Do men really get better with age? Aren't you more likely trying to dodge the creepy label than be a stud with younger women?

fathergoose77 · 2023-07-31T22:59:02+00:00

Some people age well - usually those who take care of their bodies with a nutrient rich diet, get exercise, protect their skin from sun damage, etc. Basically the stuff your primary care doctor tells everyone to do for health’s benefit. This isn’t gendered.

I’m in my 30s and so is my fiancé. We’re at similar life stages and I feel like we understand each other well. I enjoy conversations with people our age and can relate to them much more than when I am talking to younger folks. I would rather be single than have a relationship with a <25 year old, no thank you. They seem like children in my eyes.

While there are a variety of reasons why some dudes might try to date young women, usually when I see that crap on Reddit it’s because some dude who feels insecure about himself is trying to justify going for very young women who don’t know how to identify a healthy partner. Or they believe that the younger their partner, the more impressive they will seem to their male peers (which is also immature and points to insecurity).

I don’t see those dudes as “studs” at all, so I guess that answers your question.

Downtown_Cat_1172 · 2023-07-31T23:32:21+00:00

Women usually prefer guys close to their own age. The phenomenon of women who date older rich men is real, but those women are looking for transactional relationships and aren’t going to be the ride-or-die types.

HelenHavok · 2023-07-31T23:12:23+00:00

I think you’re conflating “getting better with age” and “being able to score much younger women.” They aren’t meant to be intrinsically linked. In theory, men get better with age because they mature. They gain confidence and experience (in careers, in people skills, in the bedroom, etc.). They tend to be more emotionally and financially stable. They know what they want and don’t dick around to achieve it. These characteristics are going to be attractive to women around the same age, because we go through the same maturity changes, and also attractive to a minority of younger women who specifically seek out older men for these traits. The vast majority of 20-30yos aren’t looking to date someone who looks like their dad and 99% of the time, if you hit on them, you’re going to be a creep. Young women who are interested silver foxes will find them online and irl. Leave the rest of them alone.

TopIncrease6441 · 2023-08-01T03:49:55+00:00

Omg. Tell me why I was coming her to post a video into this sub on this topic and this is the first thing I see😭😭😭😭

My take:

It’s a coping mechanism. As a woman in my 20s I can tell you that there’s no abundance of women looking for an older guy to love, they just want to chop money. They make it very clear that if the money dies they’re gone. We laugh about it but it’s the truth.

The 2nd kind of girls are usually self sufficient. They would definitely like to be spoiled by their man but they’re not so desperate that they would be with an old man. They’d much rather be with someone their own age or single as they aren’t reliant on a relationship status to feel fulfilled.

The 3rd girl is just as she was in highschool. A low self esteem, low maintenance, pick me with daddy issues. Needing to be cuffed in order to feel loved. They usually have a look. Any older guy can get this kind of girl because they’re super desperate.

The gist of the story is that there will be no true love. You’ll be buying an actress or picking up a desperate pick me and I know men. They want a girl who WANTS to be with them because they WANT to be with them. Not because they don’t have another option, financially or mentally, because that’s what all people want. True love.

Red_Trapezoid · 2023-07-31T23:35:18+00:00

It's just an attempt at mass gaslighting.

tinyhermione · 2023-07-31T22:59:01+00:00

A lot of guys do better with women in their late twenties/early thirties than in their early twenties because they gain confidence, social skills, hobbies, friends and careers.

But that's about it. Everyone gets older. Young girls don't want fifty year old men to hit on them. You are right, it just seems creepy and delusional.

mammajess · 2023-08-01T07:20:16+00:00

People (men or women) who work on themselves become better partners with age and experience. But that doesn't mean 20 year olds are interested with 30-40-50 year olds.

baiser_vole · 2023-08-01T01:01:46+00:00

I used to talk to my friends about the old creeps that approached me on the streets, at restaurants, and etc. Yes, I called them creeps. No, I do not dress provocatively.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2023-08-01T11:13:21+00:00

Dating gets better for men if you've taken care of yourself physically and done well in your career. And you are interested in women roughly around your age rather than the same 20 something women who could be your daughters.

no_user_ID_found · 2023-08-01T13:03:55+00:00

Great wines age well, awful wines become even more unbearable.

CauliflowerElegant76 · 2023-08-01T01:59:22+00:00

As a 23 year old female, respectfully, old dudes are not attractive to me. And by old, I mean 35+.

