What do you feel when someone cheats

2ChainZinMedSchool · 2015-08-18T17:01:10+00:00

cut all contact, delete her number, delete anything that reminds you of her. throwaway everything belongs to her outside, better yet burn it. Stop thinking about her, every time you notice your mind go off tangent about her, think about something else. Go see other girls, fuck something else. Welcome to the red pill. Next time screen bitches before you let them in emotionally. Once a slut, always a slut. Don't let the whore come back, she will bitch and plead.

MattyAnon · 2015-08-18T17:13:43+00:00

always making my girlfriend my top priority.

This triggered her hypergamic "I can do better" instincts, and is why you're feeling so rough. You invested in her rather than yourself, and now you have been left with nothing.

In future: the girl comes fifth after you, your family, your friends, and your dog if you have one. This way when they stray, cheat, etc you have a life still. Investing in a woman is a very very bad strategy.

You are feeling angry, betrayed, sad. In short you are grieving for what once was. You are also feeling like you've put an awful lot in, and gotten nothing out. In fact kicked in the teeth for your efforts. This is the "my investment came to nothing" feeling. Sadly your commitment put you in the BB category. Consider this a very very light warning about women and how they treat long term boyfriends and husbands.

You have to ditch her, or open the relationship and YOU start to see other girls. (And actually do it). Standing for this is a big negative against you, and she's already given you the biggest disrespect of all.

No matter what you say, no matter what she says, she's lost respect for you and it will happen again. Fast forward ten years and she's saying "oh honey, I forgot to tell you I cheated again last week" and you're saying "oh baby, you know you agreed to stop doing this" and she's saying "yes of course, but you know how I get when I've had half a vodka martini, and I promise not to do it yet again".

Don't forgive her because she confessed or because you think you need her.

The_BeardedGentleman · 2015-08-18T16:47:10+00:00

Its going to be completely different person to person. I personally wouldn't give a fuck. I stopped attaching myself to women in 2006. If shes fucking someone else, good on him, peace bitch its her loss.

Welcome to the Red Pill, you need it.

RememberingAlpha · 2015-08-18T17:35:53+00:00

Its not easy man. I got cheated on 5 months ago, and still struggle with it. Somedays I'm ok, other days, like yesterday, I'll remember a certain detail and it makes my blood boil and I'm ready to break things.

Its the worst form of rejection. You were sold a lie growing up. You were the ideal boyfriend with the promise of an ideal life, only to find out it yields the most un-ideal of results. You feel broken, cheated, and outraged.

Realzing that to women, men are just opportunities, and for them its not personal. For us, its all personal. All the other guy needs to be is a little better looking, a little wealthier, and representative of a less tied down situation and she won't hesitate.

You're gonna be ok, or at least thats what I keep telling myself. Its a hard truth to swallow, but all women are like this. You'll find women in relationships are often easier than women outside of them. I'm really sorry man, I know its the worst feeling in the world. Like I said, five months and few lays later and I'm still pretty broken up over it.

All you can do is lift weights and spin plates. Whether you like it or not the sun is going to come up tomorrow and she won't be there. How you grow from this is on you.

Best advice that I never took and wish I had, cut her out of your life. Block, delete, and erase her from your life. It makes it easier. Don't try to be friends. Thats like coming home from school and your mom says "well, the dog died but you can keep it if you want to"

babydocnorman · 2015-08-18T18:09:52+00:00

Welcome to the RP bro. Hopefully you learned a couple of valuable lessons:

Wifing up a girl and passing up pussy in your teens and early 20s is insane.
Semi attractive woman away from home for an extended period + alpha males in the vicinity = someone is getting banged, especially if alcohol is available. This applies to girls weekends away, summer camps and sales meetings

Your GF actually did you a favor. Consider this a wake-up call.

jvosh1 · 2015-08-18T19:43:39+00:00

Welcome to the red pill.

One year from now that bitch will be nothing but a distant memory.

This is the best thing that has ever happened to you, you just dont know it yet.

slay_it_forward · 2015-08-18T17:29:40+00:00

It's cliche advice, but this too shall pass. Try to distract yourself as much as possible. The sick in the stomach feeling is common. It will go away but you need to go no contact to let the wounds heal.

Game some new girls. Not to find a replacement but to have fun and realize there are lots of other girls in the world.

Good connections can be rare but you'll have plenty more.

xkcd_puppy · 2015-08-18T19:05:41+00:00

It's a bit difficult seeing a new guy getting unplugged right before my eyes throughout this thread. Brings back all those feels I had when I was getting unhooked from the matrix. All the lessons to learn through pain and anguish. All the new things to experience in life. All the freedom to gain. Then one day you wake up and decide to stop coddling your fragile ego.

Damn, now I'm really understanding what Neo was feeling and thinking in that scene.

bl33dingr3d · 2015-08-18T20:41:20+00:00

Hey man, you're experiencing something brutal, psychologically. I feel for you, as I've been there. You're going to see a lot of comments with a hard edge, saying "cut all contact, fuck other bitches, burn her things, kick her out, etc."

