Why do women hate cheating?

ItsTheHardCockLife · 2020-11-06T02:46:35+00:00

Here is the thing. It doesn't matter what sex you are, nobody likes being lied to.

If you go into a relationship, say you only want something monogamous, therefore limiting someone from having anything with anyone else, and then go behind that person's back and not live up to the rules you set, have an affair, hide that affair and still expect the person to be happy then it's a bit whack.

Open relationships are a thing because people are honest enough to say, "Hey, I love you but I can feel live for multiple people or I also enjoy sex with other people."

When you cheat, you go behind the other person's back and basically say, "Fuck you and this bond we made together, I would prefer to lie to your face about you being everything I want and then also go and do whatever I want regardless of how you feel."

It's also expecting someone else to be loyal the entire time and then going and not doing the same. Expecting everyone to one thing and then and going and doing something else is a dick move.

SmurfESmurferson · 2020-11-06T03:59:28+00:00

why is it hard for women to understand that it’s possible for men to be deeply in love in a LTR and yet want to have casual sex with other women?

It’s not hard to believe, because women want to fuck other hot guys. The desire to screw people you’re physically attracted to is not unique to men

In a monogamous relationship, both partners agree that the relationship is more important than acting like they’re single. So they agree to devote all of their sexual and romantic energy to the relationship, because it’s that important

Cheating is breaking that promise, a demonstration that the relationship/the person is not important, and an overall betrayal. Not to mention that some STDs can wreck women’s fertility permanently, he could literally be robbing her of future kids

_mwk · 2020-11-06T04:31:21+00:00

well, let's see :betrayal, lies, disrespect, disregard for your partner's wellbeing, insecurity, concern for safety, ego, betrayal over potential children involved.

being cheated on is the one thing that triggers psycho thoughts in me. like id feel no remorse and feel even pleasure making him miserable in the worst ways. it would hurt, enrage me, vengeful like i am and i know myself enough to know that that combination would make him seem less than human to me so the regrets will be out of the window

LittyKitsune · 2020-11-06T03:32:50+00:00

Because the man basically makes a decision for his partner that isn't his to make.

Let's say a man in a relationship does want to have sex with other women, or vice versa. Tell her, she gets the choice of whether or not to leave. Men cheat when they already know what the answer's going to be. So they avoid putting that choice in front of her at all.

Cimorene86 · 2020-11-06T02:49:37+00:00

Women hate cheating for the same reasons men do.

Breach of trust to not be at risk for stds. Lying that you are exclusive. Jealous that your partner has found someone who may be better sexually. Fear of your partner leaving you for this new person. Possible destruction of your relationship if a pregnancy develops. Wondering why you're not good enough for them to stay.

Possibility of them using the cheating to punish or manipulate you. Knowledge that someone else has had sex with your partner while you're supposedly together. Emotional pain because of them deciding to seek physical intimacy with a stranger instead of you, their partner.

In other news, women and men have the same kinds of emotions, and water is wet.

SaBahRub · 2020-11-06T03:58:17+00:00

I dunno. Why do men hate cheating?

Womens....so mysterious! So inexplicable!

Mimoxs · 2020-11-06T02:59:36+00:00

I refuse to believe this question is being asked unironically. What circle-of-hell equivalent within the manosphere do you gotta be in to where this is a question that has any answer other than "it is a completely normal and generally universal reaction to feel betrayed by disloyalty". Why do women have to have some kind of secret psychology going on underneath normal human feelings it's like men can't accept women are normal people

Even if one tries to have open honest conversations about this, why is it hard for women to understand that it's possible for men to be deeply in love in a LTR and yet want to have casual sex with other women?

Bc it's not. If that is how you feel you don't actually love that woman.

NarniaFox · 2020-11-06T03:36:11+00:00

Is it because cheating is a fundamental breach of trust?

Yes it is. If your partner cheats on you, it shows that they are untrustworthy, their words and promises cost nothing and they don't care about you, your feelings and health. Plus, they're ready to risk your relationships and future together for a fling.

why is it hard for women to understand that it's possible for men to be deeply in love in a LTR and yet want to have casual sex with other women?

