CMV: On Reddit, posts asking for emotional support get significantly more replies when they appear to be from women than from men

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2026-07-09T18:34:19+00:00

This post has been removed for not clearly highlighting how it’s related to or impacts heterosexual dating dynamics.

half_avocado33 · 2026-07-09T15:37:40+00:00

First of all, you do seem to compare apples and oranges. If i see a post "i need a friend" , i might read, maybe even comment.

If i see a post "let's talk about books", i get past it, don't even click on the post because i'm not into that.

It also depends on which sub it was posted, how it's integrated into the sub's peofile, what is the sub's demographic and at which hours there's more activity.

"I'm lonely" posted in a soccer sub might draw attention and fans from the same club as the OP might invite them in their group for the next game

"Wanna talk about books" in the same sub will be mostly downvoted, maybe even removed by mods as it's irrelevant for the sub.

Talking_Tanuki · 2026-07-09T15:40:04+00:00

There are more male users, and they’re more eager to reach out to women. Female users are more willing to reach out to other women too, so posts from women get more engagement from both genders as a result.

Icy_Ad_4544 · 2026-07-09T15:36:53+00:00

If someone is asking to discuss books why would we assume they are lonely and are looking for support? Maybe no one wanted to talk about books at that time. 🤷‍♀️

lesliecarbone · 2026-07-09T15:41:43+00:00

INFO: Is it your understanding of things that men seeking interlocutors to "discuss literature/books" are really "asking for emotional support"?

pie-mart · 2026-07-09T15:31:40+00:00

And 99% of the time its from men looking to hookup or get nudes

Equivalent_Dance2278 · 2026-07-09T15:56:08+00:00

How do you know either of those posts are from men or women? Why is talking about books equal to needing support? How do you know book person didn’t get loads of dms?

Seems the person with gender bias is you.

ChadChasingBReturns · 2026-07-09T15:39:45+00:00

Your example is not someone asking for emotional support. It’s someone looking to discuss literature. Those aren’t in the same field of discussion.

Plenty-Practice-6399 · 2026-07-09T15:53:09+00:00

Discussing books is not the same as needing friends. Men get way more support and attention in multiple spaces.

Lenovo_Driver · 2026-07-09T15:50:50+00:00

If you want to go discuss books go to r/books ?

Solondthewookiee · 2026-07-09T15:52:11+00:00

Women get support largely from other women.

Men largely do not support other men.

Be the change you want to see. r/GuyCry is full of guys who need support.

Demasii · 2026-07-09T15:51:03+00:00

Everyone understands the emotion of being lonely.

Some people can't read so they can't talk about books.

KayRay1994 · 2026-07-09T15:53:50+00:00

Sure, you’re not wrong. Posts that ask for support that appear like they’re from women do get more attention - That’s cause women support each other more and men put on a face of support as an attempt to get laid or get close to a woman who appears vulnerable

That being said, I’m also not sure how the examples you gave read as ‘posts made by women/men’ - they just read as posts that anyone could make. They don’t feel gendered at all

Unique-Afternoon6316 · 2026-07-09T16:03:08+00:00

I agree with the title but this was a terrible way to display your argument. Your example 2 has nothing to do with emotional support.

Anyway- there are subreddits focused on male support if you're interested. A general chatting subreddit probably isn't the best place for a man to receive support.

Hungry-Plantain-3315 · 2026-07-09T16:08:30+00:00

Are you being serious?

Asking Reddit if they want to discuss books is not asking for “emotional support.”

This post is so disingenuous.

Edit: I hope men see this and understand this is why some people don’t take men’s grievance seriously. It’s dishonest to claim men don’t get emotional support when in reality it turns out you’re just talking about books.

OffTheRedSand · 2026-07-09T16:17:31+00:00

who's to blame for this tho? women support other women, men simp for women sometimes in hopes of getting something back, which is a disingenuous support.

it's not women's fault men don't support each other or don't care about each other's struggles.

and it's not on women to support men especially online since men usually make it weird after women support them.

if men are looking for support and attention especially online, they need to learn to give it to one another.

sublimemongrel · 2026-07-09T16:25:27+00:00

Example 2 is not really akin to example 1, which is clearly more explicitly seeking emotional support than example 2.

