8 Reasons Why I Can't Stand Modern-Day Feminists

SplinterClaw · 2013-07-14T19:19:27+00:00

Did you delete this from Two-X or did someone delete it for you?

AndresDM · 2013-07-15T00:01:12+00:00

i really love the last point she made. its not about competing with the other gender, but it should be more about complementing each other.

sth21 · 2013-07-14T19:15:51+00:00

Is this woman single? I want to take her out to a nice seafood dinner and call her shortly after dinner to arrange a second date.

moonphoenix · 2013-07-14T22:08:28+00:00

5) They get offended too easily and make women look crazy. Feminists make everyone walk on eggshells and are constantly awaiting the opportunity to show everyone how educated they are about the evil patriarchy and feminism in general. Anything negative said about women will be promptly used as a feminist's platform to tell everyone how misogynistic and brainwashed they are.

Finally, Not enough people get this point. Being able to laugh at yourself is a great merit. And I'd respect the movement of feminism more if they managed to be more calm.

M4Strings · 2013-07-14T19:24:36+00:00

It's so nice to see women speak out against modern feminism. People are finally getting wise to their chronic victimization complex.

saint2e · 2013-07-14T22:07:48+00:00

There's a re blog with someone yelling at her that yes she is a feminist. I laughed at the irony.

linguiphile1 · 2013-07-15T00:22:56+00:00

I appreciate this post very much and I appreciate how it's not alway easy to talk about your own group (gender, race, etc) so objectively. It's great to see these facts presented in such an organized way!

2013-07-15T01:12:03+00:00

Neither gender is better than the other. Our differences work together in a beautiful symbiotic way

Yes! I've always believed that men and women are different, but in a Yin-Yang kind of way.

This documentary from my country (don't worry, it's subtitled) underlines nicely how ignorant we are about this in Scandinavia. We refuse to believe there are biological differences.

ChokinMrElmo · 2013-07-14T20:26:59+00:00

I enjoyed the last bit about the NAFALT messages. It always astounds me when people say, "we're not all like that!"

True, but it reminds of my encounters with Christians when the subject of hating homosexuals comes up. They say the same thing, to which I respond, "Yes, obviously not all of you are like that, but the most vocal are. So what are you doing when you hear these people speak? Do you refute their opinions, and if they are unwilling to hear it, ostracize them from your life? Or do you do what I believe you do, and simply let their ignorance slide? Do you let them perpetuate this negative image of what you believe- perverting it to meet their own agenda?"

Instead of relying on a technicality to improve their image, they should be actively changing image by cutting these people out. Instead of telling us, "we're not all like that," they should be telling that to the people who are creating this negative image.

2013-07-14T21:46:20+00:00

Wow. That was very well written. Simple and to the point.

2013-07-14T20:00:17+00:00

This is a woman with a level head.. a thinker. Cheers.

Always_Doubtful · 2013-07-14T22:24:14+00:00

Theres alot of things feminists never bring up, they leave alot of things buried under a mountain of shit. For a movement of empowered women they have not a damn clue that actual empowered women were even alive.

Fact is that single childless women make more money over their lifetime than single men and you'll never heard that from a feminist .. EVER

Zosimasie · 2013-07-14T22:52:45+00:00

3. They claim to want equality, but expect special treatment.

Equal Right Amendment - Hayden Rider Provision

The provisions of this article shall not be construed to impair any rights, benefits, or exemptions now or hereafter conferred by law upon persons of the female sex.

What's that you say about "equality"?

ChaoticParadox · 2013-07-15T02:23:35+00:00

There should be an app for smartphones similar to Lulu that identifies feminists so we can just stop interacting with them altogether. If they want to hate and fear men, then we will give them exactly what they want. We'll just start ignoring and not even acknowledging them.

2013-07-15T13:00:58+00:00

Feminists are the most blindly ignorant people you will ever meet.

2013-07-15T18:39:37+00:00

For a long time (but especially since the early 3rd wave era) Feminism has been little more than a linguistic exercise. It's all about pushing political correctness to control the narrative, making it easier for Feminists to get more and more welfare programs for women with little objection.

takahashi1989 · 2013-07-14T21:46:51+00:00

I wouldn't classify a woman with those view points as a feminist...its sad that it's the stereotype. I don't know feminist like this, but I know a lot of women like this. I'm always the first to call them on their bullshit. I consider it one of feminisms biggest concerns, and its something I work with people on consistently. I wouldn't cut someone off for being that way though I may spend less time around them. My mother is this way, though she wouldn't classify herself as a feminist, and she's not.

nuchamploo · 2013-07-14T21:44:10+00:00

I cried....tears of Joy TvT

Babill · 2013-07-15T09:05:31+00:00

This blog post is a copy pasting of a blog post from another blog that's been posted here some time ago. It was something like "eat sleep weed".

