When Women Hookup They Are Playing a Bad Numbers Game

ThatBitchA · 2025-01-20T19:13:57+00:00

In my experience, if I was hooking up, it was to hook up. It wasn't to get a relationship. It was to get laid. Maybe get a fuck buddy out of it. But definitely not a relationship.

MongoBobalossus · 2025-01-20T18:56:09+00:00

What are we supposed to be debating here?

akesh45 · 2025-01-20T21:53:10+00:00

I don’t think that many women sleep with guys simply for fun. Then just hop onto the next guy. Most women aren’t like that and most men aren’t like that. Sex usually involves some sort of feelings, and if those feelings aren’t shared one of them is going to end up hurt about it. Women hookup with desirable men because the opportunity cost not to results in no chance, so to get their attention they use a hookup to get his attention and further access to him.

Woman hooking up on vacation or with visiting foreigners invalidates this theory entirely.

IME, woman like hookups when the downsides are minimal and the sex is very good(like vacation sex with some hot dude she'll never see again).

UpbeatInsurance5358 · 2025-01-20T20:13:38+00:00

"I think most women are easy and love to have the pants charmed off them. At the same time, I think women just being whores jumping on guys for no reason is rare. Sometimes women just get hormones going and want a random guy, but often it’s more than only lust why she’s hooking up with him."

And they wonder why women don't do ONS very often....

My_House_on_Mars · 2025-01-20T20:35:51+00:00

The people I know who are into casual sex, say it from the beginning before anything happens. I know all the times I did it, was having that in mind.

People have sex because they are horny, I don't think women think "I'm going to have sex with him so that he doesn't go away" in fact, quite the opposite "I wish I didn't have sex so early, he's not going to take me seriously"

AntonioSLodico · 2025-01-20T22:25:21+00:00

Way back when, after some life trauma and a rough breakup, I had a hot hot mess phase. I looked great on paper, was charming, but was definitely not ready for a relationship... even though I thought otherwise. It taught me a lot, especially this:

Plenty of women will hook up and fuck guys with no desire to get into a relationship with them. And many of them will keep coming back if its good. It just requires you being seen as very fuckable but not relationship material. And yeah, it's fun, but it gets old.

Fun_Breakfast697 · 2025-01-20T20:16:10+00:00

For most women who routinely hook up, the hookup is part of the vetting process. Men who are terrible lays benefit enormously from women who wait to develop an emotional connection. By the time she finds out she's already attached and much likelier to put up with it.

If you are someone who heavily prioritizes sexual compatibility and you are someone who can enjoy casual sex, there is literally no reason to hold off. You either: 1) have bad sex and then discard him, 2) have good sex with someone who doesn't end up becoming anything more serious but it's fine because you still had fun and always knew that was a strong possibility, or 3) have good sex with someone who becomes a boyfriend you really like fucking.

I don't really trust men when they claim every woman they've ever hooked up with wanted a relationship because I've had too many hookups assume I wanted a relationship when that was objectively untrue. A lot of you just think any woman who is fucking you and being nice to you wants to marry you. Nah.

UpbeatInsurance5358 · 2025-01-20T20:14:28+00:00

I often had hookups because I was horny and I enjoyed sex.

themoderation · 2025-01-20T22:50:09+00:00

I think they’re just desperately searching for one man who can give them an orgasm.

JustGeminiThings · 2025-01-20T20:45:00+00:00

I mean, not all women date with "intention." For some of us it's casual until it's not. And for some of us that works, especially if we don't have big, definite life goals that we want no matter what. Women can go with the flow too.

AngelEyes_9 · 2025-01-20T23:51:12+00:00

I don’t think that many women sleep with guys simply for fun. Then just hop onto the next guy. Most women aren’t like that and most men aren’t like that.

TLDR: The majority of hookups and fwbs that occur are women trying to get men out of their league.

Absolutely don't agree. Yes, women sometimes try to sneak their way to a relationship through early sex but most hook-ups occur because women are simply attracted to a man they want to get sexual with. This "de-sexualization" of women (oh, they rarely have sex without being emotionally invested) is what society and yes, mostly women, brainwashed you to believe. When women say that they rarely do hook-ups out of fun, I understand – it's just a 1001th attempt to preserve the "purity" illusion. But when men say it, it's a bit sad. Wakep up.

EDIT: It's actually refreshing to see many replies from women that for once decribe the reality.

