This has been trending on twitter a bit and I just wanted to know what you guys think about this

allthedates2018 · 2019-12-31T01:37:10+00:00

Chiming in with another story of terrible "boyfriends" who actually do this. I went into anaphylactic shock due to something, still don't know what to this day, and my boyfriend at the time drove me to the ER but dropped me off at the door. He had to go to the gym to meet some people you see. I was in the middle of losing my ability to breathe and had zero interest in managing his feelings about the situation so I told to him to go if he wanted.

Sad to say I stayed with him after. I don't think it was that I didn't have enough self-respect to dump him, rather my naiveté had such depths that I thought if I did all the wife shit for him he would show up to his side of things. Because that's what people do right? They care about each other? No. Lots of people just don't give a shit about other people. I dumped him eventually though, thank God. Haven't dated anyone since and I'm super happy with my life now.

572987450193840981 · 2019-12-30T22:32:07+00:00

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kimikupkake · 2019-12-30T23:07:48+00:00

I was in the hospital ER with a kidney stone, from 3am to 3pm by myself. Parents were at court with my brother. Told my (male) boss and he offered to come and wait with me so I wasn't alone. Bf at the time (the crier) used the self pity "sorry I can't be there, no ride wahwah" and I spent some time making him feel better. Ugh I cringe at my former self

nopethrowaway_headph · 2019-12-30T23:45:15+00:00

My ex bf went to the doctor with me when I found a breast lump. We weren't even dating anymore, but I didn't know anyone else in the area I felt comfortable confiding in, and I was scared. If someone who broke up with me was there for me, I would hope someone I am dating would be there for me. (Ex didn't do this to get me back, he was just a good guy.)

Imstillwatchingyou · 2019-12-31T00:48:47+00:00

I once had terrible chest pains in the middle of the night for no known reason and I was really freaked out. I asked my boyfriend next to me to takes me to the hospital, he refused because he wanted to sleep. I had to beg him to help me.

eat-reddit-tv · 2019-12-31T02:40:14+00:00

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vaname · 2019-12-31T00:52:21+00:00

My ex didn’t even TRY to ask for the day off to come to my BRAIN SURGERY. Why the hell I stayed beyond that is still a mystery to me.

After we broke up, he ended up killing my dog when he drove drunk and attempted suicide, also killing someone else instead.

I think I’m just destined to be single forever. It’s just not worth the headache.

Ms_Tilly · 2019-12-31T03:23:19+00:00

I had to legit force my (ex) husband to take my 7 months pregnant ass to the ER on my birthday. I felt I was going into preterm labor. I woke him up and told him and he didn't want to because it was early and it was his day off. He took me because I would've started fucking losing it, but he whines the whole time and I will never forget that. And I was 100% going into labor. Had to get the steroid shots and be hospitalized and then put on bedrest. Twice weekly dr appts to check my cervix and I eventually needed another hospitalization and a pessary. My kid is 9. I'm still salty.

Maisiebr · 2019-12-31T05:19:25+00:00

[deleted]

Sewud · 2019-12-30T23:57:22+00:00

I broke my face, went to the emergency room, went home because I was told to go to a hospital with a better scanner the next day, went in the next day, was reeled into emergency surgery, spent the next day in hospital, went home, spent a week convalescing at home, boyfriend was not heard of for this entire time!

To think that when he broke his face a year prior I was there with him in the emergency room. Yes, we both broke our faces, him being a drunk idiot, me getting hit in the face by a tall man while playing a non-contact sport.

curlygirl507 · 2019-12-30T23:40:55+00:00

This is an incredibly low standard. I'm pretty sure that any one of my exes, all of whom I dumped, would rescue me in an emergency. Definitely the two who are local. My male friends, colleagues, and my friends' husbands would, too.