2013-07-15T10:45:08+00:00

Slow clap, building into furious applause.

VideoLinkBot · 2013-07-15T13:12:15+00:00

Here is a list of video links collected from comments that redditors have made in response to this submission:

Source Comment	Score	Video Link
I_am_Norwegian	3
I_am_Norwegian	3
I_am_Norwegian	3	CNN Report Study Finds Post Feminism Women Are LESS HAPPY!!!!
I_am_Norwegian	3	The Gender Equality Paradox - Documentary NRK - 2011
AryoBarzan	2	mras and feminists arguing at u of t mra event
AryoBarzan	2	Warren Farrell protest at the University of Toronto - Full version
I_am_Norwegian	2	Dr Coutinho, the feminists and the male contraceptive pill

2013-07-15T14:02:12+00:00

Accountability needs a mention - or lack thereof - modern feminism does not have this at all whatsoever.

Jovianmoons · 2013-07-15T15:33:33+00:00

Excellent summary! I'm saving it for future reference material.

Noel_S_Jytemotiv · 2013-07-15T18:21:21+00:00

I CANNOT stand modern day feminists because they are they ones I have to deal with.

wait_for_ze_cream · 2013-07-14T22:42:13+00:00

This is a pretty recent repost and essentially whines about a stereotype. How the hell does this help men's rights in any real way?? Or does it just make you feel better when you read it?

Kirkayak · 2013-07-15T00:11:54+00:00

They claim to want equality, but expect special treatment.

Sometimes special treatment is required to bring about a certain kind of desirable equality, as when a superior player is handicapped for a game of Go (as one example).

I am not saying that women in the modern West actually need such systemic advantages regarding most of the things feminists claim they do, but only that the idea of special treatment for the purpose of equality is not an entirely laughable idea.

2013-07-15T00:45:10+00:00

Wow. Intelligence on Tumblr? Am I awake?

goolalalash · 2013-07-14T23:34:05+00:00

[permanently deleted]

goolalalash · 2013-07-15T00:40:10+00:00

Read the comment below first, I'm wordy. Sorry. ;)

4) "They trivialize rape by broadening it’s definition into the grounds of consensual sex." Umm, this one is especially egregious. This is my area of study. I have definitely read more lit on this than most people and have presented several papers on this very topic at conferences. I am currently working on my thesis that is about rape and sexual assault and have another independent study going outside of my thesis about it. Not once have I ever read that a woman can't consent when she is drunk. In fact, I love to fucking party and I love to get laid when I'm drunk (I only say this to point out that we are all human, and most of us have enjoyed some sloppy drunk sex.) HOWEVER, feminists do talk about the fact that date rape often occurs when alcohol is involved, alcohol often encourages more sexual activity, etc. The argument is simply that in many instances a PERSON may choose to go home with another PERSON and once they get to it, one PERSON may change their mind...sadly our society (scientific evidence proves this, if you want the studies I will find them) has this odd perception that once a person says yes they can't change their mind. Now, when I say this, I do not mean that all men think like this, but there are overarching themes in which this seems to be a common opinion. In fact, I think most men in here are pretty smart, and from reading around in here, you all seem like great people. So don't for a second try to come back with some "not all men think this" bull shit because I am making it clear here that BOTH sexes can be affected by this and openly recognizing that not all men are like this.

5) "They get offended too easily and make women look crazy." No, nearly every single one of my friends, men and women, are feminists. We actually are some of the most sarcastic and offensive people you may ever meet. We don't get offended easily, we are simply conscious of ways in which society disadvantages all people and part of feminism is learning to politely teach people when something is sexist. We aren't offended, we are just aware. As for the crazy part, ummm no. Women who beat their husbands, go through their phones, stalk them, fake pregnancies or lie about taking birth control make women look crazy. I have never met a single person who though me or any of my friends were crazy. Surprisingly (I guess), we are all pretty chill and never mad. Once again, essentialization at it's worst.

