Why You Should Never Get Married

NathanHollister · 2019-05-24T00:12:04+00:00

Basically, if you want to get married, just skip all the bullshit and buy a house for someone you hate.

snoozeflu · 2019-05-24T06:20:46+00:00

There is ZERO benefit or incentive for a man to get married in current year. None. Marriage and family courts are tilted HEAVILY in a woman's favor.

Anything you can get from marriage you can also get without getting married.

You can be in love without getting married
you can have kids without getting married
you can live together without getting married

And on and on...

The reason women are so in favor of marriage is because when they get married, they are basically holding on to a winning lottery ticket that they can choose to cash in whenever they want.

trancedj · 2019-05-24T01:23:43+00:00

Yeah, I’ve been seeing posts lately about “oh a happy marriage is still a viable option for red pilled men”.

The fuck it is.

Here’s the best advice I can give young men who want marriage and kids. Build yourself up to the point where if you lost half your shit, were forced to pay alimony, and are cool seeing your kids half time then roll the fucking dice and hope it doesn’t come up snake eyes.

I’m serious. This means unless you’re at a point where you would be ok living on about half your income or less, then you’re a damned fool for playing the marriage game. Period. End of story. This means in the south you should be earning at least 150k year. If you’re on the west coast it could be double that or more.

This is the best case scenario for young men these days. But simps gonna simp and chads gonna chad.

WalterEArmstrong · 2019-05-24T05:01:05+00:00

"Protestant Denominations would allow it, but still, it didn’t happened. Why? Because married women actively belittled divorced women." WRONG! It was because there was no welfare state to fall back on and the courts didn't rape a guys bank account over it.

batfish55 · 2019-05-24T07:48:31+00:00

So what killed this great cultural construct? The cultural revolution that happened in the 60s and 70s. What aspect of it? That I’m not entirely certain of.

No-Fault Divorce happened. Prior to that, if HE fucked around on her, and she could prove it, she could leave and be justified in alimony. If SHE fucked around on him, and he could prove it, he could divorce her, and she'd be on the streets.

After No-Fault Divorce, you don't need evidence of any impropriety. 'Irreconcilable differences' was enough, and the man had to 'keep her in the lifestyle she'd been accustomed to.' Why would a woman have to keep up her end of the deal? She can stay for the wedding, have everyone look at her, she can live through the honeymoon, and the move-in honeymoon period, and then when it gets stale, she can leave, take the kids, and get cash and prizes.

MentORPHEUS · 2019-05-24T15:56:11+00:00

So what killed this great cultural construct?

Record scratch right here. People on TRP looove to idealize the 1950s as a golden era of idyllic relationships and happy marriages. The reality was, it not only sucked for most average men AND women, but it was extremely difficult to exert one's individual will to FIX one's situation.

1950s society rigidly enforced marriage, however it not only offered no guarantee of a GOOD marriage, it guaranteed many marriages would become a prison of mutual misery.

The free love hippie movement is often blamed on conspiracies and manipulators from without, but it was by and large chosen by the individuals who grew up within miserable households watching their Fathers trapped in rigid work hierarchies and their Mothers drinking and pill popping their misery away. The events of the 1960s amounted to a collective, "Fuck that!"

throwlaca · 2019-05-24T04:34:49+00:00

Here in Latin America we had a 'workers revolution' 50 years ago, so oppressed workers got all kinds of laws defending them. Benefits, rights, vacations, paid leaves, protection from firings, retirement plans, health plans, lawsuits against employers are guaranteed to be won by employees. etc.

So it was all good right? yes, paradise. In theory.

In reality, hiring a person is so dangerous, so costly, that things went two ways:

2) Illegal hiring: employees are not registered legal workers so have has no rights. This is obviously illegal but much cheaper and salaries are often higher.

2) Incredibly low pay: Legal hiring is rare because they are very expensive. Not only taxes but all the benefits the employer has to offer, not counting lawsuits in which the employer always loses a huge amount of money. So the only way for business to hire people is to pay them shit, so when the inevitable lawsuit came, it will break even.

So, this is exactly what happened to marriages. Women have so many rights, so many advantages against men, that getting married is a total net loss for the men.

BTW, hiring a women is ALSO a net loss for the employees as they have even more rights. Consequence: Employers are being forced to hire women.

