Reminder: this is the bare minimum.

pumpkin-pied · 2021-07-08T03:36:56+00:00

Yes! I've had so many friends excitedly BRAGGING to me that their new boyfiefie "folds his laundry omg" or "vacuums every day". Girl that's the bare minimum 🙄

mamadgaf · 2021-07-08T03:48:39+00:00

I used to get shocked stares back when I was married and I would mention that my ex-husband had to do his own laundry. It’s because he always complained when I did it so I refused to do it anymore. They couldn’t believe I made him do this! I would just tell them that we both work full-time and he’s a grown up, he can do his own laundry. Meanwhile I did all of the kids’ laundry and pretty much all of the rest of the housework, child rearing, etc.

hopeless_romantic19 · 2021-07-08T04:05:06+00:00

Seriously! 🙌🏼 I recently dumped a guy I was dating. Sort of a Covid fling but this guy had the worst hygiene. So gross! He didn’t even have hand soap in his bathroom. He smelled horrible. Ordered takeout every meal. Followed a bunch of IG thots and pornhuh was his top website. Honestly sad and I stayed around with him for too long out of sympathy. But it feels so good to be hasta la vista!

spiderunderweb · 2021-07-08T04:24:43+00:00

Yes we do not praise normal behaviour

AngryTiger69 · 2021-07-08T04:56:26+00:00

Can also add to the list

responds to phone calls and text messages in a reasonable time frame
is respectful to your parents, friends, and family
prioritizes your orgasm and pleasure during sex
isn’t jealous nor controlling

BBQCoolRanchQueen · 2021-07-08T11:36:23+00:00

Exactly. Bare minimum doesn't guarantee he's a HVM. I've dated one such scrote. Well groomed, showered daily (sometimes twice), clean and well decorated house, cooked healthy meals, decent paying career, two well cared-for and well-loved pets, seemingly "in touch with his feelings". He turned out to be one of the biggest emotional manipulators on the planet.

nnanna11 · 2021-07-08T10:39:05+00:00

i’ve noticed that pattern with the ‘green flag’ posts. of course you should be happy you’ve found a guy that appreciates you, but praising the bare minimum like him cleaning after himself is strange. we should not be holding grown men to the same standards we have for children. my younger brother (10) is capable of doing a lot of chores on his own and maintains good hygiene. grown men are not children. they should not be praised for doing basic life skills

Big-Respond8481 · 2021-07-08T12:23:25+00:00

Add to the list:

Takes care of and raises his own children, this includes making them lunch or dinner, dress them, braid his daughter's hair nicley, take them to the hairdresser, make appointments for them, drive them to school, help them with homework.

SpiritualPlan5 · 2021-07-08T13:30:34+00:00

I had a man who cleaned all the time. Because he refused to work or pay for anything so he felt that was his contribution. I am disabled and only work part time. I don’t need a househusband I needed a partner. Or I needed him to get out.

MixWide · 2021-07-08T12:59:13+00:00

I would add:

Refrains from exploiting women for sexual gratification (i.e. no pornography or use of prostituted women)
Has a skill set that will allow him to support himself
Obtains routine health and dental care as appropriate for himself

fireforestfairy · 2021-07-08T11:11:06+00:00

You're right. Maintaining personal hygiene is something they should have learned in primary school and we should expect all guys to be capable to doing this. It's not that different from employers expecting you to know maths you learned in primary school. It's not a stellar quality but a minimum requirement.

camille_san · 2021-07-08T13:36:58+00:00

I really needed this message today. Cute guy told me I’m pretty and I caught my mind slipping.

TumbleweedForeign699 · 2021-07-08T15:09:57+00:00

Literally. Some men do this and think they need medals and trophies when it’s like… the bare minimum.

I think the bar i want to raise in my next relationship is ~

-isn’t in love with his mommy

-non toxic, normally attached mommy (my X’s belonged in the JNOMIL sub)

-can drive and has a car (I drive and I want to be driven around not the other way around!)

-can cook good food. My exes could get by but I certainly wouldn’t enjoy eating their food made from scratch..

-good haircut and knows how to style their hair

-decent hairline

Etc. not an exhaustive list and deffo want more but like.. these things to me are ground rules

IndigoTR · 2021-07-08T14:12:38+00:00

“Unhappy zoo animals” lmfaoooo 😂

AudQueen · 2021-07-08T18:03:40+00:00

Also treating you like a human being by respecting your needs, thoughts, opinions and boundaries.

The bar is so low that I have to catch myself from gasping when I meet a man who is respectful, takes care of himself physically and does what he says he will do. This is what a lot of women (myself included) do on a daily basis. This should not be celebrated. *sigh*

BasieSkanks · 2021-07-08T19:55:27+00:00

I saw a post on here the other day that was praising for a guy for offering to take an STD test before having sex. This is the barest of minimums!

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