I'm sorry to say that this is all valid advice. Here's the cold hard truth about cheating:

If you forgive her and take her back, making her promise to be faithful forever and ever, then the slow death spiral of your relationship will begin. She'll automatically lose respect for you at a subconscious level. Why shouldn't she? A strong, high-value man would NOT tolerate that shit. Not for a second. But a needy Beta would.
Don't take it personally. When she cheated, she was focusing on her "feelz" at the time and completely disregarded how it would affect you because for women: their feelings and hypergamy absolutely STEAMROLL their logic and reasoning. Women are horrible at long-term planning. They'll toss a 20 year marriage with little kids just for the chance to FEEL something exciting (Chad's cock). 20 years of homebuilding and family development GONE! That's how brutal female sexual behavior can be.
In the long term, you'll realize that this was a painful, but absolutely CRUCIAL part of your own personal growth. You'll now look at women through a new lens. You'll walk into relationships with your eyes wide open. You'll put YOU first, and women as an interchangeable part of your life. You'll, in short, swallow the jagged, broken-glass filled Red Pill and will be better for it.

Short-term: you're going to feel fucking horrible. My advice is to gut it out and to focus on small victories. Read up on Depression (there's a good recent post on TRP if you search for it). Take care of yourself physically, and above all: don't isolate yourself socially. Lean on your closest family members and friends for support, it will be hard to do at first but you'll find that they'll help get you out of being depressed a lot quicker.

Good luck, man.

abdada · 2015-08-18T16:44:05+00:00

She didn't throw away anything that was perfect for her.

Somewhere, at some point, you got comfortable.

You stopped exciting her.

You gave up your path to focus on the "US" (her) path.

She didn't cheat, per se. She felt like you cheated her out of the man she wanted and replaced it with a boy she didn't want.

Look deeper at your recent months. I bet you'll find a dozen mistakes where you lost frame to her shit tests.

AFPJ · 2015-08-18T18:09:26+00:00

What do you feel when someone cheats

Once I found out a 2-yr ex (LTR) fucked a guy I work with - he didn't know it. Kicked her out, bought him a beer and was fucking with the guy by telling him what happened. His face turned blue, it was great. He thought I was gonna kill him. So, let's see: what exactly did I feel? The tedium of throwing out a few shirts and bras and shit that she kept at my place along with a beer buzz. It's OK to appreciate women, like them, etc: it's not OK to be dependent on them.

While Briffault's Law is true, women aren't dumb; when led with an iron fist they are aware of the fact that what's in their best interest, if they want you in their life, is remaining in your good grace - only when your LTR comes to this conclusion do you get to skip the bullshit and enjoy her feminine side. There will no longer be a conflict of interest & you will be able to enjoy a mutually beneficial relationship. She'll still try to make silly gambits for power: crush them.

Hoes dumb enough to fuck someone else actually believe they can branch swing, they think they can do better. Kick them out - let them find out; if you want, get a few delicious "take me back" fucks / blowjobs before no-contacting.

BetterBadIdeas · 2015-08-18T18:51:56+00:00

Dump the bitch like a sack of shit and don't put the next one on a pedestal. Remember: if she's not working for your approval, you're already fucked.

thisismyredpillaccou · 2015-08-18T17:37:40+00:00

Hi, I made a new account just to reply to this, I've lurked here a long time.

The exact same thing happened to me few years ago when my girlfriend cheated on me and I felt a lot of the same things you were feeling. Everyone thought we had a fantastic relationship and I thought I was doing everything correct. This was ultimately the catalyst for me finding The Red Pill and I understand everything that happened now.

At the time it sucked, I'll admit I cried too but at the end of the day all you can do is go on. You're a man, you can't sit around and be depressed forever.

Some specific things that helped me at the time were making a playlist of really happy, upbeat songs and listening to that all the time, starting to hang out with my male friends more (only males, no females) and I was doing martial arts at the time so hitting a bag or pads helped get the anger out.

I also cut all contact with her and got rid of everything she gave me. All her cards and letters and stuff I set on fire which kind of helped with the anger and was pretty symbolic that everything was over.

I'll be completely honest, it took probably a good two months for me to get completely back to normal but I got back to normal and this was before I discovered the Red Pill.

After discovering the Red Pill I can offer the following advice too:

Improve yourself. Get to the gym and lift weights, start your own side business, read books, start that hobby you always wanted to do.

Don't take this personally. Learn about hypergamy, read everything in the sidebar. You'll be angry at first but that anger will pass and you'll see exactly why everything happened as it happened.

Make yourself the priority. You said that you made your girlfriend your top priority and this was one of your mistakes. I know, I did the exact same thing. I read in a book once a parable about two people stuck in the desert. You brought enough water for yourself to survive and get out but the other person didn't. You can either keep the water for yourself and get out of the desert and live or you can share the water with the other guy and you both die. Saving it for yourself is not selfish. You can't help anyone else if you're dead.

