• I need men’s rights because when she changed her mind the next day, I went to jail for 5 years;
  • I need men’s rights because I was the victim of abuse but nobody believed me;
  • I need men’s rights because I am less likely to go to college, and if I do, I will make less money than my female contemporaries;
  • I need men’s rights because the president sees the shrinking number of men in colleges across America as “a great success”;
  • I need men’s rights because people question if I am a predator when I am alone with my child;
  • I need men’s rights because a man’s appearance, height, and weight has a greater affect on his income than it does for a woman;
  • I need men’s rights because saying “it’s impossible to discriminate against men in our society” allows people to discriminate with impunity;
  • I need men’s rights because traditionally masculine characteristics are virtues not flaws;
  • I need men’s rights because the likelihood of my death coming by suicide is four times higher than it is for women, though I receive little support;
  • I need men’s rights because it is not considered bigoted or sexist to deny me a male safe space at my college by those who have possessed their own safe spaces for decades;
  • I need men’s rights because it is assumed that a meeting of men in a male safe space is automatically going to devolve into hateful sexism and violence;
  • I need men’s rights because broad gender-wide slurs against men are socially accepted;
  • I need men’s rights because my life, career, reputation and connection with my family can be easily destroyed by a single, false and anonymously whispered accusation;
  • I need men’s rights because when women stumble blame rests on society, but when men stumble it is their fault;
  • I need men’s rights because in my physically demanding career, I am expected to do much more work for “equal” pay;
  • I need men’s rights because it is fine to call me a “dick”, a “cock”, or a “prick” on the street or on television; a woman must never be called a “cunt”;
  • I need men’s rights because talk-shows think it’s funny if I am wounded or sexually mutilated by a woman;
  • I need men’s rights because while the rape of a woman is properly regarded as a crime, the rape of a man is funny;
  • I need men’s rights because mutilation of male infants is considered normal – and those arguing for the protection of male infants from mutilation are regularly slandered as anti-semites and bigots;
  • I need men’s rights because my sexuality is routinely characterized as violent pathology, rather than as a natural part of my human identity;
  • I need men’s rights because women assume it’s my fault if I am assaulted by a woman;
  • I need men’s rights because people think it is irresponsible to have me work around children;
  • I need men’s rights because I have the right to the same sexual sovereignty given to women;
  • I need men’s rights because I believe that the feminist idea that a woman in the United States is equally oppressed as a woman in Afghanistan or Saudi Arabia in cruel and insulting;
  • I need men’s rights because I should not be ashamed of my sexuality;
  • I need men’s rights because women who find me unattractive will shame me can call me creepy for politely interacting with them, and they will be praised for this cruelty;
  • I need men’s rights because I was sexually harassed by several drunk women twice my age and everyone at the party thought it was funny;
  • I need men’s rights because my size and strength is commonly used to pretend that I am violent, which I am not;
  • I need men’s rights because if I am small or weak doesnt mean I have a Napoleon complex;
  • I need men’s rights because the type of car I drive does not give you the right to shame me or belittle me;
  • I need men’s rights because I have the right to associate with other men without legal action forcing me to allow women, too;
  • I need men’s rights because if I am assaulted by my spouse, and I attempt to seek help, I risk arrest, imprisonment and life-long censure – even if I do not defend myself, even I am seriously injured while she is untouched;
  • I need men’s rights because I earned my accomplishments; they were not given to me by a fictitious masculine conspiracy;
  • I need men’s rights because I have a right to be a father for my own children;
  • I need men’s rights because, as a man, I am much more likely to be physically assaulted than a woman;
  • I need men’s rights because I will be chastised as a coward, and a failed man if I do not sacrifice my life to save a woman in a time of crisis;
  • I need men’s rights because laws exist that demand harsher penalties for men for the same crime;
  • I need men’s rights because I have no lobbying voice in congress;
  • I need men’s rights because, as a man, I am more than 9 times more likely to be killed at work than a woman;
  • I need men’s rights because I am more likely to die young, and much less money is being spent on my health problems;
  • I need men’s rights because, if I am killed in an accident, people will care less than if a woman or a child is killed. News readers make this clear every time they utter the phrase “women and children”;
  • I need men’s rights because society believes that my life is worth less than a woman’s;
  • I need the men’s rights movement, because I am a human being.

And finally, I need the men’s rights movement, because when I attempt to address any of these issues, my co-workers, my government, my media, my peers, my family, and the larger society I am a part of rises in unanimous voice to condemn me as a monster – simply for claiming my humanity.