Likewise, women got so many rights against men that marriage is going extinct. So, how long until marriage is forced on men? maybe it already happened, just is not called marriage. There are laws that if you live together with a girl for some time, she has the same rights as a married women. In the future this time will be decreased from some years to some weeks, or maybe just the word of the women is required. This is when children will stop getting born, at least in the stupid western civilizations that enforce these stupid laws.

RevolutionaryPea7 · 2019-05-24T09:28:06+00:00

Good post. We've got rid of a lot of "shaming" in recent decades. We don't shame gluttony: we got fatties. We don't shame laziness: we've forgotten how to cook and clean for ourselves. We don't shame hypergamy: we got sluts.

But it turns out a lot of that shaming was actually valid because, guess what, there are many things you can do for which you should be ashamed. I'm not a religious person by any means, but I totally understand what they were going for by having these social codes. We need them. We will fail as a species without them.

GrandYam_HomeRun · 2019-05-24T02:11:06+00:00

So there was a post earlier today about how marriage is back on the menu boys! And Christ on a Cracker did all the blue pill dreamers start coming out of the woodwork. FYI, the guy who wrote that was 57, his wife was from a different generation and she probably wouldn't know hypergamy if it bit her in the ass.

Just because you want something to be, does not necessarily make it so. You can be the perfect little red pill boy scout with your frame and dread and whatever else and it doesn't mean squat in a family court. Do you idiots understand that? She holds all the cards, you are at her mercy, your options are slim.

It's depressing how many people don't read the sidebar.

MattyAnon · 2019-05-24T12:50:37+00:00

So what killed this great cultural construct? The cultural revolution that happened in the 60s and 70s. What aspect of it? That I’m not entirely certain of

What happened was a combination of factors. Women in the most claimed-abusive marriages demanded freedom and got it. Then women who weren't happppppppy demanded freedom and got it. It gradually became acceptable and indeed common for women to divorce.

The laws changed to enable this, including no-fault divorce or very close analogs to same.

Meanwhile the financial penalties on men were left in place as they had been for centuries: support your ex wife because she can't support herself. Even though she can now very happily support herself. Women complained about abuse, lost working years, loss of career, not being allowed to work..... in fact anything that would imply they are owed money and generally did great in divorce court (at male expense). The claim "she's not done an ounce of work in 20 years, it's her who owes me money" was of course ignored.

But marriage is dead

Sadly it's not dead, but hopefully it soon will be. Most men still believe it confers some sort of advantage on them, and many more will marry out of some crazy misplaced loyalty. Or weakness. I never quite get it.

Men who actively give another party an incentive to destroy their lives should not be taken seriously

Yeah, and this exactly it. Today's marriage is incentivizing her to leave. Can someone explain to me why this concept is so hard to grasp?

Graciey48 · 2019-05-24T11:37:30+00:00

Black spilled did a fantastic video on how divorce became de-stigmatised in the 70s through Hollywood movies

other_worlds · 2019-05-24T08:09:23+00:00

So what killed this great cultural construct?

Two things together, the rise of feminism and the increase of the welfare system. Both began a massive expansion starting in the 60s. One needs the other to survive.

ring2ding · 2019-05-24T01:49:00+00:00

Massively oversimplified an extremely complicated landscape by rehashing the same old nonsense that was trash the first day it was written and contributed absolutely nothing novel or of any value to the discussion. Well done.

beginner_ · 2019-05-24T04:52:25+00:00

All true but also leaving out the fact that marriage is a life-long contract which details can change anytime (the law) and you have no option to then opt-out. Who knows what the law makers will come up with in the next 50 years? No one. Marriage was a bad idea as soon as the state got involved.

And to switch topic, law changes are what makes donating sperm a dumb idea. In 20 years they might make you pay for all your kids born from donated sperm.

bigmacked4 · 2019-05-24T15:31:17+00:00

I sincerely enjoy this sr for posts and opinions exactly like this. This sr is the counterargument to every PC, conflict-avoidant way of life I (and I presume others) have been taught to live by.

Sometimes however, I think it pushes the extremes (reddit admins seem to think that's all this community does lol). I would argue the idea that getting married is equivalent to asking to be shot in the leg is a bit much.

What about marriages that do not end in divorce? The ones where a truly profound emotional connection is established. The ones where each partner contributes in a constructive way emotionally and financially. Where the two of you ARE each other's best friends?