I can't emphasize enough though that you will get through this. Learn everything you can about the Red Pill and you'll be in much better shape.

Things will get better. Now I'm in an LTR with an amazing girl who treats me way better than my cheating ex ever did. Plus the relationship is way better now that I understand the Red Pill. I want to say she's a unicorn but I know, AWALT and I'm vigilant. Plus if things go wrong this time I know there are other girls out there.

It sounds like you're still quite young and you are incredibly lucky to have found the Red Pill now. You still have your best years ahead of you and you're full of potential and you can do literally anything you want.

Good luck and welcome to the real world.

Edit: saw 2ChainZinMedSchool's comment and he's completely right. In the future you'll look back and think thank God I didn't do something stupid like marry that girl. And yes, no matter what do not take her back.

One more edit: also, she's now started sleeping with a bunch of other guys and it's going to mess her up later. She'll reach the wall around 30 and suddenly be alone and wondering where all the good men have gone and why she can't find a good LTR partner. If it helps you can also use this sort of as pre-revenge to maybe make you feel a bit better now but once you internalize the Red Pill you probably won't care.

WidmerBeer · 2015-08-18T18:27:46+00:00

You feel betrayal from the person who you 'believed' was supposed to be the most loyal. However experiencing reality is much different than a fairy tale, isn't it? "These ho's ain't loyal".

Women going on a trip and fucking someone else isn't anything new. Our culture's mentality about infidelity is that it's 'no big deal' and that it's 'empowering', not to mention the lack of shame on those who defile their own integrity. Trust me when I say this, it has happened to the majority of men. The difference between you and them is how you handle it.

You learned: HAMSTER AWALT

Welcome to the club. It happens to us all, even if the circumstances are different.

kamenr · 2015-08-18T21:10:19+00:00

Look, it's fucking unfair that Santa Claus doesn't exist. He should exist, but he doesn't. The sooner one finds that out, the better.

Be grateful you find this out so young, rather than being divorce raped at age 45.

Now go read the fucking sidebar.

therealistcliche · 2015-08-18T18:45:21+00:00

An Alpha doesn't cry. Rest of your story is pretty beta full of oneitis.

anonymousapple111 · 2015-08-18T17:58:09+00:00

There's a reason so many artists like Bruno Mars,Adam Levine,Enrique,Timberlake and similar artists have been writing songs about this shit since times immemorial.Lyrics of those songs are along the lines of "You were my sun"," I was ready to give you my name","I would catch a grenade".Women are fucking selfish and hypergamy is a cruel bitch.Sometimes, breakups are worse than their death.Because she's alive,happy and moved on and you can't believe that she doesn't even feel sad.

Don't worry, it'll pass.Just don't get depressed and fall into a negative spiral.

Drogba006 · 2015-08-18T23:17:09+00:00

Now you either leave the bitch or you can downgrade her from "girlfriend" back to "hoe".

That sucks though man.

fastball21 · 2015-08-19T14:15:39+00:00

Julius Caesar's wife fooled around on him, alpha's no defence against infidelity. There is none.

The one thing a woman can do that a man can't is have children. That's her primary biological imperative, it's the base reason for most of her behaviours in a relationship. You are not, never have been, and never will be #1 with a woman. She comes first, her uterus comes second, everything else is scenery. She prefers good looking scenery (nice looking guy, nice house, nice car, nice furniture), but the scenery is interchangeable.

I was hoping someone on here had a similar situation and could help me.

You will burn inside for a month, then have two more months of a dull ache. After that, you'll never feel this way again. Consider this experience an immunization shot. If you need something for your stomach pain, sit in a dark room for a couple days and listen to this about 40 or 50 times.

I've rejected the advances of multiple girls, always making my girlfriend my top priority.

You gave something to her that doesn't belong to her. You're always to be the top priority of your life. If you get married someday, have children, you still must remain #1 in your life. You cannot take on the responsibilities of a wife and children if you cannot provide and take care of yourself first. You always come first. What you did was hand something to your girlfriend that wasn't hers. She did not recognize the gift. She can't comprehend it, didn't know how to treat it, and doesn't respect it. Your pain is a result of your error, not hers. Expect nothing from others and you can never be disappointed. Expect nothing from others because you do not need anything from others. It's nice to have love and affection returned to you, but it's not necessary for your own happiness and peace of mind. That feeling of true inner peace comes from the place that knows you can become any kind of human being you wish to be.

marowitt · 2015-08-19T10:34:05+00:00

This is the start of a downward spiral man.

My Ex cheated on me after we were 7 years together, lived together for 5 years, during all this time I was God and Beyond for her.

But eventually I got a job where I spend more time at the office then at home, the relationship went cold and she ended up cheating.

I thought that was a one time deal and gave her another chance, another chance for her to stab me in the back again.

The second time I found out I just ended it there and then.

My world collapsed. I spend the next half a year in a drunken haze. But I eventually picked myself up and moved on.

