Sad, unfortunate truths about the “friend zone”

Bbqchilifries · 2021-11-09T20:41:50+00:00

And then you fall asleep while watching a movie in his dorm and he ends up feeling you up to check out and then idéalise your "mound" for the next 5 years (fupa area really).

top_of_the_stairs · 2021-11-09T18:33:41+00:00

I don't friendzone any guys, ever. I cut them loose quick - not quite a full block & delete, in case we share mutual friends/colleagues... more like bare minimum courteous contact. Acquaintance-zone, so to speak 😂 I learned long ago that guys who "settle" for friendship are rarely a true friend; they're more like vultures patiently circling your love life, seeking whatever scraps they can get.

s0meg1rl · 2021-11-10T01:12:11+00:00

I’ve had men I considered genuine platonic friends drop off the face of the earth once I got married, and I’ve had men I considered platonic friends drop off once *they got married as well. The whole phenomenon seems so tacky and unnecessary. I believe that on our part, we can truly be ‘just friends’ with a guy, but for them…all they do is think with their penis, it’s so frustrating & immature, I don’t think they’re capable of friendship with us. Sometimes they’re orbiting, even when we’ve given 0 indicators that we would want something to develop, and in that case they’re just biding their time & hoping something may happen someday. I mean how disingenuous can you be...they’re essentially just pretending to be our friend due to the .00005% chance that there could be sex someday. Once either party is locked down, they don’t even pretend anymore, they just ghost. It’s pathetic. And it’s hurtful too.

herbivorouscarnivore · 2021-11-09T18:02:52+00:00

This is another for the files of Men Need to Accept No as an Answer.

1 You are not entitled to any woman’s affection, except perhaps your actual mother.

Fighting “the friend zone” reinforces that the thought process in the tweet is correct.
Only L/NVM think friendship is a waste.

ashesofgrey · 2021-11-10T00:33:09+00:00

Today I saw a text on how a guy was planning to rape the girl just in case if she didn't agree to go with him on a date. He seemed like a nice guy. Men...you never know what they're hiding

Ericaeatscarrots · 2021-11-09T21:39:24+00:00

The nice for what zone

Acrobatic-March-9763 · 2021-11-09T18:49:03+00:00

The fact that this phrase exists is proof men have no interest in women besides using our bodies as a flesh light.

woadsky · 2021-11-10T01:58:01+00:00

I once met the mother of a young woman who was killed. She was in a romantic relationship, and also became friendly with another man. He was from another country possibly where women don't have many rights and are treated aggressively.

Well, she was getting vibes that he wanted to be more than friends and from what I understand she reiterated (with her boyfriend present) that she wanted to keep it friends only. The guy killed her. I am guessing that it was a violent response to feeling humiliated. Please be careful out there. I think there is a place for "being nice" so that the rejectee doesn't feel humiliated. The difference in cultures was a factor I believe. This poor woman and her poor mother.

scorchedsouI · 2021-11-09T22:49:06+00:00

I don't care if it's dangerous, I refuse to do this. If someone makes me think that violent retaliation to rejection is a possibility I'm not being nice to them, I cease to have any interactions with them whatsoever.

Cutting off, blocking, deleting, ignoring, avoiding, grey-rocking. I've done it before and I'll do it again. Idgaf, I'm not walking on eggshells around some scrote.

sexyonpaper · 2021-11-10T02:08:09+00:00

The very fact that the phrase exists screams male entitlement.

Like idk, even if we eventually shtup, shouldn't we want to spent time together for reasons other than that?

Maybe I'm old but maybe Biz Markie might've gotten lost in translation? All my longest lasting relationships (sure, they ended, but still) started with friendship.

The important bit is the "friend" part... right? Anyone who's fixated on the "zone" of it should already know to stay in their "lane."

I may have missed the point of this post but I (think I) still agree. I've always felt like "friend-zone" was a thing dudes did to themselves when they decided they'd already tried nothing and ran out of ideas.

The phrase FWB has a similar icky connotation for me. Like, why are we dragging friendship through the mud in the name of cis-het male entitlement?

NB: I do agree with others in the comments re: friendship. Any male "friend" of mine is just waiting (for the perfect moment to kvetch about having been friendzoned). My true male friends? They also fancy men. Thank goodness for the gays, because there's no such relationship as "friendship" between a straight woman and a straight man.

notHISmailorderbride · 2021-11-09T18:12:11+00:00

That doesn’t even stop them from committing said crimes.

san__404 · 2021-11-09T18:11:50+00:00

For real. How much that pisses them off though.

MorthaP · 2021-11-09T21:11:25+00:00

It's also often the 'this man is being kinda weird I think he's into me not sure I better don't say anything and just act desinterested and hope he eventually gets the hint' zone

Jay-Qualin · 2021-11-09T19:40:20+00:00

I never feel sorry for these losers who complain about being friendzoned...it's not like they were seeking a real bonding or a relationship with the woman, they are just sad that they couldn't FUCK her aka fuckzone her ...and lets not forget how these ugly/broke losers seek women out of their league, which is why they get friend zoned to begin with. Ugly mfers wanna cry about being friendzoned well boo fucking hoo cry me a river...women get used for sex, get humped & dumped, get treated like objects by Hoe-boys ...its not close enough to what women have to go through or deal with, so stfu about your ugly ass getting friendzoned cause I don't care

LittleSnackPack58 · 2021-11-10T02:05:41+00:00

My female friends are so much better, kinder, empathetic, and smarter. Why would I want to subject myself to a dumb fuck that doesn't respect my boundaries or my marriage? I will never have male friends again. They ruin it every time.

MagickalChilde19 · 2021-11-09T19:02:08+00:00

Sad, but true.

Colour_riot · 2021-11-11T17:07:11+00:00

oof too true. Men actually know this too "some day that one's going to snap and I don't want it to be me", shame they can't apply it to themselves more often

Japanese-Spaghetti · 2021-11-20T23:53:03+00:00

Yep I had a stalker a few years ago and this was exactly the situation. He kept escalating until I finally called the police

ConstantNurse · 2021-11-10T07:07:43+00:00

I have plenty of HVM guy friends that legitimately only friends. They are amazing in their own right and I am glad to have them in my life. I would also hardcore wingwoman for them if they did find someone they were interested in. The friendships are strictly platonic and were pivotal in my own recovery from being in an 11 year DV relationship.

There are also guys who have "presented" as a friend but started pushing boundaries of what was acceptable in a friendship. The main boundary being consent. For example, I mentioned to the "friendzoned friend" that I was craving donuts but that I was not near anywhere to get some during an evening text. The next day, he brought a box of a dozen donuts unprompted to our shared work place. A work place that I didn't start until three hours after him, which meant the donuts had been sitting for a good while. He gifted me the box of them and then I had to figure out WTF I was going to do with 12 treats while having to go to class an hour later in the day. I also have a weirdly sensitive stomach and I often can only eat half a donut before I feel like I am going to get sick. I ended up not eating any of them and having to give them all away (Which he got mad at me for).

On the other hand, my HVM friends would have asked if I wanted them to pick up something that they knew I would enjoy but usually if they were stopping by the place themselves anyway.

AlegalHuman · 2021-11-10T15:34:21+00:00

LMAO

Title	Sad, unfortunate truths about the “friend zone”
Author	herbivorouscarnivore
Upvotes	2853
Comments	40
Date	November 9, 2021 5:56 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/qq9abj/sad_unfortunate_truths_about_the_friend_zone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/sad-unfortunate-truths-about-the-friend-zone.1085025 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085025