FDS is and will always remain a dating sub first and foremost. Any suggestions to rename the sub or redirect its focus will be removed and offending users banned

tomaito_tomarto · 2021-10-03T11:12:41+00:00

If scrotes have tried to get this sub banned from reddit and failed, they will probably try and take it down from within. I would totally not be surprised by men trying to play the long game. Having women join for them, contribute reasonable things for a while in order to not arouse suspicion and graadduuaalllly try and steer the sub towards an ideology that verges on extremism, all for the sake of having it flagged and deleted off reddit.

Don't underestimate the willingness of petty men to need to "win"

ExistentialJelly · 2021-10-03T15:46:54+00:00

In the past I've seen comments say that we should all kill men and so on.

Then the comment is screenshot and posted in other subs to point out how crazy FDS is. Like within an hour.

I also get crazy messages from supposed members and they are rude, insulting, and they have language slips like female and roasties etc.

It's them trying to make the group look like it's legitimately as messed up and they are so it can get shut down. They create false evidence.

If they have this kind of time, perhaps they should take a community college course or take up ultimate frisbee.

dancedancedance7 · 2021-10-03T12:25:04+00:00

Thanks mods for all your hard work. We see you and appreciate you and like having a space to discuss how to actually date to our benefit.

Xenobia95 · 2021-10-03T11:54:51+00:00

FDS is valuable in friendship spheres too, I managed to sideswipe some LVM social vampires by avoiding involvement, noticing others drinking way too much and giving me sob stories, it's not just dating it's wonderful life advice and it's helped my self confidence no end.

SunnyRaspberry · 2021-10-03T13:47:31+00:00

FDS as a name is iconic at this point. It encompasses everything I've learned from this sub. Wouldn't want it changed.

msromperstomper · 2021-10-03T13:02:15+00:00

There are a LOT of negative posts about dating - I think the ratio is like 9 negative for one positive - and while I do understand it because most men suck, it does become draining reading these posts day in and day out. I'm personally not in the mindset to date right now and FDS has been useful in helping me form strong boundaries to keep exes out, but one day I definitely would like to date again. Maybe instead of the negativity more people could embrace Female Level Up Strategy (FLUS)? I'd love to see that site grow.

Bella_Keira23 · 2021-10-03T14:25:17+00:00

I’ve always found it very strange that men hate FDS since in reality we’re trying to better ourselves enough to actually date. And it only takes common sense to realize that N/LVM do not like women helping each other out in the dating department by vetting men. FDS does not annoy the high valued man. They’d embrace it too

qualitylamps · 2021-10-03T16:49:01+00:00

I’m soon to be married but will always follow this sub as it helps reframe my mentality back to being women focused when so much of our culture centers men. I still talk to female friends/family about their dating experiences so it’s still all very relevant! Some of them don’t hear “you don’t have to give every man a chance just to be nice” from anyone BUT me.

queeninprogress · 2021-10-03T19:21:23+00:00

Ngl I'd be sad if this sub wasn't about dating anymore, because there honestly is no other space I know of that's simultaneously supportive of women who want to continue trying to date men while also encouraging us to prioritise ourselves over men. This sub is the middle ground. Radfem spaces will probably say "why are you still trying to date men at all", and basically every other space on the internet will probably tell me that there's nothing wrong with the way things are and that I'm just too picky. This sub is literally the ONLY place that seems to quite understand the way I (and it seems many other women) feel.

creamtart_ · 2021-10-03T08:11:44+00:00

Yes! Lately I’ve seen a few posts and comments that are really snarky towards FDS principles and women who actually want to date.

No one is forcing them to be here, yet they still make nasty comments. Such LV energy.

iacint · 2021-10-03T13:06:31+00:00

We already have fds level up, ask fds and superfans , what else they want?

mcSnappleteet · 2021-10-03T22:43:06+00:00

I am so thankful for finding this sub. Every time I feel myself slipping backwards on the progress I've made with relationships and dating, I come here and read. I have recommended this sub to a friend who desperately needs a starting place. I am so thankful this space exists

FlockAroundtheClock · 2021-10-04T02:21:07+00:00

Damn, why is this an issue every few months?

