Hi. If you’re a conservative lurker, this isn’t meant to demonize you or say I hate you. Hell, you might even consider yourself a conservative and agree with everything I’m about to say. I’m more or less using “conservative” because most men I’m describing here align with conservatism.

Today I opened twitter and saw Steve Harvey trending. The crime? In 2010 he gave an interview saying men and women can’t be friends and that most, if not all men, are just trying to fuck their female friends whether they realize it or not. I subsequently saw posts showing Chris Rock’s comedy sketches that demonstrated the same thing. Now here’s my issue:

You can’t claim to be a men’s advocate and then demonize men as creepy fuckers who want to seduce all women and are incapable of seeing women as anything other than sex objects. Now, when I bring this up to feminist women, they agree, but they largely don’t understand the internalized misandry and the self hatred these men have for other men, and then go on and ADOPT that same hatred.

But on the other hand here. Why are these men shocked when women say “all men are rapists, abusers, etc.” when we have conservative, “alpha male” types who teach their daughters the exact same thing? You think these feminist women are misandrist out of nowhere? They’re learning their misandry from men like them!

This is something that I have had to encounter when talking to conservative men in men’s spaces. Many of them engage in this self deprecating rhetoric and are completely fine with demonizing other men: as long as they have access to women. For them, a misandrist woman is perfect! As long as they have sexual access. Because many of them subscribe to purity culture ideals, a misandrist woman is perfect for them: she can stay away from men as long as she’s popping pussy for 1 man alone. Subs like the redpill are just more open about saying that.

And this is ultimately my problem when conservative men interact with mens issues. They don’t call out the controlling fathers and the purity culture toting religious figures and the steve harvey’s: they defend them. And use their advocacy for men’s rights to defend them, even when their statements hurt men by implying all men are potential rapists and fuckbuddies who only care about sex.

This isn’t to shit on male sexuality, which is already shitted on by radfems like Catharine MacKinnon. But male sexuality isn’t a beast that needs taming, even though both radfems and conservatives often agree on this. The difference is that conservative men want to accept it and use it to victim blame assault survivors, while radfems treat male sexuality as the beast conservatives - and conservative men - present it to be. No where in this process did anyone stop to think if male sexuality was even a beast to begin with, that male sexuality isn’t just looking to fuck anything with a pussy (or anything else for that matter).

So frankly, I’m at my wits end with conservative men and their advocacy, because they literally fuel radfem statements and agree with their premises. They only differ by wanting to accept the beast, which comes with a host of victim blaming issues for those who are rape survivors. If men’s advocacy remains in conservatives hands, I promise you all that misandry will only get worse.