You might think these are empty/meaningless cliches at first, but these are actually red flags that scrotes will openly tell you about. I tried to come up with an informal list. While the list is a bit tongue'n'cheek, you'd be surprised how accurate some of these are... After reading these translations, you will never look at an OLD bio the same way again...

NOT AN EXHAUSTIVE LIST. Please add your own favorite zingers in the comments. Let's put on our collective " critical thinking hats" and document our experiences to help each other identify scrotes and fine-tune our BS meters.

  • sarcasm/wit/salty = passive aggressive & endless negging
  • dark humor/ love horror = full of depravity and lack respect for life
  • be funny/ i'm funny = i expect you to laugh at my jokes
  • be interesting = I can’t lead or maintain a conversation, so I expect you to do instead
  • fun-loving = a fair weather " friend" only. As soon as things get tough I'mma gonna bail
  • have a sense of humor = put up with my BS
  • ride or die = he's an abuser
  • be positive = i expect you to entertain me and be happy with me even when I'm being a scum
  • Just ask/ ask me anything = i'm not putting any effort into relationships. you will have to do all the work
  • tell you later = so embarrasing that will never tell, becomes very defensive if asked
  • no bad vibes/ no negativity/no drama/no baggage/please be normal =if you have a hard day & troubles, I don't want to hear about it. 0 empathy & emotional support
  • drama free/stress free = I'm not ready for the emotional work that is required for a real & meaningful relationship
  • laid-back/ low-stress/ easy going/ chill/ go with the flow = super low-effort: I never make plans and only have last minute, walk & coffee dates. The fanciest place I'll take you is a pub/dive bar/pizza place
  • spontaneous = I’ll book mark you for last minute date requests and booty calls
  • homebody = I hang out gaming at home in the underwear all day long. Only want Netflix & chill
  • not looking for anything serious = afraid of commitment & only looking for hookups
  • see where it leads/looking to see what happens= looking for how much I can extract from a woman/ how much I can get away with before she dumps me
  • hit the gym/ love to work out = greasy gym rat/ on 'roids , don't have any hobbies
  • seeking a muse = i will appropriate/plagiarize all your work and creativity and pass it as my own. let me mooch off your female creativity. I like to oogle naked women and pretend its "art"
  • have my own place = i meet the minimum requirements of financial independence, and use it to get laid. Looking for a financially insecure woman who still lives with roommates to manipulate
  • open minded = I'm into all kinds of deplorable kink
  • nice guy/kind = I do the bare minimum of not physically abusing women
  • healthy lifestyle = will body shame you and criticize what you eat
  • humble = got no accomplishments to speak of, lives in a hovel
  • confident = sociopathic jackass, who thinks he can get away with murder
  • realist = will complain if , thinks romance and holidays are consumerist, and will never do anytihing nice without a subtext. treats women like sex vending machines.
  • brutally/radically honest / no filter/direct/straightforward/blunt = controlling, verbally abusive, can become physically abusive when " irate" Doesn't care who he hurts.
  • not afraid of speaking my mind = same as above + racist homophobe + obnoxiously loud + total disregard of the opions of others
  • progressive/woke/socialist/ feminist/vegan = expects 50/50
  • Love strong independent woman, who doesn’t need a man but would appreciate one = want a woman i can mooch off financially while providng 0 value
  • Looking for a Queen/ woman of substance = same as above
  • "" Woman who knows how to have fun but can still hold down a job = same as above
  • Looking for someone strong-willed and ambitious = same as above + dominatrix for me
  • communist = same as above
  • bored = IQ of an amoeba
  • simple man = incompetent Neanderthal
  • just your average man = same as above
  • not very good at this = same as above
  • unicorn = looking for a thruple
  • tell you later = embarrassing job or thinks women are gold diggers, stingy
  • very hard worker = do the bare minimum to financially keep a roof over my head
  • work hard, play hard = I'm a borderline alcoholic and/or drug addict. blow all the money I earn. Have not saved a dime
  • go to museums = i've been to a museum during a school field trip. Will take you to a museum when they have a free public day, instead of a dinner date
  • took a wrong turn = convicted felon
  • practical = thinks holidays and romance were invented by advertising companies. Stingy and will never do anything romantic. Treats women like sex vending machines.
  • love cooking = will try to trick you to come to my house for dinner, so I don;t have to pay for dinner and have an opportunity to have sex with you. real cooking skills questionable at best.
  • Foodie = I have no hobbies or interests beyond food and sex
  • Don’t judge = I know I’m a lying, cheating & immoral POS
  • Travel & dining (cars & boats) lover = I am a brainless consumer. I have no internal life and treat women as consumable arm candy to show off as a status symbol. Only cares about respect of other men. Is hung up on one-ups-manship.
  • Specifically lists location in profile = low-effort, lazy and not willing to travel. Will ask for women to come see him instead.
  • Looking for an amazing connection/ chemistry = expect 1st date sex
  • See if we " click" = same as above
  • Don’t take life too seriously = I don’t have my shit together.