It's been 2 years since then, she still sends me texts and emails telling me that she is sorry and that she loves me, haven't bothered replying to any of them.

TL:DR End it now Bro before it gets out of control and you get hurt even more

AWALT

urWildcard · 2015-08-18T19:41:45+00:00

Honest to god, I lost respect in her more than anything.

Post cheating, the relationship went on for another year. I want to see how it would play out comparing TRP notes against her actions and words. This ain't a circlejerk, but shit the signs are real once you know how to read the map.

Here's one specific example: I broke off with her two months ago, over a dispute where she straight up cancelled our future travel trip to destination A, and save her vacation money to go destination B with her friend. Naturally I asked who, she said it was a friend. I pressed more before mentioned it was with guy old friend. Given our personal context I said if you go, it's over. It wasn't a threat but was merely a due diligence to warn. 5 mind later she then said the guy was bringing his gf, along with her bbf, and would have invited me too if i had given her the "chance."

Fuck that. If I had respect for my partner, I would word my sentences tactfully because I care. And because I care, I'd be smarter with my choices. And thus my conclusion at least in those moments, is that she's a selfish bitch.

I broke up later that night over a different yet similarity issue.

She recently came back from destination B, and joined our mutual friend's birthday celebration. Post party we talked for a bit, had hugs but I didn't like her advances when she wanted to get closer. (Also wasting time sitting on a bench not talking about positives but was just being boring) It was past midnight and I had work the next day so I said come to watch a movie or I am going home. She pulled out her phone with the usual routine, not paying attention to my needs, walking ahead/behind as she remains undeceive about flagging a cab. I then grabbed a cab, got home and received a phone call from her crying about how much she misses me. I restated everything to her again from the source of our old problems my needs and how you fucking move on - stay as friends, have a good time, date who you want, spent 2-3 yrs time to grow and we'll be together when we do. She hung up out of disagreement.

20mins later i received an essay on expressing she deeply loves me, she's ready to get back together but will never grow enough to meet my standards and a bunch of excuses and sorry talks. I spent another 20mins restating again that she lacks the trust to make things work, that she looks to take away rather then to add to the group. Anyhow, the convo ended with her finally accepting that I ain't ready to be with her, and I will at the minimum continue to support her as a genuine friend.

Her respond? "I am not sure I am ready." Yup, I called her out in that her love is cheap. She claim to love "me" but can't make this relationship of 3 years into a genuine friendship, And she's again proving me right, that she doesn't want to do what it takes / necessary to secure what's important to her - her love, me, and whatever else that is important is more out convenience than mustering that dedication and pursue to make things happen.

Here's the tldr: - I paid my price, but not in any traumatic sense because I was aware and had a goal. I wanted to move forward by seeing how the game would play out. You won't regret if you pledge to stay aware. - Throughout the year I had lost more and more respect for her as a person. It's true, but even so I would never tell her this. It's my personal choice to be her protector when I can. Objectively though, people like her won't recover from a blow like this. Dating or not, keep your charities separate but really invest in those who can naturally turn criticism into new opportunities. This one dwells, and it drives me nuts. I think respect is a good angle to use as decision anchor. It's clear, and tells you all you need to know at the core. - The only way to add while subtracting is take away the "'t" in can't. Girls be girls, people be people. Take if one must, but at least be smart to understand this principle. It's for longevity. And without this whether in work, love or life you'll continually be dragged into endless crap all just because, others can't commit to their own personality, choices and goals. Fuck that always be guessing / floating kind of life; drama can stay on tv.

Nothing_Gazes_Back · 2015-08-18T21:20:36+00:00

Say you work on a painting. If you're any good that means you've spent long nights practicing your technique and you have studied the greats. You spend days, weeks, whatever, working on this beautiful painting and you put a little but of yourself into it. This painting is a reflection of where you are in life. From the quality of the materials to your level of skill, this painting is a snapshot of who you are at the time of its creation.

Your dog prances through the room, loving life, happy tail wagging, and he knocks over and destroys your painting that you've poured your heart into. That's what it feels like when your SO cheats.

You can't be mad at the girl. She has about as much control over herself as the painting has to keep itself from falling. You can't be mad at the fun, happy dude that banged her. He is just doing his thing and getting his. Nonetheless, the painting is every bit as ruined as your relationship is, and you're an idiot if you think it's worth fixing when the world is filled with blank canvases and hot chicks.

It's not the end of the world, but it sucks. You'll move on. In the meantime, throw that ruined painting in the trash and kick it to the curb and forget about it.

That's how I see it, anyway. Hopefully I explained that in a way that is coherent.

Throwaway9665 · 2015-08-18T21:42:24+00:00

I don't own her, so she cannot cheat. She doesn't own me, so I can't cheat either. Easy.

J_Dizzle1000 · 2015-08-18T22:09:35+00:00

I'm telling you this from a position of still having feelings for my ex. We broke up almost a year ago. She didn't cheat or anything, but after the break up, I went full on beta retard. This strung out for like 4 months trying to get back together and the head games it entailed.

