if young men in US are having sex 3x less than they were a decade ago but female rate has stayed the same, how are we supposed to believe there’s any hope for us??

SortaKindaWoulda · 2022-01-03T00:06:37+00:00

I get where you're coming from and that you're feeling hopeless. It's been over 2 years since I hooked up. But over the last year, I worked on NMMNG, building brotherhood, and getting out. Yesterday, I worked up the courage to kiss a girl in 2 years.

I'm an average looking dude and yet, sometimes when I out myself I see that some women seem interested in me. The thing is, they were interested before, I just hadn't noticed them and given them a chance. Maybe it'll take another while before I have sex again, but I'm happy to take baby steps.

May you take little steps each day and move toward your highest aim

ProdiLemaj · 2022-01-03T03:37:34+00:00

The dating market is rough out here for average men, but it is what it is. All you can do is try to get your money up, hit the gym, dress nice, and most importantly, actually put yourself out there and approach women. All this looking at statistics and feeling sorry for yourself is pointless. Average guys pull girls too, I see it all the time.

PaleontologistNo2785 · 2022-01-03T00:42:57+00:00

If youre average looking just approach a lot. Problem solved.

WillyM35 · 2022-01-03T01:24:10+00:00

Think about it this way. You also have like a trillion percent more access, and you also have WAY less competition.

Go out, have fun, be confident, smash pussy, you fucking king.

File-Complex · 2022-01-03T02:23:06+00:00

Start injecting testosterone and become a chad

ZombieFiesta · 2022-01-03T04:40:53+00:00

Without looking into this data more and where it comes from . IMO it comes down to women will always be the pickers and choosers. What I mean by that is woman have to constantly screen men to weed out the ones that are only there to objectify and exploit them sexually or even worse the ones that will assault or murder them upon rejection. Women are always going to have sex available to them because they will always have a plethora of suitors to choose from (good ones, bad ones, and down right terrible ones). Unfortunately most men do not experience this. I would bet most “Chads” (as this sub refers to) still have less options then even an average looking woman. The main reason the “Chad’s” get the action is because they take their shot. They get rejected too though. They don’t just show up and every woman throws themselves at them in some hypnotic trance.

I will let you all in on a little secret though. THE BAR IS SOOOOO LOW right now guys you have no idea. I promise if you do these few things that you will have success eventually:

Show interest (I like you, I have a crush on you, I want to take you out sometime)
Get vulnerable/share your feelings (I’m not great at dating/saying the right things always so apologies if I’m a little awkward at times, I get nervous around pretty girls)
a)Communicate effectively (Whats the best way and time to get a hold of you/these are the days I’m available/ this is what I want to do, are you interested in that)

3b. Show an interest in her life, really get to know her and listen/remember for god sakes!! Too many guys talk about themselves too much to try to overly impress due to being insecure, They totally forget to find out what she’s about. Trust me if she’s interested in you, you will have your chance to talk about yourself, she WILL ask!

Follow through on commitments/promises (don’t be late/stick to date agreements/if you fuck up own it and try not to continue that behavior)
Ask for consent and if she gives it keep moving it forward and ask for more consent later (can I hug you, can I kiss you, I want to have sex with you, do you want to have sex with me?) typically this will be progressed over X number of dates but all steps can also take place in a single evening with the right connection.

The “Chads” get the girl because the girl primarily gets approached by the chads and then ends up picking the least chady of the chads. Promise, most girls are not looking for a self involved, toxically masculine, cocky, disrespectful man child that’s going to fuck her then never talk to her again. And if she is, you probably don’t want to be with that girl anyway.

You’re going to get rejected it’s inevitable, it just means that person wasn’t the one. I understand not wanting to be “the creepy guy” but I feel like this fear has gotten irrationally extreme since the “me too” movement but you’re not going to get sued or arrested for simply asking a girl out. So this is not a valid excuse to not approach women. Just don’t be a perv and keep your hands to yourself. If she says “no” take it on the chin throw a “have a good day” at her and move on. I’d rather try and fail then not try at all and wonder what could have been.