MasterAd6260 · 2025-01-21T01:29:25+00:00

This is some stupid logic. Read your first sentence and you realize most women and men have other options right?

Especially if they met on a dating app, or in a social place where there’s more than one person around.

I find it hard to believe that men are taking out unattractive, overweight, 50 yo single moms out because they would be the only ones that don’t have other options.

Any man that has a cell phone, or a car to get to a public place to meet other people also has other options.

EetinAintCheetin · 2025-01-20T19:26:47+00:00

Let me tell you something. Women want the same thing that guys want. They want to have fun and not have it cost them anything, like their reputation, being judged or being shamed for it. You have no idea how women behave when they don’t think anyone is looking or when they consider you a safe, non judgmental guy.

Of course women want to hook up with players. Why would they hook up with a loser nice guy instead of the guy who knows his way around a vagina? Duh.

OwnedIGN · 2025-01-21T10:34:42+00:00

I’m starting to believe the average age of this is 17.

Yes, OP, women want the attractive guys. No, they do not want a mediocre man. Yes, they are willing to risk more for a higher prize. No, they are not willing to settle for less.

Outside_Memory5703 · 2025-01-21T15:22:03+00:00

If I hookup, it’s to get sex first, just like a man

And l, like most women, want to do it way, way less than a man

All else follows from that

TopShelfSnipes · 2025-01-20T19:05:19+00:00

In my experience, there are two ways of doing things, and both can work if both partners are receptive:

High initial attraction, buildup to sex early on with an undefined dynamic and few labels. The sex becomes an excuse to see each other (situationship/unspoken FWB) and spend time together doing things other than sex, which then becomes the basis for a relationship when they both realize they like spending time together, one asks for boyfriend/girlfriend, and the other agrees.
Moderate initial attraction, both partners clearly interested on paper, but the tension takes time to build. They do platonic activities together, and gradually initiate physical contact working towards sex someday, even if it requires a little bit of waiting. If both partners wait to define the relationship as boyfriend/girlfriend first before sex, it's because they are BOTH on the same page about that. If both partners view good sex as the final hurdle to cross over from dating to boyfriend/girlfriend status, then that ALSO works if they are BOTH on the same page about that.

Any situation where there is an imbalance in desired arrangement and/or expectations isn't going to work for a relationship. For #1 - They can continue to have sex/be casual if both are down for that and hope something sparks, or for #2 - they can continue to date if both are down for that and hope something sparks. If not, they're not compatible.

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VariationLiving4963 · 2025-01-20T22:47:32+00:00

As a guy who has actually hooked up with a lot of women. Some women do get attached afterwards. I think what happens is the woman judges if you’re going to be loyal to her or not.

Women have sex with men they think are hot. They date men they think will commit. Sometimes they continue to hook up while getting another guy to commit and pay for everything for them. It’s a sad world we live in.

It’s even worse for guys that don’t know this. They fall in love with women who use them and it can break them. I always made sure I wasn’t sleeping with a cheating woman because I would never want a man to go through that pain.

Conscious-Truth-7685 · 2025-01-21T16:50:49+00:00

I mean, I'm an average dude and had a harem of women at one point. That aside, the straight-up hookups I've ever had weren't due to dates. Usually, when someone wants to hook up, they'll just say, hey, you trying to fuck. To be clear, most dates I've ever been on ended with sex but that was never the intent of the date, and most of those dates resulted in short - to long-term relationships. The point is that all this brainwrot and speculating about motives and intentions is shit people make up in their heads based on experiences they've never or have infrequently had. Time and time again, this just shows one of the many issues people and dudes in general who populate spaces like this have. Instead of going out and experiencing how life and relationships are, they just want to postulate about what those things look like. These thoughts and ideas are generally deplorable at best, and they prevent them from ever getting to the first step because no one will touch people who think like this with a 100 ft pole.

Downtown_Cat_1745 · 2025-01-22T03:03:47+00:00

But also women should be immediately sexually available or men will lose interest, but also being a virgin after age 25 is bad and indicates nobody wants you, but also committed relationships hold no benefit for men

Title	When Women Hookup They Are Playing a Bad Numbers Game
Author	InitialPaths989
Upvotes	8
Comments	143
Date	January 20, 2025 6:45 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1i5xjxe/when_women_hookup_they_are_playing_a_bad_numbers/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/when-women-hookup-they-are-playing-a-bad-numbers.1541703 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541703

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