It's best if you just cut it off. It's hard man, but you need to remove her from all social media, get rid of her number and just let it go. I often think of my ex while I'm on this jiurney, but it will get easier with time.

Start seeing other women and focus on building your life. That's what I did and my life has turned around. Slowly but surely I've started getting my life back on track and if my ex were to come up to me today and ask to get back together, I would have to say no. As much as I'd want to, you have to learn to put yourself on the pedestal and remember that you're better than that.

You're fuckin god's gift to the world, so fucking live it man.

Tired333 · 2015-08-19T04:18:12+00:00

Cut all contact, Remove all belongings. Dont worry about what she thinks shes a whore. Go get start spinning plates, fucking around casually and move on. sorry this happened to you we've all been in a situation like this or something stressful. Good luck and cheers.

Moldy_Gecko · 2015-08-19T07:48:21+00:00

She's young, you've had her since High School, and you definitely don't sound like the "Alpha guy". She cheated, it's expected. If you've been on TRP for any amount of time, you should know better. Don't forget AWALT. Best thing you can do is next her and get some plates. Use whatever you're feeling to lift harder.

The only reason you feel this way is because you put her on a pedestal. Time to take her off and cut ALL contact.

YoungRedOne · 2015-08-19T12:47:27+00:00

Dude she could've cheated ANY TIME she wanted and there is NOTHING YOU can do about it. That's just life, it's a mindset that you're gonna to have to get used to.

Nebulose11 · 2015-08-19T15:26:32+00:00

Next.

There is no recourse for this woman. If you take her back you take back all the chads she is going to fuck in the future. Enjoy your cucking.

Leave her or leave yourself.

needsomehalpls · 2015-08-20T10:52:34+00:00

You call yourself alpha, yet you can say that she cheated in you and still refer to her as your girlfriend

Dr_HoaxArthurWilmoth · 2015-08-19T01:34:26+00:00

If you were kinda "alpha" you wouldn't be here crying about your weakness over getting cheated on. Welcome to AWALT.

Take the time to learn what "alpha" really is. It's not you or this post.

beltwaytr · 2015-08-18T18:29:14+00:00

It's unfortunate and I think we have all at some point have been in your situation. Adding on to what others have already said what you are feeling in a mixed bad, but what is important is why. It's a revelation that what you were raised to believe is a total farce.

The fairy tale relationship doesn't actually exist, especially in today's hook up culture. You must understand no matter how sweet and innocent AWALT. They swing to the next best thing at any given time. It's the very reason marraige, LTR's, and oneitis is looked down on in this sub.

Sure we have some men here that "feel" they are safe from reality but at some point it comes to bite them in the ass. If you have to be in a relationship you keep them at arms reach to protect yourself, you never make them your top priority, and make it known they can be replaced easily.

What you are doing now is wasting time and energy on the average woman. Her behavior should not be a surprise, especially if you lurk on this sub.

Profdiddy · 2015-08-18T19:45:40+00:00

Honestly. Nothing but it has been a long time. That heart break you are feeling will pass son. It may get worse for a time but one day you will wake up just fine. Remember, cheating is more a reflection of the cheaters character than your own deficits. Now you have Tim to develop all of those cool hobbies that she took away from.....

ertugyigit92 · 2015-08-18T19:58:39+00:00

Bail out ASAP , dont explain anything. Dont try again , dont talk to her again. Move on , improve yourself and dont accept her existence ( just ignore her.) I know its hard , but there ıs nothıng else to do.

doveenigma13 · 2015-08-18T21:22:08+00:00

You can feel whatever you feel. Pain, anger, sadness, etc.

All she should feel is her shit outside for her to pick up. Show her nothing.

My wife cheated on me and that was the only thing that worked for me. Be a stone when you talk to her or see her.

the_next_move · 2015-08-18T22:02:14+00:00

OP, no one here can deny that pain inside... cool lyric eh?

I suggest DOING something positive and completely unrelated to your current situation. Pick up a new hobbie, dive into your work or study. LEARN something.

When the time is right you will be motivated to find another woman.

Also, take the advice here with a grain of salt. This is just my two $$.

Know yourself, friend.

MentORPHEUS · 2015-08-18T22:27:20+00:00

Lots of excellent advice ITT. Trust us men who have walked this path before you. No matter how badly this all hurts now, once you get the perspective of more time and more intimate lovers through your life, you will look back upon this without the pain and empty loss feeling you are getting today.

Read a bit more about oneitis, and seriously, date and have sex with other women, CASUALLY. Don't start a new love relationship on the rebound, but trust those who say, being with other women will put your head back on straight.

drewdontcare · 2015-08-18T22:55:30+00:00

I feel happy as fuck.

More money saved...more time...and tons of pussy from a variety of good looking girls.....my time is my time...all the while guilt free.

But that's my true nature anyway. I actually feel stuck whenever dating a chick because instinctively I know it's not in my best interest long term hence why I won't fully commit.

