[Q4W] How would it feel if you were rejected for sex the majority of the time?

sublimemongrel · 2018-04-19T14:19:05+00:00

Interesting q OP, but it’s hard for me to say because I’ve never approached a man for just sex. If you mean rejected for anything romantic (which would include sex, eventually), then I’d feel unlovable or like there’s something wrong with me.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2018-04-19T15:50:27+00:00

actually i take back my automod comment. as a realtor at open houses i had to constantly open and approach people like a PUA and face even outright hostile rejection. you get a thick skin

GridReXX · 2018-04-19T14:37:21+00:00

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LSTW1234 · 2018-04-19T15:03:55+00:00

Hard to answer because I don’t approach men for sex but I’m sure it would feel shitty to be constantly rejected. It would make me very insecure. I don’t envy this aspect of the male experience at all. During my brief foray into dating apps I tried Bumble (the app where only women are allowed to initiate conversation) and I hated being in the position of making the first move.

hellothisispotato · 2018-04-19T17:04:09+00:00

It would hurt a lot if I were turned down in my relationship. I'm not bothered by not being approached by other men.

ivegotsomequestions0 · 2018-04-19T20:00:42+00:00

It would feel pretty bad. I'd feel like shit and have to have people tell me to suck it up and improve.

I wouldn't give a crap about no longer being able to get casual sex though, anymore than I'd be sad if the shitty Chinese restaurant on my block, which I only went to once, closed. I'd be upset because it would imply that I could no longer get the actual relationships I want.

sedotta · 2018-04-19T15:42:22+00:00

I don’t approach people just for sex, so if I were to do that and get rejected, I’d think I had it coming for being kind of an asshole. The majority of people don’t want to just be randomly propositioned for sex out of the blue.

Sex isn’t a “commodity” to me, it’s a mutually beneficial activity that I do with another person when they also want to do it with me.

carefreevermillion · 2018-04-19T16:50:19+00:00

As the higher sex drive half of my relationship, you develop a thick skin. It's not meant to be a personal attack, even though it's within the confines of my relationship. I'm more likely to prolong how long I'll go without sex if I act like it's a big deal, because then that puts extra stress on him.

Electra_Cute · 2018-04-19T14:17:39+00:00

If my boyfriend did it I would probably feel unloved and leave, outside of that I would not care.

Mr_Smoogs · 2018-04-19T14:38:29+00:00

Most average women do not get approached very frequently for anything, if they are on apps they get hit up for sex but casual sex is not appealing to many women. It might have an impact on a woman who was approached frequently in the past but is not now. Before apps men mostly hit on the super hot women and ignored everybody else and women survived that. Average people managed to find one another and sort it out.

YesICanWhoopUrAss · 2018-04-19T14:50:58+00:00

The same? I’m old now but was never that hot in my youth. I didn’t and don’t care about Random’s approaching me. I’ve always been the type of girl who put out little sister vibes and ended up dating guys I knew and tricked with my winning personaaaaaaaaality.

Sooooo this wouldn’t impact me (or most non-hotties.)

RockinSocksII · 2018-04-19T14:23:22+00:00

Wouldn't bother me at all. I already know I'm ugly.

PPD-Angel · 2018-04-19T14:35:48+00:00

There's seems to be a lot of haters down voting in this thread (and in general lately). Please remember that down voting is against the rules. Please either engage comments you disagree with or if a comment breaks a rule, report it.

2018-04-19T19:15:00+00:00

Since I am interested in relationships, not just sex, I would rather be rejected than led on. But that's just me.

2018-04-19T20:11:21+00:00

It depends on the context but if I were in a relationship with a guy and he rejected me constantly for sex I would feel really bad and question his attraction towards me.

I probably would never approach guys for just sex, but if I tried to date them and failed over and over, I would readjust my standards until I met some success.

says_harsh_things · 2018-04-19T14:44:04+00:00

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2018-04-19T14:29:40+00:00

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TheGreasyPole · 2018-04-19T15:33:28+00:00

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randomcarrotaf · 2018-04-19T18:56:07+00:00

I am ugly, i get turned down all the time and im NEVER approached either. Pretty normal to me honestly...

yasee · 2018-04-19T19:03:47+00:00

I don't get approached much at this point in my life, but the idea of being rejected sexually by a romantic partner (which has happened before) is unpleasant and painful. I think that's a very different dynamic than getting shot down at a bar, though

Would it bother you that sex is no longer the easy to get commodity of before

No, but it might make me feel undesirable/unattractive and that sucks.

Young_Oryx · 2018-04-19T20:36:30+00:00

Probably shitty. Good thing I'm not a man.

MisterJose · 2018-04-20T05:59:19+00:00

This is a really difficult question for anyone to answer because you don't really know unless you've lived a different life.

pinkgoldrose · 2018-04-20T08:38:30+00:00

I have been rejected in the pass and usually they became my best friends with no awkwardness. I used to like getting friendzoned more than anything else because friendships are fun and easy and I don't require sex.

2018-04-22T04:49:39+00:00

If we're in some inverted world where everything is upside down and where zebras hunt lions and women find a vast percentage of men attractive (and women are the one approaching men) then I guess I would blame the evilz menz for having preferences and not wanting to fuck unattractive people?

nemma88 · 2018-04-19T14:24:41+00:00

With random people it's not really relevant in my remit as I have no desire to have sex with random people.

Naturally in a relationship I feel unhappy, it affects my self esteem after a period of time (You can only rationalize is being a temporary problem for so long) causes reevaluation of the relationship and eventually consider moving on.

I say that from experience.

2018-04-19T17:13:16+00:00

I don't approach randoms for sex so it's hard to imagine. If it were something I really wanted and I saw my friends got rejected far less often, I would probably feel unattractive and sad.

If I were never approached for only sex it would be nice. If I could never get into a romantic relationship it would suck.

If my boyfriend constantly rejected me for sex I'd feel unloved as well as unattractive.

2018-04-19T22:22:40+00:00

It is harder, but there’s a blessing in that. Check out the book “Flow” by Mihalay C. Happiness comes from accomplishment. By working on yourself and learning how to be successful with women, you will feel accomplished, which is infinitely more gratifying than just blatantly getting sexual attention for nothing.

Title	[Q4W] How would it feel if you were rejected for sex the majority of the time?
Author	Jokengonzo
Upvotes	18
Comments	244
Date	April 19, 2018 2:15 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/8dey71/q4w_how_would_it_feel_if_you_were_rejected_for/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-how-would-it-feel-if-you-were-rejected-for-sex.262828 https://theredarchive.com/post/262828

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