Can Women give accurate dating advice to men?

RealRussShackleford · 2022-08-14T18:06:59+00:00

The problem with “dating advice” is it’s usefulness varies from woman to woman. People give dating advice based on what worked for them or on them.

Not that it could really happen in the real world but hypothetically best dating advice you could get would come from someone’s parents or ex lovers. Because it’s specific to them.

Anytime you use a phrase like “women like” you’re already losing the game. “This woman likes” is the successful approach.

Soft-Neat8117 · 2022-08-14T18:01:12+00:00

Most people give bad dating advice regardless of gender. Most people suck at giving advice in general.

No one really knows the answer, they either regurgitate what some online guru says or give advice based on their own personal successes, which may not be applicable to your situation.

RedPillDetox · 2022-08-14T16:31:33+00:00

The idea that women "don't know what they want" and therefore won't offer sound dating advice is nothing but hamstering from the average TRP guru to explain away the fact that women will often directly contradict what they teach and descredit them.

The truth is that TRP dating advice fails, and fails often, but whenever it fails it quickly gets explained away as how you "miscalibrated" or "failed a shit test somewhere" or otherwise did something wrong and you're encouraged to "take responsibility" as an empowerment trope. Instead of merely admiting the advice is wrong or limited.

All in all, dating advice is usually bullshit doesn't matter if from men or women, because what works for you may very well not be what works for everybody else. People are different, contexts are different, and so trial and error will be your best ally in this sort of thing.

softnmushy · 2022-08-14T17:23:53+00:00

From what I have seen, women usually do not give great dating advice. They give great relationship advice, but dating is a tricky process for men and most women have zero experience being in a mans shoes.

Big-Bonkin-Head · 2022-08-14T17:54:49+00:00

Relationship advice 100%, I learned how to be better with my first gf (current) with advice I got from women.

Dating around and advice about getting laid, I would say men give better advice on that as women have different ways of picking sexual partners

xvszero · 2022-08-14T18:53:34+00:00

Some can, some can't.

I think the main area some women have a blindspot is just in not really understanding, especially for guys who don't have a lot of experience talking to women, how much a guy has to put himself out there, sometimes acting against his own natural inclinations. You hear things like "don't worry, it will happen when you least expect it" and "just be yourself" and such and that is good advice in some ways, but in other ways well... "myself" for many years was hanging out alone on weekends playing video games. That's not going to get me a relationship. It didn't "happen when I least expected it" nor was there much of a chance of that, since I barely left my house. I actually did have to do some things that were very NOT me in order to be successful. Nothing that betrays my views and morals or anything, but just you know... be more assertive, get out more and such.

Some women struggle to understand that. Others get it. And contrary to what red pill dudes claim, there are actually a lot of women who don't really get approached much at all either, if ever, so they also need to learn how to put themselves out there. Probably not the SUPER HOT girl at the club, but every woman isn't the SUPER HOT girl at the club. Many women also struggle to get positive attention.

JerriLaMan · 2022-08-14T18:02:36+00:00

Accurate? No. Women don't know what it's like to be a man and navigate the world as a man and vice versa

Women can tell you what women find attractive but there is no general thing that women find attractive because WOMEN ARE NOT A MONOLITH (many people really don't get this part and think they can get away with generalising women in 'positive' ways)

Just because a woman generalises women it doesn't make her any more right than a RP guy, she's usually just speaking for herself

SweelFor- · 2022-08-14T16:39:09+00:00

Why couldn't they?

XihuanNi-6784 · 2022-08-14T20:48:28+00:00

Of course but it will be extremely generic and obvious. The problem with this question is when people ask for dating advice they're usually looking for a formula, or a dialogue tree. These can be useful to build confidence but overall almost certainly perform barely above average.

If you're in the "casual sex" game then of course advice is different because you're not looking for a genuine connection, just the best methods to trick people into sex. Even then it's clearly almost entirely a numbers game and success comes from the confidence of not needing to be yourself, but to embody a persona and run through a script.

Generally listening to people, being open, honest, and straight forward is the best dating advice someone can give if you're looking to make real connections and minimise drama. Doing that right usually takes time, serious brutal honestly with yourself about your insecurities and the ways you've been blaming others for your failings; but also self-compassion and a recognition that you are a valuable human being and you do deserve love (you're just not entitled to it).

afig83 · 2022-08-14T16:37:40+00:00

Absolutely. Women give men excellent dating advice especially if it’s in a strictly platonic friendship. This red pill community is so whack lol. Preying on young impressionable women. Gee how original. I agree that some women are toxic, and did in fact pass up good opportunities in their “prime” and now to complain about their poor life choices is not so becoming, but to lump all women “post wall” in this category is ridiculous. Most red pill content is for shock value and it’s good click bait on YouTube especially, for the creators. Especially if it’s a self proclaimed “pick up artist” they are making $$$ off of views and getting poor simps to sign up for their “classes” and “programs”.

keijokeijokeijo · 2022-08-14T16:37:22+00:00

Ask bisexual men, they know whats attractive in a man as well as how it’s like to navigate dating women as a man

lilycamilly · 2022-08-14T16:40:11+00:00

Yeah, absolutely.

richerthanrichard · 2022-08-14T18:06:12+00:00

It’s interesting how men feel men are always qualified to speak on any subject but will question if a woman really knows anything at all.