6) "Feminists fail to see the redundancy in the modern-day feminist movement." Nope. Modern day feminists are usually concerned about things like sex education, high rates of sexual assault (against men and women), reproductive justice. So fine, all of these have been talked about by feminists before us, but the fact of the matter is all the of these problems still exist. In the 60's comprehensive sex education wasn't legal in schools, guess what? IT STILL ISN'T LEGAL. Sexual assault is very prevalent in our society. Studies suggest that 1 in 4-6 women is sexually assaulted and 1 in 33 men is sexually assaulted. That's a shit ton of people for both sexes. You may think these numbers are made up, but as I've said in here before I was molested at 3 and sexually assaulted at 19. So yea, we have laws to protect us against this crap, but at 3 years old I didn't know what the fuck was happening, and when I finally talked about it I was 12...THAT SUCKS BECAUSE OUR LAWS FUCKING PREVENTED ME FROM PRESSING CHARGES. Thank you statute of limitations for making child molesters hobbies a lot fucking easier. Yea, we have laws that "protect" us but that doesn't mean they fix anything. They are merely treating the symptoms of a problem rather than preventing the problem from happening. Reproductive justice, yea...it may seem repetitive, but lets get real, abortion and birth control seem to be something republicans don't think women have a right to. If you don't recognize this, you need to get your head out of your ass. This doesn't mean I think I am a victim, merely that society is pretty ignorant on these issues.

7) "Feminists refuse to acknowledge that the gender pay gap is the result of women’s choices, not sexism." Lolz, you all seem to be pretty smart when it comes to developing full arguments, yet you let this woman get away with not making a complete argument. She only makes claims. So yea, women typically enter the engineering and science fields. This has long been recognized as an issue of sexism. These fields are typically recognized as "masculine" disciplines. Oh, and believe me...if Haliburton, Schlumberger, Highmount, or any other big oil production company would hire me to work on the rigs I would. I already know a shit ton about the work because I have learned a lot from my dad, but who wants to make the bet on the likelihood of me being hired to do any of that manual labor, despite the fact that I am fully capable. So, here begs the question...is it just because men are stronger than women?

8) "Feminists refuse to acknowledge that men and women are different." Wrong again. We recognize that there are physical differences between men and women, but what we refuse to defend is that women are less capable to do math and science. That women can't be president because they're too emotional. Look, we recognize that differences exist, but not to the extent that society would like us all to believe.

So, here's the deal. I don't think that any of you should call yourselves feminists. I just think you all should take some time to help cross the bridge, such as feminists like me have tried to do in this group, and develop arguments that consist of more than some woman's tumblr with a bunch of ad hom attacks that categorize all feminists as the same. Talking shit about all of us gets us nowhere. You don't have to think that feminism will solve your problems. I am not asking you to do that. But I don't think it is that hard to recognize that 1) we are not all the same, just as you all are not the same 2) talking shit is a waste of time and doesn't help you solve any of your problems any more than feminism does 3) we actually all agree that gender norms in our society are fucked up and we should work to fix those 4) maybe a discussion rather than an argument could help us come up with solutions that aren't "feminism" but solutions that everyone sees as helpful. Fine, disagreements will happen, but that isn't an excuse to just start bad mouthing each other. If you want to make a change, this sort of shit won't get you there.

goolalalash · 2013-07-15T00:39:23+00:00

So I have been posting around here randomly for a few months now. Most of you have agreed that I am not anything like what this describes, yet as someone who identifies as a feminist, these posts still place me in these awful stereotypes. I assure you I am not the exception to the rule. Most feminists are like me, but as I have said many times in here, the loudest feminists often give us a poor image. Therefore, I am going to go ahead and call you all out. Posts like these give you just as poor of an image as you attempt to give to feminists. It seems that most people in this subreddit think that feminists categorize all men in the same way. Funny, considering posts like these assume that all feminists are the exact same. You hate when feminists apparently essentialize all of you, yet, you all seem to think it's totally fine to essentialize all of us. Essentialization is the very same thing that causes the justice system to continually favor women in custody battles. Generally, women are lumped into this category of good caretaker, while men are categorized as absentee fathers. Hmm, interesting that this subreddit uses the same tactics to shit talk feminists that the court uses to ensure men are always at a disadvantage in custody battles. Essentialization is what has convinced women to always be cautious when walking alone at night because we have been taught that all men are a potential threat. Essentialization is what has caused the justice system to, as many of you say, favor women in sexual assault cases. Essentialization is what has lead to the myth in our society that only men can be abusers, never abused because women are seen as weak, men are seen as strong...meaning that it will always be hard to believe that the weaker sex could abuse the stronger sex. Many of the issues you all find important are, at least to a certain extent, caused or correlated to essentialization.

So, now I will explain to you why this post does not all accurately represent feminism.

