How to catch her cheating?

upfnothing · 2023-10-25T11:47:18+00:00

Why do you care? I was like you. I kept digging and even confronted an affair partner. To then learn about countless others. This gave me a realization. They are not the problem. It’s your woman’s job to not whore herself out. With whom, why, and how she cheats is not your problem. Avoid the gaslighting, disrespect, trapping, and emotional roller coaster. If you have a strong suspicion bordering on confirmation you do not need any further information. For your sanity cut her out of your life politely and move on. She’ll fight you because a cheating woman is a sinking ship and if she don’t who cares. She’s replaceable.

TheBoyBand · 2023-10-25T04:31:05+00:00

As self stated..

No fault state! Soo..

NOBODY.GIVES.A.SHIT.NOBODY!

No tips.

clear or naw 👋🏽 👋🏽 👋🏽

Edit: FILE, SERVE, get it the fuck over, have self respect instead of playing super duper detective n stuff!

WartimeDad · 2023-10-25T04:31:11+00:00

If you know, then the proof doesn’t matter, and you’ll get it soon enough.

The better trick is to confront her while recording and be calm. Hopefully she explodes in rage or something. Has divorce been initiated? Because if you already agreed to divorce then add an extra layer of don’t give a fuck.

Train your brain to not care what she does. Seemingly impossible at your stage rn but it’s where you need to get to down the road. Your goal is not to catch her cheating, it’s to divorce her quickly and at the lowest cost.

wodanob508 · 2023-10-25T13:08:25+00:00

A "No Fault" state simply means that you can get divorced without there being a fault.

That being said, if there is a fault there are usually provisions in family law to file a complaint against the offending spouse and have her removed.

In some states this is called a Divorce from Bed and Board.

Get a lawyer, tell her what you think and she will more than likely tell you to hire a PI if you don't have proof of infidelity but know there is infidelity.

Again, No fault does not mean that there can't be fault. It only means that you can get a divorce without there being a "fault" present.

For instance, if your spouse (like mine) is a raging alcoholic and will not quit drinking, you can (at least in my state; which is a no fault state) file a complaint against your spouse which will also request the court grant a separation and award temporary possession of the marital home.

Signal-Dot2326 · 2023-10-25T12:47:35+00:00

Guilt? These monsters don't feel that.

Throwawaysi1234 · 2023-10-25T14:41:42+00:00

Probably not worth it until after the divorce.

A lot of people here saying it's not worth it in a no fault state. I disagree. She is going to be blaming the divorce on you to anyone who will listen. You will blame yourself at times.

Knowing that she was the one to break vows helps there.

Here are options:

you can log into your wireless providers website and review the call and text logs. You don't see the actual texts but you see the times and phone numbers. You can use a reverse phone search on numbers that occur with great regularity or at odd hours.
you can hire a PI
if you know her pass code, at least on my state it would be legal to look through her phone

If you were in a fault state, you'd have grounds for a subpoena of her emails or texts but that's not likely in a no fault state since it has no legal grounding.

Do not try to track her with air tags or install spy apps on her phone. That is legally considered domestic stalking and will get you in hot water

Physical-Pie748 · 2023-10-25T18:22:54+00:00

you dont. dont waste your time and leave her.

hazalo9 · 2023-10-25T16:15:12+00:00

Amazon magnet GPS, don't use itags they will advise anyone around them. Voice activated recorder in car, women like to talk in the car for some reason. This is just to confirm if she is a cheater, don't continue using them or you will go down an emotional rabbit hole and end up in the same place and lost a ton of time. If she is, file for divorce and go no contact.

Capable-Profile4425 · 2023-10-25T12:25:41+00:00

Don’t do it. The only thing you’re going to do is subject yourself to things you REALLY don’t want to see or hear.

If you’re in a no-fault state, it’s not going to matter. Now, if there is potential danger to you or a child, that’s a different story, but you need to get a lawyer and get solid legal advice.

Ultimately, if you know she’s cheating, you have to make the decision on whether or not you would accept being with a woman that would do that to you. I think you deserve better.

potatotornado44 · 2023-10-25T14:37:44+00:00

Don’t waste your time on the cheating hoe.

