How to deal with a low effort person?

Dzekomeout · 2022-10-10T19:40:00+00:00

Yeah, you aren’t the only guy she’s seeing.

Sorry bro.

MediterraneanBastard · 2022-10-10T20:41:26+00:00

1.Some girls are just weird, they’ll show interest and then change their mind

She’s genuinely busy and you just need to give her some space.
When this stuff happens you need to either set up another date and if that doesn’t work out then move on and find someone that will put in effort.

SolidPuzzleheaded984 · 2022-10-10T19:48:19+00:00

Low effort means low interest

Altec5499 · 2022-10-10T22:20:37+00:00

Texting should not be a gauge for interest. In person experiences should be. Get off your phone

Blitted_Master · 2022-10-10T19:43:49+00:00

Move on. Women live in the moment and while there might’ve been some chemistry there wasn’t enough. Women have an enormous advantage in OLD and if you don’t make a significant, lasting impression on her then you’re just another guy.

mjornir · 2022-10-10T21:42:45+00:00

You ask to set the next time you see her and see how she responds. If she doesn’t meet up then you move on

GLight3 · 2022-10-10T20:28:39+00:00

You move on.

microhater · 2022-10-10T22:53:06+00:00

Look if we all have to compete, then fking compete. I like using Spotify and creating song list with the one I’m into. You don’t have to text and if you’re into the same music you can create a connection that way. Now if her music sucks - this is a terrible idea 🤷‍♂️

Striking-Panic3120 · 2022-10-10T20:04:58+00:00

She’s lost interest, if she cared you wouldn’t be here

The-Dude0411 · 2022-10-10T20:52:25+00:00

Sometimes, presenting the fact that theyre behaving disinterested has gotten me really far.

"Hey, you've been super distant since we met up, I was curious what's up?" Usually, it'll at least initiate enough of an interaction that you can figure out if they're totally over you. I try to use that interaction to schedule the next date though, as I am better irl.

zapadz · 2022-10-10T20:17:58+00:00

Ask her out again, maybe she just sucks at texting

AtDaLastMinute · 2022-10-10T21:51:16+00:00

Don't text at all. The only thing you should be using your phone for is to set up dates.

DecentGas6671 · 2022-10-10T22:00:39+00:00

You don’t

motherseffinjones · 2022-10-10T22:30:33+00:00

Low effort mean cut her off, that’s how I roll at least. Why would you chase someone who doesn’t want you lol

warbloggled · 2022-10-11T00:52:28+00:00

Until a relationship is solidified, texting should be used only as a means of setting up and confirming dates.

Otherwise you get what you got.

Tutorzilla · 2022-10-11T01:09:07+00:00

I hate when guys expect me to text them a lot. I don’t know what to say to them that wasn’t covered on the date. We don’t have many inside jokes yet. The more a guy pressures me to text, the less chance I’ll open his texts because it feels like I’m being smothered and I just want to ignore it. Just ask her on a second date and only text about logistics or a “thinking of you” message. She has a full life and up until now you weren’t in it. Give a girl a minute.

Prestigious-Prune483 · 2022-10-11T01:29:49+00:00

There’s someone out there who will match your energy and ideals. Don’t waste time on the wrong person!

rich_god · 2022-10-10T21:44:04+00:00

1-2 texts per day is generally too much. Obviously each person is different, but most girls I'm seeing is more like 1-2 texts a week, sometimes even less. Texts are for logistics and some cute "thinking about you" once in a while. But yeah, there is this girl I see, when we're together it's very passionate and intimate, but I usually have to wait a couple weeks to get an answer to any message. I don't mind, I like her the way she is and we have good communication.

Also a looooooot of women have "post first kiss hangover". Basically they doubt themselves, maybe it was too fast, maybe now they have to commit to something they don't want to, blablabla. Basically they have emotions about what happened and don't know how to proceed so they close themselves off. My recommendation, if you really care about her, is to stay centered, confident, keep the connexion, stay authentic and remind her that there is no pressure on her and no expectation. Keep a positive vibe, be abundant, be available without being pushy.

Don't be afraid to talk about it, even a "I feel like you're a bit more distant since we saw each other, is there anything on your mind or that you're scared to share with me ?" can completely change the dynamic.

James_Cruse · 2022-10-10T22:09:07+00:00

Why do you need more than 1-2 texts per day? That’s not low effort - that’s alot more than I give people.

Just text back about actual meeting/dates until you get to know her better.

You don’t need any texts per day if you text a few times and it’s about meeting and she’s confirmed she’ll meet you.

Then no need to text - just meet in person.

DonLebanon91 · 2022-10-10T22:09:13+00:00

Give even less effort. If they push you away, then pull away.

TheReverendAlan · 2022-10-11T00:06:52+00:00

Move on ☮️♥️🎸

Successful-Try7035 · 2022-10-11T00:10:45+00:00

The best advice is you should deal with girls that give you highest level of interest. You could salvage it but she will eventually move on to the next thing that catches her eye. Move on

Complicated_Business · 2022-10-11T01:28:48+00:00

Three text rule. After three texts, you're done and it's on them to follow up. Just stick to that and you'll be fine.

