Would you rather a man has a mask on while getting to know you in the early stages or that he is unabashedly himself and genuine?

Siukslinis_acc · 2024-08-05T17:10:13+00:00

Being genuine from the start. Ths way I won't bond with the wrong person. It's more hurtful when you realise that the person you bonded with was a lie and never existed than knowing that the person is not your "type" and not bond with them.

Also it's less waste of time if you end it in the beginning rather than years later.

ughtheinternet · 2024-08-05T16:57:55+00:00

Obviously I’d rather he be himself???

I’m curious to know what up think the benefit of the mask would even be.

Corbast7 · 2024-08-05T17:08:04+00:00

(men think fucked up shit)

Speak for yourself. I’ve been in an LTR with my guy for over 5 years and he’s still the same guy as he was when we were getting to know each other. I prefer authenticity so I can know sooner rather than later whether or not we’re compatible.

mlo9109 · 2024-08-05T17:12:53+00:00

I think everyone of all genders should be their true selves from the get-go. And be clear about their intentions. The lying, vagueness, and masking are among the top reasons dating today is such a shit show.

EulenWatcher · 2024-08-05T17:14:30+00:00

What’s the point of a mask? It’s in his interest to come off palatable, but it’s absolutely not in my interest dating a person who’s pretending someone else.

Nearbykingsmourne · 2024-08-05T16:59:38+00:00

The risk for reward is high in both scenarios because you might hate the person from the beginning or realize you hate him in the end

Well no, cause of I hate him from the beginning I know not to continue the relationship?

uglysaladisugly · 2024-08-05T17:20:47+00:00

Why would I want to waste months of my life in a relationship with someone who isn't actually compatible with me?

lil_kleintje · 2024-08-05T17:23:49+00:00

Normally, people's functional/circumstantial masks are pretty accurate (but slightly brushed up) representations of them. The very fake kind is usually a sign of serious pathology - e.g. personality disorders like ASPD or NPD.

KarenEiffel · 2024-08-05T17:27:46+00:00

Absolutely genuine, for sure. Why bother otherwise?

LiftSushiDallas · 2024-08-05T17:43:43+00:00

Unabashedly genuine and DGAF.

DJ_Dialga · 2024-08-05T16:59:39+00:00

I’d rather he be himself but hold his cards close since he’s getting to know a stranger.

half_avocado33 · 2024-08-05T18:05:40+00:00

I want the real him.

Why wear a mask? I might not like the mask, but love the real him.

Or i might hate the real him so i want to know from the beginning. No point in wasting each other's time.

attendquoi · 2024-08-05T17:26:19+00:00

Who on earth would want the first one? Let me reject him now, it saves us both time lol

DJ_Dialga · 2024-08-05T16:59:39+00:00

I’d rather he be himself but hold his cards close since he’s getting to know a stranger.

ScarletRedShadow · 2024-08-05T19:42:21+00:00

Just be honest

januaryphilosopher · 2024-08-05T20:38:59+00:00

I'd rather he be himself. I have no time for games and will present my own genuine self. But I will only date someone who's genuinely nice, not the "fucked up" men you're describing (please don't tell me you're so misandrist as to think that's all of them). If he's really someone I'd hate I'll end up hating him either way so might as well be upfront rather than wasting our time.

SaBahRub · 2024-08-05T18:37:22+00:00

Everyone should be on their best behavior

apresonly · 2024-08-05T22:01:48+00:00

uh i obviously don't want to get tricked into dating someone?

MistyMaisel · 2024-08-06T02:58:48+00:00

Be honest, obviously. Then if we don't mesh we both know right away and can move on?

egalitarian-flan · 2024-08-06T11:04:16+00:00

Genuine from the start, just like I'm genuine from the start. Surprised this is even a question. I can't imagine anyone picking the alternative.

Werevulvi · 2024-08-07T00:08:36+00:00

I'd rather he's genuine from the start. These are the kinda men I tend to get crushes on. The honesty is very attractive, I'm like a magnet to that shit. And yes on occasion it has led me to despise the guy because of the shitty personality he was so honest about, but it has never been the honesty in itself that was the problem. Some people just have shitty personalities, but that's an entirely separate issue.

DJ_Dialga · 2024-08-05T17:00:20+00:00

I’d rather he be himself but hold his cards close since he’s getting to know a stranger.

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