CMV: The wall for women hits around 35 at the latest. There is no wall for men. (except maybe really old)

LeJacquelope · 2018-07-24T17:09:41+00:00

What a load of weapons-grade cope.

flamingoinghome · 2018-07-24T18:08:23+00:00

Oh ffs this again. Look--do you actually see all these men getting into age-gap relationships like you're so sure they all "can"? Do you know a lot of 27-year-old women whose boyfriends are pushing 40? Because I sure don't. And do you think those random tinder girls saying your dad was hot wanted to marry him and have his babies? Or were they thinking "huh, might be fun to bang an older dude once just to see what it's like?" And have you even MET a mid-thirties woman? Most of them look fine, and very similar to their mid-twenties selves, unless they've had a bunch of pregnancies.

Also, the reason women who say they don't want kids are less likely to end up with them than similar-minded men may have something to do with the fact that they have more say in the matter. Men are much more likely to be victims of reproductive coercion than women.

RockinSocksII · 2018-07-24T16:36:11+00:00

The statistics of STIs in nursing homes begs to differ.

philomexa · 2018-07-24T17:01:01+00:00

I'm close to 40, still in great shape, still active, and the thought of having a family now is not attractive to me at all.

I would be over 60 before they were finally out of college. No way

whichbladeN · 2018-07-24T16:56:20+00:00

I think when women decide at a young age that they never want to settle down, they are much more certain than a man is when he says the same thing.

Because all women know that there's a small window to have kids, and if you're not going to have the kids, you probably don't need to convince someone to commit to you.

Kaz__Kaan · 2018-07-24T18:47:57+00:00

There’s a wall for men

To steal /u/says_harsh_things comment:

Men who get female attention from wealth and provisions never see a wall - for them, there is none. Income and status increase over time. For women, there is no equivalent to this path in life.

Men who exude raw masculinity never see a wall, as there will always be buyers for what he is selling (at least into his late 40s). They may not be the same buyers, but there will always be enthusiastic buyers.

But for the guys in between - the guys who are somewhat attractive due to their youth (and not much else), guys who are somewhat social because of circumstances (college, sports), they are the ones that will fall off sharply when those social settings are replaced with work/home life and their youth and attractiveness drop off at 30.

So, the male wall may be very real for some, but not all men. Depends on the brand.

captnjack2222 · 2018-07-24T19:25:35+00:00

There is no wall for men because men are born post-wall.

belletaco · 2018-07-24T17:19:25+00:00

As said every time this subject comes up - BALDING. There is no escape from the receding hairline. Men absolutely hit a wall and usually younger than women, but women just don't care as much about it.

321PK · 2018-07-24T16:46:00+00:00

This old crap again?? This argument just mystifies me. Why does the end of a woman's fertility excite cripples so much? I mean literally, why? What 50 year old woman wants kids anyway? If she had wanted them then she'd have had them. Maybe there are a few that regret their life choices, but I doubt if it is the army of weeping hags you envision.

My Mom is in her 50s and still gets hit on. As long as you are in shape you can get dick. There will never be a time you can't.

prodigy2throw · 2018-07-24T16:46:06+00:00

Depends on a LOT. Realistically, if a man and woman of equal attractiveness at 20 continue to maintain themselves as much as they can, the man will be better off because his accumulation of wealth and experience means more to potential partners than vice versa.

Merger-Arbitrage · 2018-07-24T16:58:55+00:00

I view "The Wall" as largely being related to the ability (or "ease") of having biological kids / family.

It comes later for men, and it would be worse if women knew that semen quality does "degrade" for lack of a better way to put it and birth defects DO rise with age for fathers. Most men simply avoid older women because they know that older women = higher chances of health problems in kids.

For men, as long as you still physically attractive and doing well financially, you can definitely have a shot at having a family at a later age than women, though.

Eventually, men do get "too old" where the much younger women they no doubt want (for having a family with) will simply start wondering about life expectancy of the man and relationship as a whole.

Looksmaxxing · 2018-07-24T16:56:16+00:00

Believing that women have a wall is cope. A 50 year old woman has a higher SMV than a 20 year old man.

wtknight · 2018-07-24T16:48:36+00:00

I don’t think that most 40 year old men can date 18 year old women, so for most men there is a wall based upon physical appearance, the effect of which can be somewhat lessened, but which does not entirely disappear, due to that man’s status and wealth

goatismycopilot · 2018-07-24T18:35:57+00:00

The average 40 plus man has absolutely hit the wall, most of them are bald and fat and they dress badly. Men hit a looks wall and they are pretty delusional about it. Women know when their looks have faded. Men look in the mirror and see the same guy they were when they were in their early 20's it is some kind of male good old days googles.