MentalCelOmega · 2022-10-11T01:30:49+00:00

Kick them out of your life. That is how you deal with low effort individuals.

Heyyoktp · 2022-10-11T01:34:50+00:00

Go out with someone else. Stay strong, king.

froze_gold · 2022-10-11T01:46:16+00:00

Go no contact for a week and then ping her for a date

Thinker_97 · 2022-10-11T01:49:32+00:00

As much as it sucks to hear.. that person will be low effort in every other aspect as well. I know it’s hard to discern playing hard to get vs low effort, but the reality is, if a person wants you, they will make it clear.

Be a gentleman, and politely walk away. You deserve someone who reciprocates your energy.

gangweedsavedme · 2022-10-11T01:52:30+00:00

Be lower effort

thewisefrog416 · 2022-10-11T02:04:55+00:00

“How do you deal with a low effort person?”

You don’t.

Current_Profit · 2022-10-11T02:09:59+00:00

Move on

OkNefariousness9758 · 2022-10-10T22:04:17+00:00

Don't chase her, replace her. Fall back until she crawls back.

Just move on and get back on tinder. There's going to be a lot of women like that, just treat it like gambling. you'll win some, and you'll lose some

fazzavich · 2022-10-11T00:56:31+00:00

She's building a roster. You're on the bench. Cut contact and walk away immediately.

delta-whisky · 2022-10-10T23:33:23+00:00

Rule of thumb: if you’re confused, she’s not interested

Pickledsundae · 2022-10-11T00:30:23+00:00

I love using this text as one last hurrah:

"Lemme know when you're free so I can make sure I'm busy"

Dialgax · 2022-10-11T02:14:01+00:00

I ignore them when they are like that then they usually come back

yennybear888 · 2022-10-10T21:22:57+00:00

If your social media game is good, just keep doing your thing. Assuming you do cool stuff (with or without women), many of them will come back later on.

I just had a girl DM me today asking if I wanted to go on a trip with her and I haven't seen her in 3 years.

userisauser · 2022-10-10T21:24:30+00:00

Rule #1 Always make them invest.

tropicsGold · 2022-10-10T20:59:06+00:00

Have you given her anything to get excited about? Maybe bring up an exciting adventure at the beach, followed by dinner prepared by a famous chef. Women tend to gravitate towards fun and adventure.

Nice_Calligrapher452 · 2022-10-10T22:06:30+00:00

Well if you're texting her a bunch of times throughout the day after just making out once, it might be you coming off too strong. If you are, then maybe shes backed off cuz ur texting her a bunch. It also depends on what's being said in those texts, we don't know the full story. But if you're not doing that, then it seems like shes not interested.

Zenis · 2022-10-10T22:38:33+00:00

If you’ve asked her on a followup date and she hasn’t answered, that’s a no.

If you haven’t asked her on another date, that’s on you.

Andress1 · 2022-10-10T22:51:00+00:00

If you are barely getting responses it means she's not interested

Rymasq · 2022-10-10T22:52:26+00:00

Don’t text her unless it’s to make plans

dobbs1997 · 2022-10-10T23:00:25+00:00

well you shouldn’t really be talking to her on the daily, just set up the next meet up , have you done that ?

2022-10-10T23:23:11+00:00

My answer to these question is always if Chris brown is as the one who made out with her do you think she'd be dry with him? She's obviously someone who does this making out with r everyone , u ain't special in this situation and gotta just get over it

Jasonhardon · 2022-10-10T23:36:19+00:00

If you like her lay her then let her chase you after. It’s that simple. If you don’t like her next her 🤷🏻‍♂️

Sharp-Computer-2179 · 2022-10-10T23:44:55+00:00

Move on

ashwheee · 2022-10-11T00:05:22+00:00

There’s not enough context her to fully know why she’s acting this way, imo. Have you tried asking her on another date?

FaithInStrangers94 · 2022-10-11T00:07:03+00:00

1-2 messages per day is enough for me - how frequently do you want to message ?

vivid_spite · 2022-10-11T00:37:40+00:00

it depends how old she is, not everyone texts multiple times a day

Mymomdidwhat · 2022-10-11T00:44:03+00:00

She isn’t interested anymore. Move on

tonyrelic · 2022-10-11T00:44:17+00:00

I met a women while on vacation once. We started talking about on line dating. She told me she gets around 1-2 thousand Interested messages from guys a week lol. That’s why women want what they can’t have. It’s psychological

inline6throwaway · 2022-10-10T23:13:51+00:00

Find someone who puts forth more effort. Other people here said she's probably talking to other dudes. Start talking to other women

Title	How to deal with a low effort person?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	91
Comments	100
Date	October 10, 2022 7:28 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/y0nn2a/how_to_deal_with_a_low_effort_person/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-deal-with-a-low-effort-person.1248582 https://theredarchive.com/post/1248582

Comments