Another day, another old man who marries a much younger woman from the Philippines who wonders why she doesn’t want him for who he is and is eager to start a family. Men are hypergamous.

Growing up I always have been a disaster with women. So for most of my life I have stayed away from them. This was not done intentionally on my part, it's just the way things went. I did marry, eventually... but it was a very late in life marriage. At the age of fifty, after having corresponded online for quite some time, I married a woman from the Philipines who was more than two decades younger than me. Things went well for a while but quickly went South. The problem that stood in between us the most was my inability to give her children without having to undergo expensive fertility treatments.

She insisted I undergo them anyway, I refused to be poked and prodded like an animal by doctors and have my beanbag examined in medical facilities. It was too humiliating for me, I would rather just adopt or have none at all. She disagreed... she had to have her own biological offspring at all costs.

So I said no... I put my foot down, firmly. Till here, and no further. She said: "Why don't we have a child through a donor? I would carry it and birth and it would be mine... and nobody, even the kid, would be any wiser." I said no. Hell no. I'm not going to raise another man's child, put in all my effort and resources into raising it. I just didn't want it.

My wife left me, only two years into our marriage. She was still in her twenties, and had her life ahead of her. I was in my fifties and felt like, in many ways, my life was pretty much over. I did have quite a bit of savings. And in the years that followed until my retirement, I grew out those savings more. I have some land of my own, a house of my own, and quite a bit of disposable income.

Am I the happiest man in the world? Not at all. Am I the saddest? Not at all. I'm just... me. I am sixty-four years old. I am retired. I am in excellent health. I stand 5'11" and weigh 180 pounds without an ounce of excess flesh. I have a full head of hair and beard, all of it grey. I've been told I look handsome for my age, and I keep fit. I think I look better now than I did ten years ago or even twenty years ago. Almost with each passing day, I realise the power of freedom more. And in some ways, appreciate it more too.

People told me, even here on Reddit, that I should stay away from this sub. That it was a toxic place. I believed them. But I started reading, and researching, and I realise that MGTOW is a philosophy that describes the sort of life I live and the sort of lifestyle I have quite well. A lot of it fits me to a T.

At this point in time... I know for a fact that I will never marry again. I will never enter any serious, long term relationships anymore either. But I will continue to hike, travel, climb and see the world around me. I will keep fit. Perhaps there will be women, girls, on my path at some point. I wouldn't mind a woman's soft touch. But I know how that touch can be deceitful. How that touch may be soft but underneath their skin is a core as hard as steel and as cold as ice. How a lot of the softness, the gentleness, is simply calculated to get something out of me. I am too old to be fooled. To awake to be lulled to sleep. And what remains of my life, time and the money made from a lifetime of hard work is too precious for me to share it with anyone else.

The only thing I regret right now is not having a son, grandson or just any young man to take under my wings, teach about the things I have learned, share experiences with and help out. And maybe leave my stuff to, to care for when I'm gone. That would have been sweet. Maybe I'll run into such a young soul one day. Maybe not. Either way, I'm alive. I'm a man. And I'm going my own way.