How do normal people pair off?

goatismycopilot · 2022-06-30T19:53:05+00:00

Hot women are not on the market for long unless they are batshit crazy and even they find somebody.

Usually people pair off after milestone events. Finishing high school, college, graduate/professional school, or a few years into the first adult job.

If you are a woman and you are average, ugly, weird or introverted men will want to fuck you but not necessarily be in a LTR or get married.

Also all of my super duper ethnic friends the Italians, poles, Ukrainians ect got married younger. I had no religious friends growing up but I now live in a religious part of the US and most of the women I used to work with got married young.

My hot friends got married before my average looking friends. Even liberal progressive men instinctively want to lock down a hot woman and might waffle more on an average woman thinking they can get a better deal.

Everybody who wanted kids found somebody likely because they got flexible.

Siukslinis_acc · 2022-06-30T19:08:12+00:00

They meet, they interact with each other, if there is "chemistry" and they get along, they pair up.

rosephase · 2022-06-30T19:08:10+00:00

By making friends and being in community with others. Getting to know people so you know if you like them as a person, instead of just if you would happily fuck them. Basically stop dating and go do things in the world with people and get to know them.

sarkington · 2022-06-30T19:22:58+00:00

Socializing if you want personal compatibility

Photos, discussion and CVs if you want financial/aesthetic/other compatibility

Or both

Gigamon2014 · 2022-06-30T20:24:15+00:00

This is largely the cop out of mediocre people. There are plenty, plenty of sexy and educated women out there. In fact, I would say you're actually more likely to find attractive women on a college campus than on a night out in a bar.

This is what I mean by this bluepilled coddling of mediocrity. If you can't find attractive, educated and accomplished women the that's a YOU problem.

Pigeon_of_the_sea · 2022-06-30T19:28:47+00:00

I'm not sure why you feel the need to put others down by calling them superficial and vapid....for dating people they are attracted to? You're judging people that you don't know really harshly.

It's ok for you to have physical preferences, and it's ok for other people to have physical preferences. Dating at a young age is about having a good time. It's not superficial for anyone to like good looking people. It's normal. You think someone is cute, you date them, get to know their personality, and it works out or it doesn't. That's fine.

BlueMountainDace · 2022-06-30T20:07:23+00:00

A. if you're on dating apps, you shouldn't feel guilty about feeling superficial. That is all you have to go off of for most people since bios can be...lackluster.

B. "Normal people" of varying looks, personalities, education levels, etc pair off by building relationships. You meet people in common areas or through friends/family and then you build rapport. If there is some underlying connection (often starting with physical attraction), you build on that.

Sadly, most people are lonely and so don't dig too deep into what they really need out of a relationship and drift from "life moment" to "life moment" without knowing why they're getting married, having a kid, buying a house, etc.

WilliamWyattD · 2022-07-01T23:10:59+00:00

At some point, women settle sexually. This has always been the nature of the world.

The key for men is to accept this and optimize the situation nature has put you in.

If you are an average guy, you probably will 'beta bux'. You probably will not be the best sex she ever had on a purely physical, lust level. Your sex life may wax and wane as you get older.

That is just fucking reality. Do you really think it is better for the girl? Don't you think she would like to be super lustfully attracted to her mate all the time? Of course she would. But she isn't built like that--she can't feel that way for the kind of guy she is likely to be able to land. Her selectivity levels vis a vis what she can land are as much a curse to HER as they seem to the guy she is with.

But that is just how life fucking is. Just stop prioritizing constant, super hot sex like in porn. The average couple can make their sex life good enough that it doesn't need to be the reason the relationship goes south or ends. Make your sex life good enough. Make sure other aspects of the relationship are also strong. And then accept it all as 'good enough' and focus on the rest of life. If you aren't Alpha Giga Chad, why the fuck would you ever expect to have women respond to sexually just like they do to him? It just doesn't work that way. But it also isn't that important.

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-06-30T19:30:31+00:00

Do you want my brutally honest advice?

If you want a hot girl, you have to put in the effort to be a hot guy. Hot girls spend half of their pay checks on hair treatments, nails, eyelashes, lip injections, make up, not to mention the latest fashionable clothes and accessories. What you see is not an accident. I personally just spend 2.5-3 hours in the hair salon the other day to get my hair straightened out with keratin and then cut and styled. I've been getting compliments left and right and women are checking me out blatantly.

Not to be harsh but you do not look like you've even as much as been in the same room as a male fashion magazine. Your Tinder photos are with plain white T. This is the definition of average guy who takes no care of his appearance. I mean you couldn't care less about how you dress and the shoes you wear and styling your hair, but you want a hottie that spends 5 hours getting ready to out? Bro, you are delusional.

PurplePillEric · 2022-06-30T19:28:50+00:00

IN GENERAL::

Most people are lonely.

As soon as they meet someone they feel like they understand and enjoy the company of, they have the seggs and it creates a pair bond. As long as nothing too serious gets in the way, this continues and they would rather settle down than keep putting themselves out there so they get married.

This often works out It also often doesn't.