What am I to make of that argument?

I may just be young (19) and hopeful but to me, this idea I've outlined holds some strange merit.

Can someone give me some more insight into this way of thinking? Is it overly naive?

LandoChronus · 2019-05-24T16:53:38+00:00

Getting married is like betting oon your favorite sports team to win a game.

If you lose, you give up half your stuff forever. If you win, your situation doesn't actually change. You don't get any money, and your bookie doesnt hook you up with exciting payouts on bets you don't place.

It's a lose-nothing deal.

Govedo13 · 2019-05-25T06:14:42+00:00

Birth control killed it. But not the known old type physical birth control but the pills: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Combined_oral_contraceptive_pill

For the first time the women had control over the outcome from sex without male participation in the process. Here are also some interesting facts:

https://www.ourbodiesourselves.org/book-excerpts/health-article/a-brief-history-of-birth-control/

Like: "1916 Margaret Sanger opens first birth control clinic in the United States. The next year she was deemed guilty of maintaining a public nuisance and sentenced to jail for 30 days. Once released, she re-opened her clinic and continued to persevere through more arrests and prosecutions."

and this: "1965 The Supreme Court (in Griswold v. Connecticut) gave married couples the right to use birth control, ruling that it was protected in the Constitution as a right to privacy. However, millions of unmarried women in 26 states were still denied birth control."

There were some serious resistance against the birth control. Only whores in whorehouses used it.

You know what happens when one gives women a power and keep them unchecked. First I thought it was only the employment but then I found this study: https://halshs.archives-ouvertes.fr/halshs-01297653/document The employment abilities are the one side of the coin, the birth control is the other side.

Without birth control, employment options/economic power and without parent testing methodology males have full control over sex and its outcome. If you remove this 3 safety checks, one should be crazy to expect more from women

AtlasHJack69 · 2019-05-24T04:45:02+00:00

I do wanna get married but not through the govt but through the church. According to the state we wouldn't be recognized so our assets would never be joined. but in the eyes of God we will. To be fair though the divorce rate is somewhat exaggerated. It's heavily concentrated in few places, big cities mostly.

I've been looking at divorce rates across the country. They are low in mid sized cities. with some exceptions in the Midwest. Low in New England. Christianity had it right.

ImTooCozy · 2019-05-24T02:09:05+00:00

The most important thing in the world is family. Those without it are limited by how far they go. Look at the old men out there without families and it's not hard to see most have an emptiness inside.

The key is how to pick the right woman. If you pick a woman that comes from a broken family and doesn't know how to take care of herself, then yes...You're going to get fucked over.

I have a woman that makes more money than me, cooks every meal, is organized, takes care of her health, and overall takes great care of me. She was not born in America and sees right through feminism.

Since she's come into my life I've literally 3x'd my income with her support. I know with her support I'm going to be a multi millionaire. We're building an empire that we can pass on to our grandchildren.

Am I going to marry her? Hell yes.

RK4765 · 2019-05-24T02:00:19+00:00

This post is so melodramatic. You 23 year olds will get it when you're 33. Marry the right woman who is religious, doesn't use Instagram and has a strong father.

Dig121 · 2019-05-24T01:42:05+00:00

Isn’t Rollo Tomassi, one of the literal godfather of TRP and writer of ‘The Rational Male’ happily married with a daughter?

captain_COONdog · 2019-05-24T08:27:22+00:00

The cultural revolution came about at the time of the Vietnam War - in other words, daddy was gone and either died in combat or came back with a frame neutered by PTSD. Que generationally passed down abandonment issues and hypergamy. America doomed itself fighting that war, but only because they lost. (Might is right.) The culture then further spread to Europe, etc etc. Welcome to hell, boys.

stoicbotanist · 2019-05-24T08:45:11+00:00

I totally agree with everything in this post, but I think the counter argument should be mentioned. I feel like this is only a small part of the equation. This is very simple for most of us... That's why you should explain why men get married, and what does it feel like to want to get married and why are those feelings sometimes more powerful than reason? Also, women want to get married, but they don't want to be married. In other words, they want a marriage, a honeymoon, and a honeymoon-hubby-wife phase, but not a husband. They don't want to be married

DrinkBeerWinPrizes · 2019-05-24T11:43:32+00:00

Marriage is out dated. If you really “love” someone you dont need a piece of paper to tell you so.

