Post divorce dry spell

Flapique · 2024-03-21T20:09:07+00:00

This might sound lame as hell but maybe try going to church and or volunteering somewhere...

One_Cartographer_465 · 2024-03-18T20:56:46+00:00

Just last week a bartender friend (female) gave me the best explanation to this that I have heard. Context*I am coming up on 55, but in really good shape for 54, full head of hair that is still brown (good genes). I do well for myself (I run a family business).

I made a comment that I seem to have to work harder to pick up a lesser class of woman than when I was 30, Hard getting old. She (bartender) told me that, that is not the problem, but older men intimidate women in their 30s and 40s. They see an older accomplished man that, has experienced women's BS and know how to handle them (there was discussion about us men from a different time are still manly compared to the 20s and 30s snowfakes today) and dateable women are intimidates and less likely to make eye contact.

Also: I must stop using the pick up line, "honey you are a strong 6, but I can get you to a 9 if you are willing to do extra credit".

Alone_Average_3154 · 2024-03-18T06:27:03+00:00

Once you get in great shape the byproduct will be confidence. Once I cut 15lbs I got over my dry spell rather quickly. I used hinge and the bars around my city.

IMO don't ask their age who cars if she's 22 or 32, youre looking for fun just make sure she is hot to you. These girls are at the bars and clubs for the same reason as you.

Also, if you know how to dance then goto clubs and bars with dance floors. I have most luck in places like that than the sit down spots.

Academic_Mistake_751 · 2024-03-18T05:46:13+00:00

It’s just a temp dry spell my dude!

One thing-for SURE have the twin horseman , bumble and tinder, in your stable. Free versions only. Even if you have to have a buddy manage your account. It’s free, it will not make you get LESS pussy. There is no shame in it 1/3 of American singles are there.

Go to every live show, festival you can. Good luck you got it

Academic_Mistake_751 · 2024-03-18T05:09:51+00:00

I think you’re just in a rut, but you do have game. BUT, you have a bad vibe with the dating apps.

I have been seperated , aka single since 2015 , I’m 58 so imagine it being that much harder.

I am a “o natural kind of guy like you are, and I have done well in the wild. Bars, etc. I’m very comfortable there. And met a girl I called baby, 25, she was getting a hard time from the bouncer. I took up for her, she I guessed liked that, this was 2018 so basically it took me 3 years to get my game up enough that I could handle a girl like her.

So basically here I am 50 something with a girl with the most incredible body, she worked for Boyd/girls club as a fitness instructor so she went to work with a whistle and did trampoline, ride bikes etc.

I IMMeDIATELY started hitting the gym hard, I even snuck into the gym in Miami, I didn’t want her to see my late 40’s early 50’s body.

That was 2018 and I couldn’t handle her she was just too hott and, too late, I got some sage advice on YouTube “don’t fall in love with the young ones treat them like pets (that sounds bad I know , but at the time it made sense.

I found that having both bumble and tinder worked really well for me, if one didn’t deliver the other one did.

Anyway , after baby there was Mandy, she was very hott, 23, 5 8 135 pounds huge perfect tots, great . Anyway I found her on bumble so don’t dog this one of tinder canes they work when you are sleeping. Just “gray rock” all these stupid apps, or pay someone to manage them for you, and that’s it.

So now I’m with another great one, it’s been a year and a half and we are in pretty great shape. I with she would put out more sometimes, it’s Gen Z and they have …well it’s complicated.

We are actually fighting about it now. She did give me superhead like 3 nights ago. But it’s hard being me to to her she is 24, great body very hard to sleep next to, sexy body, big nipples etc.

So my dude, it’s just a dry spell, if you want ME to manage your apps I’ll do it , no charge, that for sure is NOT the reason your not getting a decent supply of ass.

I want you to go to as many live music events, festivals these are great for meeting ladies.

Best to you buddy. .

TheSwedishEagle · 2024-03-18T05:04:05+00:00

You won’t find people at bars, man. The bar scene is for young people and alcoholics.

Online dating is worth trying but you should be going to meetups and making new friends - guys and gals both. That way maybe you get invited to some parties or other events and grow your social circle.

I say this as a guy with two single good-looking female friends in their 50s. They are constantly going hiking or to classes (like photography) to have fun but also to meet men. They are out there and lonely, too.

Ok_Trade_1405 · 2024-03-18T04:33:09+00:00

I know it might sound weird, but just stop looking and focus on yourself. And you will be found. Blessings.

probebeta · 2024-03-18T00:37:25+00:00

I understand you. I've been through dry spells when nothing is working, but I've also been in wet spells when I have to choose and say no to options in front of me.

I found that complaining is loser talk. It does NOT help you. You're working out, doing the work. Keep doing that and more!

I was average, I thought gaining mass was stupid then found some different ideas, podcasts and started gaining mass, chest biceps, upper body. It changed everything!

Last night I met an 8.5. She told me I have these rules. I felt defeated but somehow I felt the courage to tell her tof* off, I do t follow rules. She still wants to meet me. Bring it on!

Keep going at it bud. Speed bumps on the road should not matter!

Reflog1791 · 2024-03-18T00:21:42+00:00

Go from decent shape to great shape.

TreetopTarantula · 2024-03-17T23:46:17+00:00

YMMV. I was just at the corner store and this young (mid 20s) chick was eyeballing me. I'm almost 50. But, she was with her boyfriend 😂

azwildcat74 · 2024-03-17T20:26:37+00:00

Play the game on Hinge or Bumble or stay dry. Who cares if anyone sees you there? They’re there too if they’re seeing you.

DivorceRecoveryMen · 2024-03-17T18:15:29+00:00

Been there done that. My life experience is it's a marathon and not a sprint. Meeting women has a high element of luck. Right place, right time. Don't overthink it. Keep working on yourself and the rest will come. Being the best father you can be when you have your kids is important. The rest will follow. Patience grasshopper. Dating for friendship is always a nice place to start. You're not trying to find the next Mrs. Right.

alexmixer · 2024-03-17T18:09:30+00:00

Escorts....

AdrianInLimbo · 2024-03-17T18:06:20+00:00

It'll pick up. Once your self esteem comes back, that's noticable, and you'll do better meeting women

Complicatedlogic · 2024-03-17T17:46:40+00:00

Sounds like it’s mental. If you could pick up before, once you understand the way the dating scene looks now, you’ll be fine. I was frustrated at first, now it’s pretty easy to talk and have fun with them. Only you can figure what’s holding you back, so give yourself a break and be patient.

karavan7 · 2024-03-17T17:37:34+00:00

Talk to every girl that you find attractive. Don't worry about the outcome. It doesn't matter. And ask for her number.

Heavy_Guitar_4848 · 2024-03-17T16:37:48+00:00

Don’t give up, just trial and error it. Have some openings lines and funny stories ready to go. Go for volume and get some phone numbers

slow-motion-pearls · 2024-03-17T16:18:41+00:00

I’m in the same situation. Tall enough (6 foot). I’m not fat or bald. Decent job. Decent car. Get absolutely nothing. Only overweight middle aged women “match” me. It’s ridiculous. Currently looking to save $ to travel abroad. Look through posts in /r/passportbros for advice

Title	Post divorce dry spell
Author	Everyonelookatme1
Upvotes	18
Comments	56
Date	March 17, 2024 4:09 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1bh19x5/post_divorce_dry_spell/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/post-divorce-dry-spell.1426007 https://theredarchive.com/post/1426007

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