I don't feel this generalization needs any caveats for any particular gender, as even though men and women are very different and certain respects, they are more the same than they are different in general.

wtknight · 2022-06-30T19:26:56+00:00

By not only liking how someone looks, but by that person also having a compatible personality, compatible hobbies, and compatible life goals.

suganips · 2022-06-30T21:05:28+00:00

They met during social interaction in Algebra class She was expressionless at first But then smiled to indicate submission He rearranged his facial features to appear friendly After determining that their popularity status was comparable They decided that a relationship would be mutually beneficial.

no trend

-passepar2t- · 2022-06-30T22:46:08+00:00

"Low IQ." "Superficial and vapid." "Daemons."

As the slavs say, "с тобой все ясно."

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pop442 · 2022-06-30T19:26:02+00:00

Befriending or interacting with lots of people maximizes the opportunity to pair off with someone.

It will come quite naturally too once you get the hang of it. A "taken" woman and I started following each other on IG(strictly platonically. I'm not that type of guy) just based off the many interactions we had with each other and how well we click. Best believe if she wasn't taken, we could've hit it off easily.

catniagara · 2022-06-30T19:40:38+00:00

I date guys who look like me because they workout like me.

Substantial_Video560 · 2022-06-30T20:01:55+00:00

Never had much time for 'normies'. I much prefer quirky and weird people! 🤪

Kentucky_Supreme · 2022-06-30T21:13:14+00:00

They just meet whoever is within their proximity via circumstances. The women decide who's attractive and who's not. The attractive guys are free to make advances and then that's when the dating happens and ultimately pairing off. If the unattractive guys try, it's "creepy".

alfen-dave · 2022-07-01T17:10:32+00:00

People here be like; ''They go out, they meet, there's cehimstry, they bond'' ''tee-hee its so simple OP, youre complaicating things!, you re the weirdo''

Yet; Reddit is plastered of Dating subs, Relatiosnship subs, depressed celibate posts, everyone IRL has had their complaints about how they cant find dates, movies, dramas, shows, books and art are always telling stories of an individual struggling to meet someone or better yet; the journey IS to meet someone.

Even the bible had stories about people travelling miles away to meet potential partners.

801735 · 2022-06-30T19:39:23+00:00

I don't want to feel superficial about it.

You don't have to. Focus on what you want, not on what you don't want. It's all within you, in your power, you're doing it to yourself.

Ppdebatesomental · 2022-06-30T23:42:32+00:00

they just liked someone who liked them back

Frankly, this is actually a good head start. Decades later, I still like my husband and he’s my favorite person to spend time with. Luckily he liked me back. Why so judgmental? What exactly are you looking for?

FireGodGoesSeeknFire · 2022-07-01T05:56:31+00:00

Why is looks a bad way? I get that it doesn't require high IQ but that's actually what makes the occipital cortex such a powerful tool. Ot presents massive amounts of processed data to the consciousness without any conscious thought.

It would be like saying using combustion is such a low IQ way of getting energy, I feel bad everytime I light a fire. Fire is really useful!

Stunning-Potato-1984 · 2022-07-01T15:41:58+00:00

Uh finding a guy a friend of a friend brought to a party charming?

ObviouslyAnAltAct · 2022-07-01T17:44:41+00:00

So, I'm an ugly guy. I know it. The world knows it. It is what it is. I am tall, make extremely good money, and have other assets in my favor. However, I have an ugly face and a very ugly body shape for a man. Yet I personally was able to meet and seduce a gorgeous woman I've been with for more than a decade. I did it by having a carefully constructed (not fake or lying, but carefully controlled to maximize the better aspects of my personality and reduce the awful ones) social personality and being brave. I don't stand a chance online. I never will. But in reality I do. Most men do in reality as long as you have a modest EQ awareness. It takes guts to approach women in reality, and most don't like it, but the ones that don't can deal with it and get over themselves. Because I'm unattractive I'm used to being absolutely scorned by women, so the near constant rejections were no big deal after a while. Eventually I just got lucky and met the right one. But I will say this, it's a LOT of emotional effort and heartache at first. And truth be told, probably not worth it for the average man. The emotional companionship is nice, as is the sex, but pleasing a woman is a full time job and takes a lot of work. If/when this relationship ends I'll probably give up on women entirely. They just aren't worth (on average) the amount of work it takes to keep things running smoothly. Don't get it wrong. I won't go full on MGTOW or anything, but I'll just give up and maximize my life in other ways.

Lavish_Dreamer · 2022-07-02T01:27:43+00:00

People should not waste their 20’s fooling around as that is the best decade to find suitable partners. As one ages, it gets harder even for men unless he’s rich and he can marry a younger woman then.

Ohms2North · 2022-07-02T03:38:41+00:00

Noah selects one of each

NFthrowaway8302021 · 2022-07-12T05:53:40+00:00

OP is a normal looking dude who seems like he's in a bad head space. I genuinely mean this but you seem like you need to seek professional help because your emotional issues will hinder you u/Freelovehighway

RearwindowPinecone · 2022-06-30T18:57:22+00:00

woman values looks as much as man if not more,she has a physical attraction(mostly height and face) threshold,a guy must pass this threshold to have a chance with her,but if he barely pass the threshold,he must have a lot of money,status...etc to compensate

Title	How do normal people pair off?
Author	Freelovehighway
Upvotes	27
Comments	69
Date	June 30, 2022 6:52 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/vofu36/how_do_normal_people_pair_off/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-do-normal-people-pair-off.1209468 https://theredarchive.com/post/1209468

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no trend