MissouriBlue · 2021-10-03T16:50:02+00:00

I’m here to relearn the strategies of coping with men - romantically, professionally, socially.

I want tips and techniques for further developing my Self. How best to grow into the best version with the potential I have.

If I wanted alternate advice or a steady fare of man-bashing, I can find that elsewhere.

I’m all for FDS remaining FDS. Its why I am here.

Specific-Composer300 · 2021-10-03T11:28:39+00:00

Thank you! Sometimes the posts are too overly negative and encourage women to not date men, never get married etc...uh, this is a sub about DATING, not a femcel/WGTOW sub.

TrixieFriganza · 2021-10-03T09:48:24+00:00

FDS has become such a known name (almost like a brand name) that it would b a shame to chance it. Even if I find the dating advice very important I'm personally not at all interested in dating att the moment so it would a huge shame imo of only posts about dating would be allowed as I'm usually more interested in the other posts as I don't care for finding a man (lol actually this sub has made me sure that I probably never want to have a man or even date), these past couple of months as I have been here it has literally been life chancing for me, even if Iknow it's about dating I have always seen it as more a different kind of eye opening feminist sub. I still think the dating advice here is extremely important and probably even life saving so I wish it could be about both. But I don't know if I'm the minority o or majority who wants that and obviously I'm not the decision maker, owner or voice of this sub and you decide and I'łl respect it, or if you find a better name.

I'm just telling what I feel and how extremely important and chancing this sub has been for me even as someone not interested in dating, I think lot of us and women burned from dating have needed a space too and honestly I don't know where we would go, specially as lot of the feminist subs om reddit sound crap, infiltrated by pick-mes and scrotes. This sub seems to be the only one that has taught women to actually chance and level up. I'm sure I have still long way to go and lot to learn, like I have made so much excuses for men and let them step over me. It's hard to learn over specially as my mother let my dad make all decisions and yell at her like to a child when I was growing up, he taught me too that men are better and smarter and a womans place is with the children and cooking, cleaning and taking care of the house. Almost like a maid or even a slave how she was treated during her life now that I think about it it makes me really sad (and my parents come from a nordic country with generally the most modern, femist values). I'm happy see young women not accepting treatment like that bit still lot to do as it takes time to chance a midset and why subs like this are important.

Of course it's your sub and you decide what you want it to be about and who or what subjects to ban, I know having a sub is extremely hard work.

aluriaphin · 2021-10-03T15:46:07+00:00

Responded to someone about this yesterday, it's the Female DATING Strategy ffs. The Level Up sub exists if you don't want dating related content but we're not about to take the D out of FDS 😏😏😏

SleeplessError · 2021-10-03T10:56:48+00:00

teaching women how to date is noble work and the best way to help us improve our lives. Most women aare the product of cultures that force us to be pliant and accepting of men's flaws, lest we be regarded as mean. This is a bomb placed in our brains since birth. It's bad.
People who fail to understand that... maybe they need to look somewhere else

oliveial4185 · 2021-10-03T23:01:02+00:00

Thanks for continuing to remind members of this. I agree with the motto that it is better to stay single than in a bad relationship. I just get so frustrated when I see WGTOW comments/posts. (I report some of the more extreme posts- acknowledging the scope of the subreddit.) This is a dating strategy. This is not the place for women who are "no longer interested in dating men ever again."

edit: spelling

JadeBaby2211 · 2021-10-03T19:47:20+00:00

Honestly dissecting the patriarchy through the lens of dating has been incredibly helpful for me. Once I woke up to the games played by men in dating, the whole house of cards came tumbling down and im so thankful.

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