Being Traditional is impossible for men and expecting of them is flat out gaslighting.

half3mptyhalffull · 2024-07-02T16:33:21+00:00

But..... Dating is not traditional. Dating in itself literally broke the traditions.

i agree

however-

a man being "traditional" in a dating relationship and a man being "traditional" in a ltr/marriage are 2 very different things.

i would also like to know who these women are- most of the women ive known want to split things 50/50 because of their beliefs related to feminism and equality. they dont want to be "forced" to be "traditional" women who stay at home to cook, clean, and have babies.

are these women youre refering to wanting to be sahms? homemakers? "traditional" women? because someone who wants to be a sahm/homemaker is not going to want to be trying to make that happen on top of financially providing for her family.

Creation_Soul · 2024-07-02T13:30:34+00:00

i don't see this pressure for men to pay everything in a relationship long term. Most couples I know are dual income either by choice (it good to have more money) or by necessity (it's impossible to live with only one income).

your example with "women expecting men to still bring 1000 coins" is not something i really see. While women still expect their partners income to be similar or slightly higher, in real life I don't see this pressure for the man to bring in a way higher income that that of the women.

Electrical_Novel1156 · 2024-07-02T15:56:42+00:00

Most people are dual income. Expecting to pay for dates is fine if that's what you want to do. Hell most of the time if a woman wants to 50/50 or pay for a date it's usually an indicator to me that she's not that interested because unless the woman is an idiot they KNOW that a man taking you out on a nice date with good sexual chemistry will lead to more (Might not be sex, but some level of intimacy). Yeah you get gold digger but honestly they're pretty easy to sus out.

Good women DO NOT CARE if you can't pay for fancy dinners every week. Take her for a smoothie or a walk in the park or something. If they get mad good job sir you have dodged a bullet. Ditch the gold digger and move on.

There's no pressure for men to pay for everything like rent and other expenses just dates, and honestly most men generally insist on paying for dates as is it's just how we work.

leosandlattes · 2024-07-02T12:56:58+00:00

Which women are expecting their husbands to be completely traditional when most couples are dual income out of necessity? Like… the average American woman knows she will not be provided for, nor do they even want to be provided for. I don’t know what kind of Only Fans girls or e-prostitutes you’re following, but the vast majority of women do not expect you to pay her rent or other bills after a few dates lol.

tendrils87 · 2024-07-02T18:35:32+00:00

I have what most would consider to be a traditional marriage. The problem is that if you want that, you have to have the knowledge and skill to BE a “traditional” man, as well as be able to do the things that women traditionally did. If you want a woman that will cook and clean for you, you as a man need to cook and clean for yourself. She has to want to do it out of her own desire to please you, not because you are a man-child that NEEDS it.

Professional_Chair28 · 2024-07-02T21:49:37+00:00

Progressive people want progressive people.

Traditional people want traditional people.

Not all women are progressive. Not all men are traditional.

literaryhogwartian · 2024-07-02T13:34:49+00:00

Courting has always happened, it was a traditional part of the romantic ritual.

obviousredflag · 2024-07-02T16:01:58+00:00

Somehow dating works. How do you explain this? Either women are not expecting men to be traditional, or they can be.

apresonly · 2024-07-02T17:25:22+00:00

then men need to stop saying they are traditional or providers or protectors.

Junior_Ad_3086 · 2024-07-02T22:12:38+00:00

except for a few delusional tiktokers who create clickbait content, almost no woman expects you to pay her rent after dating a few weeks. i would say that most women in the west don't expect that ever. a lot of women are fine with shared expenses in a relationship. sure some want to have their cake and eat it too but you don't have to entertain those women. there are also men who want traditional gfs and wives who still work and contribute financially, which is just as delusional.

dating is optional and you have a choice whether you want to pursue a progressive woman who demands traditional treatment. the reason it's somewhat common (to a degree) is that men entertain this non-sense. and i'm saying this as someone who pays for dates etc, i just don't date women who expect a bunch of one-sided privileges.

MistyMaisel · 2024-07-02T12:26:43+00:00

They just want you to open doors, buy flowers, pay for dates, and swing a hammer once in awhile, Tim. It's not that complicated.

toasterchild · 2024-07-02T16:45:14+00:00

Where do you see this besides online? Is this a rural religious people thing?

Ok-Dust-4156 · 2024-07-02T17:08:33+00:00

Then just don't be traditional.

AnonishCath · 2024-07-03T01:27:00+00:00

You don’t have to be a traditional man or a provider. There are plenty of women who are willing to act like a roommate to a man by splitting the bills and the chores, and then be lovers in the bedroom.

Of course a traditional man and a progressive woman isn’t going to be a good fit and visa versa. But it is in no way gaslighting or impossible for men to take on the role of provider and household leader. It works when two people have the same values.

I have a more traditional marriage. My husband pursued me, he paid for our dates, and after we vetted each other and had the important conversations, he proposed. He offered to pay my rent while we were engaged (I declined because I was still working), and once we married I quit my job and now I’m a SAHW. My husband works and pays all our bills, and I take care of the home, the chores, the cooking, our pets, and will care for any future children. Most of my friends are SAHW/M as well.

gollyned · 2024-07-03T04:35:28+00:00

It's stupid to expect men to be "traditional" in these ways while they're multi-dating. I do it anyway because I'm assertive and high-income and it works. Still a stupid expectation. And like most silly ideas, this one comes from instagram and tiktok. Most women in my demographic do little in their free time but use these apps.

SaBahRub · 2024-07-02T14:10:28+00:00

It is totally possible for a man to earn all the money and the woman to do all the cleaning and childcare

Pathosgrim · 2024-07-03T13:45:09+00:00

Women are just hypocritical and paradoxical. Post entering the workforce, technological advancements and earning more income they still expect men to be above their level. Intervention from the powers that be has risen Women and lowered men. Traditionalism is a falsehood yet Women still seek it while hypocritically call for an end to gender norms.

boom-wham-slam · 2024-07-03T23:35:22+00:00

Being traditional is already dead on arrival because women are not virgins... mic drop.

Artistic_Bumblebee17 · 2024-07-07T04:31:11+00:00

The point is- we don’t care. Create a net benifit for us or we won’t engage.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-07-02T16:51:19+00:00

Quality of life has been increasing. The pile of coins is getting bigger. As you can buy more items of value with the average wage, wages have been increasing in real terms. Even better, your partner is expected to go out earning too for extra help instead of having to fit earning income around chores that used to be a full-time job but we can now often get machines to do. They've been a massive contributor to quality of life increases as they've been freed up to produce more stuff and services for us all to enjoy. You're not even expected to pay for a whole household with more than one adult by yourself even with those higher wages. But yes, if you move in with someone, you will still usually be expected to pay part of the rent/mortgage.

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Title	Being Traditional is impossible for men and expecting of them is flat out gaslighting.
Author	Fancy_Technology_563
Upvotes	25
Comments	120
Date	July 2, 2024 2:58 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1dtbl3d/being_traditional_is_impossible_for_men_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/being-traditional-is-impossible-for-men-and.1523014 https://theredarchive.com/post/1523014

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