Does this really work?

redpillschool · 2013-12-12T14:30:36+00:00

but I am scared of changing into one of those cocky assholes that I hate

Here's a question. Have you ever wondered why you hate these guys, and they get the girls?

What caused you to hate them? Was it people telling you "that's no way to be! It's not honorable!" Was it your mom? Was it your girlfriends? Was it movies and television?

Ask yourself why you're holding the idea that you should avoid at all costs being somebody who currently has shown he knows how to get women. When you really think about it... is it really hate? Did you come up with this hate? Or was it learned?

netgrey · 2013-12-12T15:40:14+00:00

I suggest reading No More Mr. Nice guy and then come back.

Pomskey · 2013-12-12T15:20:48+00:00

Time Ho http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9QOQNcpuiA

If you havent seen it yet. Its what you were to her.

_whistler · 2013-12-12T13:34:47+00:00

So you've been what we like to call a Beta Orbiter for this girl. That's how I got here, too. I went through the same thing. Brother, you've come to the right place.

The first thing you've got to do is read the material. I don't mean skim some articles and posts, I mean truly sink your teeth in. It took me months of reading 6+ hours a day before I felt I could actually live my Red Pill knowledge. You've got to be hungry, motivated, determined. And you've got to know that this is for you, to improve yourself, not just so some girl might finally get tingly over you.

Second thing, accept the fact that you're afraid. I've talked to quite a few folks who've come here, seemed like they understand what we're about and they want in, but they could never take the plunge and swallow the Red Pill all the way down. This is because of fear. Your sense of pride will try to rationalize it some other way, but when this happens truly analyze what's going on, and embrace that fear. When you embrace it, you're not running away from it, and that means you can understand and master your fear.

Any time you have questions, get on askTRP and go for it. Don't accept any answers you receive unconditionally; part of being a better man is doing your own research, not just waiting around to be hand-fed.

Oh, and those cocky assholes you hate? You don't hate them for being cocky assholes. You resent them because they have the confidence to reach out and take, and you've been told you have to wait around with outstretched hand to be given. Time to stop following the rules, friend.

Do the work. Push through the pain. Be the hero of your own story.

bankruptedcasino · 2013-12-12T16:12:47+00:00

Every time this sub gets mentioned in a "worst subreddits of reddit" post, it gets more subscribers. I love it. A similar post brought me here and, though I already subscribed to TRP philosophy before I came here, I was so grateful to find out that I wasn't alone and that other people thought the same way I did.

I am currently a beta and I think I want to change, but I am scared of changing into one of those cocky assholes that I hate.

Chances are that if we met on the street, you wouldn't think that I am one of those cocky assholes that you hate. Most of the women in my life wouldn't say that I'm an asshole, either. That includes the women I'm banging along with women I'm friends or acquaintances with. If you asked them what they thought of me, I assume you'd get responses like "intimidating", "stubborn", or "principled". These are not euphemisms for "asshole", but a reflection of the fact that these women know that I establish and enforce standards, and those who don't measure up to my expectations can take a walk.

You can do the same thing. The girl who brought you here walked all over you because you didn't establish and enforce standards. You allowed yourself to be treated this way, and continued to reward and encourage her reprehensible behavior by always offering your shoulder for her to cry on.

A lot of hate gets thrown at this sub because people think we're misogynistic women-haters. Sure, there are some of those here, but I doubt everyone feels that way. Most are like you. Men who've been fed the bullshit and did what their mothers, their girl friends, and the media told them to do. And when it blows up in their face time and time and time again, they come here looking for answers. It's usually the last stop on the long road to a fulfilling and rewarding romantic life in the arms of a woman who loves, adores, and cherishes every second she gets to spend with you.

I've been re-watching The Office (U.S.) lately. Spoilers Ahead: Jim Halpert is a classic example of the betas who come to this sub. Jim Halpert is not an evil man; in fact, he's every girl's dream guy. He loves, cherishes and worships One Woman and One Woman only; he gave her everything she ever wanted, such as a house, children, and his undying love and support and only asked for her companionship in return; he sacrificed his career at Athlead to save his marriage; and he remained ever loyal and faithful to his wife, even when he was tempted by the hot coworker slut in that hotel room. Every beta looks at Jim Halpert and says, "That's what I want. I want the beautiful wife and the loving family and the house with the white picket fence, and all I have to do is be nice to girls and sacrifice and toil for them and I'll get it!" Then they venture out into the world, little clones of Jim Halpert, and get steamrolled by a woman's biology. Sure, girls say they want the Jim Halpert type, but they are only attracted to the dual forces of aloof indifference and loving support. Even worse, they are more attracted to aloof indifference at the beginning of a courtship, and loving support at the end when she's given up her body and has started to fall in love with you. In the real world, a man who pines after Pam Beasely every day for seven years very likely is not going anywhere near her vagina. Just watch a few episodes of MTV's "Friendzone" if you don't believe me.