Also though I have not seen these posts, what sub were they posted on? This one? Don’t you think the specific subreddits you are apparently using to come to this conclusion are relevant?

Siukslinis_acc · 2026-07-09T16:38:22+00:00

Apparently there is a crysis of book reading, so it is no wonder that many don't want to discuss books. Also,I tend to read for fun and immerse myself in the book, so I'm not good at discussing a book.

Also, what are the genders of example 1 and 2? The post titles seem gender neutral.

Barneysparky · 2026-07-09T15:37:26+00:00

Do you know how disturbing it would be to have a major negative life event happen, ask for support and end up getting asked to send nudes and sent dick pics?

No, you dont.

Training-Cook3507 · 2026-07-09T15:52:17+00:00

Women support women more than men support men. Additionally, Reddit is largely liberal and liberal spaces tend to mute sympathetic to women and judgmental of men.

ArtisticLime9769 · 2026-07-09T16:11:59+00:00

Half of them just want to get into DMs.

Fondacey · 2026-07-09T16:16:42+00:00

How do you isolate gender when the engagement questions are entirely different?

“I need help” vs “anyone for a literary discussion” is already wildly different asks.

YeaNobody · 2026-07-09T16:30:55+00:00

another post feigning ignorance of the fact plenty of guys confuse "support" with "please fuck me, kiss me, validate me as a man"....and I'm saying this as such a man lol. I wish there was an answer....I truly do but....you can't make people want other people.

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NiaMiaBia · 2026-07-09T15:49:52+00:00

Which subs are you referencing? Also, you realize that we can’t really tell if someone is a man, woman, or child right? Unless we’re in a gendered sub - how can we know? Especially when names are generic.

That said, I have seen what I assume are men getting tons of support on male-centered subs. About a year ago on the “Guy Cry” sub, there was a guy struggling with fatherhood (understandable) but he was going on about how he hated when his kid cried, that he just wants to leave, etc. I pointed out that he sounded a bit dangerous, and guess what? I got kicked off the sub because I wasn’t being supportive.

JollyBowler2510 · 2026-07-09T17:00:51+00:00

You’re comparing two different things, it’s not remotely the same.

Feeling_Ad_1034 · 2026-07-09T17:24:57+00:00

More men are on reddit, and men supporting women is wired into men's biological priorities because sex.

TheCounsellingGamer · 2026-07-09T18:31:23+00:00

In my experience, most Reddit users will think other users are men just as default. I'm not sure what the actual statistic of male vs female users is, but the stereotype that only men use Reddit is still alive and well.

Also, you really can't compare those two posts. One is directed to a broad audience, whereas the other is directed at a much narrower audience. A post where someone is saying "I want to talk to anyone" is going to get more responses than a post where someone says "I want to talk about this specific thing with people who also like this specific thing".

If I put a post saying I needed a friend, you might be inclined to reply because I haven't specified what kind of friend I'm looking for. If I said I was looking for a friend to discuss theatre with, you'd only reply if you were interested in theatre. If you weren't, you wouldn't bother. It would have nothing to do with my gender and everything to do with the fact that you're not interested in theatre.

Narrow-Broccoli531 · 2026-07-09T15:46:43+00:00

Stop caring about this bullshit

WingHuge2185 · 2026-07-09T16:38:36+00:00

For some reason horny, desperate men like to go on Reddit and complement women and gas them up. I have no idea why, maybe they're bored, maybe they're just lonely, maybe a few think they might actually have a chance with these women. But sexless men use this site as an outlet for parasocial "relationships" with women they don't know and will never meet. It's a fascinating phenomenon.

JollyBowler2510 · 2026-07-09T16:57:44+00:00

Because majority of the emotional issues men want help with, are lack of sex, or they can’t find a woman. And when you try to have sympathy for the not dating issues, they get pissed ofd and would rather blame women than fix it.

Title	CMV: On Reddit, posts asking for emotional support get significantly more replies when they appear to be from women than from men
Author	Muted_Television_784
Upvotes	1
Comments	54
Date	July 9, 2026 3:29 PM UTC (3 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1urtli6/cmv_on_reddit_posts_asking_for_emotional_support/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/cmv-on-reddit-posts-asking-for-emotional-support.1584635 https://theredarchive.com/post/1584635

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