"Emotional labour" is the term women use when they emotionally abuse men.

After reading this, I started thinking about the all too common story of the husband who has no self-confidence left. Reading this, however, really set me off to writing this post.

"Emotional labor is the regulation of one’s feelings at one’s job." Although, as acknowledged by the article linked, the meaning has been stretched to mean, "Women planning things."

Both cases of "emotional labour" (and all other cases that include its stretched definition) have one thing in common: an abusive woman.

Picture this: You're a husband who works a job, and are trying to help around the house. Good for you, right? Except, before anything else, you'll be berated for not being a perfect mind-reading magician and doing so earlier.

Then comes the fun part: Nothing you do will satisfy her. You'll be scolded and called "incompetent" for getting the tiniest of details wrong. You're not good enough, and you never will be. Not unless you read her mind perfectly, because she can't bother explaining things to you; she shouldn't have to.

Any confidence you had in yourself is gone, and you stop doing those things you wanted to; you always get them wrong, anyways. This is the real kicker: Now you'll be blamed for not doing enough. You're now a lazy bum, a manchild, a mama's boy. You depend on her for everything, and she can't take it, so she takes it out on you. "I don't have to ask you to help! You should know already!". That's the part that gets you. "You should know already." You should already know what she needs help doing. You should already be doing the thing. You should already know exactly how to do the thing, to the last detail. You should already know all that, and the only reason you don't is because you're not good enough.

But oh no, you're not the victim in all this; she is, because she's doing the "emotional labour". Stop thinking your feelings are valid; they're just a manifestation of your "fragile male ego" that "needs constant appeasing". She doesn't need to caress your ego. You need to be the man she needs you to be, because you're not good enough.