Aggressive_Beta · 2019-05-24T12:23:56+00:00

Newsflash: you don’t need to be married in order for them to take the kids. Big daddy government will back her 9 times out of 10 if she wants to do that.

Yummmi · 2019-05-24T12:34:15+00:00

Just curious, Do prenups no longer work?

escapethesolarsystem · 2019-05-24T13:34:54+00:00

Very true, the divorce issue is a social one. In countries were women who divorce are still considered "sluts" and looked down on by society, divorce is initiated mainly by men, not women.

1v1crown · 2019-05-24T14:49:40+00:00

Basically, social ostracism was a good thing. Now that it's "diversity is our strength" people are out of control.

Soon_As_I_Nut · 2019-05-24T04:12:38+00:00

Just give her your bank card and pin.

ChadowyFigure · 2019-05-24T12:17:59+00:00

I am happily married, and I was just over in that other pro-marriage post (since deleted) defending the idea that a man can stay happy and maintain control in a marriage.

But I married before I took the pill, and I would never do it again, nor would I ever advise any other man to do it. There is simply no upside.

360_no_scope_upvote · 2019-05-24T04:08:40+00:00

Shuttering at these blue pill af comments, you dreamers need to go back to relationship advice

IQtheMC · 2019-05-24T12:56:06+00:00

My dad grew up in the 60s. He blames the self esteem movement

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mysteryspoN · 2019-05-24T07:17:27+00:00

Feel like divorce is more mainstream in USA. In UK it’s not as mainstream - still happens but seems like USA has more cases proportionally. I think it’s the men tbh. USA men seem to be so weak and more inclined to feminism.. that’s my opinion at least

geo_gan · 2019-05-24T08:06:59+00:00

Is child support still only up to 18 in your country? Because it mine, by family court judgement during a normal split, even if you are not married, the child support goes up to the child’s “last years of education”. Which means you can add at least another 5 years of child support payments after 18 years of age...

Cods_gift_to_reddit · 2019-05-24T11:11:12+00:00

You can tell women that you don't believe in marriage and that you will never get married, but that you are all for a celebration of love. That way they get a party with all their friends and they get to say 'vows' while you're protected legally and not locked down forever tied to this one lady.

If a woman turns down a celebration of love ceremony, but desperately wants to get married then it says a lot about her unconscious/conscious desires. What's the difference? Why does she want the marriage but not a personalized celebration of love?

Unnormally2 · 2019-05-24T11:28:34+00:00

I don't disagree, but aren't there other legal advantages to marriage? Filing taxes as a couple, getting joint insurance rates, to name a few.

SeamusAwl · 2019-05-24T14:50:42+00:00

There are benefits to being married. It is just that due to the cultural shift, the cons vastly out weigh pros of marriage. And from what I see out there, gettin i to an LTR with a girl is getting just as bad.

Numero34 · 2019-05-24T15:38:56+00:00

Re: what

See here

https://youtu.be/HwbzF9tKSd8

thewrecker8 · 2019-05-24T16:06:38+00:00

Marriage: Betting half your shit a person will be with you until death.

SKRedPill · 2019-05-24T16:07:39+00:00

Women are herd animals. Their whole frame is like that.

opper-hombre1 · 2019-05-24T16:15:24+00:00

For every one post about marriage, there is 10 posts not to get married

Yashugan00 · 2019-05-24T16:21:14+00:00

information density creates singularities. Women were becoming interconnected throughout all strata of life and were able to encourage the power of consensus. the hive mind of women

thewrecker8 · 2019-05-24T16:26:26+00:00

So what killed this great cultural construct? The cultural revolution that happened in the 60s and 70s. What aspect of it? That I’m not entirely certain of.

What played a big role in this is what's destroying society still today....Feminism. The womens lib movement mostly started the downward spiral. Women wanted to be "liberated". They wanted to be in the workplace along with men. They wanted to earn their own money to not be reliant on their husbands. (Although the courts declared the man is still responsible for her way of life after a divorce). This has been going on and still going on today i.e. the "wage gap" between men and women. And in time divorce became less and less taboo. It started showing up in TV shows (opposed to a time when husband and wife weren't even allowed to be seen in a bed together on TV.....The Flintstones were the first to ever show it).