  • Be real/ be honest = only want a Pickme with no boundaries I can easily lie to and manipulate, has anger issues
  • No games = I expect easy pussy and want for women to do the chasing, anger and self-control issues
  • Looking for someone to spend time with/ travel buddy = I’m socially inept/ pathetic and lonely b/c I have no friends
  • " partner in crime = same as above
  • " emergency contact = same as above
  • " smeone to help me = same as above
  • " my future wife = No, only a forever-girlfriend who will put up w/ his BS
  • Perfectly imperfect = not willing to work on my weaknesses and improve myself
  • I am who I am = same as above, only dumber
  • World traveler = sex tourist
  • Curious = curious how much BS he can get away with
  • Love IPA = I’m a basic hipster with terrible job prospects
  • Down to earth = 0 personality and poor, lives in a hovel
  • Easy/Simple ( anything mentioning it) = 0 effort, 0 commitment, 100% flake
  • Optimist/ glass -half full = Can’t handle difficult situations, can’t handle conflict
  • Want to be around positive people = I’m an energy vampire and I can’t sustain myself without mooching energy off others
  • Stolen quote = 0 creativity
  • My mother thinks I’m handsome = 100% whiny mama’s boy
  • Rough around the edges = 0 social skills and not house-broken, live in my own filth
  • but clean up nice = have one ill-fitting suit that hasn;t seen dry cleaning in ages. last worn for a wedding 5 years ago
  • housebroken = barely, expects treats for putting laundry in the hamper and not pissing on the floor
  • Bad at writing bios = 0 self-awareness
  • Love good grammar = annoyingly pedantic and will correct your English at every turn, to make himself feel superior
  • European = from eastern Europe, and have misogynistic “family values” Possibly connected to the mob ( but not necessarily)
  • Respectful = I’m going to gaslight and be paternalizing & dismissive
  • looking to spoil = sugar daddy arrangement b/c its cheaper than escorts and more manipulative
  • Maverick = asshole who thinks he’s above society’s rules and regulations
  • Be gentle = I’m a coward who’s an expert gaslighter and my male ego is very fragile
  • Looking for my missing/better half = I have no life skills and can’t survive on my own. I need someone to take care of me
  • Trying to figure this out = I have no clue how to succeed at life
  • Don’t take yourself too seriously = misogynistic gaslighter with chronic disregard for boundaries
  • Just along for the ride = I want you to invent the relationship, so I can mooch off you, will just be a prop till he bails
  • Whatever happens, happens = I take 0 responsibility
  • No Regrets = same as above + extremely reckless
  • Extroverted/ high energy = I’m going to endlessly push you to do things you don’t want to do
  • Nomad = commitment phobic and gets run out-of-town for his bad behavior frequently
  • Love to learn = will steal all of your know-how and best ideas
  • Outgoing = I go out to nightclubs every night of the week
  • Renaissance man = attention span of an ADHD squirrel, who can’t stick with something long enough to establish mastery, a dilettante
  • Female ( any reference to women using this word) = does not view women as human beings, only as a sex object
  • Keep it real = I’m a disgusting, rude animal and don’t know how to be a civilized human being
  • Living my best life = I have no regard for the feelings and needs of others. I’m super self-centered and selfish
  • Living the dream = I already peaked, and am resting on my laurels , its only going downhill from here on out, as I'm not looking to self-improve
  • Cool, calm & relaxed = emotional availability of a piece of cardboard
  • Enjoying everything life has to offer = unfaithful womanizer, always want the “new” girl
  • Well-read = read all of the Harry Potter or LOTR books
  • Take a chance on me = every other girlfriend has dumped me quick
  • Educated = I barely graduated from college after 6 years
  • Old fashioned = old-school misogynist, looking for ignorant ( unliberated) trad-woman pick-me
  • Family -oriented = same as above, looking for a bangmaid, where I can do 0 household chores
  • God-fearing = same as above
  • Looking for a nice girl = similar as above, a pick-me who doesn't have the confidence to call him out on his BS
  • Always up for a good time = compulsive booty-caller
  • Love movies= couch potato, no hobbies
  • Never say never = I don’t care about your boundaries, I’mma still gonna push kink on you
  • Do things that scare you/ get out of your comfort zone = same as above
  • Adventurous = same as above
  • Executive = paper-pushing middle manager who makes the life of his employees miserable ( and yours too), overinflated ego and he will never make it to the C-suite as a real " decision-maker"
  • Mature = I’m far too old of a creeper for the women I try pursue, but I still act like a tantrum-throwing child
  • Professional = pointless & boring 9-5 corporate job, where I sit at a desk all day moving papers around
  • Hustler = thief/criminal/fraudster
  • I’ll buy you French fries/ let you eat mine = I will never take you to a fine dining establishment
  • Anything ending w/ “ Saurus” - stuck at the emotional development level of a 5 year old
  • Will give massages = I will touch you and invade your physical boundaries whether you like it or not
  • Need animal co-parent = Can’t even handle being responsible for an animal
  • Just seeing what’s out there = I’m trying to hook up with as many women as possible
  • Hit me up = I’m so lazy, I can’t be bothered to ask a girl out
  • Craft beer connoisseur = I’m an out-of shape, flannel wearing, neck beard spotting, balding “Viking” who wears his pants too tight and lives in parents basement or with roomates
  • High EQ = master manipulator
  • Good guy looking for a good girl = barely average, just your stereotypical basic scrote, looking for someone out of his league
  • Pam to my Jim - same as above
  • Meet amazing/ interesting people = I’m a social climber/ social snob, and unless you are in the “in” crowd of superficial people with fancy, well-paid jobs and from wealthy family/ bicoastal elites, don’t bother
  • Devil or Angel/ Good Girl or Bad Girl = I’m into all kinds of deplorable kink, definitely porn sick serious Madonna/whore complex
  • Quiet/Shy/private/ low-key = definite cheater, porn addict and potentially a depraved serial killer
  • My family and friends mean everything = I have no mind of my own, I bow to the opinions and judgements of others. i will never stand up for you
  • Medical professional = hospital orderly
  • Law professional = paralegal
  • former attorney = disbarred
  • Former banker = fired/ couldn’t cut it / burned out
  • On leave/ on sabbatical/ taking a break = unemployed
  • goal oriented = my only goal is to get in your pants
  • Always aim to improve/ better myself = at your expense ( he’s a moocher)