For RedPill Women: What made you RedPill?

leosandlattes · 2025-02-14T04:27:30+00:00

There are very few of us here who are Red Pill Women. And I even think there's some confusion on what RPW actually is; some people - including women - think it's for women who want to be trad wives (?), but that's not really accurate. It's for women who believe in the red pill descriptive (male/female nature and sexual strategies), and based on this develop strategies and advice for women to obtain a mutually beneficial relationship that satisfies both female and male nature. For obvious reasons we don't advocate for getting into relationships with Red Pill men, at least the ones who want to plate spin. Their goals are very different from ours.

To that point I know there are many women here who do agree with the red pill descriptive, but they just flair themselves purple pill because there are specific things that appear in red pill that understandably don't sit well with a lot of women. For me personally, they don't really affect whether I consider myself red pill or not, so I've just flaired myself red pill.

Now for your questions:

I stumbled upon RPW (and later FDS and Vindicta) when I was in my early 20s and in the middle of a self-improvement journey (not dissimilar to the one TRP advocates for men). Back then I would say I leaned somewhere between red and pink pill, but ultimately my dislike for the tone used in FDS won out, and RPW seemed more in line with what I was looking for and what made sense with my intuitive world view.

Part of the reason I'm drawn to pill spaces is because patterned human behavior fascinates me. RPW has also worked out in my relationships and romantic life. I vetted well, my boyfriend and I both try to make each other happy, and we are happy. It’s also helped me understand myself and self-reflect on why I do certain things and what I need out of a relationship.

My parents raised me very conservative, but by the time I was on RPW I was very liberal. RPW itself doesn't tell women to lower themselves or limit themselves to find a man, so it didn't and still doesn't conflict with my social and political beliefs.

Recently I've come to some self-realization that lib fem isn't something I can subscribe to anymore, mostly because of the inconsistency in certain beliefs. I’ve also become skeptical of social feminism and whether it carries any real meaning or utility.

I often joke that rad fem is the only acceptable form of feminism, even if I don't 100% agree with it. And it unironically agrees with much of men and male nature that's stated within the red pill, though the end conclusion is very different from RPW. Sometimes I think one of these days I'll finally see the most horrible take I'll ever see from a man, and it'll push me right over the edge into rad fem, lol.

In this subreddit specifically, people seem to either really agree with me or really disagree with me, both men and women. It hasn't affected me much on here, and it's not like I talk about this stuff in real life either. I'll give my advice when asked, or when a girl friend asks me what I think of dating, but the topic doesn't come up much.

OrganicAd5450 · 2025-02-14T06:15:34+00:00

I was originally flared as purple-pill but realized that red-pill was more appropriate, so I changed it.

I realized a long time ago that the mainstream narrative on most things is not to be trusted but have not applied it to gender in a conscious way until relatively recently. I think the gender red pill on the male side can be often quite dangerous and toxic, even if it's an inevitable response to feminism, so I am wary of it, but I still share a lot of their beliefs and am surely a lot more red pill than blue pill. And subs like r/marriedredpill and r/redpillwomen have a lot of wisdom to share, even if i find some of their views objectionable. I do hope that one day we move beyond this nonsense to something better, something resembling noble masculinity, and that women no longer have to choose between toxically masculine and effeminate men.

I was raised very conservative but then rebelled and became very liberal. It was a long process of awakening that brought me back to conservative values. In some ways, I am still very liberal.

As for gender, I tried the more egalitarian relationships but found them dry and boring. I realized that whenever I became more feminine and my partner became more masculine, I felt excited and alive: it was the source of true romance and passion. One day, I consciously adopted this ideal and, I guess, took the red pill on gender. I think on a less conscious level I have been redpilled my whole life, I just didn't realize it.

Pola_Lita · 2025-02-14T07:45:11+00:00

In the context of this community, the only real woman on woman debate comes from RPW.

So RPW display a lower In-Group bias than BP women.

Are you saying that RPWs tend to argue with other RPWs more here than BP women argue with other BPs?

How did you come to this conclusion and how does that demonstrate in-group bias, please?

Werevulvi · 2025-02-15T13:32:30+00:00

I was purple pill until kinda recently, because I agreed kinda equally with both red and blue pill. I was never really a feminist but started considering myself anti-feminist back in 2017 when that was a hot topic on youtube. But I was still quite liberal on many points. So to answer some of your questions, my parents are the old classic liberals, and although we rarely discuss politics I get the impression that they are centrist and don't think either gender has it worse or better than the other. They're non-traditionalist in the sense that my mom has always been very masculine (wears men's clothes, hates makeup and long hair, had a career as a train driver, etc) and thus taken upon herself many of the traditionally masculine relationship roles, although she was also a stay at home mom for a short time when I and my sister were very young. My dad has always been the breadwinner though, and also is quite masculine.

