Why do women complain about u paid labour at home?

SodyPops17 · 2022-01-17T02:29:20+00:00

Leave it to them to complain about having to raise and care for their own children in the home that they chose to have, and say that they deserve to be paid for it.

VeteranOfDepression · 2022-01-17T03:34:39+00:00

Are you talking like cleaning the house while your husband actually goes out to make money? Cleaning your house isn't a source of income. Women are, what, 80% of consumers? I'd say it's not unpaid labor if they buy themselves shit with their husband's hard earned money.

I learned as a kid that doing shit around the house wasn't going to get you money because it's not a job. Nobody can pay you for cleaning your own house if there's nobody making money.

tieredbeard · 2022-01-17T04:23:10+00:00

Men are also 24/7 security guards

Aedrian87 · 2022-01-17T05:23:54+00:00

Mostly, because of feminist indoctrination. There are a few valid reasons that rarely affect those complaining, such as the loss of continuous employment and potential professional development from it, and lack of thinking ahead until facing the consequences.

Smart and moral enough people will discuss it beforehand though, one of my uncles is a lawyer and so is his wife. He had his own small firm, she was corporate before they decided to have a child. What did they do? My aunt took half a year as a sabbatical, while still doing consultations at the firm she worked at for the last trimester and first three months of recovery, and my uncle became a stay at home dad, because his wife had higher potential growth opportunities.

ApprehensiveMail8 · 2022-01-17T15:43:34+00:00

My problem with this is that if somebody has a partner who literally pays their expenses then it is not at all accurate to call what they do in exchange "unpaid".

ThePigmanAgain · 2022-01-17T20:04:31+00:00

"I just made my own breakfast. Gimme money."

-- Random Woman

Potato-with-guns · 2022-01-17T03:03:57+00:00

Do note that though men do more paid work hours and women more unpaid, the average work hours of both paid and unpaid about averages out between the genders. Though I do support the idea of a UBI which should be just enough to survive and you should have to work to make anything significant.

TAPriceCTR · 2022-01-17T05:03:07+00:00

because marriage is a woman's retirement plan and they don't realize that his work is paying for her retirement.

EnvironmentalWar4627 · 2022-01-17T02:41:43+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2022-01-17T04:38:25+00:00

Guess women that stay at home, being a SAHM ,they look at it more as a job than a perk ? Cleaning behind everyone not feeling appreciated . My only guess . Personally don't stay home myself so I get financial compensation for all time spent at my job.

2wicky · 2022-01-17T06:31:18+00:00

They have every right to complain about it, but lucky for them, we live in an age were woman can leave the house, get a job and earn their own money. If they don't want to do the unpaid labour at home, they can now afford to hire someone to do that work for them. Just like when I don't want to or have the time to mow my lawn, I'll hire someone to do it for me.

MRA-Sid · 2022-01-17T07:06:19+00:00

They are habitual of complaining unlike men who are programmed to do sacrifices for everything.

Valeriopocoserio · 2022-01-17T08:51:05+00:00

exactly because at this point is cheaper having a hooker whenever you wish rather than a wife.

I mean unpaid escort vs paid one

At least the latter won't fuck you up for years after being divorced and not fucking

McFeely_Smackup · 2022-01-17T17:26:17+00:00

"unpaid labor" is a synonym for "being an adult".

Men are raised from birth to understand that they will work until they die, or they can sleep in a ditch.

Women are raised to believe "you're entitled to everything you want, every bit of effort you expend is unfair and oppressive, everything is a man's fault"

It's not too difficult to understand why so many adult women come across like whining children when they're expected to be an adult

Iceman_Hottie · 2022-01-17T09:01:54+00:00

It is because we value the things we do and tend to take for granted the things others do for us when we are not around. Add to that the aspect that women tend to complain more and you have that situation.

In relationships these complaints based on perseption psychologically prime people to have more and stronger complaints about their partner and starts a negative self-re-enforcing loop that makes you dislike your partner. Not a death sentence in of itself, but starts taking things in that direction.

Rol9x · 2022-01-17T09:22:39+00:00

Because slaving for a company is more fulfilling.

Alkoholisti69420 · 2022-01-17T23:39:39+00:00

Some women actually do this? Tf is wrong with people. Never heard or seen this before. Maybe it's because I live in Finland, is this something that is common speficially in America?