UnusualLingonberry14 · 2022-08-14T18:25:38+00:00

I think it's complicated, it depends on the woman. If I were basing it on my experience, I would tell you: 'prank her on tuiter and wait for her to open DMs for you and then start a long relationship'. But, lol.

xenon128lol · 2022-08-14T19:01:35+00:00

From the perspective of a woman, it really depends more the knowledge of the woman, her rationality and psychological education, than on her empathy. An empathic woman is very likely to say what you wanna hear, that you should be yourself and so on(which is not entirely incorrect, it just lacks some important aspects), because many women are taught to be kind and caring with everyone. However, think their dating advice is still closer to the truth than the one of RP guys, idiots like Andrew Tate, or incels, since they can at tell you what they actually like when dating someone, instead of telling you to just be as dominant and cold as possible. So all in all, consider a womans rationality when judging if her advice is good. Just like with almost everything, it depends on the individual case. I will make a post about dating advice for men mn, you can check it out if you want😊

uglymob5 · 2022-08-14T19:07:26+00:00

The only advice they need to give is to say where they want to be approached.

Ladies, where are you hoping to meet "Mr.Right"? Where you do want your dream man to approach you? Let's start there

Texan2116 · 2022-08-14T19:45:04+00:00

As a humble male..my view is ,for the most part... absolutely. Now as far as specifics go, thats another issue. Is someone a homebody? or not a homebody..are they athletic, into physical hobbies? Every one is different. But hearing things like ..maintaining hygiene, having at least a decent job, etc...pretty universal stuff.

spiraldinosaur · 2022-08-14T20:26:36+00:00

The problem is that every man and every woman is different. What works for one woman will be terrible advice for another.

The best advice - maybe the only advice - anyone can give, at least when it comes to dating someone other than themselves or someone specific, is always far more general and broadbrush. I can tell you exactly how I got dates with my girlfriend, but it would be a totally different story with any of my ex girlfriends.

I think a lot of people are looking for specific "techniques" and get disappointed when they don't get given a perfect chat up line or body language movement they can use.

Others - especially those in RP communities - might go in with preconcieved ideas of what women are like or what women want, then get pissy when the woman giving advice completely contradicts everything those RP bros told them (shocking!)

But ultimately, if you want advice on how to connect with women and what women like in a man, women are always going to have better advice than men, since they know it first hand. Just be cautious of anyone giving specific instructions and remember that while there will always be similarities, what every woman wants is different.

KingKunta2-D · 2022-08-14T20:47:38+00:00

No because one woman can't speak for all women. They can say general things that anyone can say. But once they go into specifics it's completely subjective. And other people are right to. Nobody gives good dating advice.

SmackMeDownBabe · 2022-08-14T20:59:14+00:00

Some yes, some no. But mostly no. Advice sucks, especially online. I've never been given any good advice. Can someone give a good advice to convince me, lmao

porkchop_47 · 2022-08-14T21:22:25+00:00

Most people lack emotional intelligence that’s why they give bad advice, regardless of gender.

Your_Nipples · 2022-08-14T22:17:38+00:00

I would not trust an advice coming from a woman, they are all different and what I've learned from my own experience is that people can disregard anything they pretend to like or dislike either because they realize that it's not that important or... They are that thirsty.

Everything is kinda negociable and tolerable when you lack self esteem or on the contrary smart enough.

bee_ghoul · 2022-08-14T22:59:44+00:00

My biggest ick is when I can tell that a guy is using some kind of “strategy”. It makes me feel like he thinks that I’m an idiot or that he trick or train me into liking him. It makes me feel like he thinks less of me and I lose interest. A guy could be a 10/10 but if he gives any indication that he believes that I can somehow be “achieved”, “unlocked” etc he’s a 0/10 straight away.

If you can treat a woman like a person, the same way you would your best friend, that’s the best way to get them to genuinely like you.

Radiant_Specific6542 · 2022-08-15T00:19:18+00:00

It's not impossible but I've never met a woman that gave good dating advice that produced results. I started listened to my best friend who's a natural and I was rolling in tail.

It's best to ask someone who gets girls.

JUST_WANTTOBEHAPPY · 2022-08-15T00:47:03+00:00

If you're looking for one night stand/ hookup advice. Women are terrible in giving it. Idk but that's my experience.

But if you're asking relationship advice, women seem to have good insight

Magnito-was-right · 2022-08-15T02:02:03+00:00

My advice is to appear to be the one who cares less. Even if you really like them. They will think you are someone special. Nobody likes clingy people. If someone is always trying to impress me I see them as low value. If I’m the one who feels compelled to impress you then I feel lucky to be with you.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2022-08-15T02:48:54+00:00

No they can't but never can men. Women can give dating advice from one perspective that can be very insightful in some ways but have some blind spots, and the same goes for men. It can be very helpful to understand the female experience of dating and what they do and don't like. But women don't have any experience being a man struggling in dating, and many aren't completely self-aware about everything that attracts them.