But the feminist movement has been and continues to be (imo) one of the biggest killers of monogamous relationships. "Why should men be praised for sleeping with a lot of women but women are sluts for doing it?" Women used to be frowned upon for sleeping around, today girls are touting "hoe life" as a badge of honor. But now women are wanting that old lifestyle back. They want to get married and be a stay home mom but complain they can't find a good man post wall. The easiest way to ruin anything involving women is to give them what they say they want.

They wanted independence, they got it. Now many don't want it and long for the days when her biggest worries were taking care of the kids before and after school, and having dinner made when her husband gets home.

[deleted] · 2019-05-24T17:16:50+00:00

Never would be anle to do it - TradCon values propped up by church and state are meaningless to me. A long term partner? Yeah, maybe if she agrees with no shared expenses (aka the potential for personal debt); so that's doubtful. I wouldn't disrespect myself by being married.

Flintblood · 2019-05-24T17:29:07+00:00

I like the feeling of meeting someone new who clicks with me and is pleasing to my eye. However, since discovering abundance and rp testimonials I only go so far as to imagine great company with them while it lasts and no more.

adminsaregayniggers · 2019-05-25T01:16:40+00:00

The only advice my dad has ever given me on dating/women is to never get married

Babyoil707 · 2019-05-25T17:29:58+00:00

Is it fare to say you can give her the ceremony, the honeymoon, the whole shibang, but never sign any papers?

Way2ManyTakenNames · 2019-05-29T04:15:05+00:00

marriage is literally legal robbery lol

ducklord · 2019-05-24T07:33:14+00:00

You are absolutely right.

I shouldn't have married my wife.

I shouldn't have spent the past over-20-years with her.

She shouldn't be my best friend, my comrade, the only person on the world that constantly supports me AND acts as a voice of reason when I do crap. Because I do. Before we got together, I didn't have a dime aside. I spent everything on pure crap, day-in, day-out.

We shouldn't be together.

For there's a CHANCE that tomorrow, or in weeks, months, years, we'll end up getting a divorce.

So, fuck a good life with somebody else, fuck always having someone to talk to, fuck all this. 'Cause it COULD fail. Sometime in the future.

Right?

To extend this moronic, yes, moronic POV of life, never have friends: they might give up on you some time in the future. Don't buy a car, a TV or anything else for that matter. For, sometime in the future, it could break. And while on the matter, why-the-fuck keep on living since we'll inevitably die one day? Buy a gun and quit while you're ahead of the game!

That'll show'em!

Mathew_F · 2019-05-24T08:17:36+00:00

If you really must get married, get a prenup.

AliYaHaydarYaHussein · 2019-05-24T09:46:58+00:00

Yes, yes, don't get married goyim.

tenpointmatt · 2019-05-24T07:52:23+00:00

Guys - it's called a prenuptial agreement. You can still have a healthy marriage, kids, and all the happiness that it brings. All you have to do is dictate the financial terms of separation instead of letting the state do it. This shit is not that complicated.

MoreOfRitnau · 2019-05-24T00:14:23+00:00

Christ. Nothing new under the sun. Fuck this re-tread and tell us something we don’t know. Guess what dude? Numbers 1 through 7 beat you to it.

jenovajunkie · 2019-05-24T04:53:18+00:00

I'm glad you are receiving backlash.

cafeitalia · 2019-05-24T11:31:43+00:00

The divorce rate for first time marriages is about 50%. If you think you will be part of that 50% after you get married you do have a lot more things to work on and nowhere near the man that you could have become.

If you are complaining about the society as it is today and you are doing nothing to change it then you are a real coward. Cowards complain scream but never take action to change it as a whole. You state society is going to shitter and when they ask what you are gonna do about it and your answer is "I am gonna lift, build smv and fuck all these bitches" then you are doing nothing about it. Either start bringing new generation into this world and breed them to be great people or volunteer the fuck out of yourself for the youngsters and teach them lead them for the future.

Don't be a coward, walk the walk.

Title	Why You Should Never Get Married
Author	RamessesVII
Upvotes	258
Comments	276
Date	May 24, 2019 12:00 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/bsa48u/why_you_should_never_get_married/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/why-you-should-never-get-married.239623 https://theredarchive.com/post/239623

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