OrwellianHell · 2022-01-18T01:00:38+00:00

Complain is what women do. Women even created a formal academic field for it - feminism.

djc_tech · 2022-01-17T16:52:41+00:00

But “MuH EmTioNaL LabOr”!

I’ve heard this so many times. What? Do you think I like waking up at 445 to get to work and bust my ass and have the stress of I knowing people rely on me to provide for them? Oh.::and when I do have a tough time I’m told to man up and just get to work. Women have all these complaints and groups and guys get shit on constantly. You can’t even say anything without someone complaining about what you said. You are always told to work harder without any concern for your mental health.

Who has been yon a dating site recently? How many women’s profiles do you see if them out traveling to exotic locals or the beach. Out in their girls trips at wine country or in Europe.

See that with guys profiles? Nope…most of my friends are like me…go out fishing or skiing but mostly they’re at work. I don’t get to go on “guys trips” to Europe and whore it up. I get to go to work to earn money to live, pay child support, and scrimp up enough to take my kid on vacation with me for a few days to see my parents out of state.

So when I hear those arguments I’d gladly change places and take care of the kid and receive child support as you bust your ass…dude taking care of kids isn’t that hard. Just be involved and put sticky notes on your fridge so you remember shit…done…

simppymcsimp · 2022-01-17T10:49:15+00:00

It's scraping the barrel. When you have it so good, they just come up with new ways to appear the victim

IronJohnMRA · 2022-01-17T14:05:28+00:00

Feminists taught them to do this. It started with Betty Friedan in the 1960's.

crciv · 2022-01-17T14:11:17+00:00

The complaint isn’t that people should be paid for unpaid labor. The complaint is that unpaid labor should be seen as a valuable contribution to a family’s livelihood. That means recognizing that unpaid labor is not dependent on paid labor, but that they both depend on each other.

WingsofSky · 2022-01-17T15:41:05+00:00

When you live by #doublestandards and #sexism. Then it's like that.

TracyMorganFreeman · 2022-01-17T18:01:08+00:00

Because they take things for granted. A stay at home parent is at a minimum paid in room and board, plus whatever amenities exist in the home like TV, internet, etc.

thinkb4youspeak · 2022-01-17T05:26:58+00:00

Its the misandry coalition and shills complaining. In a healthy loving relationship house tasks are shared and mitigated inside and out, can even be healthy competition in good fun in a trusting back to back against all type love. The ones running up a tab about it are women or shills who have never seen or experienced this and have an agenda to gain by trying to make it have ideological value through eloquence. You can't show them that sharing the burden together is the best way bcz they want a " fairy princess but really the queen" type life of luxurious ease and praise but also control and command of your day to day for their imagined sacrifice of existing. Trust me there are many dudes that exhibit this same type of behavior but its way easier to put this equality acknowledgment here than to edit later and appear to backpedal like I didn't consider that kind of ridiculous backlash after OP specifically clarified women in the title. I challenge anyone who has dated this type of person to say I'm false.

There are definitely women and men out there who take more than their share of the burden like way more! They are the type of people who want their partner to care and love them and just manage their share. They don't keep a bill. They either get through to their partner and things get better or they leave or they stay and it get worse. That is real life yo.

lostcymbrogi · 2022-01-17T08:31:44+00:00

This is a complex issue. I don't wholly disagree with a stay at home mom or other woman in a similar circumstance pointing out they are doing unpaid labor. If the woman is parenting the argument becomes MUCH stronger. It comes down to whether or not we put value on child rearing and education and how important that is.

By equal measure if a woman is home all the time and refusing to share the familial burden, I totally think it's fair to call that out. Even if the sexual roles were reversed I don't see a substantial need in revising my opinion. If for example, we have a stay at home dad taking care of and educating the children that has real value. If he drinks beer all day and ignores his duties around the house he's a bum.

This is equality.

rahsoft · 2022-01-17T10:01:19+00:00

I've seen this C**p repeated recently on a youtube channel that discusses narcissists who impact both men and women.

this unpaid crap came up along with the woe behold me divorce hurts us the most and we lose assets and we have to have 50-50 custody "which is standard in divorce in the USA"( i kid you not). followed by a beta white knight commenter about how the manosphere is full of losers

multiple responses did point out the correction thankfully( lose assets, lose kids etc), i could only add about why is there the campaign to make 50-50 the law and the 22 million children in the USA involved in Parental Alienation.

these idiots( and I say idiots, some women and one or two men) manage to take a serious issue about narcissistic behaviour and turn it into a soapbox about unpaid labour and the favourable outcomes they receive in divorce .

i do everything around the home including working, plenty of my female colleagues do this as well ( without complaint). Those with partners share everything including working, childcare and the "unpaid" labour.