1) "They constantly victimize my gender." Not true, most feminists recognize that EVERYONE is affected by patriarchy, sexism, and all the other isms we like to critique. In fact, contrary to this "victim" mentality, tons of feminists have written to change the language involved in this "victimization" paradox we have so often been called out for. Furthermore, many feminist authors (some who are men) believe that partriarchy is just as harmful for men because a society where men are taught to always be strong does not provide for a platform suitable for good mental health and also leads to very poor stereotypes of men. For example, Michael Kimmel and Jackson Katz are well known for advocating that "rape culture" is uniquely problematic for men because it is unfair that women are taught to constantly assume that men are potential crazy sexual predators. You see, feminism doesn't really attempt to create women as victims and men as perpetrators. It merely asserts that inequalities in society stem from sexism, that affects all people in different but equal ways.

2) "They try to convince me I'm a feminist, even when I tell them I'm not." Many feminists think that labels are really just bull shit, but as humans we typically like to put people in to categories...which sucks. HOWEVER, many people that I talk to agree that sexism is bad and that inequalities exist for all people, yet they don't identify as feminists. We really don't give a fuck how you identify, we just hope that people can recognize that sexism exists and it affects ALL people not just women. For example, I have posted in here before explaining how feminists actually want to fix the same problems you all care about, but not once did I tell any of you that you ARE feminists, rather I just tried to point out that we all agree on these issues. You can label yourself mens rights activists, I just think all this bull shit name calling and shit talking gets neither of us anywhere. Why can't we recognize our similarities and have productive conversations that don't consist of trying to demonize the other party.

3) "They claim to be for equality but expect special treatment." BULL SHIT. Read fem lit that expands beyond the mainstream lit. Fem lit that I read actually advocates that the goal of feminism is to transform the world into a place where "special" statuses are needed. As long as women, persons of color, homosexuals, etc still have to be considered "protected" classes that means several things. First, it means that these groups are still seen as "too weak" to protect themselves. Second, it means that inequality and sexist mindsets still exist. I would love to be in a world where people didn't view me and refer to me as a "minority" simply because I am a woman. I make up about 50% of the population, but because I have a vagina I am a protected class and therefore considered a "minority" population. We don't like the special protections and our ultimate goal is to remove the need to be "protected." On this whole, "we expect men to pay for us" bull shit isn't true either. The first article I ever read about feminism addresses this issue. While "chivalry" is nice in theory, it really just stems from a time when women were expected to be dependent on a man. When I go on dates, I feel uncomfortable when men pay for me because I feel like it's not fair. I have money, in fact, I generally have more money than the men I date, but they feel severely emasculated when I offer to pay. I don't hate when men open the door for me, but if a man and myself reach a door at the same time, I always open it first. Unfortunately, in Texas many older men and even younger men find it offensive and I can't tell you the amount of times I have been chastised by people for doing things like this. I opened the door for a man at the mall who was quite a bit older and couldn't get around well, he told me "That's very unlady like, you should always allow a man to open a door for you...it's our job." So you see? This problem goes both ways. Maybe some women get pissed when men change things up, but some men get pissed when women change things up.

2013-07-15T04:51:34+00:00

You are wrong, men are better than women, not mentally, we are equal there, but men are physically superior, we are bigger, stronger, and faster, just look at the world records for any physical activity

mya_rhys_faren · 2013-07-15T00:51:02+00:00

Wow, it's truly amazing how you can accurately paint an entire movement with these stereotypes. And did you know that all black men are athletic and all Asians are smart?
dictionary.com: fem·i·nist [fem-uh-nist] Show IPA adjective Sometimes, fem·i·nis·tic. 1. advocating social, political, legal, and economic rights for women equal to those of men. noun 2. an advocate of such rights.

Just because some feminists (maybe a vocal subset) are ass holes, doesn't mean all feminists are. When did being a feminist become a bad thing?

If it matters, I believe men and women should treat each other as equals. Before I was married, I never expected my date to pay for my meal. If they choose to, that's great. I'll pick up the check next time (and I make sure I do). Usually, I preferred to split the check.

TheGDBatman · 2013-07-15T03:50:11+00:00

Changing a few laws will not immediately cancel out thousands of years of social conditioning and create equality. The truth is that women are still a subordinate group even in western societies. It's true that some feminists are outspoken and demonize men, but it's also true that many, many more men are either unconsciously or consciously sexist and discriminatory towards women.

Anyways I'm upset that Men's Rights is being corrupted by "anti-feminism". It's not why I subscribed here and it's not what I want in my feed.

Riesea · 2013-07-15T15:16:26+00:00

I bet you can shorten them all into one: ~cry me a river.

Title	8 Reasons Why I Can't Stand Modern-Day Feminists
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	505
Comments	228
Date	July 14, 2013 7:01 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1iafng/8_reasons_why_i_cant_stand_modernday_feminists/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/8-reasons-why-i-cant-stand-modern-day-feminists.1168748 https://theredarchive.com/post/1168748

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