’s okay to have sex before we are officially and exclusively dating (if we theoretically are both looking for a long term relationships).

grimreapersdtr · 2020-03-21T01:28:47+00:00

Idk, I expected a different response. I feel angry and a little disappointed.

He was low value for digging into your past and pouting that he wasn't going to be the one to win a notch on his belt for "popping her cherry". That "nice guys" means he hangs out on the toxic manosphere.

Title	LVM??
Author	Moonies9
Upvotes	54
Comments	34
Date	March 19, 2020 9:27 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fli75d/lvm/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/lvm.679913 https://theredarchive.com/post/679913

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