I'm deeply disturbed by many of the stories I read on this sub. The situation with women having low self-esteem is so much worse than I ever thought possible.

raindampened · 2019-12-30T22:31:25+00:00

totally agree with it.

when I had to spend a week and half in the hospital bc I had a bad reaction to an antibiotic (it wasn't an emergency, they just wanted to monitor my health and do a few tests) my boyfriend didn't come in, not even for an afternoon.

okay he lived in another city than me, which was 1,5 hour away with train and he had a strict schedule with his job. but still. we had been together for about 2 years at that point. couldn't he take out 1 sick day to visit me? while in our relationship I was the one who ALWAYS travelled to his place even when I WAS SICK and had a fever???

ugh okay I will calm down. I won't let his LVM qualities and my past PickMeisha qualities work me up.

anyway. I get it, work and blablabla. but I was supposed to be someone who he planned to marry. he discussed plans with me to own a house and have a family. and yet he couldn't visit me...?

nah, sis.

yeontanw · 2019-12-30T23:22:57+00:00

The actual, yeah.

The former? Maybe if he saw the message after his 12 hour game play.

s_slayer · 2019-12-31T05:37:00+00:00

My ex didn’t seem to care much when I texted him that I was in the ER. His typical male response? “Oh shit!”...followed by ...nothing. This is what we’re dealing with, ladies. They are not worth it and they show you so EARLY ON. Don’t be stupid like I was and give him “the benefit of the doubt” or “maybe he’ll change”. Really? That’s how low your standards are? At the very least, learn to be happy alone cause they don’t change. Sorry. Decades of relationships has taught me that. I’m here to hopefully save a few women from believing this myth. I might just be an expert on men at this point tbh. This same guy is trying to manipulate me now, and it’s really hard to care at this point you know? When you realize the man you thought loved you brushed off your darkest moments, then comes back some day and tries to fuck with your vulnerability ... just hell no. Send him to hell. In my case if he wants to off himself so be it. He didn’t give a damn why I was in the ER or the outcome. They pretend to care when their guilt level is high and/ or they’re trying to win you back (a lot of times to prove stuff to family/friends). It’s terrible. We are literally dealing with soulless beings.

ThinkTofu · 2019-12-31T05:32:55+00:00

My town literally burned to the ground while the dude I was seeing was out of town.

I called his family to make sure that they were ok. Then I called him crying and left a voicemail telling him my neighborhood was on fire and I was terrified.

He completely ignored it, then gaslighted me.

The next time I heard from him was nearly a month later at 10pm asking me to come to his house. He'd been home for 2 weeks already.

sockpuppet747 · 2019-12-31T01:25:30+00:00

Wow. Luckily looking at my past I have had medical emergencies in my past, and my boyfriends at those specific times did show up with help.

With both of them, however, there are reasons we didn’t make it.

Sadly, this user’s account has been suspended on Twitter.

elemenelope · 2019-12-30T23:22:22+00:00

I think each of my close friends, male or female, would drop everything to help me. This should be a given in all friendships/relationships, in my opinion.

On the flip side: you need to also be the kind of girlfriend/friend who would do the same.

1helloworld · 2019-12-31T01:50:11+00:00

My ex-bf was there for my family members as well. He visited my sick uncle in the hospital after a stroke, offered meals, etc. They have to be part of your village to be part of your life.

thowawaywookie · 2019-12-31T10:08:33+00:00

Found out the hard way on this.

1st husband was there for me. You could count on him. Sadly he passed away.

2nd husband was a selfish pos. I ended up in the hospital with sepsis and stayed a week and that lazy ass couldn't be bothered to come see me or even bother to bring my personal items.

ThinkTofu · 2019-12-31T12:05:10+00:00

I saw this post. I have slipped disk and currently bed-ridden due to back pain. I asked my bf to WFH today. He said he had an important meeting in the morning, but will come home post lunch. He showed up at 5 in the evening. Thinking about this, he has most of the times, not been there for me when I am unwell. Once, he put me in a cab to home instead of accompanying me when I was about to faint. I have broken up with him. I am writing this through tears, but it is better to leave this toxicity out of my life in 2019. May you all get a man who deserves you!

feasantly_plucked · 2019-12-31T03:12:16+00:00

the thing is, you never know. You get a gut instinct about who will come through for ya and why, and how, but it never happens the way you think... People can still surprise you, and no amount of rules can predict what people do in an emergency.