That's why this sub is called "The Red Pill". You can take the red pill and see what the real world of sexual social dynamics for what it is, or you can continue to live in the fantasy that Jim Halpert gets the girl at the end of the story. It's your call.

And I'm also worried that most of the stuff on this subreddit is totally fantasy and that acting the way this subreddit tells you to act will just make you look stupid.

Most of the stuff in this sub is the exchange of ideas and helpful advice from men who have Game or are learning to use Game in their daily interactions with girls. Take every piece of advice with a grain of salt, and don't be afraid to adapt the general principles of Game to your own personal style. It's like art. I can teach you how to hold a brush and how to mix colors, but only you can apply the paint to canvas.

One person mentioned The Book of Pook. That's very, very good. And free! Another great resource is Chateau Heartiste. I've read him for years. Start at the beginning and work your way through. CH is a painful read for most. You'll see errors in your game that you didn't even know were errors. Suddenly, you'll understand why that phone number you pulled last month went silent and why that girl you took on three dates stood you up on your fourth. Save the best articles that teach you the most on your phone or favorite them in your internet browser. Re-read them to refresh on your game.

You probably will feel stupid when you send your first trial text, or when you start artificially raising your value to a girl because they are so different from what you've been taught to do by all your guy and girl friends who are trapped in loveless, going nowhere relationships. I sure felt stupid when I arbitrarily didn't return my girlfriend's calls for a week, but I didn't feel so dumb when I eventually reappeared and had a love slave for a month.

All I can do is say: Trust me. This shit works. And you won't know that for sure unless you try it.

In addition, assuming this does work, I am an emotional guy, and it seems like if I do this stuff I will have to hide my emotions from everybody including myself.

Keeping your emotions in check is called "State Control". There are lots of Game articles on state control, and it is the most difficult thing to teach a person new to Game. There are many more articles that address this better than what I can do here, but the gist of it is that you must recognize there is a difference between Inner Game and Outer Game.

In order to be successful with women, your Inner Game and your Outer Game must be congruent. You can't appear to be confident and aloof outwardly, only to be, in reality, a sniveling pile of goo on the inside. Inner Game focuses on changing your confidence, extroversion, social skills, and courtship routines from the inside out. I used a lot of Outer Game tactics in the beginning and I was rejected a lot. It wasn't until I focused on Inner Game that my success with women improved.

If I could condense Inner Game into three sentences, it would be these: You are the prize to be won. She is to work hard to earn your exclusivity, commitment, and devotion. Nothing is given for free.

As if I haven't linked to CH enough already, here's a great primer on inner game.

I, and many others, on this sub are here to help you. Best of luck.

TankVet · 2013-12-12T14:42:16+00:00

It's not about being cocky, it's just about being a man. You don't have to be a loudmouthed asshole to be an alpha male. You can be polite, considerate, generous and decent and still be an alpha.

This isn't a magic trick to make women fall into bed with you. It's a way of living that actually makes you more of a man. You dismiss the entitlement and pretention of people around you, become wholly intolerant of bullshit, and your life gets way better. It simply has the added benefit of being an extremely effective way of getting women.

whatever6 · 2013-12-12T13:32:31+00:00

google: book of pook

And I'm also worried that most of the stuff on this subreddit is totally fantasy and that acting the way this subreddit tells you to act will just make you look stupid.

You already look stupid. What have you got to lose?

yabber_wonkey · 2013-12-12T13:34:17+00:00

Is TRP for you?

Do you want to be fun, smooth, light-hearted, and irresistible to the women that actually find you attractive? Do you want this improved version of yourself to be your real self?

Or do you want to be strung along, again, by the next self-centered bitch that catches your eye?

Watch Carey Grant in Charade. The line that sums up the whole philosophy;

~~Katharine~~ Audrey Hepburn asks him “Do you know what’s wrong with you?”

