Always look into a man’s background before meeting them like this (it’s free):

Unlikely-Marzipan · 2020-10-20T05:37:17+00:00

[permanently deleted]

CassieGreen85 · 2020-10-20T04:07:04+00:00

Damn, if I could I'd give you gold. We should sticky this resources so they're a permanent set of tools for FDSers.

AyemHerself · 2020-10-20T04:29:08+00:00

While it does provide a scary amount of information, it's not perfect. I just entered my own phone number into fastpeoplesearch and some details were way off, like the lists of relatives and associates full of people I've never met. So be sure to check everything you find, court records are a good place to do that.

Wise-Jelly · 2020-10-20T05:32:11+00:00

Excellent!! This is a serious topic but I would also like to add a humorous anecdote. Before I go out with a guy I search for his name, address, social media, background, etc. but now I'm considering googling his close family as well.

My date last weekend told me his family was involved with white collar crime in the Mafia. (lmao the mafia does not have a large presence in my city, giveaway #1) His family actually went bankrupt after someone stole an inheritance. Besides the fact that he is a total psycho, after vetting his family I realized the "truth" which is still pretty bad, but not as bad as the fact that he invented a lie to sound like James Bond or AJ Soprano.

vitryolic · 2020-10-20T05:46:10+00:00

Great advice! Wish there was an equivalent for this in the U.K. Does anyone know of one?

Pahapan · 2020-10-20T07:20:30+00:00

I searched my ex and for some reason the only criminal record result is from 10 years ago when he assaulted someone at 17. This happened in another state so maybe that's why? He's definitely been convicted of other crimes since then as an adult. Did two stints in Rikers.

This is a really great, helpful resource but keep your guard up, ladies. Don't assume that just because you can't find a criminal record that he's not a criminal.

neighson · 2020-10-20T10:23:07+00:00

Just a note on your first method, fast people search is basically a phone data scraper. Lots of variables can make it very inaccurate, for example if someone moves often, share a phone plan with family, uses parents address for mail etc. (I personally send everything to my parents house for this reason)

The second method works, depending on your county you may get more or less information. But you can just type in "x county case search" on google. You can find tickets, criminal records, lawsuits, large collections, etc. This way

Sauce: I do some PI work

lskfjd743 · 2020-10-20T15:57:04+00:00

I agree with everyone who previously said that these free/low cost background investigation sources should be listed on FDS.

Companies do background checks on you before they offer you employment There is no reason in the world why a woman should not do a background investigation on a man who she is going to offer her time and company.

My only caveat, is that you should never tell your date, or for the matter any man (we should treat this process as 'fight club confidential') that you do a background check on a date. Even if they have nothing to hide they will become twitchy and accuse you of being paranoid/having trust issues ect. If you find something that concerns you, just cancel the date, block, and delete. Do not confront the guy about his pending divorce or rape conviction, he will just try to gaslight you.

redfarmmmmm · 2020-10-20T12:43:06+00:00

I always look him up on instagram, type his following and friends on ig and locations he was tagged at.

I look up his linkedin but the best thing that worked?

Once you start dating, you meet his family and close friends. If they’re neurotic and narcs almost 100% he is also like that.

Also his grammar, his vocab, how he takes his photos these little things will show his true personality. People will say anyone can fake these things, but it shows their traits in these routes.

Eva4ever28 · 2020-10-20T11:25:22+00:00

When I was dating, I straight up told guys I do thorough background checks of them before meeting them. I do not trust men. They always told me they don’t blame me haha. My girlfriends and I would also always tell each other when and where we were dating. We would share our location and text/call to check on one another during the date. Be safe!

ScallionOk958 · 2020-10-20T21:01:04+00:00

I am paying for a background check website for the next few months. If anyone would like me to send a report, PM me and I’ll look someone up for you

jayohday · 2020-10-20T12:33:38+00:00

You can also look into tools like Nexis and TLO though they’re pretty expensive. Sometimes you can access them at a local library.

straighthairgreece · 2020-10-20T15:24:49+00:00

Ohh I wish there was a Canadian version of that first site!

2020-10-20T06:18:12+00:00

THANK YOU! This is the kind of advice I come here for! You are a Goddess among women

AnniaT · 2020-10-20T10:40:51+00:00

Do these background checks work in Europe? I have a hard time doing background checks here due to the privacy laws.