It's quite easy, but most people aren't okay with it. You can't have your cake and eat it too. If you don't want to have monogamous relationships, you should seek a partner who is okay with it in the first place. Open relationships, polygamous relationships etc.

A person who is strictly into monogamy doesn't have to tolerate a partner who can't deal with it and vice versa.

Willow-girl · 2020-11-06T04:45:48+00:00

We want it all to ourselves. Next question?

Sid_Insidious · 2020-11-06T07:52:46+00:00

[permanently deleted]

thetruthishere_ · 2020-11-06T02:45:55+00:00

Does anyone like being cheated on?

Why is it hard to understand if you're in a committed relationship you should not cheat?

You want casual sex dont get into a relationship.

Dora_Bowl · 2020-11-06T04:23:59+00:00

It is a betrayal of trust.

mangolover97 · 2020-11-06T04:39:50+00:00

It’s a breach of trust and it makes you feel like you wasted your time. You’ve invested time, energy and emotions into a relationship thinking you’ll both be monogamous only for him to violate that. You’ll feel hurt and betrayed then once that dies down you just feel dumb that you were faithful to him because you loved him when the whole time you were getting played and you probably could’ve gone off and found a better guy.

IncelandrosOfAthens · 2020-11-06T06:11:26+00:00

It is only healthy to have an attitude of hatred towards cheating. No sense in being friendly with someone who doesn't value trust.

Reisiluu · 2020-11-06T06:52:24+00:00

All of the above and I also like to think that my man is mine. He's not really mine if he's handing out dick to any hoe who asks. Especially if that results in an affair child. Then he'd also be handing out money that belongs to our kids.

rubbooyuri · 2020-11-06T04:31:56+00:00

“Even if one tries to have open honest conversations about it, why is it hard for men to understand that hypocrisy and double standards are unattractive?”

(I hope they never do, however; it makes weeding them out pretty easy)

AnarchoNAP · 2020-11-06T05:02:52+00:00

If you want to fuck randos, then don't enter a monogamous relationship. This isn't complicated.

_Neon_Shadow_ · 2020-11-06T02:31:38+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2020-11-06T02:49:17+00:00

What's the point of being in a relationship if he's cheating on you?

GridReXX · 2020-11-06T02:49:57+00:00

It’s an ego thing for me.

The idea that he wants me to be okay with him having sex with other women, but will have an aneurysm if I have a fun tipsy night making out with a hottie at the club or a get together with my friends doesn’t sit well with me. It would actually enrage me.

I’m sure it would enrage you too OP. Perhaps for different reasons but all the same.

I also personally think men are more reckless. I personally know of a husband who brought home STDs to his wife. So it’s just a risky scenario to accept.

goatismycopilot · 2020-11-06T02:34:48+00:00

You can want to have casual sex with other people and not act on it. Cheating can in some cases be humiliating depending on the circumstances, dangerous, once it c omes to light then the other person will always have doubts. I guess if you are going to cheat better for the other person never to know.

nik6979 · 2020-11-06T08:30:30+00:00

Why do men hating cheating , men are very emotional and even some consider suicide over relationship with infidelity . This isn't just a man or woman issue ,it's a human issue .

_Lemon_Stealer_ · 2020-11-06T12:18:59+00:00

It's not only disrespectful to me, it's disrespectful to my body.

ConsultJimMoriarty · 2020-11-06T08:39:56+00:00

That's not a 'woman' thing.

Everyone takes a dim view of cheating. There's a difference between thinking someone is hot/cute and actively pursuing that connection.

The first one is normal human behaviour. The second is an active act of betrayal.

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BIGFACTS98 · 2020-11-06T04:43:43+00:00

Nobody likes cheating but women will generally put up with it more often than men will because cheating although hurtful, displays value.

Women only hate cheating on the surface

Reality gives us multitudes of examples of women going back to men who cheat on them. This is a very common occurrence so much so that their are a prevalence of memes on it that women circulate amongst themselves referring to constantly going back to some form of “toxic guy” that cheats, is unresponsive, abusive, etc. but nevertheless gets their vaginas tingly.