I think that some of this mentality is down to the idea that these people think that cleaning a house and looking after children are demeaning jobs that should be done by servants.

if you want your male partner to do household and childcare( assuming they dont do so already) then roll up your sleeves and clean out the car, the gutters, the trash can and every other dirty, difficult and Dangerous job that you expect your male partner to do..without complaint..

Odd-Box-3578 · 2022-01-17T12:32:46+00:00

Funniest thing is, if they got paid to do that stuff they just turned themselves into a maid or housekeeper, not a mother or wife

Eleutherlothario · 2022-01-17T14:30:00+00:00

The last study on home labour done by the UN specifically excluded the types of jobs done by men (home repair, vehicle maintenance, etc.) and went on to conclude that women do more unpaid labour then men. Quelle surprise. That led to the usual bleating by the activists and the usual headlines from the media. This of course leads to more feminist-written legislation by the government.

Not an accident.

1dark_m8 · 2022-01-17T10:38:59+00:00

You are right; housework and nursing is their role.

throwaway2222aa3 · 2022-01-17T11:53:59+00:00

They want the government to be their husband.

iamjesus1991 · 2022-01-17T14:15:15+00:00

The emotional labour really gets me. I understand it isn't easy supporting people emotionally, but that's what being in a relationship is about. Being there to support one another. It's seemingly a common issue I've seen, especially online, that women complain about and it's ridiculous.

ABBucsfan · 2022-01-17T14:36:22+00:00

If you think that's funny look up the term emotional labour or mental load.... They keep coming up with new things to complain about hoping it sticks. Emotional labour was a legit term in 70s for service Jobs and putting up with people's crap with a smile. Now they've hijacked it to mean... Well they can't agree exactly from what I can see.

The complaining about housework seems to be a holdover from the old days when women didnt work and pretty much everything around the house and the guy just put.his feet up. There was a transition period where they started working but guys didn't take on any extra house duties. Today I'm pretty sure most couples split them a lot more equally.. the difference being that it's usually the case even when the wife stays home when the kids are young...or course they will point to the odd case where a traditional minded guy will refuse.. but most guys I know do their share

Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2022-01-17T15:49:48+00:00

Zero turn mowers are fun btw . Stress relief . Put on your ear buds , music and mow.

xcheshirecatxx · 2022-01-17T16:37:32+00:00

Depending on living situations, the 2 roles can be massively unequal

For example, outside work while living in an apartment and not having a car will mean almost no chores

Or living on a country side small farm without kids will mean way more chores outside

BeanBodhi · 2022-01-17T18:01:08+00:00

I’d like context because I feel you have probably very much misunder

theythinkuWenbatshit · 2022-01-17T19:26:55+00:00

What's this unpaid labor thing springing from? I've been under a rock for about a month and haven't seen any articles about it.

Extra-Strike2276 · 2022-01-17T21:55:34+00:00

If you're both working equal hrs you should be doing equal work at home. If she's a stay at home mom, and you both agreed to that, then should have equal access to money. My wife has never complained about needing money for the amount of work she does at our house. Then again I work 70hrs a week and she maybe does a few hrs a housework a week and deals with the kids 24/7. She also is the one that deal with the bills and buying what everyone needs. I really don't care about money or stuff in general. I just put money away for retirement and $100 for me, she free to get whatever she wants after that.

When I was younger I cared more about who got what. Honestly though if you can't trust your wife with your money, then you have other problems. I've tried many ways over the last 20 years and it's worked best when I just keep what I need for the week and retirement, and give her access to the rest. The years I paid for everything she was always wanting more. Once I had her start paying out the bills she realised the cost of her decisions and started planning better. She's also far happier, which makes me happier in the long run.