DMD12345 · 2023-07-31T22:56:42+00:00

Depends. If a man keeps up his appearance (exercising, dressing well, and keep up his grooming) then it would be possible for a man in his 30’s (likely early 30’s that is) to get with women in their early-mid twenties. But once a man hits his mid-late 30’s-early 40s, women in their mid-late twenties is usually the youngest he’ll be able to pull. Most women in their early twenties will not want to be with a man that much older than them, as they will most likely feel the expectations that man will have of them will be too high and don’t want to be under that kind of pressure when they’re that young.

AntiVictimhood · 2023-08-01T16:09:15+00:00

I think the only truth to this is that older men tend to have more money and resources which is important for women who are wanting a bigger family and a more traditional life.

And as a woman, if you're looking to start a family and want to be a SAHM with your children when they're young, it's remarkably hard to do this in this day and age given the cost of everything. So for women who really want that kind of life, the advantage to dating a bit older (aprox. 5-10 years) is that older men are more likely than men your age to be financially stable and more advanced in his career. consequently allowing you to be the involved parent and home-maker you want to be. This dream is less realistic if you're dating guys who are in their early-mid twenties and just getting started.

Additionally, IME men mature more slowly than women, so I think some women also see dating an older man as an advantage in that way as well.

There is definitely a point where age gaps become creepy as you stated. It's one thing to be a 35y/o guy and marry a 28y/o woman. But to be a 40+ y/o guy dating a 20 y/o woman begins to get creepy. I used to work in nightlife and the 40+ guys who come and hit on women in their 20s were not the mature financially stable guys that some young women are looking for. They're moreso the guys who haven't grown up, are still emotionally immature, and are desperately trying to live out this youthful fantasy that they never had or are too afraid to grow out of.

I'd say men can be more attractive when they're a bit older due to the maturity/financial element, but that is not universal and there quickly comes a point where it's not true. It's not like men become exponentially more attractive over their lifetime. People who are in good health and who have good genetics will age better than those who don't, it's not about sex.

carritotaquito · 2023-08-01T04:45:57+00:00

Judging by the hundreds of posts from men my age and older posted on r/dating_advice r/datingadviceformen and the insane number of subilmissions I've posted on r/niceguys (again, most, if not all) by dudes my age.

So no. Age ALONE won't make a man more attractive. If he didn't invest time in skin/hair care, exercise, and becoming financially stable, he's worse off than a fat woman of any age.

sturgeo123 · 2023-08-01T14:44:06+00:00

It’s no shame in getting older for men or women. That being said u typically want to date ppl in ur age range

SufficientDot4099 · 2023-08-03T01:29:51+00:00

Brad Pitt, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Johnny Depp are not attractive anymore, despite being more attractive than most men their age.

OptionNearby928 · 2023-08-01T08:31:55+00:00

No. That's one of the biggest lies of the manosphere.

We naturally deteriorate looks wise almost as fast as women. By our early 30s, most men are "hitting the wall" too.

We do have some advantages though:

- Some subtle signs of ageing can make us look more rugged, manly and experienced which are attractive traits for a man and can compensate for our loss of beauty

- Muscles are one of the main aspects of being good looking for a man and we can get bigger muscles than most 20something year olds in our 30s and older

- Looks are just one of many components of what makes a man attractive. We will lose some of our looks but can gain money, status, confidence etc as we age.

If you've grinded throughout your 20s on money, game, status, body, style etc, you won't see results straight away but your hard work will start to finally come together and pay off in your 30s. That's what these people are referring to.

If you're just an average guy who isn't aggressively self improving though, you are on a rapid decline.

Express-Armadillo225 · 2023-08-01T05:25:25+00:00

The state that a man embodies will be what manifests in life

Unkl_Chng82 · 2023-08-15T18:34:53+00:00

I get that you want to refute rp points but I gotta keep it 100. There's truth to that old saying. They have another term called "Silver Foxes" for good looking older men. First off older men can pull young women because of their resources , stability, and experience. Look at celebrities like George Clooney, Edris Alba, Leonardo Dicaprio, heck even old rockstars like Mick Jagger dated younger women. This has been going on for a long time and it's not creepy at all. Also thus isn't exclusively a rp point as I've been told the same thing by my older female friends. Some guys don't get many ladies when they're young but when they matured and established themselves many women notice them.