“What?"

“Nothing.”

Interested in getting this reaction from women? Interested in getting them to chase you?

Start reading. Start working. Improve. Succeed.

EDIT: as /u/Sunny_McJoyride pointed out I named the wrong actress. Thanks for keeping me honest!

H3lius · 2013-12-12T15:24:03+00:00

Might I suggest No More Mr Nice Guy instead of TRP at first. TRP is too much and just covers up the emotional issues that make you a nice guy. It will prevent you from becoming an one of the cocky assholes, but instead build your frame into the true you and everything else will follow: https://7chan.org/lit/src/Robert_Glover_-_No_More_Mr_Nice_Guy.pdf

Atleticomadrid · 2013-12-12T13:58:33+00:00

Hey man, welcome. We've almost all been at the point you are at right now. I was until 3 months ago then I started following the advice here and now I consider TRP my 2nd family.

I've had more personal growth in past 3 months from applying RP theories than I've had in the past 5 years. TRP is all about being the best man you can be.

Read the sidebar if you haven't already. I also recommend reading the 48 laws of power and apply it to your everyday life. It's a heavy read, but if you make the effort of applying it you will become a better man. And after all, isn't that what we all strive for?

TheIslander829 · 2013-12-12T13:48:53+00:00

Yep.

Start by reading Confessions Of A Reformed Incel. It's in the sidebar.

Archwinger · 2013-12-12T16:34:31+00:00

The Red Pill isn't really something you do. It's more like something you become, or maybe something you internalize. There's this huge body of knowledge that you just have to immerse yourself in that will change the way you see the world and human interactions. It's not really complicated knowledge, or even that big of a secret. The Red Pill isn't as complex and deep as people like to think. A lot of Red Pill "truths" are the sort of thing that will make you say "duh," not "wow."

It's really not about "becoming a cocky asshole." I'm actually kind of sick of reading this gross oversimplification again and again. People keep trying to condense a very robust lifestyle and body of information into a one-page list of bullet points, tips, and tricks, and that's where you end up with stupid stuff like "be an asshole" and "all women are slut cheaters." Those items, and various other "tricks" are very terrible oversimplifications.

The "big secret" that's not really a secret at all is that if you want to attract women, you actually have to be attractive. And being needy, clingy, gushing complements all day, and buying flowers isn't nearly as attractive (it's actually kind of unattractive) as being confident, independent, successful, and giving off the perception of a powerful, dominant guy with leadership qualities who could have his choice of women.

The real key is that in your quest to become physically fit, intelligent, socially apt, professionally successful, and a more interesting and attractive person overall, you need to be doing this for you, not to get girls. When you have your own interesting life to live, a job you like doing, hobbies you like doing, a fitness regime you enjoy, and in short, have your own shit going on that's important to you, you don't fall into the trap of making your girl the most important center of your universe. Women want to be important to their man, but they don't want to be the only thing he has going on or the most important thing in his life. That reeks of desperation, neediness, and a guy who doesn't have options. If a guy has nothing else going on in his life save for dating you, and you're the only woman he could attract, he's a pretty low value mate. And what's that say about you if you're dating him?

toysjoe · 2013-12-12T14:47:29+00:00

Don't mistake Red Pill for Seddit 2.0 or game 2.0.

It's not. It's waking up to the true nature of women, which is not as pristine and innocent as they (and society) would like you to think.

Red Pill is not like game tactics that you can use to get laid. It's a set of facts that you use to live your life. For example, in the back of your mind you know fire is really hot and dangerous. Does knowing that make your life safer? No. What makes your life safer is, because you know fire is dangerous, you install fire alarms in your home and you keep a fire extinguisher next to the stove.

Does Red Pill work? No, not just by knowing it. It's what you do with that knowledge.

After finding out the truth, I view women with disdain. When you ask the question, "does it work", it will have to depend on what your question is. I work out, my body has improved significantly. My academics have become top-notch. Have I gotten laid? Well no. Have I had chances? Definitely.

To be honest with you, after swallowing the Red Pill, my scorn for women vastly outweighs my sexual and romantic desires.

(A part of the Red Pill is the MGTOW, google it. It may be for you.)

If my goal was to get laid, does it work? No. My goal is to improve myself. In that regard, it has definitely worked.

Edit: You can get laid. I just choose not to.