There were a few years where I did basically everything. I'd start my day by getting the kids ready for school and out the door. Come home 12hrs later and clean and cook dinner and get the kids in bed all while she laid around watching tv all day. I put up with it far to long, and can understand a women's point of view if she is doing the same. My wife had reasons for it (which I won't go into detail, but really weren't good reasons), but things got better when I started planning for her not being around. If you're both working and you don't do anything around the house she has reasons to be mad about it. Even if she doesn't make what you do, you should still be helping take care of the house hold duties. If she is a stay at home mom, that also didn't mean she does everything. If my wife is doing something around the house and I'm home I help because the idea of just watching her seem rather selfish.

coming2grips · 2022-01-17T22:13:55+00:00

IMhO

Because they and we are no longer learning the value of improving the state and status of the household through our own contributions and instead are taught from a young age to seek only the rewards of instant gratification; the self is the only goal.

Before, contribution to the home may have been a salary OR work towards maintenance and improvement. Now we wait or Hunt for a home that meets desires and wonder why we have to work so hard to be entertained

RubMobile2126 · 2022-01-17T23:09:38+00:00

I had to handle this situation with a girlfriend after she moved in. She stated that she wanted to split up the chores evenly. I told that her I would love help with the chores especially mowing the lawn and cleaning the gutters. You wouldn't believe how quickly she said that those were a man's chores. I said if you want me to do all of the traditional man stuff then you are going to do all of the traditional woman stuff. She let it go after that.

Embarrassed_Ant6605 · 2022-01-17T23:20:55+00:00

Here’s the thing, most normal women don’t complain about unpaid labour at home, just like most normal men don’t either, because cleaning, cooking, laundry, property maintenance, childcare and helping out elderly relatives isn’t labour. It’s just taking care of yourself and your family, it’s what people are supposed to do.

The only people complaining are the activists and crazy extreme feminists

Big_Dick_No_Brain · 2022-01-18T00:06:49+00:00

I knew a guy that spent a weekend servicing his wife’s car, did a complete service, detailed inside and out, did a cut and polish on the paint work. Really put a lot of effort and elbow grease into making the wife’s car look amazing. When she saw it, it was just “ meh “ Not impressed at all. A few days later while she was out shopping, he dusted and vacuumed the house. She was ecstatic.

Now this would confuse some, the difference is looking after the families cars was his job and carried no weight in her mind, while the vacuuming and dusting work he did saved her from having to do it.

mikesteane · 2022-01-18T03:19:43+00:00

"If I had to pay to have these jobs done, I'd pay a man and have them done properly" William Donaldson writing under the name "Henry Roots"

Mahameghabahana · 2022-01-17T12:53:35+00:00

I agree that we should pay housewives and househusbands as long as they pay the breadwinners for bringing money to the household.

/S

thetruegardenhobbit · 2022-01-17T21:43:45+00:00

Just think I should play a bit of devils advocate from the perspective of a working mom (husband prefers to be home and raise his daughter because he never got the chance to with his first child). Of course I can't speak for all women but when I was a stay at home mom I did deal with a bit of this frustration so figured I'd share my two cents.

The issue I found wasn't quite that I felt I should've been paid for taking care of my home and family, but rather the stress of knowing that the income of one adult never seems to be enough to provide for an entire family (an issue we still face). And then the obsurd cost of daycare vs the rate that daycare workers are paid, essentially we'd have to pay more than half of one's salary to have someone who gets paid $10 to watch our kid. Idk about anyone else but I want to be sure my child gets quality care and I'm not sure someone making less than a McDonald's worker would care to provide that.

The frustration from mom's at home thinking they're doing "unpaid" work I think comes from overarching frustration that women are expected to work because a household typically cannot function very well with only one income, but knowing that going to work would mean more money lost along with time lost with your child.

So for me (someone who has worked since age 16 and feels useless when not providing my own source of income) I felt pretty useless at home. And I think a lot of women rationalize that feeling by adding up all the housework and other "work" they do on a daily basis and feel as if they're coming out on the tail end of it. Because oftentimes people will downplay the difficulty of being at home because it isn't paid.

Not sure if any of that made sense in the end, but im sure yall will let me know if it didn't. No disrespect here, no argument. Just trying to put in some different perspective.

Title	Why do women complain about u paid labour at home?
Author	i_dont_know_2000
Upvotes	251
Comments	199
Date	January 17, 2022 2:26 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/s5sidr/why_do_women_complain_about_u_paid_labour_at_home/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/why-do-women-complain-about-u-paid-labour-at-home.1097129 https://theredarchive.com/post/1097129

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