Average men don't struggle in dating

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2026-04-21T13:10:06+00:00

No new N count or looks posts. Make your post as a comment in the weekly thread if it’s the applicable topic for this week, otherwise wait until next week.

Hungry_Orange666 · 2026-04-21T11:00:11+00:00

Average guys get girlfriends towards the end of high school or at college/university.

So if 63% of young guys are single, would that mean that majority of men are below average?

Isn't that against definition of "average"?

https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/08/for-valentines-day-5-facts-about-single-americans/

Also it's not for lack of trying:

64 percent of single young men say it’s too difficult to meet people, compared to 50 percent of those in relationships. But even here, half of young men in serious relationships believe finding partners is too difficult today.

https://youngmenresearchinitiative.substack.com/p/are-young-men-over-dating

anonymousppd123123 · 2026-04-21T10:57:42+00:00

"They found that men’s ratings of self-perceived attractiveness were higher than women’s ratings"

You know this isnt inconsistent with women rating the median 50th percentile man as a 2 correct?

GhostXmasPast342 · 2026-04-21T12:30:19+00:00

Average men do struggle, especially in their 40s and 50s.

Meekzzy · 2026-04-21T11:43:16+00:00

Nah the average guy has such a lack of options they fall in love with the person to show them attention.

DriverInitial8305 · 2026-04-21T11:47:05+00:00

This was true 20 yrs ago. Things have drastically changed

Prestigious-Smoke511 · 2026-04-21T12:04:39+00:00

I think the tough part of all of this is just how many people marry their partner early.

So an average guy and an average gal take themselves off the market early on and we don’t see what would have played out had they opted not to. Then they both get chubby and let their finances meld together in a way that makes divorce far more of a pain then just sticking together cause they like each other enough anyway.

If the women here are to be believed, both people would have gone on to have the exact same love life. N partners each. If the men around here are to be believed, the woman would have gone on to get passed around by 75 chads with chiseled torsos and jawlines and the guy would have jerked off to gay porn the rest of his life.

The reality is something way more boring. People don’t really wanna fight with the dating market so they pair off, have some kids, have some bills, and the guys that can’t find a gal bitch, while the gals that kind find a guy turn into the coolest aunt in the history of the planet.

So it looks like guys have it really bad at the bottom but really guys are just hornier so they take their L worse.

Whiskeymyers75 · 2026-04-21T11:25:06+00:00

The flaw in your argument is acting like “4/10 vs 6/10” is objective.

Who decided that? Social media?

Because what’s actually happening is men are being rated against a completely inflated standard, while women are being told they’re above average regardless.

I’ve literally experienced it. Same face, same person. Just heavier. When I was fat, I got ignored by women just as overweight or worse. Now I’m lean and muscular and suddenly I’m “attractive” to all types.

So it’s not just men overestimating themselves. It’s that the baseline for what’s considered an “average man” has been pushed way higher than people want to admit.

Ok_Cook_3098 · 2026-04-21T11:30:54+00:00

Jesus christ lord in heaven

1.

No one is claiming that your average dude is an incel

Like no one,

The average dude has it just much more harder then ever to find a girl, thats it. Thats basicly a strawmen post

2.

Wehre is your proof of anything? You just pick a topic the. A source of a different topic.

Like thats now even a good strawmen

Gemini_zyx · 2026-04-21T11:36:31+00:00

So while I roughly agree im not sure how helpful it is.
When in USA 16% of people say they feel lonlely or isolated ALL or MOST of the time its a huge number of people, even if % wise its not a majority.

Also a report recently showed that sexlessness (not having sex in a year) has skyrocketed. "Sexlessness in the last year rose from 9% for males in 2013-15 to 24% in 2022-23. For females, it rose from 8% to 13 percent."
Not saying having sex is the only imporant factor, of course, but it does show a worrying trend.

I guess my stance is while it might be true for most people its not the lived reality for a huge number of people.

weenieandthebutt · 2026-04-21T12:17:03+00:00

Yeah and if you miss that boat during your high-school or university years, your only other avenue is online dating or other outlets with complete strangers involved. There's no sense of familiarity to work within your favour and your essentially going by looks alone.

Mandino_5 · 2026-04-21T12:23:31+00:00

Nice try. Pathetic attempt.

coochie4sale · 2026-04-21T12:37:49+00:00

69% of people are at a relationship at a given time. A good chunk of the 31% rotate in and out of relationships. You’re right OP.

There’s this funny thing in US economic discourse where everyone believes themselves to be “middle class” - the doctor who makes 400,000 will answer “middle-class” on surveys asked about his class, and the 7-eleven worker on food-stamps will also answer “middle-class”. The result is that the term has been bastardized and doesn’t mean anything anymore. I think average occupies that same space in dating discussion. It means nothing. The average man and woman is whoever the poster wants them to be, a literary device that completely falls apart when you even tease the concept out for a little bit.

I’ve seen people argue that men who don’t hold any form of employment, are unable to hold conversations with people, and don’t go outside are “average”. I’ve seen people argue that the average woman is fielding several date requests at any given time. It’s madness and the lack of actual accuracy makes all these conversations futile.

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Training-Cook3507 · 2026-04-21T11:35:30+00:00

Incorrect. This study shows women are a much harsher judge of men than men are of women. It's very difficult to have an objective standard. Women certainly use more things like makeup to improve their appearance, while men have less options in that area. But men and women usually have the same BMI in every phase of life, with men's BMI being slightly lower.

As far as the average guy outcomes... Dating has changed drastically in the last 15 to 20 years and we won't know how that affects outcomes for another decade or two. What is true though, is that drastically less men are getting married compared to 50 years ago.

ConTrikster · 2026-04-21T11:10:21+00:00

Yea it’s true that men on the internet tied into internet dating politics isn’t the “average” male, in the sense of if they are having serious debilitating issues with getting women at all, they aren’t actually average but below average. The average male isn’t some near virgin incel with social issues. That’s just internet biased men flooding the same area of the internet with a common problem.

The only bone/caveat I’ll throw is that more people are becoming less physically social than prior generations. People do meet online more often than historically. So there is a tad bit of validity with the change of how we interact and date

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2026-04-21T11:31:07+00:00

I asked the men here for a picture of an "average man" and received an image of something so alien to the western eye i was like what is this website anymore. like it was wholly unidentifiable to me.

DiscombobulatedTop8 · 2026-04-21T12:56:42+00:00

The term "average" just means caucasian. In a majority white society, whites do have an easier time dating. They do not know what it's like to be Asian or Indian, which is a completely different reality.

Title	Average men don't struggle in dating
Author	ZealousidealBag5778
Upvotes	1
Comments	91
Date	April 21, 2026 10:45 AM UTC (3 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1srk07o/average_men_dont_struggle_in_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/average-men-dont-struggle-in-dating.1578494 https://theredarchive.com/post/1578494

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