Nothing ever screamed LVM like this guy

kinnnion · 2020-02-18T03:34:44+00:00

This has to be a troll but we can never forget that men always have the audacity

JoyJonesIII · 2020-02-18T03:47:34+00:00

And what's he offering in return? Obviously not good looks...

AyemHerself · 2020-02-18T03:48:27+00:00

Meanwhile, a woman needs to be supermodel hot in order to expect her partner to have a job and a penis that isn't curved.

mephitmpH · 2020-02-18T04:05:20+00:00

I swear these average dudes have egos the size of the fucking moon. It's insane. They really think they're worth their weight in gold when all they offer is a dad bod and a dick that smells like cheese.

7_0f_9 · 2020-02-18T04:00:27+00:00

[deleted]

ThinkTofu · 2020-02-18T04:03:49+00:00

This is fake. The formatting is off.

mydeepestinnerworks · 2020-02-18T03:29:15+00:00

🤮

Sage_Planter · 2020-02-18T03:38:58+00:00

Wow... What a dream boat...

ItsaToast · 2020-02-18T05:03:40+00:00

Probably posted by an ex gf 😂

--wellDAM-- · 2020-02-18T05:07:42+00:00

Porn has made him think he can order a woman online.

purasangria · 2020-02-18T06:14:16+00:00

TL;DR: Potato head man seeks toned blonde or brunette to be his sex slave. He looks like a truck, but won't settle.

The entitlement!!

Nearby-Armadillo · 2020-02-18T03:35:08+00:00

🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

randomgirlimok · 2020-02-18T06:10:16+00:00

A full time job AND cook/clean?! Delusional

TiffStyles2221 · 2020-02-18T05:09:16+00:00

🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 There is NO WAY this guy goes to the gym even once a week or makes over $70k... or even bathes properly every day. Wtf!!!

MsgFromSnail · 2020-02-18T11:59:29+00:00

Did he like stumble into the accessories section of some store, put on the hat and sunglasses and was like "damn i look great" and take a selfie or something??

itsallsoconfusing · 2020-02-18T05:28:07+00:00

Jonathan is going to be so so single forever!

Skittleschild02 · 2020-02-18T05:25:12+00:00

I am thankful that I don’t fit the criteria for these dudes in dating apps. Not missing anything.

Bovvsette · 2020-02-18T06:22:34+00:00

Is this a parody? Surely no one is that daft to demand qualities from others that they couldn't pull off themselves. Just imagine all the supermodels who got their shit together, lining up for an unsatisfying cheesy dick. Who could resist such offer? 😂

menalit · 2020-02-18T07:26:18+00:00

i think he's lost. this is an order for a sex robot.

myousername · 2020-02-18T17:46:52+00:00

He wants her to go to gym and have 70k/year salary, but she must be available for him at all times?

Also, "devote as much of her time to him as possible" 🤮

StillAwakeofCourse · 2020-02-18T07:39:28+00:00

There is an inverse correlation between the length of demands and the appearance of the man. The longer the list, the schlubbier the dude.

iamjillpinkman · 2020-02-18T04:18:09+00:00

This is copypasta lol, he's probably joking. BUT you can't be too careful these day lol...

responsiblenatures · 2020-02-18T04:20:36+00:00

Eh. Good luck.

Raebrained · 2020-02-18T07:27:49+00:00

Grumbles in 5'1 🙄🙄🙄

Rachel-Lioness · 2020-02-18T13:47:13+00:00

Wow. What an ass. I'm 5'0 so I guess I don't qualify. Too bad lol. 🙄 Obviously I'm being sarcastic here lmao.

vp2407 · 2020-02-18T14:31:23+00:00

I still can't tell if this is a joke or if men just be like that. The delusion

cannedboelyn · 2020-02-18T20:23:12+00:00

Definitely a troll most likely who is trying to troll this sub

cactus_blossm · 2020-02-18T04:15:43+00:00

Yuck

ashleecakes · 2020-02-18T07:04:35+00:00

Is he being ironic?

505ithy · 2020-02-18T07:28:52+00:00

LMFAOOOOO

Brisket_Queen · 2020-02-18T18:03:43+00:00

Meanwhile he's a 4 on a good day? This made me vomit a little

grimreapersdtr · 2020-02-19T01:54:08+00:00

He wants a woman who likes to “clean”, but he’s too lazy to shave.

hotvenom6 · 2020-02-18T06:20:45+00:00

eeeewww

balladwilds · 2020-02-18T09:43:00+00:00

AND HES SO UGLY LMAOOOO

Blondejobs · 2020-02-18T19:01:45+00:00

Lmao bud when are you gonna realize you have nothing to offer a woman if she has any of those things, or none of them at all.

bitch_not_it · 2020-02-22T05:57:10+00:00

“I NEVER GET ANY FUKIN MATCHES THESE STUPID SHALLOW GOLD DIGGING BITCHES IM THE PERFECT CHUBBY GENTLEMAN MY PENIS IS PETITE. AWALT AWALT AWALT” he smashes onto his keyboard on the various incel forums he regular visits, when he’s not figuring out ways to find “legal” jailbait porn

Yggie · 2020-02-18T05:36:23+00:00

[removed]

Title	Nothing ever screamed LVM like this guy
Author	jchrix
Upvotes	242
Comments	74
Date	February 18, 2020 3:27 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/f5l8tr/nothing_ever_screamed_lvm_like_this_guy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/nothing-ever-screamed-lvm-like-this-guy.693710 https://theredarchive.com/post/693710

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