Pay attention to what women do not what they say.

cheating for men is much more detrimental to their sexual strategy than it is for women so men have evolved much less tolerance for it. though, again women aren’t perfectly tolerant of it either. Cheating usually means the end of the relationship, if at least for the time being. As lack of self control is a negative trait even though you may be simultaneously displaying a positive trait through it (sexual value and abundance.)

If you actually turn yourself around, there is usually a strong chance of reconciliation for men who cheat so long as they either mitigate their behavior for the future or increase their value tremendously by the time they make the mistake again.

I’ve been in this situation myself more than once.

Also recognize that men of high value are tempted to cheat much more than normal men and women subconsciously understand this. I’ve had women mention to me in passing that they notice other women looking at me. Which is strange if you consider what, if any reason a woman would have to notice this. Though not strange when you understand female sexuality

“Female copulatory orgasm and male partner’s attractiveness to his partner and other women”

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886915001002

“Who’s chasing whom? The impact of gender and relationship status on mate poaching”

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0022103109001048?via%3Dihub

It’s rarely a good idea to cheat anyway, better to just keep it pushing and avoid the drama for yourself or your partner.

Though women certainly forgive the action much more than men do and the reasons are logical.

death_by_1000_cats · 2020-11-06T04:29:49+00:00

Even if one tries to have open honest conversations about this, why is it hard for women to understand that it's possible for men to be deeply in love in a LTR and yet want to have casual sex with other women?

It isn't hard to understand that he'd want to. I want to do all kinds of things that would hurt my husband or cause damage to our relationship. I choose not to do them because...they would hurt my husband and cause damage to our relationship. It's the choice to do something that you know would hurt your spouse that's the problem. It says "I know what I'm doing would hurt you, possibly so much that it would cause you to leave me. I'm choosing to do it anyway because what I want is more important to me right now."

Is it because cheating is a fundamental breach of trust? Or is it a deep-seated fear that cheating may lead to the risk of dissolution of the relationship and the man directing their resources elsewhere?

Both? I don't think you can really separate these things. It's a threat to the relationship and that's why it's a breach of trust. It's also a threat to your health, your stability and your reputation. Cheating doesn't hurt for only one reason, it's like a million betrayals in one.

neetykeeno · 2020-11-10T00:35:26+00:00

I don't care if you call cheating compatible with love, I just don't agree with that and when you do it I feel that you don't actually understand love.

cuddlemechloe · 2020-11-19T21:17:13+00:00

I mean, yes to all those probably? I don't think this is a gendered question. Men hate being cheated on too.

Most men think of it as an act of love too, both personally anecdotal to my experiences, and if the incel sites full of "look at this cute cartoon or picture of a couple being sweet with each other"- you'll never have this posts are anything to go by. Or opines about never experiencing the feelings of being cared about, peace & complete acceptance sex brings. And how terribly cruel it is for women to deny them that. The way they talk about sex makes me feel like they are actually talking about love & loneliness.

I think there are plenty of men who'd dislike their partner trying to start a conversation "Hey, I'm deeply in love in a LTR with you and yet want to have casual sex with other men." I mean, isn't that a lot of what redpillers are pissed about? The concept of women, as a monolith, wanting a nice man LTR and wanting to nail "hot chads" too?

Paladin_of_the_Lord · 2021-03-14T03:28:55+00:00

Because of the atheism in secular society, people only 'half-believe' that sex is sacred. So while you can espouse a mechanical solution for your problems, it does not account for the spiritual aspect of the universe. Sex outside of marriage, is detrimental to all. Everyone wants it all. But we have decided based on spirituality, that monogamy is the only fair way.

If you disagree that sex isn't sacred. Then why is rape a greater or even different crime than assault? The penalty for rape in most of the world for most of time was death. That is an extreme difference from an eye for an eye, and the actual physical damage it might cause. We assume spiritual reality and the possibility of damaging that aspect of being.

Title	Why do women hate cheating?
Author	Beat_yesterday
Upvotes	0
Comments	169
Date	November 6, 2020 2:25 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/jowje1/why_do_women_hate_cheating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-do-women-hate-cheating.1193717 https://theredarchive.com/post/1193717

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