The OP is correct that an older man can start a family in a way more flexible age range and if he has money then he will absolutely be able to buy himself a younger attractive wife. But desparate Dan who is the appliances department Manager at Lowe's is not going to be banging younger local hot chicks if he puts marriage off or is back on the market after divorce. He is going to end up with his looks match. In fact my friends who are doing old lady dating and met BFs all ended up with looks match type guys ( bald and fat ) with no personalities and they all seem pretty happy.

The other option you have as a man is to buy a third world wife, my cousin did that. He wanted a younger and submissive wife and she wanted to live in a first world country where she wasn't ducking bullets from gang and drug violence. Now they are getting diovrced because he basically ignored her for several years after the novelty of having an attractive wife wore off for him.

If you are hot and you have money, even women can delay marriage and reproduction, obviously less so compared to men. But if you aren't hot and you don't have money and you put it off you will be making some compromises about who you accept as a partner. Either you lie to yourself and say this is really what I wanted or you make peace with it.

[deleted] · 2018-07-24T17:25:24+00:00

Depends on if you consider being largely relegated to BB status as hitting a wall or not.

LucyInTheSky119 · 2018-07-24T19:51:36+00:00

Men are not as attractive as they get older. I was just noticing how Chris Pratt was noticeably older looking and less attractive in the new Jurassic World movie. Men don't actually age better. It's just that aging isn't a deal breaker for women. Men for some reason lose their minds about it when a woman gets older. We just don't care as much and yes your appearance does decline with age fellas. Its just that aging is part of life and we don't punish men for it the way men punish and shame women for it.

Women would age a lot better with proper skin care and lifestyle habits. Many don't realize how bad habits like smoking, tanning, sugar consumption, lack of sleep, lack of exercise and excessive drinking age them. Even something as simple as daily sunscreen would help a lot, but I don't know any women that do it. Point is, women can look good past 35 if they take care of themselves and practice good habits too, just like men.

captnjack2222 · 2018-07-24T17:02:40+00:00

I think you're conflating the looks wall with the fertility wall. A woman can look amazing at 20 and be infertile from health issues. A woman can look awful at 42 and have an easy pregnancy. Those are rare cases, but the looks vs fertility issue does become more common in the 30-40 range.

Uncommon_Sense_12345 · 2018-07-24T16:50:33+00:00

Only RPers go on about a woman's fertility being yhe main factor. True a man who wants kids at 40 needs to marry younger for easier conception, but plenty of middle-aged men chose women close in age and just risk going the IVF route or adopting.

Both sexes need to have kids by mid-30s because ageing sperm isn't good either.

[deleted] · 2018-07-24T19:42:07+00:00

Um. No.

There is a wall for men, it's just that that wall comes a lot, lot later than it does for women, and it's based on more than physical appearance. It's also a slow decline, like a bunny hill ski slope, starting around 40 or 45. I'd say most men in their 60s are at their Wall.

I can't believe the Wall for women has to be discussed again. For women, it's a wide range, but not as wide as for men; and its onset is much sooner. A very small number of women hit the wall before 30. Some hit around 30. A plurality hit in their mid to late 30s. A smaller number can keep the Wall away into their 40s, and a very, very few make it to 50. You can't say most women hit the wall by 35; I personally think most are there by 38 and they're definitely there by 42.

If I was a 37 year old man ready to settle down, why would I want another 37 year old when there are unlimited 27 year olds who look better and are more fertile?

Sure. Except that there's a shitton of 37 year old men who couldn't attract a 37 year old woman OR a 27 year old woman if their lives depended on it.

Men don't have this problem, whether you're 32, 38, or 45 you can always push it a few more years with minimal impact.

They can do this, if and only if they understand attraction and how it works. Most men really don't.

AutoModerator · 2018-07-24T16:35:23+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

kandyapplez · 2018-07-24T20:34:39+00:00

That's my dad, random tinder girl, and he's almost 40 years older than you. Women do not have this luxury.

right away, no. whenever i post my almost 60 year old mom on IG the comments are nothing but thirsty shit from guys about her.

and yes i do see women changing their minds about starting a family in their 40s. you obviously don't spend much time in upper class careerist circles lol

anyway, go and get that 27 year old. you're right, nothing is stopping you. why do you care what post wall women think anyway? i don't think about what ugly guys think of who i date or spend time thoughtjerking about who i'm attracted to. how are we supposed to "change your view" on that

newName543456 · 2018-07-24T22:02:29+00:00

Wall for men is when you get fat and lazy.

trail22 · 2018-07-24T22:11:13+00:00

Are you friends with many single women in their mid thirties or 40's?