Oh, and Fucking her friends. Go fuck her friends

Pancakes1 · 2015-08-19T00:10:16+00:00

a woman being top priority in your life is everything against what redpill stands for.

OKJaded · 2015-08-19T00:14:59+00:00

It will hurt. You will feel sad. Use these feelings to do something positive. Focus on doing something everyday that makes you better than you were the day before. As time passes, you will feel less and less. If you're like me, and I'm not sure if this is good or bad, you'll build a resistance to these feelings and the next time something like this happens you won't really care. You'll just carry on with life as usual.

Hokuto199x · 2015-08-19T00:43:44+00:00

You should have been your own top priority, not her. Don't make a woman your top priority again.

NYCPowerCouple · 2015-08-19T01:27:54+00:00

You know the drill.

If she cheats, eliminate her from your life and move on. I don't care if it was 100yrs, have the balls to cut off this cheating degenerate slut. She's a complete hazard in your life.

Germany, a pretty fit, handsome and 'alpha' guy

Cmon bruh then what's your issue here?

I've rejected the advances of multiple girls, always making my girlfriend my top priority

bangbang

That was your issue. This type of faggy behavior lowers your testosterone, which in turn causes you to act like a cuck fag, which causes you to fail any fitness test she hurls at you, which makes her want to find someone who doesn't act all faggy, etc etc.

You put the pussy on a pedestal, she had no choice but to look down on you, while she looked up at the Chad Thundercock who nailed & bailed her while never cutting off all his bitches, etc., and I bet she ain't even close to a 10 smh

The key to surviving this bullshit that you should have never been in in the first place is to have a consistent flow of quality pussy coming your way. A harem if you wil.

Download tinder and start racking up the hoes since you're handsome. Go look up some guides on how to set up a sick profile and just swipe at everything, and meet with the attractive girls. While doing this, get involved in shit where you can socialize and flex yo game. Hit up parties with the bros, flirt at school, your job, the gym, etc etc etc.

But your main focus right now is to read the sidebar material as well as heartiste chateau/CH material and embed that shit into your brain in order to rack up the bitches, and also to avoid this heartbreak low-T shit in the future.

I wish you the best of luck.

slimcoat · 2015-08-19T02:38:42+00:00

You are feeling the guilt from breaking the third Commandment of Poon:

You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority.

A cardinal rule, and you broke it. It's certainly not the first, and I doubt it will be the last. But hang in there, and welcome to the Red Pill. Keep reading.

musclebound92 · 2015-08-19T03:55:47+00:00

Someone mentioned it before, but be grateful. You are young and got to experience this early It really is an immunization shot. Part of your soul dies but thats a good thing, hehe. But in all reality you dodged a bullet, and learned a major lesson. Every girl you date will probably cheat on you, now you will expect it and it will be so much easier. It allows you the freedom to live more in the moment, when you know what the eventual outcome will be. Like if you have never gone skydiving, you are scared as fuck the first time. The second time, although nervous, your cherry has been popped, and you know whats coming.

Mystik277 · 2015-08-19T05:24:01+00:00

My friend what you are feeling is called "righteous indignation". You are entitled to feel like that. Remember that men are the true romantics, only men can love properly and forever.

It happened to me too, best friends, together for 20 years, two kids. She cheated, AWALT. I went through it as well but with one exception to your story, I never let her see me cry because I swore never to cry over her. You have to stop letting her see your emotion.

As for the feeling you are going through, it does not go away but it changes. Hopefully very soon you will enter the anger phase. That is the way out of your current phase. She is a worthless slut and a betrayor. She is not worth your time or your thoughts. If you cant cut her out of your life I suggest you commence extracting some compensation.

Make her do shit for you and you DO NOTHING for her. Get her to do your cleaning, drive you round. Borrow money off her and dont pay it back. Treat her the way bitches treat beta orbiters. I have been doing this to my ex for nearly two years now. She still comes over and does all my washing and folds all my clothes up and has them ready for me. She makes my bed and cleans my mess. Make her express her guilt with servitude. Do not forgive her, maintain frame and start fucking other women as a matter of urgency.

What you are feeling is what victims ms of crime feel. You did nothing wrong yet you got fucked over. AWALT, try and realise that it is not her that you are mourning, it is also your own misunderstanding of female nature. It is like hating a snake for biting you, they are snakes, that is what they do.

So I really hope some of this helps. You have two ways to deal with the grief phase, wait 12 months, or fuck 12 women. I went for the latter option and found it very satisfactory. I wish you all the best and note that many guys on here have been through what you have. Keep reading red pill, either cut all contact or turn her into your own personal guilt slave. DO NOT FUCK HER, DO NOT FORGIVE HER, DO NOT TAKE HER BACK. She is only fit for servitude.

If this was helpful and you want more tips, let me know.

nzgs · 2015-08-19T06:58:11+00:00

I've never felt any possessiveness towards a partner whatsoever, or taken any interest in her monogamy. It always seemed weird to me that most guys would obsess about it and take it so personally. I only care about myself and getting what I want. I'll flirt with other women and watch porn while in relationships and I couldn't give a shit if my girlfriend does the same.