Go find yourself a girl to bang, then make sure the ex finds out about it.

fnlbss · 2023-10-25T22:59:49+00:00

have a sit down discussion with her and discuss ending the relationship because you don't trust her. Don't need to catch her doing anything.

silmarp · 2023-10-25T17:14:53+00:00

That is no hard task dude.

Hidden cameras. Hidden VAR.
You need a VAR at her car and another where she spends most time in the house and possible one at your bed.

A var at her car is a way to get it because when she is driving she is certainly talking to her affair partner after a long night or she is talking to her friends about the ap and belittling you to them. The car is a good place because it's a place people get relaxed so almost certainly she is calling at her way to the work and back from it.

Also you can put hidden cameras at the house and leave for the weekend.

Or a PI.

Reflog1791 · 2023-10-25T12:41:31+00:00

Have her served at work.

AlexAllen7729 · 2023-10-25T16:20:50+00:00

Hire a PI. Let him get the details. Let him confirm your suspensions. You don’t need the details. If and when you need your evidence he has it.

probebeta · 2023-10-25T17:11:06+00:00

This was one of the things I was going to do as well. If you are going to be digging for dirt you will most likely find it. If you can get access, check browser history, Google maps history. Women are pretty careful but they are not that tech savvy so they miss some of these digital trails.

Honestly, if she's putting on make up more than usual, trying to dress and look better, did her hair and nails, wears perfume, this tells it all and she most likely is doing something. I wouldn't even bother finding details, it's not going to be good for you and it's kind of pointless in my opinion.

Impossible_Sport291 · 2023-10-25T18:16:07+00:00

People in this thread are acting like their experience will be just like yours. My lawyer knows my judge really well. She knows that the judge does not take kindly to adulterers. Despite being in a no-fault state, my lawyer made it highly evident that my wife cheated, and used the affair to prove why my wife moved 180 miles away, despite her claiming she needed to be away from me to be safe.

She lost that battle hard. temp 50/50, no support, I'm gonna get primary.

Any-Dare-7261 · 2023-10-25T18:50:44+00:00

It will help with alimony, spousal support, etc though. Cheaters don’t get alimony etc. best she’ll get is half of assets.

Can you get her phone, social media etc? Do that now. Cheaters will often use a google doc that is shared for msging as well. Put a tracker on her car (if you own it) then follow it if it goes to an unknown house or a father of one of your children’s friends. Hire a licensed PI in your state so they can testify also.

Put a nanny cam in the bedroom in your house to see what’s going on while your at work is another idea.

cactuscharlie · 2023-10-25T23:05:40+00:00

Like legal proof changes anything.

Is she female? Than she's cheating in one way or another.

TakeBackWhat · 2023-10-25T11:48:22+00:00

The kids iPad is inherently neutral, at least arguably. Often we forget to sign out and erase our tracks when conducting scandalous missions on devices we don’t use every day.

Also, I feel there is a dearth of published tips on what I would call DIY-P.I. work. Maybe you can read a shit-ton of final judgments via Google Scholar to see what is uncovered by successful P.I.’s in your area. Or, go meet one and ask if you can drop off donuts and sbux cards during an initial consultation. If done well, you should gather how they wound go about verifying what you seem to strongly suspect.

abhidas0 · 2023-10-25T14:34:32+00:00

Hire a good Detective or use spy tools!

ruintheirday · 2023-10-25T14:31:35+00:00

Hire a private investigator.

playerknowmore · 2023-10-25T14:44:42+00:00

Ask your attorney if they suggest that proof will help. They should have a PI they work with.

Small_Quarter_3673 · 2023-10-25T15:01:47+00:00

Just leave her don't put yourself through that kind of traumatic experience

throwaway05092023 · 2023-10-25T17:53:57+00:00

Unless you are in Florida. The new alimony statute now says:

“The court may consider the adultery of either spouse and any resulting economic impact in determining the amount of alimony, if any, to be awarded.”

Hack3rDr3w · 2023-10-28T13:09:07+00:00

Zero. Value. Waste of time. Move on.

Title	How to catch her cheating?
Author	MethodFluid5152
Upvotes	10
Comments	43
Date	October 25, 2023 4:24 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/17fwl33/how_to_catch_her_cheating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-to-catch-her-cheating.1236274 https://theredarchive.com/post/1236274

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