OldMenAreGross · 2023-08-01T18:15:48+00:00

BuildingBigfoot · 2023-08-01T00:08:38+00:00

Everyone does really if you take care of yourself. Don’t drink. Don’t smoke. Eat right. Exercise. Don’t purposely tan. Skin care.

You’ll age better.

I’m 50 and often I’m mistaken for late 30/ early 40s.

ResistPrestigious373 · 2023-08-03T05:28:18+00:00

As a woman in her 30s, I'm still grossed out by a man 10+ years older hitting on me. I have rarely met a man over 40 that I was attracted to. Recently was approached by a man a decade older and when I asked him what he could give me that a man my own age couldn't, he replied "maturity" ....but after a small chat I could tell that was a bunch of bs.... so no, men do not age like fine wine... it's all cope.

AcrobaticRhubarb2147 · 2023-07-31T23:46:29+00:00

100 percent correct

Revolutionary_Law793 · 2023-08-01T17:29:25+00:00

I have 50 year old bf, he is 15 years older. He is the epitome of non toxic masculinity. No midlife crisis, no bullshit. At his forties he was a womaniser & alcoholic. So yeah, he got better with age.

da_trealest · 2023-08-01T20:30:48+00:00

It is completely okay to date younger women. In this day and age people are finally allowed to see whoever they want. Let people enjoy things.

thefirstjustin · 2023-08-01T21:17:39+00:00

I’ve observed from couples I know 25 is usually when the lines of an age gap tend to blur and not be as much of a deal, and the closer a woman is to 30, it’s not at all uncommon to see age gaps of ten years or more. It has less to do with money and other superficial things. It has more to do with a connection and emotional maturity. Where I live, the difference in the city and 30 minutes outside it are as different as night and day. The young women in the city don’t want a guy that much older than them, but I’ve had young women in a town 30 minutes way tell me they are looking for a man in his 30s or 40s since the guys their age aren’t ready to settle down and marry. So I think in order for a relationship to work out with a large age gap, a number of factors need to be in the correct place: connection, emotional maturity, location, and the goals of the people involved. If any of those are off, a disaster is waiting to happen.

NegativeKarmaVegan · 2023-08-01T22:24:57+00:00

I don't think the idea is that men age better than women, but that the things that are generally considered proxies of the value of a person in our society are less dependent on youth for men than it is for women.

Women are often valued romantically for their looks and youth, while men are often valued for their status and success. Youth is given, while status and financial success may take a while to acquire for most men, so it's reasonable to argue that men and women reach their "peak" value at different stages in life.

The issue is that those are just proxies, just a couple of variables in a myriad of different things that can make someone be considered valuable or interesting as a romantic partner.

sweetbrown89 · 2023-08-01T22:53:12+00:00

Your entire premise is disingenuous

You’re specifying “a fat out of shape” man

A hot in shape older man is going to have advantages over a hot in shape younger man…primarily money and career

A “fat out of shape” younger man will probably not have more advantages than a “fat out of shape” older man

buzluu · 2023-08-01T09:32:59+00:00

Who knows,really

ashaw7 · 2023-08-03T14:50:23+00:00

Noone who becomes "fat and out of shape" gets better. And these men who get better do so mostly in the eyes of women in the same age bracket. There are probably some cases where younger women crush on them, amd yes these men sometimes wind up in a relationship with younger women, at least more often than happens with older women and young men.

Primary_Objective_24 · 2023-08-03T17:20:37+00:00

So, iirc men tend to keep a more younger appearance basically because most women have thinner skin and lose more collagen which basically is the elasticity in the skin. That being said, men lose significant amount of testosterone in their 50-60s whereas women lose significant amounts of estrogen 40s-50s.

Here’s my take. Skin care has gotten so much better along with general information on health/foods,etc. Along with the fact women are less stressed out compared to years ago, I don’t see why women wouldn’t start aging much better than before. This whole “women peak at 25” is just undertones of a pedophilic mindset along with the desperate desire for control.

Title	Do men really get better with age? Aren't you more likely trying to dodge the creepy label than be a stud with younger women?
Author	spankyourkopita
Upvotes	57
Comments	62
Date	July 31, 2023 10:17 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/15etww1/do_men_really_get_better_with_age_arent_you_more/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/do-men-really-get-better-with-age-arent-you-more.1227040 https://theredarchive.com/post/1227040

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