I've felt this way since my mid-20s.

serious_bs · 2015-08-19T09:04:21+00:00

Tired333, consider this.

I've been reading through the comments and you keep on showing blue pill behaviour, your comments being downvoted and all.

All of us here on TRP understand your situation. Plenty (if not all) of us have been there, we've read about it a thousand times. TRP knows what to do.

By arriving on TRP and, sadly, experiencing what you did, you started swallowing. What will happen? In as few words as possible: your mindset will change. It WILL change (at least if you're a smart guy and swallow the pill).

Why can I say so bluntly that your mindset will change? Because we've seen it over and over, always.

Now there's two versions of yourself: your current self with blue pill mindset, and your future self with red pill mindset. Your future self will be better, stronger, smarter, higher value, more educated, more alpha. He will have a strong, even more attractive mindset.

250.000 people are on TRP. TRP is a discussed philosophy/theory that has been challenged by new users over and over and over and over again. It has been rewritten when arguments were found valid. Over time, theories have been finetuned and represent the way the world works, they represent truth.

Your current self is challenging/protesting the advice TRP is giving you. As said, this has happened numerous of times, in the end showing the same result.

So the advice about the advice: follow the advice, blindly, because it's what you will believe in a few months, your future self will thank your current self for blindly and unwillingly (at least at the time) following the advice on here. Your situation is not unique and the advice has been proven time and time again to be the best you can do in your situation.

We're all sorry for your situation, that's why TRP was started and help is offered. Do as said on here, and see you on the other side!

[deleted] · 2015-08-19T13:13:20+00:00

[permanently deleted]

RPMahoutsukai · 2015-08-19T10:04:00+00:00

You are feeling the loss. You lost her, because you respect yourself enough to know the relationship is over when she cheated on you, no matter if she was frank with you about it or not. You lost her and you feel bad because she was a part (maybe a major part) of what made you happy. And now you no longer have her and are no longer happy.

Read up on Inner Happiness. You need to become independent of outside sources for the purpose of happiness.

If you say or think "If/When I have (something) I am/will be happy", you become a slave of this (something). If you think you're happy because you have an LTR with a HB9, you will never be really happy. If you think you're happy because you have a six figure salary, you will never be really happy. You will be in constant fear that your source of happiness will be taken away, you will be clingy, and what you fear WILL happen to you, it's how life works.

After that, you can also read up on dread game, pedestalising women. You most likely did fail to dread her enough and did put her on a pedestal, at least somewhat. Understanding relationship dynamics will give you more control over your future LTR and will lower the chance of your SO cheating on you.

cmiovino · 2015-08-19T12:57:22+00:00

Similar story. Let LTR of 3 years go to Europe for 2 weeks with her cousin on a trip with 20 other people. They partied, got drunk, and she saw all the sights she dreamed to do for years. Little did I know she met a group of Australians, one guy in particular. Kept in contact with him for 6 months, then found he was coming to the states for Christmas and New Years.

I was really heartbroken about it. I tried to rationalize saying he'll never support her like I can, the distance thing won't work, and he won't have a job or family if he comes here. He came and I had to go through the pain and aggravation of seeing the girl a actually loved travel the east coast for a week, smiling, having fun, drinking, and enjoying the holidays with said Australian.

A week or two after that, I was defriended by her on Facebook, along with her cousins and few other family members. I'll admit, I cried about it, beat myself up over it, and tried everything to get her back. Nothing worked. She was a lost soul even before she went on that trip.

Thus I found TRP and didn't look back.

Chinzon · 2015-08-19T12:45:18+00:00

The best thing is when you catch them with before you invest yourself top far. I spent some time with a woman and mistakenly started thinking she might be an honest straightforward person, but a message on her phone quickly resolved my mistaken thoughts. Promptly kicked her ass out. No closure- I value my time over your feelings.

whenfoom · 2015-08-19T16:23:13+00:00

Gonna be a rough set of months ahead. Things will never be the same between you. You may consider the idea of patching things up - but her sin will not be forgotten or forgiven, and be forever present in your future with her, and called to mind everytime people ask about 'how you two are doing.' It's not worth getting in that life, because if you stay with a women who treats you like you're disposible, you'll come to see yourself that way. And you'll only pive once, so don't put yourself in that prison.

SoleSoulSeoul · 2015-08-19T16:42:47+00:00

Der Hunger kommt beim Essen und Aller Anfang ist schwer.

It's important to remind yourself that this is no matter to be so upset over. It's purely nature's course. It's like getting upset about a dog barking: Sure, you think you've trained it well enough to not do that terribly annoying thing, but every now and again, it's still going to happen.

Mein Beileid freund

Ali0_o · 2015-08-19T18:07:08+00:00

She was in a monogamous relationship with you, she chose to be with you. She cheated on you. She had sex with another dude, that was her choice. She decided to have sex with another man, while knowing she was with you. Not a mistake. Not an accident. Didn't "just happen".