Dillett7799 · 2013-12-12T13:28:20+00:00

Op, here is what trp boils down to. You are your own master. You want a girl you have to make her want you. Women want the cocky assholes you hate. Right now you are emotional and weak. It's not working for you. The red pill will. You have to be the one to decide to take it though.

Also, lmao at the streisand effect that is happening. Op is possibly the first to come here from that thread and won't be the last.

Fhom · 2013-12-12T13:29:47+00:00

First off, welcome, brother.

Second, I think you need to do a little work by yourself before asking questions, because so much has already been said that, without offense, there is very little chance any question you ask has not been answered a hundred times.

Read every link in the sidebar. Read a bit of Chateau Heartiste, and of Return of Kings.

You will understand much. Your eyes will hurt, etc.

The most important thing to understand is that Redpill is a way of bettering YOURSELF. Becoming an asshole through the redpill mentality is perfectly possible, but it all depends on YOU. It won't happen "by chance".

Well now there are a lot of people who write and understand TRP better than me.

Cold_August · 2013-12-12T13:21:07+00:00

it seems like if I do this stuff I will have to hide my emotions from everybody including myself

You could learn that or you could learn to be responsible for and to control your own emotions.

2013-12-12T14:08:38+00:00

You don't have to be a cocky asshole. Just don't put her needs ahead of yours, and don't let her change you or manipulate you into doing something you don't want to do.

GunsGermsAndSteel · 2013-12-12T16:49:45+00:00

"Afraid of seeming like one of those cocky assholes"

...You mean those cocky assholes who get all the power, money, and pussy they want? I love being an arrogant bastard. Yes, other people complain about me. But they do it from their knees.

Kardlonoc · 2013-12-12T16:30:33+00:00

Let me get to the point: I am currently a beta and I think I want to change, but I am scared of changing into one of those cocky assholes that I hate.

The thing about cocky assholes is from a distance is hard to tell them apart from the confident men. Once you learn its clear as night as day why the confident guys get all the girls and why the cocky assholes get spurned but by numbers game get the girls anyway.

You want to be a confident man certainly. Every guy wants to be. But to stop being a beta you gotta ask yourself how important is your happiness is, not other peoples. Thats the different between dominant and submissive, is doing things that make you happy instead of being happy with making others happy.

So let me ask you: did you ever consider stealing this girl from this guy? No, not waiting until she was "available" but rather just outright dating, dining and fucking her until the other guy didn't matter?

The road to hell is paved with good intentions but the reality is certain characteristics like being assertive is characteristic girls like. Did you ever drop the hint you wanted to fuck her? Not just "be" with her, you can be with fucking anyone, thats platonic and that's what you have right now. What makes a relationship different from all other social connections is the sex and you need to assertive in the matter in telling her that indeed you want her in that way.

I think that desire you have should be so apparent that you also need to socialize with other women in the same extent. There is nothing wrong talking to various women at the same time and saying "This is what I want" doing so makes yourself seem less available and more valuable.

Lastly don't a let a girl drag you on. Say what you want and if she says no, move on, its her loss. I will say this here because its RedPill but you cannot not be just "friends" with girls you want to fuck. In fact, you cannot be friends with most girls because of that. You need to decide if you actually want to fuck this person or be their friend. You can't do both, and if you want to do both its your fault not theirs when you hear shit like "my boyfriends dick is too big..."

If you want to stop being beta you need to get out this supplicating mentality and have a mentality that gets what you want.

thebigspooner · 2013-12-12T22:32:54+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Multicorn · 2013-12-12T20:20:58+00:00

Think of American society as being a 300 million person committee. We suck at picking politicians this way, we suck at making laws this way, why would we be any good at setting social standards this way? We suck at seeking justice this way, which is why we have judges because mob rule would be pretty nasty. There's a reason why Apple doesn't design their hugely successful products by committee, and there's a reason I dread hearing that word associated to the software design process in my professional life.

TRP doesn't take a vote on how we should behave. It uses observation and evolutionary science to explore a new kind of math that runs contrary to everything many of us were taught about relationships, or being a man in this strange society for that matter. Our well-meaning parents wanted us to be well behaved, to stay out of jail, and to hold down a decent job where we can earn a living. That's why they conditioned many of us to be beta providers. And hey, they didn't know any better. They did a good job with the tools they had. But it's time to take your fate in your own hands and complete the education, overwriting old theories with the latest science.