The only women I know who are in shape and have issues dating are in their 50's. Do some women have issues dating as they get older , sure. But usually its because they are no longer in shape.

the-4th-survivor · 2018-07-24T23:27:18+00:00

When other Red Pillers say things like this I'm assuming they're looking at guys like Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt and assuming all older men can attract younger women like they can but the truth is they're rare cases. Most guys in their 40's and 50's have more in common with Mr. Belding than with Brad Pitt. Unless you have great genes and work extra hard to take care of your appearance you're not going to be attracting 20 year olds when you're middle aged. There is at least a little bit of truth to what they say though because there are almost no older women who are seen as marriage material by younger men. At least there are some older guys who can pull it off.

Willow-girl · 2018-07-25T03:25:09+00:00

I didn't marry a rich one until I was 40, lol.

CatchPhraze · 2018-07-25T04:10:59+00:00

My dad a serial player, often had 2-3 casual girlfriends at once, settled down with a woman six years older then him at the age of 53. Why? She was the kindest most genuine woman he'd met in a long time.

Older men are rarely interested in having kids, because just like woman, they know they can't provide for them for long. Who wants to have a child when you're living on limited retirement funds, get tired before nine PM, and are going to be statistically extremely lucky to live to see the kids collage graduation? Both logically and biologically men and woman's desire to have children starts around 23, ramps up to babies rabies around 30 and by 37-40 starts falling back out, by 45 it's gone for mostly everyone. So fertilty being the deciding factor for a 50 year old man? As long as she's attractive enough he could care less about that, and much more about how their going to spend their twilight years being supportive of each-other.

This is just a revenge fantasy. Just like how cougars and MILFS are a social phenomenon. If a middle-aged woman wants sex, she is probably STILL more likely to be able to find it then a middle-aged man unless he's a sugar daddy. I don't know a single woman in my peer group who would say that settling down with someone who is going to be dead before the kids move out of the house is what they want in a partner.

[deleted] · 2018-07-25T05:16:23+00:00

Not really. All the early-mid twenties girls I know wouldn't want to be with a 35, 45, much less 55+ old dude. The idea would be pretty gross to girls in that age range tbh.

YaAmar · 2018-07-25T11:00:12+00:00

There is no such thing as the wall for women. Attractive women continue to be attractive into their 50s and onwards if they take good care of themselves, most men hit the wall at 25, if they had anything going for them to begin with, and most men only get worse looking as they age. They lose their hair or it goes thin, hairline recedes, they develop facial wrinkles, their body is running away from them even if they physically exercise, and there is no fucking way the hottest of the women in their early 20s are having casual sex with men who aren't their own age, and equally hot.

Yes, there are cuteish, thin young women dating men who are older than them, but they're doing it for money =)

desolatewinds · 2018-07-25T12:47:15+00:00

there is no wall. 90 percent of skin ageing is because of photoageing aka sun damage that can and should be avoided. cellulite is a secondary sex characteristic that most girls start to get at puberty. its because female skin is thinner so its more likely for the fat to bulge through. even if she is skinny. no sagging if the woman is fit and thin. both sexes progressively lose muscle mass as they age and their spine distorts to make a humped back appearance. thinning hair in both sexes is effectively treated with rogaine, which is the only evidence based treatment for baldness and thinning hair that i know. the more fertile thing is just stupid. there is a maternal and paternal age effect for both sexes. old fathers have a lot more autistic children and old women get more downies.

BajaBlast90 · 2018-07-25T13:24:17+00:00

I'm a female in her 20s and I can tell you that the majority of my friends are not seriously dating or settling with older men in their 40's and beyond- unless they are looking for someone financially secure to look after them or a sugar daddy situation. Or she has some daddy issues/a daddy fetish. I've always dates guys my age and I'm dating one now.

I think you're overestimating the amount of wealth that a man could accumulate over his lifetime. It's true that men with wealth do tend to be older but you can't assume that every older man has wealth and income. Ideally, as a man gets older, he is going to move up a pay grade or get returns on investments. He could still have debts to pay or miss manage his budget and lose everything. What about the men not even in that situation? There are plenty of financial unstable older men out there, to me that's low SMV.

DXBrigade · 2018-07-25T21:57:32+00:00

Why would a 27 years old woman date a guy who is pushing 40 tho ? Past 40, a man who wants to settle and have kids is dead on the dating scene.

[deleted] · 2018-07-24T20:05:43+00:00

The wall is that they've become community women. Ok for sex, but not commitment. They're like inverted nuns. I don't think it's a bad lifestyle and have enjoyed many community women.

The wall for men has a lot more to do with things where other potential is failed to be met within a much wider time frames.

VoidInvincible · 2018-07-24T20:39:48+00:00

I am 26 and can still pull 18 year old girls

Title	CMV: The wall for women hits around 35 at the latest. There is no wall for men. (except maybe really old)
Author	captnjack2222
Upvotes	3
Comments	313
Date	July 24, 2018 4:32 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/91iy8d/cmv_the_wall_for_women_hits_around_35_at_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-the-wall-for-women-hits-around-35-at-the.261398 https://theredarchive.com/post/261398

Comments