Men and women are attracted to many people of the opposite sex, they can choose to act on impulses or not. She made the choice to be a slut and cheat on you. That shows she is pure filth. In Sharia law, an adulterous man or woman gets stoned to death for infidelity while in wedlock. I have zero problem with this punishment.

Delete her number, block her facebook, remove the whore from your life. When you catch yourself thinking of her, dismiss the thought until you are "desensitized" to intrusive thoughts of her.

I've rejected the advances of multiple girls, always making my girlfriend my top priority.

Don't reject, flirt and tease the other girls IN FRONT OF YOUR (next) GIRLFRIEND. Make her jealous, it makes her angry short term, but long term she will remain loyal to you.

...Either way, nobody is perfect, not even the most alpha male of alphas. Just focus on yourself and make women a lower priority.

GrandmasterHurricane · 2015-08-19T22:13:06+00:00

I've been on the same boat brig. I know the feels. Your image of her is shattered and it hurts. Never forget that your perception of a relationship doesn't matter, because a relationship takes two people and there is a half who's perspective you'll never be able to see from.

Here's what you do from now on. You cut all contact with her. Absolutely no explanation, no reasoning. That will leave a gaping hole into her dark soul that no amount of cocks or jewelry can ever fill. Delete her text history and delete her number. Delete her off all social media, but don't block her. Blocking inplies you're trying really hard to remove her from your life. A causal delete is a whole lot more powerful. If you had her close friends as friends, consider deleting them too unless u think you can make a B-Line to their pussy successfully at some point. If you can't band, delete them because they will snoop for her and she can always check on you from their profiles.

Because people take social media so seriously, hit her with a dagger by changing your profile pic to you doing something that makes you happy. Make sure you have a huge smile on. This photo will remind you of where your head needs to be. You are now a free man and have just dodged a bullet.

Now read the sidebar, go lift and be you.

fuckoffdikhed · 2015-08-20T00:32:46+00:00

Felt like you do after my first relationship and pre red pill.

Nowdays if she cheats i jist say "im glad I didn't waste any more time on this girl".

I'd rather them reveal themselves as a chester early rather thsn later - to the point where I don't pit any restrictions on my gf.

Let her go out, let her dress slutty. Dont try to hold a slut down coz a slut is gonna do what she does best. Let your gf have tonnes of opportunity to cheat on you early on, that way you can learn her true colours.

ThrowAway652478 · 2015-08-20T05:39:49+00:00

Don't feel anything. Cheating is a sign of extreme disrespect. Cut all contact.

Sworn_to_Ganondorf · 2015-08-20T20:00:58+00:00

My girlfriend would be dead to me and I really woukd try not to feel hurt because why be worked up over someone that didnt respect me and stabbed me in the back. Shes a slut and doesnt deserve my time of day.

[deleted] · 2015-08-19T15:04:01+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Ninenine222 · 2015-08-18T23:54:58+00:00

I'm new to the Red Pill, kinda, and what I was thinking about this situation is totally the opposite of what I've read in the comments. Yeah, she fucked up. Yeah, leaving her will solve the issue. Are there other ways to solve the issue besides leaving the girl you're into? I think so.
She was honest about it. I believe in second chances, depending on the case. If she cheats again then all trust is lost, cut your losses. If she genuinely is regretful and OP doesn't think she'll do it again, try it out. There's no point in losing a good thing over a bad situation. This is all considering you still are into her. There's all this speculation here on TRP that she's not excited anymore, that you're too comfortable, how she thinks "I can do better", etc. etc. Well, OP, does she think that? Talk with her, seriously. Not all women are the same, although clearly there are similarities. The calls on you OP.

mrpinecone12 · 2015-08-19T16:02:08+00:00

What you should feel is disappointment, for a second. You have rid the ferris wheel. The music has stopped playing and another kid is standing in line with a ticket ready to take your seat.

Its OK. The kid is excited and you've had your fun. There are many other attractions at the fair you should be dying to try out.

Maybe you'll hop on something more fun? Who knows.. Ask any parent that the crying usually stops after they've seen something else their kid is intrigued by and wants to try out.

ARedSchoolofThought · 2015-08-18T23:32:22+00:00

Happened to me. Cheat back. Leave evidence, for me it was not washing my sheets. Essentially, let her know she is a plate and just another hole for you to fill. Stop spending money on her and take care of yourself.

-rubashov · 2015-08-19T11:25:18+00:00

Obvious troll post. If you know enough to post it here then you'll know enough to read the damn sidebar and know better than to post such whiny crap.

No one cares about your feelings, this is the real world not fantasy land, piss back off to r/relationships if that's what you want.

Title	What do you feel when someone cheats
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	50
Comments	245
Date	August 18, 2015 4:32 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3hgpo9/what_do_you_feel_when_someone_cheats/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/what-do-you-feel-when-someone-cheats.35659 https://theredarchive.com/post/35659

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