To me, when you dig down through the details, all it is really promoting is awareness of the world (rejection of "the matrix"), and honesty with others and yourself (setting boundaries, expressing yourself, saying no, etc.) It's no surprise many people feel threatened by this.

ButterMyBiscuit · 2013-12-12T21:51:58+00:00

One of my breakthrough moments was during college. I always hated the douchebag, bro-y dudes, just like you, OP. I told myself that they could have that life, the cute girls, whatever, but I was smarter and wittier than them and I'll find greater success one day and I'd prefer that.

I got into a situation where I was hanging out with a group of them, and WHAT THE FUCK, they were all pretty cool dudes. Most of them were smart, most of them were funny, but in addition they were built, confident, and articulate. They had everything I had, and so much more. My ego was shattered and my perception of the world around me changed after that.

slcjosh · 2013-12-13T00:22:15+00:00

Improving yourself doesnt mean you morph into a frosted tip puka shell wearing meat head douche bag, keep that in mind.

Since joining this sub, yes ive taken my workouts more seriously, dressed a little sharper, but nothing else has changed when it comes to my personality accept one thing...I do what I want to do and I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks.

My career sky rocketed. Female attraction has jumped. I'm more confident. Think of it as self improvement, youre not becoming someone else, just the best version of yourself.

pcadrian · 2013-12-12T15:23:10+00:00

Welcome to the party. I have a great resource for you: Corey Wayne's ebook at understandingrelationships.com

IM_PRETTY_RACIST · 2013-12-12T15:52:15+00:00

This subreddit won't "work." It won't do a thing for you itself.

It's a good basis for looking at society (specifically our relationship to women in Western society) and in tuning your attitude towards others to glean the most from the society. These are often not the social norms you were taught or innate behaviors that you had learned - but that's a good thing.

Anyway, it's just a subreddit - the main thing to do is get a 'feel' for things - don't get so caught up in the culture among these dudes (you're not here to socialize, you don't have to spend 6 hours at the gym to talk to girls, etc.) - just go out and do your thing... Unless hanging out with folks like us is what you intend. You are your own master.

2013-12-12T16:11:26+00:00

You don't really have to hide emotions from yourself, but you do need to keep a cool head so that your judgement is clear and you can do things more strategically. We are all very feeling people, lots of anger and frustration especially. Many of us feel betrayed of misled and are collectively going through this "soylent green is people" thing.

What we are about is persuit of truth, specifically the truth about attraction. Obviously what (most) girls tell us is attractive is not what is actually attractive, and they are intentionally misleading us to take advantage of our resources, our kindness, our innate desire to fix problems. The folks who are succesful with women shock us because they "act like assholes", they don't seem to give a fuck about a woman's feelings, are dominant, obnoxious, and generally treat them like slaves and children.

There is more to it than being an asshole though, there is a game that only looks assholish from the outside. You won't turn into an asshole by learning and applying game, there are many styles of it that have varying success with different kinds of people. It is more that you find the courage to call girl a bitch if she's being one, that you are honest about your desires as a man and brave enough to go after them. There is a new fairness in it, that if you are going after a hot girl, you are willing to do what it takes to become a hot guy.

who_whom · 2013-12-12T16:57:45+00:00

Fake it until you become it.

No_disintegrations · 2013-12-12T18:04:55+00:00

I think, terminology aside, that most of the concepts discussed here are reinforced by situations from our own lives. If I was living in a bubble, I may tend to believe whatever people told me, but my experiences with women and relationships lean redpill.

seiken287 · 2013-12-12T18:37:01+00:00

Read whoism3

Ethan47 · 2013-12-12T18:55:47+00:00

Hey, a little late, but you are asking all the right questions and I wanted to answer with my personal experience.

I am currently a beta and I think I want to change, but I am scared of changing into one of those cocky assholes that I hate.

I was a complete nice-guy beta several years ago before the red pill was forced down my throat. Not being 'nice' does not mean you have to be a cocky asshole. Asshole game works, but that doesn't have to be your game. But you must not let anyone get away with something you find unacceptable, and you must be willing to walk away from them if they do. Every girl I see will at some point early on call me an asshole, usually while laughing. I just smile and say 'yes'. Doesn't mean that I truly am an asshole though.