2020-10-20T12:15:31+00:00

Is there any equivalent for Canada?

jayohday · 2020-10-20T12:40:51+00:00

Also dump if he gets mad that you backgrounded him. My last LVMX did and yeah the whole thing was a disaster

riotous486saturn · 2020-10-20T08:21:08+00:00

Hmm. I looked myself up on fastpeoplesearch and my address is wrong. So I looked up my aunt and it says she’s not married, but she has been for 12 years. So. Not very accurate. But like... still got some stuff right.

Half_Halt · 2020-10-20T14:15:24+00:00

A lot of states now have a statewide digital database for civil & criminal court cases. My state was way late to the party on this but finally went live with it this summer. One tip: find out their birth year & run a few searches entering as little info as will still return results. Search on several possible spellings; with middle initial & without; etc.

People here are forever hiring horse farm help without any sort of background check & someone posted on our community board warning about one such person after a scary altercation occurred after she fired them. I posted the link for the state court database. Out of curiosity, I searched the individuals involved. Boom. Records a mile long. And several variations of name; mostly same first name & slightly altered middle name. The birth year & month (and in this case, general vicinty of the incidents) are how you could tell it's the same person. Things like traffic offenses come up, too. It's a personal bias, but I think a sh-t ton of vehicular violations is sketchy. Once in a while? Sure, we all make mistakes. But if you've got 10 toll violations on the same road? Sketchy af. It's not that hard to refrain from toll jumping, make sure your registration is utd, not drive 20 mph over the posted speed limit in a residential area.

Again, not a failsafe. Certain counties don't have everything uploaded, cases that occurred prior to a certain date are not available, and some cases are withheld from public information. But it's a good one to have in the tool kit.

-sIm0n3 · 2020-10-20T16:14:41+00:00

This is so important & has saved me a few times in the past. I’m also currently dealing with a guy who won’t stop harassing me. We began chatting in 2016 from tinder to Snapchat, but we never met. He started messaging me randomly in September 2020 and reappeared in my city a few days ago. I have no idea why he’s chosen to blow me up or how he even remembers me. I blocked him on Snapchat in early October because he was way too aggressive. Somehow he found me on Instagram this weekend and started begging me to link up with him in a very off-putting way. What he doesn’t know is that I’m aware of his violent past thanks to a group of women who were all attacked by him. He gives himself away though when he talks about how much he hates being back in this city. I’m like I wonder if it has anything to do with your assault charges 🙄.

frogirl1993 · 2020-10-20T16:36:43+00:00

I used fastpeoplessearch and found out the guy I was talking to was married. I did a deep dive and found his real Facebook needless to say she got a message full of screenshots.

2020-10-20T21:33:23+00:00

And this is why I will not give my number and provide a fake last name. Scary to have this done to you and be stalked.

Alpha_Aries · 2020-10-20T09:35:43+00:00

this is going to sound very naive of me, so, sorry... why not give a man your real number? i just block people and haven't had problems. is there something i'm missing?

Sweetlikecream · 2020-10-20T17:19:33+00:00

Hmm I get why getting a man's number / contact at first but usually it's because they are lazy and want the women to chase or they have a girlfriend. I'm against texting or calling a man first...

Partypuppers · 2020-10-20T10:27:59+00:00

Thanks for this post! Does anyone in the UK know the best way to perform a background check?

I_am_so_lost_again · 2020-10-20T11:29:27+00:00

This is vital! I was setting up a date to meet a guy and got enough information to look him up in the sex offender registry. He was a level 3 with a child under the age of 13.

Google is your best friend. Its not difficult if you know their first/last name, at least how old they are, and the city they live in to start your search. I like voter registry pages. So much information just there as to what you may be dealing with.

killerjewels · 2020-10-20T13:00:40+00:00

Would anyone know the UK equivalent to all three points? Thanks in advance

LittleBiitchyBanana · 2020-10-20T13:37:10+00:00

Being safe is the most basic rule every lady should follow. This post is a life saver 🙌

queendorkus · 2020-10-20T13:37:49+00:00

This seems like a great service to offer women. Casual background check with a relationship horoscope on the side to boot!

amayfrost · 2020-10-20T17:18:52+00:00

Thank you for post.

Has anyone tried to remove their own information from this site? It lists my address and apartment number which is scary.

AyemHerself · 2020-10-21T07:42:33+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Always look into a man’s background before meeting them like this (it’s free):
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	588
Comments	55
Date	October 20, 2020 3:20 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jehi20/always_look_into_a_mans_background_before_meeting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/always-look-into-a-mans-background-before-meeting.1194204 https://theredarchive.com/post/1194204

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