Your salary after separation

Due-Cranberry8690 · 2023-08-28T18:01:53+00:00

Sounds like you have a case of shut the fuk ups. I've been divorced a few years and my CS still calculated based on my salary a few years ago.

EnvironmentalAd3558 · 2023-08-28T17:46:12+00:00

Alimony is a function of the state you are in. Some it is according to a formula and others on need. Some think an able bodied adult should provide for themselves. Others believe that if the ex has been disadvantaged by the marriage that for a period of time it should be granted for transition back to the work force.

Acceptable_Piano4809 · 2023-08-28T19:45:23+00:00

Alimony should be illegal… now child support, I understand, but alimony is ridiculous. Why should one human being be forced to support another?

Salty-Rutabaga-3329 · 2023-08-28T17:55:06+00:00

CA here.

My first lawyer painted a bleak picture. According to him...

I was married for almost 20 years so I'd owe LIFETIME alimony.
Alimony can be adjusted to match salary (up and down) any time up to retirement.
I would need a solid reason for my salary to go down. Resigning or under earning better come with a good explanation.
If I legitimately lost my job I'd still owe alimony until I could get a court date to lower the amount. I guess the trick here is to have several months of alimony savings. Not sure.
I may not be able to pick my retirement age. She might have a heavy influence on when I could retire. I certainly couldn't retire early.
I may have to continue any existing life insurance policies with the same beneficiary split going to my ex. In other words, I needed to bet against my own life so my ex could be comfy if I escaped alimony by death.
She could easily play games to avoid cohabitation or marriage to continue monthly payments. #3 above is sort of a game that is heavily checked. But apparently not remarrying is a game that is perfectly okay. My ex told me several times pre-divorce that this is exactly what she'd do.
I could be in court every other month fighting this kind of thing anytime she decided to rock the boat.

Like I said, he was my FIRST lawyer and for a reason. My second lawyer wouldn't really comment on the topics or the odds. But the second sounded aggressive and willing to fight for me. We just focused on a buyout.

I have no idea if the first lawyer was spouting accurate or even likely scenarios. A lot of lawyer websites say this stuff is absolutely possible. But that might be scare tactics to drum up business.

Could do an unofficial reddit poll. Has anyone been bitten by any of stuff above?

AdrianInLimbo · 2023-08-28T16:58:22+00:00

its probably whatever your income is when the court/judge sets alimony and support. I believe, after a certain time period, in some states, they can go back to ask for a modification of support, check the laws in your area.

In places like that, it's almost like you're being punished for digging out of the hole created by the divorce, and penalized for doing better.

For child support, I have no issue with adjustment being made for income, either an increase or decrease. But for alimony, fuck you, you got your percentage of what a person makes at the time, get a job.

And sure as shit, they'll drag out, or refuse, reducing support if your income drops.

DatabaseSpace · 2023-08-28T17:36:38+00:00

It won’t automatically change but if she finds out that it changed she can request a change in support and you will have to pay it. The time when it can’t change is after your settlement agreement and divorce are final and there is language in the agreement saying it can’t change. If she loses her job, she can claim a change to $0 income and request an increase.

guy_n_cognito_tu · 2023-08-28T17:09:17+00:00

Wishful thinking, my man. Child support can be recalculated at any time until that child is emancipated. It will depend on the state for alimony.

Humble_Face_4600 · 2023-08-28T18:26:19+00:00

In my state the spouse can request increases after 3 years and if I make 15% or more income. I’m confused with working part time jobs like Uber, will that count?

Lumpy-Prior3261 · 2023-08-28T18:39:34+00:00

The later and they can go back a request it to increase if the want I think it's after 2 years I'm not sure on how many maybe 3 year s but what about your 401k or any pension you have they get part of that also that's what I don't get

azwildcat74 · 2023-08-28T18:52:10+00:00

In my state child support can be modified based on your income changing. Not sure how it works here on alimony.

pk2at · 2023-08-28T19:48:04+00:00

If you ask your lawyer, you will certainly get a wrong answer

dnbndnb · 2023-08-29T00:37:46+00:00

Here’s what you do. You put together all the financials based on the date of separation. Paycheck stubs, tax, receipts, brokerage accounts, savings, accounts, etc. Then give all that to your attorney to submit to her attorney. You might get lucky, and he may not ask if you got a raise.

Throwaway4120213 · 2023-08-31T02:58:59+00:00

Here is what likely happens.

In discovery - they will ask for 3-5 years of W2s and your current paystub. In my State - while soft rule of thumb is average of last 3yrs - there’s no set rule. So it becomes a negotiation. They will try to get it based on your paystub if it’s higher. You will argue it’s elevated due to a temporary reason. If your lawyer is good - you will settle on something in between. If not - then the higher number likely wins or a Judge decides.

I would think twice about disclosing to your lawyer. For me - I got a 1x signing bonus and a higher than expected bonus in the year of my divorce - I legitimately had a reason to request an average be used. My divorce dragged for 1yr and by the time of mediation - I got the following year’s bonus (but hadn’t filed taxes yet) and disclosed that number which was similar to the high end vs an average. My lawyer basically used it against me to strongarm an agreement. She didn’t really fight as hard since ‘I make a ton of money and could afford the alimony.’

I’d say just wait. See what the other side comes back with in terms of discovery. If they fail to ask for current pay stubs - not your problem.

Title	Your salary after separation
Author	HereinPA1
Upvotes	10
Comments	33
Date	August 28, 2023 4:43 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/163r3jo/your_salary_after_separation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/your-salary-after-separation.1229998 https://theredarchive.com/post/1229998

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