And I'm also worried that most of the stuff on this subreddit is totally fantasy and that acting the way this subreddit tells you to act will just make you look stupid. In addition, assuming this does work, I am an emotional guy, and it seems like if I do this stuff I will have to hide my emotions from everybody including myself.

No, this is what great male friends are for. Separate your need for sexual outlet and emotional outlet. You don't NEED to get both needs met in the same place. I was that guy in high school who was friends with all the girls and thought I was in-touch with my emotions. Yet, whenever I had a real problem there were no friends to be found. Now my older brother is the person I confide in and my close male friends as well. The best part is, they'll call you out on bullshit.

seanjohn12117 · 2013-12-12T19:01:31+00:00

Lol we should make one of those askreddit threads once a week

Neat_On_The_Rocks · 2013-12-12T19:08:37+00:00

You sound like me. If you are like me, if you try and be like one of the Alphas here, you will almost certainly fail.

So what do you do? Use it as motiviation. Keep their ideals and beliefs in mind. Strive to better yourself as an individual.

If you're like me you aren't going to be able to flaunt confidence on your sleeve.But Once you are happy with yourself as an individual, the confidence will show through whether you are sheepish or not. Thats what this is all about. Confidence in yourself as an individual. Once you have achieved this main goal, many of the red pill beliefs come naturally. You will respect women but not idolize them. You will place yourself on the pedestal instead of others, and if someone -man or women- wants to be with you as a friend or more, they will have to earn it.

drrrrrr · 2013-12-12T19:51:50+00:00

I would say as opposed to "acquire more info" responses in this thread, what you need to do is go ACT. So you want to know if TRP really works? I could tell you, or you could go make some changes in your life, and make some changes in how you act around women. The latter is what will really convince you. When you are just hearing the theory, you are able to stay back and hamster, like "oh this theory sounds OK, but I have my little fears, insecurities, and hatred for guys who are cocky, so I'm not sure what to think". That is bad.

Essentially TRP is unique because it is objective and at least attempts to be extracted from reality. You have to take a little bit of it, apply it, and test it for yourself. You will find that some things work for you, and some don't. Later, you go a little deeper, and then apply that. The mind cannot entertain novels and blogs worth of info and act on them in any given situation. What it can do is take maybe 2-3 principles, apply them and internalize them, and then take another 2, etc.

Information overload, paralysis by analysis, etc is bad. It plagues communities like PUA and fitness since the beginning of time. It will plague you if you try to understand all of TRP before you act. Take a leap of faith - try it out. Worst case scenario, a couple girls think you are a jackass, so what.

Doomsday_ · 2013-12-12T20:09:33+00:00

I am scared of changing into one of those cocky assholes that I hate.

You don't have to be an asshole, you just have to stop putting women on pedestals and be honest with them about your needs & desires. Refusing to be "friends" with a women when she doesn't reciprocate your sexual desires doesn't make you an asshole--it just makes you realistic. Women much prefer a man who is "real" with them than a man who is "nice" (i.e. acts nice out of the ulterior motive of getting into her pants, which doesn't work).

I am an emotional guy, and it seems like if I do this stuff I will have to hide my emotions from everybody including myself.

This isn't entirely accurate. It's better to describe state control as being in touch with your emotions (i.e. you are aware of them) but not letting them control you. You should experience and acknowledge your feelings--only then can you truly master your feelings and yourself, and thus master the way you interact with the world.

HigglyBumps · 2013-12-12T20:27:28+00:00

Hey Bob, I get what you're going through. Most everyone here went through almost exactly what you're describing.

TRP isn't about rules and 'do this and the girls will fawn over you'.

You won't just become a cocky asshole, that takes years of dedication to the ignorance of people around you.

The basics of this forum are tried and true, read up on the sidebar. Take those things to heart and make them your own, if you find something you disagree with, Mark it and remember that not everything will be applicable to you.

I am a strongly empathetic, and even feminine male, and TRP hasn't squashed that out of me because it doesn't seek to make you conform.

TRP only wants you to be as much of you as you can handle.

Some people trapped in the beta mindset will say, "Who I am is the quiet nervous guy who is always thinking with my heart."

Beta traits do not make a person, alpha traits do not make a person.

You are who you are, regardless of how you show it socially.

Hateblade · 2013-12-12T22:36:01+00:00

Change into what you want to change into. Don't try to change to just to get some broad.

2013-12-13T00:05:38+00:00

Yes.