I say that as someone who's experienced a sadly large spectrum of emergencies, both hers and others', both physical and emotional. If you're in need, dial and see.... just, don't hold your breath because that's the call that's gonna separate the wasters from the keepers. Every time.

edit: this goes for friends & family, as well as dates!

dboo27 · 2019-12-31T06:02:50+00:00

I think it's important to stay empowered by only allowing good people inside us. Inside our hearts and minds and literally inside us.

extraacct1234 · 2019-12-31T15:09:48+00:00

Some angry lurking LVM really tried to report this post as "threatening violence or harm". I think he needs some burn cream!

Alybank · 2019-12-31T16:03:41+00:00

I remember I was stranded in an unfamiliar part of town, with no car, and no way to get to the rental car place. I called and texted the guy is was dating at the time, and even though he was texting me 5 minutes before that, he went MIA. And didn’t respond to my need for help. I’m so glad that made me break things off with him. Cause these stories are just sad. I sometimes will complain to my friends I’m still single, but damn I’d rather be single than deal with that.

LibraQueen39 · 2019-12-30T23:53:09+00:00

Nope I said how I felt after 6 years and cut him off because I cannot handle 6 more years of bullshit I'm hungry now but I haven't called him for anything praying my bills be covered in Jesus name but I will not continue this shit on My Momma I'm too good of a woman!

BasieSkanks · 2019-12-31T18:44:21+00:00

I was actually thinking about this today. It’s weird how I mistook having sex with someone for a long period of time for real intimacy. It then dawned on me that my ex-FWB was never really my friend. I always felt like I was bothering him. When I went through an abortion alone, the most he could do was text and occasionally video call. He didn’t even show up for what was a dangerous and emotionally and physically invasive procedure - a situation he helped create.

2019-12-31T04:39:08+00:00

Totally agree. If I can't put him down as an emergency contact, there's no point.

CuriousCatNYC777 · 2019-12-31T14:10:11+00:00

Yikes these posts are DEVASTATING. Women are way too nice.

Loiacono3137 · 2019-12-31T14:51:16+00:00

It’s true!!

Mine would ❤️

1000nipples · 2019-12-30T23:11:17+00:00

Idk, if you're just friends with benefits and only fucking around, do you really need to throw them away?

Ms_Tilly · 2019-12-31T03:17:20+00:00

I love that last line😂

SrUnOwEtO · 2019-12-31T07:19:03+00:00

I'd apply this to friends even. But absolutely

Halofriend101 · 2019-12-31T13:00:53+00:00

yes, I agree. Even if you don't have feelings for the man you're sleeping with, he should have respect and care for you.

radioheadcreep · 2019-12-31T03:09:23+00:00

I’m feeling this.

bastmtl · 2019-12-31T05:18:51+00:00

Oof. This makes me think of all the times I dropped everything to take care of my ex-gf whenever she was sick or ended up in the hospital. But when I was so sick I almost died she couldn't be bothered to come over.

size_queen10 · 2019-12-31T10:54:00+00:00

I took myself to the ad while pregnant, cause I thought I was leaking amniotic fluid. Exhusband didnt bother to come. Hence he's an ex.

katmomofeve · 2019-12-31T15:53:10+00:00

Nope! He will complain that I am not able to take care of the kids.

Juggernaut7654 · 2019-12-31T13:44:14+00:00

Depends if it's just casual or a proper significant other that you care for.

You should always come through for your significant other if you can, and you should be able to rely on your SO doing the same. But if the relationship is just casual and ya'll having fun then neither of you should be expected to go the extra mile for each other until you're both ready to make things serious.

Title	This has been trending on twitter a bit and I just wanted to know what you guys think about this
Author	fluffydumpling_
Upvotes	1727
Comments	120
Date	December 30, 2019 10:18 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/eht5n1/this_has_been_trending_on_twitter_a_bit_and_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/this-has-been-trending-on-twitter-a-bit-and-i-just.685916 https://theredarchive.com/post/685916

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