To men who are worried that their date will expect to be wined and dined at a fine dining restaurant... the solution is easy

wtknight · 2024-07-26T23:26:05+00:00

Removed. This post is flaired Question for Men, but it is not a question.

Combatenjoyer23 · 2024-07-26T20:48:12+00:00

Lol I've never actually asked a girl to go dutch on a date because I feel too much social pressure to just pay. Kind of spineless, but it is what it is. The few times that the girl has offered to pay, she's asked it in a very unenthusiastic manner like "I guess we can like... Split the bill? If that's what you want?" And then I just sigh on the inside and pay for it anyway. There's only been one girl I've gone out with who was firm in her decision to pay and didn't make me second guess it. I still think about her today and I hope she's doing great.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-07-26T20:35:58+00:00

Dudes are also usually expected to make the plans. So if you don’t want to pay for an fancy/expensive meal, just take her somewhere else.

This really isn’t a crazy big issue.

Gary_Longbottom · 2024-07-26T21:39:08+00:00

I'm actually very happy with the status quo, it's a very easy filtering tool. Nearly 100% of the toxic, transactional, princess type women will demand that you plan and pay for everything and expect expensive dates. So simply drop these women and move on to the next; you just met her it's not like you have a deep connection. By doing so you will also filter out some decent women, but it's worth it to filter out almost all of the women who will ruin your life.

RahLyt · 2024-07-26T21:03:48+00:00

I honestly feel like I'm living under a rock. I don't know when men got this emotional.

I feel it's very simple. If you want to fuck, pay for the date. Women's sexuality is all about themselves.

In the social media world we live in, if you don't pay you'll add doubt to their self worth perception, and a girl that is not feeling sexy will not fuck you.

With that being said, if I ain't paying for shit.

Particular_Trade6308 · 2024-07-26T22:09:59+00:00

This post is about me, down to the $300 reference which I posted in another thread.

Here’s why this is an unhelpful post and just derails the conversation.

There’s clearly a paradigm shift, we’re moving from the girlboss era where women might be offended if you paid for a date; to the princess meta where it’s offensive if you offer to split. I’ve had women offer to split, and when I accept their offer they recoil because the offer was just a gesture.

Now, I personally pay for dates 1 and 2, and if by date 3 she’s neither splitting/paying nor planning any dates, I dump her (or pump-and-dump her). I’m not interested in being a woman’s daddy or rich boyfriend who subsidizes her lifestyle. This approach accounts for the paradigm shift above, as there are women willing to have a more balanced relationship who, due to expectations, would be bothered if the guy doesn’t pay date 1. I think women also shame their friends who split by calling them pickmes and stuff but I digress.

Thing is, this isn’t about me. We should be discussing the paradigm shift, not whether I can find a taco spot, or whether I’m poor, or whether I’d violate my principles to sleep with Rachel Weisz. Derailing the broader convo about the dating arena to call specific men cheap or lazy is simply unhelpful.

Proper_Frosting_6693 · 2024-07-26T21:18:16+00:00

For $300 you’d get a good hooker

acaciaelm · 2024-07-26T22:01:12+00:00

I don't complain But to those who do , i always recommend them to get drinks or go for coffee shop usually under 25$, before moving to your place for physical escalation

boom-wham-slam · 2024-07-26T22:34:09+00:00

Agree. I'll take a girl out if she's HV. Otherwise coffee it is.

sprckets21 · 2024-07-26T20:53:33+00:00

You take her to a fancy restaurant and you don’t know her, she will think you’re a desperate schmuck.

Make her come to a place across the street from you. Go to place most dishes $16. Cocktails and wine $10. That’s $40 for her. Otherwise you’re going to a nice cocktail place where it’s $15 a drink and she gets 3 drinks and an appetizer and that’s $60 for her.

You need to cut these dates short too, ask her over as soon as you get outside. If she doesn’t come over, you know she will for someone else. 70% of my dates come over to my place after, if she says she doesn’t do that she probably lying.

Gold_Supermarket1956 · 2024-07-26T20:53:44+00:00

The problem is women talk and you don't want a reputation that you do 50/50 dates cause then women just start calling you broke

Ultramega39 · 2024-07-26T22:34:25+00:00

My solution is to go somewhere that doesn't cost money, like the park or library. 😎

tiddermacss · 2024-07-26T21:50:44+00:00

are these real problems?

MikeArrow · 2024-07-26T22:57:36+00:00

I've never been on a date where I felt like I was expected to pay. I've only been on a tiny handful but they were all with women that had, y'know, jobs and money.

The last date I went on I offered to pay and she insisted on splitting (probably because she didn't want to encourage me and she was only going on the date out of obligation, but still)

DrMantisToboggan1986 · 2024-07-26T23:07:22+00:00

If I take this woman out three times, have to pay for it all because "it's my job as a man", and if she doesn't put out sex on the third date, - "it's her job as a woman to do so" - I'm dropping that bitch harder than a nuke on Hiroshima.

Cunning_Linguists_ · 2024-07-26T23:19:55+00:00

Women ruined "the expensive first date" anyways by foodie calling. Now dudes are taking them to Starbucks and they gotta deal with it.

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Solondthewookiee · 2024-07-26T21:47:06+00:00

It's not only easy to do, but it's not even hard to find women who will readily agree to it because they don't want to feel like they owe the guy something.

Title	To men who are worried that their date will expect to be wined and dined at a fine dining restaurant... the solution is easy
Author	Independent_Year
Upvotes	9
Comments	104
Date	July 26, 2024 8:29 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ecy3ox/to_men_who_are_worried_that_their_date_will/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/to-men-who-are-worried-that-their-date-will-expect.1525418 https://theredarchive.com/post/1525418

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