EricTheRedd · 2013-12-13T04:43:29+00:00

Most of what needs to be said has been said but here's my little contribution. Changing a lifetime of passivity will not happen overnight. And TRY is not some switch that will magically make women fawn over you. At its core it's about bettering yourself; regaining your gender identity, increasing your self confidence, improving your self image and ultimately being true to yourself, your desires and not letting anyone (not just women) tell you how to act or live your life. As you evolve others will be attracted to you because of these qualities.

Basically... take care of yourself and the rest will follow.

KissTheBridesmaid · 2013-12-13T16:56:20+00:00

Unfortunately all it takes these days to be considered an asshole is having a backbone, being assertive or dominant and not taking shit from women. Especially this last one. This makes women call us assholes because we just won’t do what they want us to and just won’t validate them like they want us to.

So they call us assholes to guys like you (who give them their validation) and fuck guys like us (who make them tingle).

Most guys then also see us as assholes because that’s what they have been told by women. (and because of jealousy) Anyways most of us here have been through similar shit. This community will honestly help you. Welcome.

2013-12-12T15:53:16+00:00

There is no 'One.' There is just yourself. The sooner you realize this, the better off you'll be.

I suggest you also look into MGTOW.

http://www.mgtow.com/

/r/MGTOW

thecajunone · 2013-12-12T21:36:27+00:00

Ha ha you poor kid, you are being bombarded with information. Your reading list must be six months long already. Good luck my friend.

2013-12-13T04:19:42+00:00

< I am scared of changing into one of those cocky assholes that I hate

lets make ONE thing very clear. Men and Women, are TWO very different creatures. What a man says, is definitely not what a women hears and understands.

What a woman means, is not what she says, and thus is not what a man intends to understand.

So, let's come to the term "asshole." What is an asshole? You'd think that men and women would share the same idea what constitutes an asshole. But they don't, which is not at all surprising.

To a man, an asshole is one who is generally rude and has a very unsociable temperament. And this is the general definition across the board. Since men have held power over ideas and communication, this idea spread and people have used this idea to mean, a man without regard for social customs/norms.

Women also use this definition, I'm not saying they don't. But since they're not men, they've had to adapt to ideas men use, and then throw in their own perspective into the mix. Which confuses a hell of a lot of men. Because here are creatures whose brains are built different than our own, trying to live like us, as though they are the same. But they're not. Men and women are undoubtedly different in every way.

What women mean by "asshole" is, a man who does not let her get her way. i.e. a man who proves a challenge, someone who does not let her walk over him, someone who does not take her shit and isn't fooled. Someone, who does not let her dictate his frame and he does not fall into her frame.

That is a woman's definition of what an asshole is. Now, you can choose to become a real asshole, a man's definition, or you can just be a challenge to women, which they call asshole. Which is entirely different from yours and my definition from what an asshole is.

I hope that clears things up for you. I'm new here too.

Clauderoughly · 2013-12-12T16:27:15+00:00

The single biggest, most important thing you can learn first is to say "No" to people like her.

You need to do some introspection and really come up up with some boundaries that you will stick to, and swear than you'll never get used like that again.

You need to develop the mental discipline, as well as the physical one.

Saying no to people sounds easy, but if you have been trying to make everyone happy all your life, then it is surprisingly hard.

Look up "No More Mr Nice Guy" and read it.

SomeguyUK · 2013-12-12T16:14:15+00:00

Be warned, this subreddit is full of guys who think all women are the same, and that they are automatons who will bend to your will if you can only exhibit the 'right' behaviours.

I'm not saying it's all wrong, some of it is interesting.

But if you are going to strive to be something you're not by trying to emulate the 'alpha male', be aware it might make you even less comfortable with yourself than you are already.

most of the stuff on this subreddit is totally fantasy

It could well be. Keep an open mind either way.It seems to me that a lot of the teachings here are to help you get a certain 'type' of girl. The ultra-hot, attention seeking,flip-flopping friendzoning type. These girls are often pretty fucked up themselves. Just remember to ask yourself, is this worth changing yourself for?

Personally I don't believe there is such thing as an 'alpha' and 'beta' male. Human relationships are far more complicated and flexible than that.

Title	Does this really work?
Author	Bobbinfickle
Upvotes	161
Comments	135
Date	December 12, 2013 1:06 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1sppra/does_this_really_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/does-this-really-work.8770 https://theredarchive.com/post/8770

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