Does your ex still haunt your dreams?

roshi-roshi · 2024-08-29T21:36:32+00:00

Yes. I’ve been having an awful recurring dream where I attempt to talk to her, but she’s not available. I wake up in a semi panic attack every time. I think it’s indicative of how much she never listened to me no matter how hard t tried to communicate. Ironically, she was the one that said she felt rejected.

curiousreader82 · 2024-08-29T12:32:19+00:00

I still think abt her and the way she cheated on me. It has gotten better, but there is still a lot of resentment.

upvotersfortruth · 2024-08-29T10:34:15+00:00

She doesn't need my dreams, I see her every other fucking day. /hashtag coparenting

UglyDude1987 · 2024-08-29T07:46:57+00:00

Yes, but less than the initial few months.

Zealousideal-Let1344 · 2024-08-29T03:11:40+00:00

On occasions yeah, she shows up in my dreams. But seriously I fell out of love with her years ago so it's not like I have a ton of regret

Top-Pop-2624 · 2024-08-29T02:20:24+00:00

Was married 42 years. Can't say she's in my dreams but think about her every day. Probably will the rest of my life. I don't dwell on it anymore. She made her choice s.

Ok_Thing7777 · 2024-08-29T01:43:01+00:00

Every night....it's madness. My heart is broken night after night....

WittyBeautiful7654 · 2024-08-29T00:03:12+00:00

Only sometimes, I wake up not knowing where I am. Even outside a couple times. It's always these dresses about everyday. I've got both my ex wives mixed up in there. Here their voices sometimes can even smell their perfume. It's awful and it fucks my next day up.

GaeasSon · 2024-08-28T22:04:00+00:00

Yes. She keeps showing up. I'm always surprised to see her. The dreams are never focused around her, but she's a recurring background character more than she ever was while we were married. (Shrug). Brains are weird.

Positive_Rub_6696 · 2024-08-28T21:41:50+00:00

I’ve been sober and divorced over 6 years. I sometimes have dreams that entail some element of drinking. Not often, but from time to time. Dreams where my ex is in it? Not once 👍🏻

buckbolt93 · 2024-08-28T19:03:24+00:00

No never really did, I left her because I was done and wanted to go.

Southern-Necessary90 · 2024-08-28T18:42:40+00:00

Yes, but primarily because she has an “anonymous” podcast she does with her hairdresser where she talks shit about me and everything I supposedly did wrong. I haven’t been able to find the podcast but I know that people in her circle listen to that garbage

No-Marsupial1823 · 2024-08-28T18:40:34+00:00

Yeah. It’s because it’s on our minds or in the back of our heads. But one day it will be no more. I’m sure if it.

pokeraladin1 · 2024-08-28T18:36:54+00:00

First few months, yes. Now I can see her and don't give a fuck..

Pretend_Radio_4164 · 2024-08-28T16:21:13+00:00

My ex is a 1 out of 10 on my radar. I'm curious how she's doing. But it's a vindication thing.

It's the girlfriend who haunts me. I dated after the divorce. I fell head over heels for a beautiful girl. And that relationship was dream like. She was the most functional well put together woman I've ever met. We dated a year before breaking up. The breakup killed me.

Several-Eagle4141 · 2024-08-28T16:10:33+00:00

Just my conscious life

HoneydewLeading7337 · 2024-08-28T15:43:24+00:00

Less often than before.

The last dream I had with her, she was trying to have sex with me and I realized there is no way in hell I would sleep with someone who fucks around as much as she does.

So that's progress.

cactuscharlie · 2024-08-28T15:18:21+00:00

Yes.

I call it involuntarily dreaming. It's not a nightmare, but upon waking, my day is ruined until I snap out of it.

I have dreams where I catch her fucking someone and she smiles and laughs at me.

I've had dreams where we get back together. These are the worst, and my first experiences with lucid dreaming: the first half is all about happiness at getting back together, and then I start noticing things. Slowly realizing this isn't real, and then I wake myself up and I'm in full depression mode for hours.

Recently though, I've had dreams with random "strangers" that all include some sort of "tits" theme. I really welcome these dreams!

ABBucsfan · 2024-08-28T14:05:24+00:00

Honestly no. She might have appeared in one dream since she left four years ago. For that first year and a bit of second I did have dreams about the first girl I ever loved I'm high school. The one that got away. I think my brain was going back to a simpler, less traumatic time. I've been told the brain can do that in response to trauma.

Classic_Dill · 2024-08-28T14:03:28+00:00

Definitely does not haunt my dreams, she’s just one of my life’s largest regrets, wish I would’ve never of met her. Would love for her or just not to even be in the picture, considering I’m basically a single parent because she dropped out a site along time ago, I think it would be easier on my children if they could only focus on one parent.

Subtle-Catastrophe · 2024-08-28T12:46:38+00:00

Yeah. I still have dreams where she's still just my wife, or the person going with me on vacation, or whatever.

It's not even wistful, that relationship was awful (although it lasted from my early 20s through my mid 40s). I want to kick my subconscious in the balls, sometimes. I'm moved on, I'm in other relationships, whole new family. I don't even miss her. GTFO.

JustAnotherBoomer · 2024-08-28T11:55:30+00:00

Mine does sometimes. I think of it as her revenge for not loving her. In my defense, I did thoroughly like her early in the marriage.

Miserable_Ad_1172 · 2024-08-28T11:16:09+00:00

I have had dreams of her being with someone else for a while on and off, maybe 5-6 times in total. Finally she has met someone and my greatest fear from the day she left 2 years ago is true. With help from friends,family and this group I have spent the last few days processing the fear of this now being reality. I will get back up and move forward even stronger than before. They don’t want you, they chose to be with another. The more you conquer the fears in reality the less you will dream or have nightmares about them. This is the only path to getting better OP. Stay in the grief and feel it all but do not let it consume you, as it nearly did me. I promise the darkness in those dreams will pass. It’s normal and we are all hear to listen.

icemountainisnextome · 2024-08-28T10:51:08+00:00

Sleeping or awake, doesn't matter. I'm always thinking of her. How she gave up when I believe we could have worked on it.

savage_cabbages · 2024-08-28T09:51:46+00:00

No, how long has it been OP? Sounds like you're still processing and healing, which ultimately means becoming your true self. You've broken free of the shackles and it's ok to have dreams (maybe nightmares) that have your ex as a character. It could just be representative of someone/something else also going on in your life.

Exactly65536 · 2024-08-28T09:31:37+00:00

I had this dreams for about 2 years after the (first) divorce.

Some dreams in which I was still not divorced, still in the process - extra cortisol on waking up. And then dophamine, realizing it's just a dream and I'm actually free.

Title	Does your ex still haunt your dreams?
Author	Dramatic-Ad7192
Upvotes	14
Comments	28
Date	August 28, 2024 9:08 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1f35k0e/does_your_ex_still_haunt_your_dreams/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/does-your-ex-still-haunt-your-dreams.1528643 https://theredarchive.com/post/1528643

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