If you’re super terrified about cold approaching then join a social group that will have the opposite gender there and frequent it (volleyball, hiking, yoga, gym class, dancing class). You’ll have to play the long game but eventually you’ll start seeing familiar faces and then it’s not a cold approach anymore.

And remember gentleman. Believe in yourself and know your value. Why should she be interested in you? What do you bring to the table? What are your intentions? What makes you a good guy and why? If you can’t answer these question for yourself then you need to work on yourself more and identify your own value before you even think about trying to bring a woman into your life. This is a completely different topic that we’ll save for another day but no woman is gonna see value in you if you don’t even see it in yourself. Woman want a partner not a child they need to instill confidence in.

LookingForCumpany · 2022-01-03T04:53:35+00:00

It's overrated anyway, man. Don't put too much value on it. I know it's depressing but thinking about what you don't have is depressing. Do cool shit that you couldn't do otherwise. That makes up for it for me. Like working on a hobby you like that would otherwise be time consumed by the significant other. That way it's more like a trade than a loss.

burncushlikewood · 2022-01-03T04:41:05+00:00

Yea I agree women have it easy when it comes to dating. This is why the manosphere was invented, to empower men in tough times. I suggest doing some reading and infield approaches, that's what we as men have is the ability to see a woman and immediately approach her, it's not that women don't approach men, it just doesn't happen as often. Get off of tinder and approach some real women, when you have game it will create an abundance of females in your life.

westsan · 2022-01-03T04:57:05+00:00

It means only the alphas are balling. Just like in the monkey cage 🐒

Imaginary-Chipmunk35 · 2022-01-03T02:42:30+00:00

Hit in gym

eriverside · 2022-01-03T06:01:56+00:00

Step 1: realize that women, all of them, are real people with their own will, agency, interests, goals, dreams...

Step 2: realize that no one owes you sex. You don't need sex. You want it.

Step 3: Meet people for the sake of meeting people with similar interests. Doesn't matter if its men or women as long as you enjoy their company. This will help you grow as a person. In the process, you'll meet women you actually respect, or will get set up on dates by new friends who don't think you're total creep.

Step 3 works as long as you remember step 1 and 2.

aidsjohnson · 2022-01-03T04:01:46+00:00

If you're average looking you just gotta try and become one of the ones who gets laid. Personally, I've never gotten pussy without paying for it, but one of my New Years resolutions is to work on that and fix it. Good luck, king.

originalgainster · 2022-01-03T03:32:01+00:00

Source of that stat?

maybe we were just born at the wrong time, maybe this just isn’t the time period for young average looking guys to experience the pleasures of intimacy/dating.

maybe. or maybe you go out and socialize more.

willgo-waggins · 2022-01-03T05:53:07+00:00

Sorry but some of us while not young anymore have certainly not changed our sexual habits.

So the women are simply sleeping g lire with older guys.

I can tell you why also. It comes directly from a much younger (and two others now as well as my older ones) FWB. She prefers guys that are older - and generally older than forty. I’m 51 and not the oldest guy she’s been with. She says (and again I have heard now multiple variants) that those guys under forty or so are just worthless. No respect. A lot of the time no job or place or vehicle (important where I am). And they generally are into things that she is not. And crazy thing is she is a lifelong athlete and outdoors person. And the last thing is that the sex sucks. Two pump chumps and ED problems.

shaggy2gay · 2022-01-03T06:00:13+00:00

stats are for nerds, do cold approach

RPslimjim · 2022-01-03T06:00:59+00:00

Don’t worry about men as a whole. Worry about yourself. Improve yourself. Worrying about the lack of pussy most men get does nothing for you getting pussy.

Fact of the matter is most guys on this sub are ugly, fat, and not accomplished. A girl shouldn’t like them. Men have to become and women just are. Men are not loved unconditionally. Get with the fucking program and improve yourself.

I’m getting sick and fucking tired of the little bitches on her crying when they cold approach (which is dead btw) but they live at home with mom, have shit hygiene and are overweight or skinny fat.