Ari9000plus · 2022-08-15T04:00:08+00:00

If the person handing out advice doesn't have a successful long term relationship...why would you trust their advice? I find it hilarious when single and desperate women hand out dating advice...sort of like "career counselors" at a low rank high school...if yer so smart about careers, that fuk you doing working at a high school? Same goes for ANY advice IMO. If you aren't living it, then why TF would I listen to you?

MagicalMichael1 · 2022-08-15T05:25:40+00:00

Ioannesnota · 2022-08-15T07:05:44+00:00

No one can give accurate dating advice, nor women or men. Every person is different, every person you date is different.

vhm3 · 2022-08-15T08:34:07+00:00

Women can give great advice but its accuracy depends on the woman in the dating scenario. We don't have special access to all women's minds and people in general are very bad at understanding what they want and their motivations.

The thing with red pill crap is it keeps talking about most women in dating to men who have not been successful in dating. These guys specifically should listen to women that are exceptions to these ideas. To illustrate what I mean, they constantly talk about how women want tall guys. Short guys would benefit more from actually listening to the women who say it doesn't matter because the women who don't care are their target audience.

I'm not going to pretend I know what it's like to be a man dating a woman, but no man is more qualified than me about what I want and like.

Nightchanger · 2022-08-15T10:50:03+00:00

If they're there to witness the event upfolding and aren't jealous to assume you'll leave them once you find someone. Than absolutely.

They're good intuiting other girls social cues, and to an alarming rate.

2020mademejoinreddit · 2022-08-15T11:10:19+00:00

No. Not dating advice. And contrary to some comments, not relationship advice either. Same goes for men.

Simple reason for that is the difference in different people and their lives.

It depends on who you ask.

The best way to determine on who to ask is to see how similar they are to you in their dating/relationship life.

Only when someone goes through the same things as you and come out of them successfully or with least damage, can they give you effective advice.

Remember, anyone can and they do give advice, often unsolicited. The major thing to look out for is, how effective it will be for your situation. The next thing to look out for is, was it tested by them or someone else in a similar situation as you?

There are many dating and relationship "experts" giving out advice and even charging exorbitant amounts for it, but most of the time, their "advice" is counter-productive.

So, there you have it. I prefer to take advice from those who have walked a similar path as me.

This is why I don't take advice about dating from playboys or relationship advice from married people, I do take advice from divorced people, because they show me what not to do.

And while we're at it, I never take advice from rich people about investments, because usually, apart from someone like Warren Buffet (maybe), they often don't give genuine advice and even when they do, it requires you to already be financially way above well off, like they were. They don't know what it's like to be poor, their advice will fail for anyone who is.

I do however tend to keep an eye on people's actions. Words are cheap, actions reflect reality.

earlerichardsjr · 2022-08-15T11:58:47+00:00

No. You don't ask a fish how to catch fish.

Google-Kahn · 2022-08-15T14:50:48+00:00

obviously we shouldn't generalize. But the main point that supports it is this: Women don't have experience picking up women, AS a man...

Artistic_Chip · 2022-08-15T20:47:01+00:00

No, men and women live in completely different worlds when it comes to dating

hsvgamer199 · 2022-08-16T01:30:04+00:00

Most women are going to give you well-meaning but unhelpful advice. Dating is drastically different for men so they don't usually understand. That's one of the reasons why men end up falling into the redpill manosphere.

vcreativ · 2022-08-16T12:33:51+00:00

The proof is in the pudding. All women, no. Some women, yes. Same as for men, some men may say something helpful, lots won't be able to. As soon as you generalise across a group the answer is basically always no.

Needs are different, perspectives are different, experiences are different. Women are wildly different from one another, men are wildly different from one another.

The issue is, if you're lost on your own and you solely depend on other's advice, it's not going to work. Most people don't mature past the it worked for me point of view.

You must be able to put external advice in a working frame for you, and yes, then their advice can be useful. But without putting the work in asking how or even if advice is useful and/or healthy to you, taking advice becomes quite a dangerous process.

Rook_Cross · 2022-08-19T18:51:44+00:00

Some can, some can't and sometimes it depends on the situation. Same with men, some can, some can't. You can see plenty of stories here who left men because other men gave them RP relationship advice. You have to discern what's good advice on a case by case basis, or what is good advice, but just didn't work with a certain person.

KingKunta2-D · 2022-08-22T03:08:53+00:00

Well.... a fish can't tell a fisherman how to catch a fish..... But if the fish could speak English and you talked to it. It could definitely tell you where they hang out at and what bait they like to eat. so yesish?

Title	Can Women give accurate dating advice to men?
Author	Zealousideal_Heart36
Upvotes	25
Comments	62
Date	August 14, 2022 4:12 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/woa0hv/can_women_give_accurate_dating_advice_to_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/can-women-give-accurate-dating-advice-to-men.1128071 https://theredarchive.com/post/1128071

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