So basically I was raised by two masculine parents who always rejected traditional gender roles, and tried to raise me as a tomboy as well. This sorta made me rebel with hyperfemininity from an early age, and made it hard for me to see what feminism says, that femininity is oppressive, forced on women, etc. I always kinda felt the opposite, that my femininity was suppressed. And I think this might be a big reason why I now, when I finally start listening to what I want and believe deep down, feel drawn to classic femininity both in my personal life and in relationship roles. And why I feel it's in my nature to be feminine, and that there's nothing wrong with that.

But throughout my teens and 20's I was kinda just floating around everywhere with my views and didn't really know what I wanted.

But now in my 30's my views have shifted quite a lot due to breaking away more and more from political correctness and trying to figure out what matters to me regardless of what's popular. I'm on a massive self-improvement journey and this includes my attitude and view of men and dating in general. I've been consuming a lot more conservative and red pill media in recent years, willingly exposing myself to views that feels triggering or upsetting to challenge why it makes me feel that way. Breaking out of my comfort zone, I guess you could call it.

And part of that was joining this sub. When I first got here I was very angry and felt like the red pill was just massively misogynistic, but over time I started agreeing more and more with the red pillers here. I still don't like ideas such as plate spinning or even passport bros, but what was being said about male and female differences and having complementary roles, etc, started feeling less hostile and more simply truthful in a neutral sense. And the more I asked myself "what can I bring to the table" in relationships, the more I started liking the idea that hey, maybe I'd actually enjoy cooking and cleaning and being more of a housewife type of woman.

Basically over time I've been slowly shedding this anger and feeling like I had to be like men to be valuable, which was partly instilled in me by my parents. Because I lacked a feminine role model I had to learn all that by myself later on, and it's been a rough ride learning things that conflicted with my world view that was ultimately harmful for me. Because I really learned it the hard way that I can't be like men (I'm a detransitioner, meaning I tried to literally become a man, and it failed spectacularly) yet I hated how wpmen are viewed in society, but did not find the answers I needed in feminism.

So I was really lost for a while, but I hope now I'm finally starting to find myself, in the most unlikely place possible: traditional femininity and traditional values, and re-directing all that envy I had tiwards men into simply loving and appreciating men instead. To love masculine men instead of trying to become one. It's clearly not what my mother wanted for me, or what feminism wants for me, but it's what I want and need for myself.

How this has affected my relationship with other women is... mostly negatively, to probably no one's surprise. I get called a "pick me" and "handmaiden" and told that I have "internalized misogyny" on a regular basis, and I often feel like I can't say what I truly think in women's spaces. Trying to make friends with other women is difficult. I feel like I can't speak freely with my mother and sister either, which is harsh because I was never really close with my dad, although nowadays I might have more in common with him than I used to.

All in all I end up keeping my views to myself a lot, and keeping conversations with friends and family non-political as much as possible. I've kinda started really longing for finding a man who's also red pill and/or anti-feminist so I'll have at least just one person I could be truly open with. Because yeah, my shifting views have alienated me a lot, and it does put a strain on me.

Although I live in Sweden and no one is talking openly about anything here. We're a culture of "suck it up", be polite, and walk on egg shells. And I'm sure that affects a lot of people within my community in much the same ways. But still.

ManufacturerFine2454 · 2025-02-15T18:31:43+00:00

There are different interpretations of the red pill which many below me have already given examples on. I tend to have a mix of the beliefs stemming from my religious childhood (I'm more spiritual than religious now) and my own research into the red pill community.

ArkNemesis00 · 2025-02-20T22:48:23+00:00

What made you a RPW? Or were you just born this way? For example: Did you grow up with more brothers? Live in a conservative community? Get burned by bad BP advice? Born with disadvantages that made you need to use different strategies? Get burned by general political correctness? Some other life experience that made you see things differently? And how has this affected your relationship with other women who may be BP or BP leaning?

My family is conservative/trad/religious, boys were nicer to me than girls were, and I'm a romantic. That probably did most of the work. I didn't find TRP/RPW until after I was married and found RPW to be a helpful community. It encourages me to spend a greater proportion of my time considering my partner's POV.

Post-marriage I stopped caring for male friendship and started pursuing/strengthening my female friendships. I wouldn't say I've had many issues but I also don't discuss much politics or RP stuff with other people.

HappyCat79 · 2025-02-14T14:42:10+00:00

I used to be a tradwife/redpilled woman and I had that view due to internalized misogyny.

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Title	For RedPill Women: What made you RedPill?
Author	giveuporfindaway
Upvotes	13
Comments	148
Date	February 14, 2025 2:40 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ip0jpl/for_redpill_women_what_made_you_redpill/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/for-redpill-women-what-made-you-redpill.1543817 https://theredarchive.com/post/1543817

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