Literally the formula is simple. Work on yourself, improve your look. Just being in shape will improve your look you don’t have to be jacked but a Michael Phelps swimmer body will make you look much better. Play with haircuts, facial hair, and well fitting clothes. It’s not that fucking hard.

PUT IN THE FUCKING WORK.

HatchimalSam · 2022-01-03T02:13:13+00:00

Even if somehow the implications of these stats are true, it’s not like the world is practicing polygamy today. It’s not like each great, good-looking guy has 10 wives.

Women are still available. Even if they don’t wanna hook up with you at a club, they’re still fully date-able. IMO at least...

devnasty009 · 2022-01-03T00:09:52+00:00

I think I can actually answer this. Porn causes severe sexual problems for young men - ESPECIALLY when they start jerking it before having real sex. While the women may also be watching porn, it’s not affecting them in the same capacity therefore they are still able to bang dudes with no problems.

cool1-- · 2022-01-03T02:32:09+00:00

Chad always wins. PUA is cope

blue_barracuda · 2022-01-03T05:07:14+00:00

Wow. There's a lot to unpack here.

First off, what a crock of shit. This is a FANTASTIC time to date given that a lot of women loathe online dating, and they're chomping at the bit to meet a man in person.

Second, why would girls want you? Are you attractive? Are you fit? Do you have hobbies? A good job? Emotionally balanced? Assertive? Seriously, so you don't get boy scout points for just being alive.

Third, and most importantly - WOMEN ARE NOT FUCKING OBJECTS. They will date and fuck the highest value person that they can - just like guys do!

A defeatist attitude will get you nowhere. If you came here just the bitch and moan, this isn't the sub for you. This is a sub for people who actually want to improve their dating lives.

Otec_Fedor · 2022-01-03T04:00:56+00:00

Leave the US if you can.

Blackmagician · 2022-01-03T03:46:36+00:00

Less competition if you’re one of the ones who don’t give up. If you’re a teen or early 20s it probably seems hopeless but it becomes much easier as you age and work on yourself.

Giving up now just means you’re fucking yourself over in the present and giving up on future you.

Alphaojo · 2022-01-03T03:48:12+00:00

There’s hope because they come to your house for the online version of you and leave with a cream pie from the real you

solstone109 · 2022-01-03T05:37:56+00:00

By getting on with your life and not worrying about it 😴

Rairaijin · 2022-01-03T05:51:33+00:00

Let me quote a pregnant feminist real quick,"I need to know the baby's sex to know if either I keep it or it's an abortion" how can men date if women are turning misandrist and androcidal for fear of our loins being castrated entirely

Mrcopeland25 · 2022-01-03T03:01:19+00:00

stop feeling like you are entitled to a women first off. no woman ever fell for the wo is me incel crap. Realistically, try to better yourself every day even how you socialize with women. i guarantee you it will be hard and you may get frustrated but you will achieve your goals if you work towards them and are accepting of criticism and can adapt. women want to have wec you just have to model yourself after someone that is confident and sexy.

Nofapdeity · 2022-01-03T03:04:08+00:00

That’s the thing, there isn’t.

Pinchematt · 2022-01-03T05:14:44+00:00

Don't worry, I don't plan on being around forever and the odds will get better then.

Goku-m · 2022-01-03T05:21:52+00:00

You’re not suppose to believe there’s any hope, you’re not suppose to even hope. That’s a losers mentality, you’re suppose to try with varying degrees of methods until you see success.

stanthemilkman88 · 2022-01-03T06:01:17+00:00

If you believe that and embody that then you're right, it is not going to happen. You need to break into the sexually desirable categories. Go to the gym, become pro social, have an interesting life and try.

Hope is not a strategy. There is no soul mate.

jackzander · 2022-01-03T06:03:53+00:00

Citation needed.

It's good to assure yourself that the data you worry about is real, so let's do that first.

18cmOfGreatness · 2022-01-03T06:11:32+00:00

Do you realize that this is mathematically impossible for men to have less sex than women, right? Unless 2/3 of sex women have is lesbian sex, which is not.

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